Mockery and insults are making me want to retaliate, .. but I don't want to be petty. How can I let go of my anger.
Q. I posted before regarding a now ex friend of mine and still current friend of my partners who had sent him love letters and was continuing to pursue my partner. I have now decided to move in with my partner, and asked him to tell her that I was movi...
A. 1 April 2010: I would postpone moving in with you boyfriend until you have had some straight answers regarding his refusal to remove this woman from his contacts. If she is on his msn, phone and facebook, im assuming thats so they can have contact. Why else would ... (read in full...)
I believe he never physically cheated, but things are unresolved. What should I do?
Q. Unfortunately when I was pregnant with our son my husband took it upon himself to seek out other people on craigslist and sent private pictures of himself to one of them, well I found out and confronted him. He swears that he never met with any of ...
A. 1 April 2010: Youre welcome. I hope every thing works out ok for you x... (read in full...)
I believe he never physically cheated, but things are unresolved. What should I do?
Q. Unfortunately when I was pregnant with our son my husband took it upon himself to seek out other people on craigslist and sent private pictures of himself to one of them, well I found out and confronted him. He swears that he never met with any of ...
A. 31 March 2010: The fact is, you lost your trust in him and thats not something he can regain with a few contrite conversations. It can take years to rebuild trust. Even worse that it happened at a time when you needed him to be there for you and you were probably ... (read in full...)
Will texting an ex give him hope of getting back together? That is not my intention.
Q. Hi, wonder if anyone could advise me on a recent relationship break-up. Me and my now ex bf had been dating for 2 years off and on. We had dated before that but ended things for a good year and both saw other people. When we got back together, w...
A. 31 March 2010: If you are really sure this is it and you dont want to be with him anymore, its probably best to just leave things and not contact him anymore. It seems pointless to keep responding to him if you dont want to be with him. He knows by talking to you, ... (read in full...)
Is my marriage over already?
Q. I'm 22 and married for over 1 year now and been happy through out. Of course in life we all argue with our partners once in a while and usually it will be over something petty and we learn to forgive and love each other in most occassions. N...
A. 31 March 2010: If i were you, id address your wifes issues regarding the loss of the baby and her depression. The feelings she has concerning the miscarriage can last a long time, years even. So her health should be your main priority now. Talk to her about ... (read in full...)
How can I stop losing my temper and beating my girl up?
Q. hey man i have a girl who love me so much and am also very crazy about her but any b tyme i get mad at her i beat her up but yet still she love me canu tell me how to stop cos i love my baby girl so muchits all about my temper....
A. 31 March 2010: Hitting her is a weakness you have because you arent intelligent enough to figure out another way to solve the problem. She will only put up with being hurt so many times and then she will leave you. So if you want to keep her, learn how to control ... (read in full...)
Why doesn't he ever say the big L word??
Q. Heyyy cupid! Okay so here's my issue I just can't stop thinking about. I have fallen head over heels for this boy who is a year older than me and we are both so into eachother. I am a sophomore and he's a junior. We have been dating for more tha...
A. 31 March 2010: Speak to your boyfriend and ask him if he loves you. And get him to explain what it is about you that he loves. It does sound strange that he only said it once and that was a week after you said you wouldnt have sex unless he felt the same. He may ... (read in full...)
Mockery and insults are making me want to retaliate, .. but I don't want to be petty. How can I let go of my anger.
Q. I posted before regarding a now ex friend of mine and still current friend of my partners who had sent him love letters and was continuing to pursue my partner. I have now decided to move in with my partner, and asked him to tell her that I was movi...
A. 31 March 2010: Your partner needs to stop being friends with this woman. He is the problem not her. He needs to tell her straight that hes not interested in her. And shes to leave you both alone or he will inform her partner of her behaviour. Im sure she would ... (read in full...)
14 and pregnant! Help!
Q. i think that i am pregnant and i am just 14 plz tell me how to get through this someone i really need help!!!!!!...
A. 31 March 2010: Tell your mum or a sister, someone close to you that can help. Do a pregnancy test, you can buy the kits from a chemist/pharmacy. You might not be pregnant but if the test says you are, then go to your doctor for a check up and advice about your ... (read in full...)
