Are all my friends lying to me?
Q. Alright, I've been with this group of people that I thought were my friends, we use to go out every now and then, have beer and do some dumb stuff, like all friends do. My problem at that time was that I didn't have a car, so I was asking any of ...
A. 14 June 2010: You're welcome. Hope things work out ok. ... (read in full...)
So she was with another guy...now I am starting to WANT her to cheat
Q. *OP's Original Title* I told the story in my last post...I am 42, she is 27, recently married...together about 2 years. We had separated for about 2 weeks last fall and i recently found out she had sex with a 22 year old guy during that period. ...
A. 12 June 2010: Yes you are. As a woman i know if i became emotionally interested in another man it would be because i was attracted to him! And i would run towards him, not away from him! Common sense should tell you thats also the sort of guy your wife would run ... (read in full...)
Are all my friends lying to me?
Q. Alright, I've been with this group of people that I thought were my friends, we use to go out every now and then, have beer and do some dumb stuff, like all friends do. My problem at that time was that I didn't have a car, so I was asking any of ...
A. 12 June 2010: Hello. You dont need to feel guilty. S*it happens. They just werent the good friends you thought they were. I cant help thinking the guy that bought the beer is stirring the pot. Its easy to see how he would have been annoyed. He gets a message ... (read in full...)
Fiance expects me to be ok with her relationship with her ex, and I'm NOT ok!
Q. My fiance broke off a friendship with her ex last year after I came out and we realized things were serious between us. While I was in Arizona handeling legal matters She called and said that the owner had rehired him to the company we both work for ...
A. 12 June 2010: Hi. It was wrong of her not to tell you he was back with the company and she was out playing golf with him. I suppose she cant really control who her boss hires but she doesnt have to partake in leisure activities with her ex. It sounds as if shes ... (read in full...)
How can I help my depressed homesick boyfriend?
Q. my live in bf seems to be depressed and upset about work and homesick from Ga. We have been having problems in our relationship.. financial, and his unwillingness to propose though he let me know he bought a ring over 4 months ago. He's moody an...
A. 12 June 2010: Hi. Relieve some of the pressure on him by putting marriage to one side for the moment. Also if hes depressed, sex wont be available for a while but try not to take it personally. He needs to go see a doctor because he does sound very depressed. He ... (read in full...)
How can I get back together with my ex-girlfriend?
Q. My girlfriend and myself broke up over small issue, that really has to do with other people more so than us. I would really like to get back together with her. It's been about 3 weeks, and I was wondering how long should I wait to contact her? Also, ...
A. 12 June 2010: If you really want her back i wouldnt wait too long. Its best to talk to her and tell her how much you love her, say how sorry you are about the break up and ask if you could meet to talk. I hope it works.... (read in full...)
What do you do when you never let them know how you felt?
Q. He liked me for a year and I started to like him back (this was last year). He showed it by staring at me in class often and trying to talk to me, but I was just so shy and never showed much interest back. Time passed and my feelings grew; I...
A. 12 June 2010: Hi. As you can see. If you are too shy you will lose lots of opportunities. Having said that he could have done more than just stare! Some would have found that quite intimidating. Im guessing he must be quite shy too. Do you have a friend that ... (read in full...)
Mind games, or not?
Q. hi i have been away from the lady i still love for just under a year. we had 2 kids they are aged 8 and 6. she keeps saying she loves me but not in love with me. she has been seeing some guy for 4 mounths. did she love me or did she only say this to ...
A. 12 June 2010: Hello. You havent given much background to go on but im sure she did love you. She says she still does. Its obviously just not a strong enough love to make her want to be with you. Its sometimes very difficult to accept things are done and move on ... (read in full...)
Is taking a paternity test of my brother's child crossing the line? I have evidence to suggest his girlfriend has been lying for 7yrs!
Q. Okay this is a weird story and question but here it goes. When my brother was 16 he got this girl pregnant and she was 22 at the time (which i find very gross). No one in my family knew the child or even the girl for that matter existed until the ...
A. 11 June 2010: Hi. Im not sure you could even have a DNA test done. Its really between your brother and his ex. I can understand you feeling angry that this older woman led him astray at an early age and brough so much trouble. But you have to remember your ... (read in full...)
His low self-esteem is ruining our sex life!
