My ex has walked out of a long distance relationship with me after 2 years, supposedly because of distance, and now she's walked into another one!! Help me..
Q. Hello. it's Andy, and I'm not happy.. Tonight I finally checked my ex's profile on her facebook, after not doing so for some time. Turns out. she's going out with a guy who she used to go to college with. I'm a little taken back by this. What's ...
A. 21 December 2007: I support Andy... (read in full...)
My ex has walked out of a long distance relationship with me after 2 years, supposedly because of distance, and now she's walked into another one!! Help me..
Q. Hello. it's Andy, and I'm not happy.. Tonight I finally checked my ex's profile on her facebook, after not doing so for some time. Turns out. she's going out with a guy who she used to go to college with. I'm a little taken back by this. What's ...
A. 18 December 2007: Andy
isnt it good that we are not talking about your ex anymore.
:)... (read in full...)
My ex has walked out of a long distance relationship with me after 2 years, supposedly because of distance, and now she's walked into another one!! Help me..
Q. Hello. it's Andy, and I'm not happy.. Tonight I finally checked my ex's profile on her facebook, after not doing so for some time. Turns out. she's going out with a guy who she used to go to college with. I'm a little taken back by this. What's ...
A. 15 December 2007: Patience and moderation Andy.
You wont like to scare the ladies off by hasty moves...... (read in full...)
Where do I find decent girls with morals? Do they still exist?
Q. Hi all, I have been a little troubled lately. Yesterday I was chatting with a guy 4 years older than me online and I found out that he is a rich sex hound. Sex-crazed, no morals, rich, conceited and he doesn't give a damn about screwing around....
A. 15 December 2007: To some people morality and decency are 1950's concept and there is no difference for a woman or a man to f...around with 10, 20, 30 and 40 or more men or women.
to them you can f...around without your morality and character tainted or changed ... (read in full...)
I love him so much, but don't really miss him when he's away, is what I feel normal?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend nearly a year. We live together and have been friends for 10 years. He works away for a few weeks at a time. While I do miss him (sometimes very much, sometimes not bery much, depending on how busy I am etc) sometime...
A. 15 December 2007: I don't see anything wrong with your relationship. It looks great. ... (read in full...)
My ex wants me back but his feelings are bigger than mine
Q. Latley ive been confused.. i just started getting regrets with my last relationship. he texted me a few weeks ago saying that it has been an amazing 5 months that we have been going out and that we should do something to celebrate.. this really ...
A. 15 December 2007: he told me that he will do anything it takes for me to be happy and if it's a break from him that will make me happy then he will do it as long as he gets to see my beautiful smile... i kept a positvie attitude and when he asked me if we were ... (read in full...)
She leads me on and then says no. Why bother in the first place?
Q. This year I became friends with a girl who attended the same school as me. She one day asked me for my MSN and we furthered out conversations on MSN. As time passed by she seemed to keep talking to me almost every second of the day. Then one night ...
A. 15 December 2007: Ok. Lets pass this talk to her explain your feelings stuff!
Is she really worth the worry, all the energy you are wasting on her. She is not one in a million.
I am sorry, I hate these kind of capricious girls who make men puzzled.
Just giv... (read in full...)
My ex has walked out of a long distance relationship with me after 2 years, supposedly because of distance, and now she's walked into another one!! Help me..
Q. Hello. it's Andy, and I'm not happy.. Tonight I finally checked my ex's profile on her facebook, after not doing so for some time. Turns out. she's going out with a guy who she used to go to college with. I'm a little taken back by this. What's ...
A. 15 December 2007: Yes. thats it you had a great evening with a possible affair as a by product!
It will get even better, I am fully sure Andy!
And when the ex factor calls, you will really really be busy:)))... (read in full...)
I'm a married man but became utterly obsessed with a young co-worker. We've been friends for a while but I just can't stop thinking that I'm destined to be with her
Q. Hi, I am a married male with children, and I love my wife very much. I hired this girl (who has a boyfriend) who was almost 20 years younger than me for a 1 year term. She is extremely sociable, and has a good relationship with almost everyone she ...
A. 15 December 2007: I am glad you are coping by yourself. I am glad to hear the good news, congratulations to you that you have proved yourself a wise person to get out of this situation before ruining your marriage and career.... (read in full...)
Should I keep trying to get him back?
Q. hello,i meet this guy a few weeks ago, and he did all texting so he must have liked me eveything was going really well and i did stay round his house a few times where he wanted to have sex and i said to wait a little longer to i get used to him ...