Why would he say that if we were ever together I would "suffocate" him?
Q. anyway last night it all went wrong i suppose i was trying to see how he felt and he turned around and said to me. "i can see you like to look after people and you do this but if we were ever together i find you would suffocate me-i was mortified ...
A. 31 March 2010: Ah bless you. Whats the guy complaining about!! Most would be happy to be looked after. You tested the water with you toe and were rebuffed because he would find being with you suffocating. Charming! Especially as you say hes happy for you to pay ... (read in full...)
Do I come clean or leave the reason for the break up as is?
Q. Okay so I have made a mess of things and I just want to try and do the best I can from the mess I've made! I've been dating this guy for about 6 months and it has been really good and I have NO complaints, this guy is almost perfect.... He has been...
A. 31 March 2010: Its best to be honest with your ex bf. He deserves that much. As you were vague with him about your reasons for splitting up with him, its understandable that he wants to talk to you. Tell him the truth, that you are trying to rebuild your marriage, ... (read in full...)
What does he mean when he says he loves me but is not sure if he is "in love" with me?
Q. i have been seeing my boyfriend for 6 years. his wife killed herself and i told him that i loved him and was in love with him. he told me that he loves me too but he is not sure if he is in love with me. he tells me everything and trusts me with his ...
A. 31 March 2010: You know the difference between being in love and loving someone as you have already told him you feel both for him. Well, he feels love for you but he doesnt think hes IN love with you. Its often the way with couples. One feels more deeply than the ... (read in full...)
He proposed but doesn't want to be seen with me in public or introduce me to his parents.
Q. me and my boyfriend studied together during our graduation programme and soon we bcame best of friends. he proposed me last yr and we had a perfect relationship for the first few months. then we had to return back to our respective cities after ...
A. 31 March 2010: He may have acted in haste by securing you with a proposal. Then when he went home, he lost the courage to tell his family what he had done. If he loved you he would want to be with you and he would want you to meet his family. I think he may have ... (read in full...)
He doesn't have morning or nocturnal erections. Is this health issue?
Q. My friend is having problems! He used to take a long time to come; he said it was because he smoked pot. Now he has quit pot and he doesn't even have nocturnal or morning erections. Can anyone explain what is going on? He is afraid of doctors....
A. 30 March 2010: Its a problem that hes afraid of doctors! They are the only ones that will have the answer to your question. Try and encourage him to go, offer to go with him and speak on his behalf if hes really scared. They wont do anything to him without his ... (read in full...)
My fiance has sexual pictues and videos of his ex girlfriends.
Q. My fiancé has several sexual videos and pictures taken with past girlfriends. I found them before and we almost broke up. He told me he would get rid of them yet one year later I see by his compter history he has them hidden on a file on his compu...
A. 30 March 2010: Hi. I know on the face of it, he has "only" hidden things regarding old girlfriends, but....
You have just realised you are about to marry someone who can lie to you, hide things and not respect your wishes. That is really worrying. It might be time... (read in full...)
I asked my partner if he was attracted to other women, now he is upset! What should I do?
Q. i ask my partner if he would be truthfull if he had attraction to othe women. he has gone mad and said he found it insulting. I feel a fool but have been lied and cheated on before. any advice...
A. 23 March 2010: Im not sure why you feel a fool. I think its human nature to ask a partner if they find others attractive. Most, if being honest, will say they find atleast some other women or men attractive. Your partners reaction sounds over the top though. But ... (read in full...)
He sends out mass texts to girls he's slept with. He thinks I'm being jealous. Please help!
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for almost a year. We also live together. About once a week, he sends out a mass texts to about ten girls. Most of them he has slept with and flirts with them. Most of these girls I have never met. To the ...
A. 23 March 2010: Hi. Its his phone equivalent of a little black book and i can understand you not liking it, especially if hes still sending out flirty messages to these girls. Hes hoping to keep himself in their minds so they wont forget him. Its an ego trip for ... (read in full...)
My husband cheated, and lied. He swears he'll never do it again, but what do I do?