Q. I've been with the same boyfriend for over a year. Over the past few months, our sex drive has steeply decline to where we barely kiss or even hug anymore. Tonight in talking about it he admitted that one of the reasons for this is because he do...
A. 11 June 2010: Hmm. Well trying to bolster his ego isnt working very well if hes now directing his discontent towards you too! Tell him to stop eating pies if hes not happy with his shape! As hes kindly pointed out that hes also unhappy with your tum, do as ... (read in full...)
I so confused of who I am, I'm sure I'm not gay but people say I might be bi!
Q. So heres the thing i have a gay friend pritty much tried for years to convince me im "bi" or maybe even "gay" i mean my n my friend goofed around and went skinny dipping but i couldint even stand the thought of looking and thier ass hell in ...
A. 11 June 2010: This gay friend is playing mind games and messing with your head. Whether hes gay or not isnt the issue. Hes just not a very nice person and you need to drop him from your life. He is not being a friend to you. If the thought of being with a guy ... (read in full...)
I love him too much to leave but I am worried I will resent him for not wanting kids!
Q. I have been with my partner now for two years. he has 2 kids from a previous marraige, i have 2 but they are grown up and at uni.i had them young and my marriage didnt work out, i brought them up on my own. I have moved in with him into his hou...
A. 11 June 2010: Hello. If hes always made his position clear you have to respect that. Many many people look forward to the time when their children are grown and they can start a new chapter in life, doing the things they want to do. During their second bloom they ... (read in full...)
He has a foot fetish but I cannot stand anyone touching my feet! How can I get him to stop?
Q. my boyfriend has a foot fetish and i hate feet or people touching my feet, it makes me feel sick and he keeps trying to tickle my feet and i have tried to tell him that i dont like it but i dont just want to say it really direct but it aint getting ...
A. 11 June 2010: As others have said, you should really have been up front at the start and told him. You say you dont mind as long as its not your feet but would you really be ok with him lavishing attention on other girls feet? Having said that, hes rather silly ... (read in full...)
My voice sounds like a female's voice! Is there a solution for this?
Q. i am 24 years male, when i am talking on the phone every one understands my voice like female on phone and my friends also told that my voice sounds like female voice.is there a solution for this problem to change my voice into male voice...
A. 11 June 2010: Hi. Find a voice coach and have your voice trained. It might be an expense but its an investment if a high pitched voice is making you feel unhappy. ... (read in full...)
Demanded my boyfriend gets a paternity test on a potential child..am I in the wrong?
Q. Am I wrong for tell my boyfriend that we won't live together or take any big steps in our relationship until he gets a dna test on a child he doesn't know is his or not? We've been together for almost a year....
A. 11 June 2010: You are right to ask for a test. If he is the father he will have certain responsibilities towards the child, vsits, child support and years of regular contact with his ex. Its quite a biggy, so you need to know now rather than later. I think you ... (read in full...)
Mentally abusive, financially abusive, intimidating, threatening, hitting
Q. I have been married for 24 years, and have 4 children 27 years, 23 years, my 17 year old and my 11 year old daughter's live at home. My husband has become so abusive that I do not know him any longer, nor do I trust him. I found out he has a ma...
A. 11 June 2010: Hi. Go to your doctor and explain how you feel and why. If your husband lays a finger on you again, you call the police out to him and have him charged with assault. Meantime either find a friend who will take you and your youngest daughter in. Or ... (read in full...)
I have tried to explain to him my needs but he just doesn't catch on.
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for almost two years. When I first started dating him I was dealing with a lot of issues from a sexual assault and being really self conscience about anything sexual. I didn't enjoy anything he did to me no matter how ...
A. 11 June 2010: Hi. Well done for working towards recovery! If your boyfriend is out of practice, its understandable. Why not try a 69 and make that the norm for a while rather than just giving him a bj. That way you wont feel neglected while hes having fun. And ... (read in full...)
My wife no longer wants to have any physical contact with me...
Q. I have been with my wife for 14 years. we married close to 2 years ago. She no longer wants to have any physical contact with me. I hug her now and then, kiss her goodbye for work and at times initiate sex only to be pushed away or even kicked or ...