A. 14 December 2007: No he is not on your level.
If he really liked you he would understand and respect your wishes and waited.
Please do not waste your time for this man, who primarily after scoring.... (read in full...)
I don't want him to meet my family - should I break it off?
Q. I have been in a relationship for 1 and a half years. We are in love but recently he moved to another country for work but then told me that he wants to meet my family and wants to make things work. I know I love him but the thought of taking him ...
A. 14 December 2007: I don't think you love him, as your man, and it is about time to be honest to yourself and to him.
Because also, you do not talk about another alternative: Telling him, you are not ready for a commitment, and you want to continue for sometime... (read in full...)
My ex girl wants to get back with me... am I playing second best here?
Q. hi, me and my gf broke up recently despite still loving each other, but the spark had gone. After we split she fancied a guy who also liked her, nothing happened and thie guy found someone else, my ex was really down and has now suggested that she ...
A. 14 December 2007: yeah I guess she is unserious. I don't think you are second best but she doesnt know what she is doing and I don't think you should trust her feelings, they are not deep down felt. So if you wanna pass time and end fighting and breaking up again go ... (read in full...)
He's displays affection, but is not as passionate as when we first started going out. Sometimes I feel he is not happy?
Q. Hi everyone Just need your advice really as Im confused. I have been with my boyfriend for 3 and a bit months now and we have slept together an all but I am confused as to how he feels and if he is actually wanting a committed relationship...
A. 14 December 2007: I thiink you went a bit fast, both of you,out of optimisim and naiviete, by meeting your parents and talking about the future.
It is too early to say anything from the 3.5 moths relationship although it kick started very well as I can tell, ma... (read in full...)
Open-relationship is making me self-conscious. What can I do?
Q. I'm not sure if I'm okay with the open relationship I have with my boyfriend. I don't think ordinarily I'd be so worried or upset, but the girls he wants to go after are thinner than me, and it makes me feel very self-conscious. Like, if he's go...
A. 14 December 2007: You are not ok with this clearly. Because his affairs bothers you and it appears it will bother you in any case.
Why and how did you accept open relationship, explain please.
did you go after any man, how did he react? ... (read in full...)
My ex has walked out of a long distance relationship with me after 2 years, supposedly because of distance, and now she's walked into another one!! Help me..
Q. Hello. it's Andy, and I'm not happy.. Tonight I finally checked my ex's profile on her facebook, after not doing so for some time. Turns out. she's going out with a guy who she used to go to college with. I'm a little taken back by this. What's ...
A. 13 December 2007: Yes Andy, you are my friend, and I am with you. I will tell you again, ye sstop contacting her, do not let her see you as your friend and agony aunt. The fact that she knew him while you were together, in my view, is little more distressing. So ... (read in full...)
My bf never calls me by my name. I find this strange.
Q. hi everyboby,i have a problem me and my boyfriend have been together for little over a year,the problem is he haven't said my name yet.this is very strange and driving me crazy.every time i ask him.he gives me some stupid answer.i dont know what to ...
A. 13 December 2007: I can relate to him. Calling you by your name in fact may make him distant and official, millions of people do the this and call their loved ones with other names.... (read in full...)
Is it wrong to be with a guy you get along with perfectly but he does not pay attention to your sexual needs so you obtain the pleasure elsewhere to balance your life??
Q. I am just about to cheat on my boyfriend of one year because of the lack of sex and affection from him. I am so disappointed as he is just such a nice guy and I love him so much and in any other ways he is perfect and I do not have any problems with ...
A. 13 December 2007: No it is not OK. Not ok at all. But it is also not ok that you are not getting the sexual satisfaction out of this otherwise perfect (I did not see anything perfect from what you said in him other then him being a nice guy). So you relationship is ... (read in full...)
How do I know if there's a chance she might like me?
Q. I have this friend thats a girl. Im starting to really like her because we have so much in common. We went skiing for the day together and had a great time. She also planned to go somewhere for my bday after she gets out of work. Is it possible that ...
A. 13 December 2007: It is possible she has feelings for you. Test her. For example, talk about you and her as us, and see whether she repeats the same pronoun... (read in full...)
Should I not trust her?
Q. I just need a second opinion on this one because I'm not to sure myself. My g/f is attending college and recently she had admitted to flirting with a classmate. I was very unhappy and she knew that I would be upset by them continuing to hang out....
A. 13 December 2007: What are you going to do, if you decide you cannot trust her?
Are you strong enough to leave her?
She continued flirting with him, although she perfectly knew it would make you upset. You don't know or know what will come next.