Q. I was 30 yrs old and had been previously married, My now Husband was 29 and had never been married before, We fell in love and spoke of marriage and decided to set the date to be married in Sept 1988, a couple weeks before our wedding I found out I ...
A. 23 March 2010: Hello. I think you set a precedent when you forgave him for cheating with his ex. Instead of walking away, you married him.
The fact that he says he wants to be with you now is pretty poor. It should be....do you want him?! He may have been payi... (read in full...)
I want to show my love for my girlfriend, but is it odd to buy a ring for myself?
Q. Ok, my girlfriend has this necklace that she wears. Not the most expensive necklace out there (but I really could care less, it's the thought that counts) and it is engraved with my name on it. She never takes it off, except to shower, she doesn't ...
A. 23 March 2010: Hi. Im sure her parents wont find it odd that you bought a ring to signify your feelings for their daughter. Its a great idea. It shows sincerity. Go for it! ... (read in full...)
Is this normal after a break up?
Q. My sister broke up with her boyfriend because he was cheating and so I've been spending all my time with her. She's really upset and has been crying a lot so I've just being telling her I love her and taking care of her. The last couple of nights ...
A. 23 March 2010: Hi it sounds as if shes using you as a security blanket at the moment. I wouldnt be too worried about it. If you feel uncomfy with her sleeping like that and dont want to hurt her feelings. Tell her you arent sleeping very well what with sharing ... (read in full...)
His wife accepts an open relationship, but he seems to have issues with that. Should I pounce him anyway and see what happens?
Q. This is complicated. I have known this guy for bit but never really hung out all that often, just raced together a couple of times. We got together a while ago and I knew he was married so thought nothing of it. Turns out he truly just needed ...
A. 23 March 2010: He sounds as if he is still very commited to his wife and its surprising, that hes only now starting to realise his marriage is over! He may have been in denial until now. As it hits him and he prepares to move on, she might decide to stop seeing ... (read in full...)
Am I really everything he says I am?
Q. I ended a relationship a few weeks ago due 2 an abusive incident. My ex and I argued over the dumbest thing and he chose to choke, hit, and yell at me. I left him a week later with no warning or calls; just disappeared. I know leaving like that is ...
A. 23 March 2010: Hello. If he became that nasty over an arguement about something dumb, i can only imagine how much worse it would have been, had it been a row over something really serious. You werent wrong for leaving as you did and he should be grateful you even ... (read in full...)
Are we both idiots for staying in an abusive relationship?
Q. Ok, so I'm gonna summarise this a bit. Both I and my bf of 5 years are difficult people. We're both sensitive, emotional, highly-strung and easily hurt. He was abused by his mother, and I've been bullied for years. We have an awesome relationship, ...
A. 23 March 2010: Hi. If you have a strong relationship and you want to fix this problem, you certainly arent wrong for staying with him. Just be sure the reason you are together is because you love each other. And not because you feel you can act out this abuse ... (read in full...)
My partner says I am being selfish as I want to be with him all day on Valentines day because that is the day he has access to his son
Q. My partner has a 14 year old son who sees him every sunday 10.30 - 7 to be precise (not an hour less neither an hour more) and he only lives down the road so i can't see why he can't see him whenever. i work saturdays and he has his son sundays so i ...
A. 3 February 2010: You will probably leap to his defence but i get the feeling, reading between the lines. That your bf might not be as romantic as you would wish. Hence Valentines Day being a biggy for you. Thats understandable. In most relationships if they are good ... (read in full...)
How can I get off this horrible path I'm on...?
Q. i started a new school this year, and meet a guy who took advantage of me. and we went months with out talking until we started talking again and became i would say really good friends with everything forgotten. then a time came were he expressed ...
A. 3 February 2010: First of all, you arent a slut so stop thinking of yourself in those terms. Your a young person who has been seeing someone who took advantage of you. How does he lead you into doing these things? Think about it a little. Are you scared he will tell ... (read in full...)
Fiance just doesn't seem to want sex! Instead watches porn and takes care of himself!!!