A. 11 June 2010: Hello. If there havent been any major problems between you, apart from this. Then maybe she is just no longer attracted to you but enjoys the security of being with you. Being slapped or kicked away ISNT a normal healthy relationship. I would ask ... (read in full...)
Opinions on curved dicks?
Q. Hey, I've seen this question argued before, but what do women think about curved dicks? I mean, I have one.. it starts out straight, then has a gradual curve downward, about 45 degrees. Is that a problem? I guess I can point it up, but the curve ...
A. 10 June 2010: It shouldnt stop you doing anything. Infact in some positions it will be an advantage for your partner! The design wont bother the girls. Google penis shape and you will see they really do come in all shapes and sizes.... (read in full...)
Why wont my husband accept I just don't enjoy anal?
Q. My husband is obsessed with anal sex. We've had it twice. He refused to use any lubricant and it hurt very badly. I told him that I'm not interested in doing it again. I only did it with him because I felt pressured. His female boss is ...
A. 9 June 2010: I agree with everyone else. He should NOT be talking about your private life with a woman at work. If he did! He sounds a regular manipulator, coercing you into doing things by making you feel inadaquate.Thats not love...or making love! He may have ... (read in full...)
Should I keep ignoring an online casanova?
Q. I just stopped talking to a guy online because I realized he's a total womanizer, talking to lots of other girls as well as me and giving them the same lines. I've still got his email address. I'm tempted to email him one more time to tell him ...
A. 9 June 2010: Hi. He may have upset you alot and you want to vent. But resist the temptation to get in touch. You wouldnt be saying anything new! Im sure you arent the only.one hes upset. But hes happy and will be busy with all the other little moths fluttering ... (read in full...)
My sister's tragic death and my parents' misdirected blame at my bestman for it are causing me strife
Q. My friend was lived with my sister for three years. My parents never liked him and gave my sister a lot of problems over him. My poor sister died of a heart attack. It was tragic. She died in her sleep right next to him. He was asleep and ...
A. 9 June 2010: Hello. Im very sorry to hear about your sister. It must have been an awful shock for you all. Its normal not to cry after such an event. Sometimes tears come later. Sometimes they never come at all. If you feel you arent adjusting well then do try ... (read in full...)
How do I know whether to believe my fiance?? I found 100's of porn and dating sites, but he blames a virus!
Q. Well basicly last night i accidently stumbled across porn that had been viewed on the computer...I had to know where it had come from so i looked and it was from my fiances acount...hoping i'd made a mistake i checked again and to my horror found ...
A. 9 June 2010: Hello. Google anything ordinary. If porn sites pop up then the pc is infected with a virus. If the pc is running normally and nothing to do with porn appears, then there isnt a virus. ... (read in full...)
Are the good days worth the bad ones?
Q. My boyfriend is becoming a jerk. Hes getting on facebook a lot changing his password and talking to some of his exes. Im not mad at all about it but hes lieing to me when i ask. I dont know if this is a sign but im scared to find out. I confronted ...
A. 9 June 2010: Hello. No the good days arent worth the bad days. If he lies to you and hits you and hes sneaky on FB and talking to his ex's, then hes not worth the bother. You say you have been with him for ten months but only the first couple of months were ... (read in full...)
My wife left me and I want her back
Q. I want my wife back even though she has had an affair for 5 months. We have a 4 year old daughter, and she says she is in love with the other guy. She told me she loves me, but she is not in love with me. She told me she misses the family aspect ...
A. 9 June 2010: Hi. If you recognize a lot of the problems in the marriage were a direct result of your behaviour and you have changed, thats a start. You cant make her love you again but you can be a stand up guy and prove to her you are worth a second chance! ... (read in full...)
He gives his ex all of his money and forgets about me and his son!
Q. hey, i need some advice please, me and my fiance have been together for 2yrs, we have a 5month old son. the problem is he doesnt provide much for him. ok, he buys milk and food for our son but all the materialistic things (cot, bouncer, feeding...
A. 8 June 2010: Im not sure if you are in the UK or not but if you are, Google the CSA and use their calculator to figure out how much he should be paying towards his daughters up keep. Anything hes giving above that amount is voluntary. And he wont end up in ... (read in full...)
Am I doing the right thing?
Q. Please help. I've been in a relationship with the same guy now for several years, but it never seems to be leading anywhere. I find it difficult to discuss our future with him. He's so laid back about it.. like we have unlimited time.. but I'm...