She possibl... (read in full...)
Why does knowing about her 16 previous partners bother me so much?
Q. OK I'm going through something really silly. It's bothering the hell outta me. My current gf who's 30 years old told me that she had 16 previous partners before me. I've had 7 before her. But it's bothering me a lot! The strange thing is that ...
A. 12 December 2007: I disagree with all the agony aunts here. I think a person is not only a person of NOW, but also yesterday.If I stole a meat yesterday, it is quite possible, I may be arrested today, and the meat is still in my stomach.
If I met, knew, and slep... (read in full...)
Sexual texts and secret meetings but he said they did nothing.
Q. Hi, I'm glad i found this site as ive got no one else to talk to. About a month ago my fiance of nearly 4 years an who i have 2 kids with got a new job and started sneaking around and was guarding his phone. It went on for weeks so i looked at h...
A. 12 December 2007: I think he cheated on you but at this point you want to get over it make sure it is not repeated.You want him back as fully yours, you want peace of mind. you don't want to lose him but win him. Here is my advise, as I said elsewhere.
The k... (read in full...)
My ex seems to expect me to simply be her friend after all the hurt she's caused me... But her Father died today. Now I have the chance to be a friend, but I'm worried that I may hurt myself. What can I do?
Q. Hi everyone, I posted a question earlier today, but there has been a serious and tragic twist since this morning. My girlfriend broke up with me almost 6 months ago after she decided our long distance (240 miles) relationship was too much to bear...
A. 12 December 2007: Once I had a friend (from the US) who told me this story.
They had a friend, who is an extremely nice guy, but although all of his friends (including my friends) would have girl friends all the time, he (the nice guy) would never be able to have... (read in full...)
New feature: Keyword + phrases links
Q. Hi There are over 40,000 questions here on dearcupid and some absolute gems in amongst them. Problem is it has been hard to make associations between similar questions in order to get the most out of the site. So, I've introduced a new feat...
A. 12 December 2007: Thanks Andrew,
Brilliant!!!... (read in full...)
How can I get over the stupid lies in the past and fully trust him again!!???
Q. I'm having a VERY hard time trusting my boyfriend. Last year around this time, he betrayed my trust and then a few months after that, he did it once again. There was never cheating involved, that I am aware of at least, but I don't believe there ...
A. 11 December 2007: The key to solve this problem:
1) stop checking on him
2) Never call him when he is out or away for business or any other matter
3) Lessen and shorten the call YOU make to him
4) Look very happy whenever you are together
He will be yours and ... (read in full...)
My ex seems to expect me to simply be her friend after all the hurt she's caused me... But her Father died today. Now I have the chance to be a friend, but I'm worried that I may hurt myself. What can I do?
Q. Hi everyone, I posted a question earlier today, but there has been a serious and tragic twist since this morning. My girlfriend broke up with me almost 6 months ago after she decided our long distance (240 miles) relationship was too much to bear...
A. 11 December 2007: I will tell you a lot about what I meant. Giving examples from
the life of my friends and out of my observations. I will do that gladly for you. ... (read in full...)
My ex's mixed signals are driving me insane.
Q. Basically my ex broke up with me 3 months ago. We were together for 2 years and i'd been madly in love with her for a year before we got together, when we finally did everything was amazing and she was in love with me just as much as i was with ...
A. 10 December 2007: It is not a long distance but still keeps her spending evenings out with you.
I hope you have not seen her again while in town.
But I am afraid you have contacted her already.
I can guess this because we made all these mistakes also, until we all... (read in full...)
Help me, I'm so confused!
Q. married for 10 great years .... i started a affair/ relationship with a beutiful man i now deeply love. problem being that i still love my husband...my husband has now found out and is willing to move on but i just cant imagine not having either if ...
A. 10 December 2007: Choose the lover. Because, your husband knows it and in the future, after the man gets lost from your life, and thus threat is gonna, he might remember your cheating on him and come back to this issue in a very angry manner.
Your lover knew you... (read in full...)
How do I change from a friendship to a romance?
Q. i am head over heels in love with someone. i can tell because whenever i am with her, i am happy. i love talking with her, sitting around watching a movie or juct about doing anything with her...yes even going shopping. The problem is that we are ...
A. 10 December 2007: If I were you I would just send her a rose and a letter, telling her how much you love her. Actually why dont you write to her exactly what you posted here. It is very nice, sympathetic.
And it is easier for you. I am sure, a girl who also enjo... (read in full...)
Turns out I have a daughter...