Q. I am a 25 year old, my fiance really doesn't seem interested in me in bed. He kisses me all the time grabs my butt but just really doesn't seem interested in sex! Just recently I found out that he has been wathcing porn on the computer. He is 38 so ...
A. 3 February 2010: Talk to him. You need to know why hes not interested. Hes obviously got sexual urges if hes watching porn, so ask why he doesnt show them when hes with you. You really have to talk to him as he holds all the answers x... (read in full...)
How do we deal with people who are jealous/envious of us?
Q. My partner and I are in an age gapped relationship. I am the older woman, 38 and he is the younger, 21. We have been together for 3 1/2 years now and have never been so much in love! I left my disfunctional marriage to be with him. I have 2 children ...
A. 3 February 2010: At the end of the day his family should be glad that hes happy and leave it at that. They sound a little disfunctional if you dont mind me saying. Theres an age gap between myself and my partner but luckily they are all ok. If i were in your positon ... (read in full...)
Considering dating an older woman...
Q. I am a college student and I am really not attracted to any girls I know personally or for that matter my recent and distant past. I have joined an online dating site, and have considered dating an older woman. I have just turned 23. My question...
A. 3 February 2010: A relationship is built on many things not just age or bank balance. Lots of younger guys like older women just as a lot of younger women like older men. So try it and see. My partner is 15 years younger then me and we get along fine. While my ex ... (read in full...)
Should I be concerned about this discharge?
Q. I started on the birth control patch a few weeks ago. I was suppose to have my period January 17-ish, but I started a week before my period was suppose to come, so I didn't get it until this week. So I didn't have my period at all in January. Toda...
A. 3 February 2010: Hi. Im sure theres nothing to be scared about. The patch will be bringing changes to your body and things can happen. Just pop along to your doctor for a chat. Its always better to get things checked properly x... (read in full...)
I know I won't ever be loved like she will love me.
Q. Hello, im pretty new to the whole "post your problems online" scene, but I've never loved a girl like this in my life and any kind of help/advice would be appreciated. Well it starts out like this. About 2 years ago I met a girl online. We talked a ...
A. 3 February 2010: You say you are a very closed person and needed your space and time around Christmas. Whatever happened, it sounds as if something change her feelings towards you during that time as she suggested breaking up. Agreeing to break up with her probably ... (read in full...)
Is there more to him texting this girl than meets the eye?
Q. Me and my boyfriend been together for almost a year Now. I love him so much. He means the world to me. But we constantly argue, he says horrible things to me when we do. He apologizes but does it again. This the first time in my life I put up with ...
A. 3 February 2010: CaringGuy has said it all. Yes there probably is more to him texting her than you know about. The fact hes ready to deny it when youve seen the evidence yourself, proves hes a liar. We also know hes a verbal bully. And hes controlling. What hes done ... (read in full...)
I waited 3 months for a dinner reservation in a top restaurant and my bf has just cancelled out. Is it ok to take another man to not miss out on the dining experience?
Q. A while back I booked a table at the supposedly best restaurant in the UK and it took me 3 months and a cancellation to get in. My b/f has known about it for weeks and how excited I am about it. Today he texts me to say that the mother of his child ...
A. 3 February 2010: Where children are concerned....thems the breaks! Either ask your boyfriend to get a sitter or take your mum or a gal pal. If you go with another man it will cause all sorts of problems. Your boyfriend might think you went with another man out of ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend of 16 months continuously sends friend requests to models, adult film stars, etc. Should I be worried?
Q. Does anyone have any insight or advice about this: my boyfriend of 16 months continuously sends friend requests to models, adult film stars, etc. He doesn't know these women personally. I am a little concerned, and wonder if I should be worried ...
A. 3 February 2010: I wouldnt worry too much about his requests to these women. Adding the attractive next door neighbour would be more of a worry! His interest in adding models and film stars sounds more of a fantasy thing than a real problem. The ones that do accept ... (read in full...)
Why does he make sexual comments to me if he doesn't want to have sex with me?
Q. I have a friend of about one year. At first there was a little romance and a little sex but that all cooled by his choice because 1) I have herpes and 2) I am menopausal and he wants children (he is 15 yrs younger than me). I can clearly see his ...