Q. Hey everyone I was with this girl for 3 years I recently found out nearly a year ago she was pregnant when we decided to seperate which she knew about. according to what she told me anywyas. she wont let me see the baby. all i know is I supposedly ...
A. 10 December 2007: I think this is the right thing to do, isn't it. It is your right, it is your daughters natural, legal and emotional right.
In fact I think it is your responsibility to make sure your kid knows her dad, and he is there for her. ... (read in full...)
Is there a meaning to these dreams?
Q. the other day i had a dream that me and girlfriend were just avout to have sex. then my girlfriends younger sister walks in. i get along with the younger sister in real life, but i dont fancy her or love ehr or anything, altho i have joked to my ...
A. 10 December 2007: We cannot control our thoughts and we cannot control our dreams. In a blink of eye so many thoughts come and pass through our minds which are not necessarily what we think. There are dreams that are mostly meaningless, and I wouldst give them any ... (read in full...)
What to do to make anal sex not painful - except for relaxation and lube? Your suggestions please?
Q. I feel anal sex kind of painful although: I use lots of lubricant,and I em very relaxed! What's wrong? Are some women never able togo through this? It is kind of painful especially in the beginning of the anal act. Any suggestions apart from lube ...
A. 9 December 2007: If it is painful, don't do it. Why do you have to do it you feel pain. No body can force you to it.
... (read in full...)
Should I tell him I am a virgin before we have sex or simply don't mention it?
Q. I have been going out with a guy recently but it is the first proper relationship I have been in. Therefore, I am still a Virgin. When the time comes, is it a good thing to tell the guy you are a Virgin before you have sex or should I just leave ...
A. 9 December 2007: Yes I definitely think that you should tell him before hand. In addition there is no harm in telling it. And when telling this fact that you are not doing just to get rid of it and you know he is the guy.
Plus it is better he is prepared what he i... (read in full...)
Should I stay married or go with my first love?
Q. I am a 22 year old married girl. i have been married for about 5 months. anyways i hate being married and a wife. i have been talking to the first guy i have loved and wanted to date the whole time i was married and before. we never stopped ...
A. 9 December 2007: Yeah. You should at once divorce your poor husband. Before you hurt him any more. You have effectively ended this marriage anyway didn't you?
But even though you felt pressured, no body actually pressured you did they? You could have said no..... (read in full...)
He says he's an atheist and therefore won't buy me a Christmas present. Should I stay with him?
Q. my boyfriend refuses to buy me a christmas present because he says he is an atheist and doesnt celebrate christmas. i have already bought him something (very nice that he has been wanting) but last night he told me he wouldnt buy christmas gifts at...
A. 9 December 2007: I am a Muslim and if you were my girl, I would love to buy you Christmas presents and I would enjoy the Christmas with you.
He is being a bigot on this, a very unnecessary attitude.
I do understand your frustration but take it as an idiosync... (read in full...)
He watches pissing porn. Should I accept it?
Q. I have found out that my boyfriend looks at pissing porn and I dont know what to do. I find it really weird and it makes me feel abit sick that he gets off on watching this. He does not understand why i am so upset and says that it is just porn on ...
A. 9 December 2007: I admit it is a bit out of step with what we regard as classical/conventional sex or fantasy.
In an ideal, natural world, no one would watch porn (we are not meant to watch it we are supposed to do it) but here we are we what we have created for ... (read in full...)
My ex seems to expect me to simply be her friend after all the hurt she's caused me... But her Father died today. Now I have the chance to be a friend, but I'm worried that I may hurt myself. What can I do?
Q. Hi everyone, I posted a question earlier today, but there has been a serious and tragic twist since this morning. My girlfriend broke up with me almost 6 months ago after she decided our long distance (240 miles) relationship was too much to bear...
A. 9 December 2007: Andy thanks for the update. Your response confirms once more that you are too nice a guy, nice and neat. It's difficult to tell what's ahead. You never know, but I'd say it's very unlikely": In my book it is a definite no, especially comin... (read in full...)
Slept with the ex...but I am not sure if it was just sex to her.
Q. So I'm very confused, and looking for some guidance... I recently slept with an ex. We had dated for a year and were planning on a long future, when we had a bad breakup and for a LONG time we weren't talking. Recently I ran into her one day...
A. 9 December 2007: Of course she wants you back mate...... (read in full...)
Our marriage is amazing but sex life is frustrating.
Q. I am in my early 20's and i have been married for 2 years. We have a great marrige, but our sex life sucks. His penis is small(like maybe 3 inches) i knew that before i married him and was willing to accept it he preforms oral sex on me and its ...