A. 3 February 2010: Hi. You may find its how he chats online to women and at times he forgets what hes saying and who hes saying it too. Its a refection on him not you, so try not to be offended by him. If you like him alot, you will just have to be very patient and ... (read in full...)
I feel like I'm missing out!
Q. Here goes, im 36 years old, have a daughter who is ten and me and her dad split up when she was six monthes. It took a long time to get over him, stopped crying every night for four years and since then i have dated every once in a while, slept with ...
A. 12 January 2010: You have put your education and your daughters well being before anything else. You are fantastic! A degree and a beautiful, intelligent daughter. You should be VERY proud of yourself. Who knows how you or your daughter might have turned out if you ... (read in full...)
I've slept with one person, and been with him for 3 years. Yet I think I have herpes!
Q. Hey everybody. Im seventeen years old and going through a tough time. About two years ago me an my boyfriend of 3 years slept with each other for the first time, and have been sleeping together since, at first using condoms and then after a...
A. 11 January 2010: Hello. I think you are getting in a state when you dont need to. It sounds like thrush. Make an appointment with your doctor as soon as possible. You can ask for a lady doctor. She will soon tell you whats going on and get you sorted out. Youre ... (read in full...)
Can a labia majora be docked?
Q. my best friend has a quite big labia majora and a friend of us suggested her that she should put a rubber round it so it can cut out(docked),like people do it on dog's tails.is that ok?i am worried about her......
A. 11 January 2010: Good life! NO. It is definately NOT ok for her to do this to herself. If she feels there is a problem, then she should go and seek a medical opinion. Did you post here on this subject a few days ago? Labia come in all sizes, there isnt a `normal` ... (read in full...)
Scared of Anal sex?
Q. I'm 19. I've been with my boyfriend for just over a year, and I've built up this barrier in our sex life. I'm afraid to have anal sex, so much so that I've made him believe I can't have it or I'll freak out. I know he had anal sex in his previous ...
A. 11 January 2010: Its a shame this issue has caused you to build up a barrier. Do i take it that its an ongoing issue for him that you dont like anal sex? He probably hasnt even had it before. Lots proclaim to have had and done things they dont really have a clue ... (read in full...)
Am I just the rebound girl?
Q. So after months of asking to see me again, I decided to go on another date with a guy I saw over the summer. We were only seeing each other (not serious), but he ended things when an ex came back in the picture. I knew he liked me (and still does). ...
A. 11 January 2010: You arent his rebound girl really. It sounds as if he regards you more as a friend. Hes obviously still stuck on her. If he wants to take things further with you, just bare in mind he is a bit of a risk regarding his ex because he still loves her. ... (read in full...)
Was he just using me to get over her?
Q. My boyfriend chased after me for four months. I was never really sure whether I truely liked him or not and was still trying to figure things out so when he asked me out during those months. I said no, three times. I wanted to be fair to him and ...
A. 11 January 2010: He must have liked you to have pursued you for months. You say during that time you were cool and turned him down a few times. Interesting. Men like a challenge.
Then you decided you liked him and while you dated him, you became `super atta... (read in full...)
Possibly dying...what would you do?
Q. I am a 49 yr old woman who reconnected with 2 men on Facebook. They are best friends. Have not seen both since High school. Both were interested back then I am still "attractive" and athletic. Sam is the guy of interest. John is his best friend. S ...
A. 10 January 2010: Hi. I can understand how you might be perplexed by the turn of events. But if i were you, i would take a back seat for a while. Try not to second guess things. I share a house with my ex but we certainly arent in a relationship. Having said that, i ... (read in full...)
Hes giving signals that he likes me but he is shy...any tips?
Q. hello, please someone tell me what to do , I like this guy so much he is in my class but he doesn't talk much he is so shy BUT he is giving me signs that he likes me back, I just can't go and talk to him, because, well, I m shy too; and this is ...
A. 10 January 2010: Have you a favourite book? If so, lend the book to him and recommend that he reads it. A few days later ask if hes started reading it yet and just have a general chat. Be bold and take it from there. Good luck... (read in full...)
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