A. 9 December 2007: I understand that his penis is not only small (here size matters, ladies and gentlemen) but he jerks off aftger three stroke. that is like 3 second. Now it is a problem that many many men suffers and they hide this problem behind their huge egos. ... (read in full...)
Does he love me or is he just with me because he thinks he cant get anybody else??
Q. Okay. So I'm dating this guy and we have been dating 7 months. He thinks he's ugly and that I could do better, but gets super jealous when I even talk to another guy. Recently he asked for a 3 sum, and I'm bisexual. So of course I said yes. But why ...
A. 9 December 2007: I guess your questioning his proposal is not fully legitameteÇ
1-You said YES
2-You are Bi
3-He knew it and knowing took you as her girlfriend. So the implicit arrangement was he would not mind, or he would anticipate you sleeping with anothe... (read in full...)
Any advice on how to tell if your guy friend likes you??
Q. I need to know how to read my guy friend's signals. I have fallen head over heals for one of my guy friends. He is a super nice guy always complimenting me, always flashing me smiles, lots of quick --hold my stare eye contact, but I don't kn...
A. 9 December 2007: Normally, he would have asked you out until now, if he was genuinely interested in you as a woman also. I mean out for a dinner, romantic dinner, or movie, one on one. But he did not. May be he is too nice, may be he is gay (which I don't think) and ... (read in full...)
My ex seems to expect me to simply be her friend after all the hurt she's caused me... But her Father died today. Now I have the chance to be a friend, but I'm worried that I may hurt myself. What can I do?
Q. Hi everyone, I posted a question earlier today, but there has been a serious and tragic twist since this morning. My girlfriend broke up with me almost 6 months ago after she decided our long distance (240 miles) relationship was too much to bear...
A. 9 December 2007: You are being too nice. And I hate it whenever I see nice guys' (and girls') genuine feelings are being abused, and they are being dumped. She is not in love with, you are, she knows it, she feels it, she likes it, because it flatters her ego, she... (read in full...)
How much can she love me if she is still cheating and keeping these friendships which hurt me inside??
Q. My wife maintains mostly men as friends. They are mostly coworkers. She also had sexual affairs with some of them. Her frienships with these guys make me very uncomfotable, and she knows it. I have asked her a few times to cool down those male fri...
A. 8 December 2007: Do you think her actions are selfish? YES
Am I over reacting? NOT AT ALL
Is it finally time to leave her ? YES
... (read in full...)
My ex's mixed signals are driving me insane.
Q. Basically my ex broke up with me 3 months ago. We were together for 2 years and i'd been madly in love with her for a year before we got together, when we finally did everything was amazing and she was in love with me just as much as i was with ...
A. 8 December 2007: Well she might be looking for a new life, new guy in her mind
but her heart might be telling her otherwise. If she was madly in love with you, though, it would prevail over her mind.
And it is the distance factor also. How far is her universi... (read in full...)
My-bf and his friend have seen escorts while we were broken up. I am determined to stop our relationship. Any advice?
Q. Well I feel unbelievably jaded right now. My boyfriend and I had broken up. I broke up with him for GOOD reason. And no he hadn't cheated on me. YET. Anyways we got back together about two and half months after breaking up. Two days later I found ...
A. 8 December 2007: Why would you tell your friends about what he did...
And yes what he did is is ugly (doing with a call girl, while telling you to stay clean in the break-up and spending on her 350 USD) and he seems to be a kind of person who is not fully up to your... (read in full...)
I'm a married man but became utterly obsessed with a young co-worker. We've been friends for a while but I just can't stop thinking that I'm destined to be with her
Q. Hi, I am a married male with children, and I love my wife very much. I hired this girl (who has a boyfriend) who was almost 20 years younger than me for a 1 year term. She is extremely sociable, and has a good relationship with almost everyone she ...
A. 26 November 2007: Please give it up.I am confident you can do it. ... (read in full...)
I'm a married man but became utterly obsessed with a young co-worker. We've been friends for a while but I just can't stop thinking that I'm destined to be with her
Q. Hi, I am a married male with children, and I love my wife very much. I hired this girl (who has a boyfriend) who was almost 20 years younger than me for a 1 year term. She is extremely sociable, and has a good relationship with almost everyone she ...
A. 25 November 2007: Thank you for this very consistent, honest and sincere question. I full symptahize with your situation and I do understand you and your feelings also. Dont worry you do not need to see a thrapist. These are all human conditions. You will get over it ... (read in full...)
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