A. 8 June 2010: You are in the driving seat of this relationship and things will only happen if you insist, because hes laid back and happy to leave things to you and his mum. Its natural for you to want a career and family and the clocks starting to tick! You ... (read in full...)
Shocked he reacted this way! What happened?
Q. I've been seeing this guy for almost 6 months. We've gotten close enough to talk about moving in together. Last Friday, I was at his house, we were sitting outside talking. Having a few drinks. He starting asking questions about my past. ...
A. 8 June 2010: Hi. I wondered, because you said you knew things were heading for unstable ground when he asked about your ex bf's. I thought maybe he had issues in that area. If hes suddenly turned from talking about sharing a home with you, to telling you to ... (read in full...)
I am scared my boyfriend is going to rape me? Or become abusive?
Q. [Moderator's Note: OP's own title] I am 13. So is my boyfriend.. I am about 8 months older. And he asked me to make out with him. And I said no, I personally think its gross. And he answered, "Why?" To me tongues are NASTY. "I will make you try ...
A. 8 June 2010: The next time he starts talking like that just say "Stop" in a loud firm voice. People read your body language and if you appear timid or scared, the wrong type of people pick up on that and will try to bully you into things. You are the boss of ... (read in full...)
Could my friend have HIV?
Q. I need help for my friend. She has been dating with this guys for 4 months. Now they're broke up cause she found out he's using drug. (like cocain, weed, rock) everything. She's honest and clean girl. She don't really know him for long time. That's ...
A. 8 June 2010: Hi. People dont get HIV just because they use drugs. If her ex boyfriend got the all clear following his std check, your friend is probably fine. I imagine having only known him a few months she was practising safe sex anyway. To put her mind at ... (read in full...)
A pimple? Or something else?
Q. Hello, Ive noticed i have a bump on the underneath my shaft, about halfway up. Its underneath the skin, and at first i thought it might be a pimple forming because it was small and hurt a bit, but now it has gotten bigger, but no whitehead has ap...
A. 8 June 2010: Hello. It could be an abscess. But there really isnt any way of knowing. You need to get it looked at properly so pop along to your doctor x... (read in full...)
Shocked he reacted this way! What happened?
Q. I've been seeing this guy for almost 6 months. We've gotten close enough to talk about moving in together. Last Friday, I was at his house, we were sitting outside talking. Having a few drinks. He starting asking questions about my past. ...
A. 8 June 2010: To date him for 6 months and be told to leave like that... is very odd. Had there been problems with your ex? Was he bad for you? Had you made a promise not to have any contact with him? You say you could see where things were heading when he ... (read in full...)
Why don't I have the courage to leave him?
Q. last year my life turned up side down my husband of 15 years started using drugs I thought i can help him but i don't think his worth all the trouble. why don't i have the courage to leave him. when i try to leave it very very hard ...
A. 8 June 2010: Helping any kind of addict is exhausting. Trying to help one that doesnt want to quit an addiction can be soul destroying. The last year or so has probably left you shell shocked and hardly in a position to leave your husband and start a new life! I ... (read in full...)
I betrayed a confidence; how do I bring it up?
Q. I've got a very good friend that happens to be a lot younger than me. He's in his twentys and I am in my in my fortys. I don't consider him a kid but as as someone on my own level. I am acquainted with his mother who is actually closer to my ...
A. 5 June 2010: I think you just have to step up to the plate and explain to him what youve just said here. If you are sure its only a matter of time until it gets back to him, its better to be honest about it now, rather than get found out. Tell him you had good ... (read in full...)
My husband thinks I cheat; why don't I just do it?
Q. I´ve been married for nine years but together for 16. Since the beginning of our marriage, and because of our personalities we´ve fought often but have remained together (this mostly because before we got married I cheated on him once, and he found...
A. 5 June 2010: Hello. It may be tempting to cheat when theres a third party ready to listen and you find them attractive too! But remember hes also going through a lot of bother at the moment. And he may just be seeing you are a companion in misery. Once hes ... (read in full...)
Sore throat, swollen, glands, fever etc after HIV scare - cause for concern??
Q. Unexpectedly and very regretfully I briefly had unprotected anal sex with another guy (I'm gay). I went straight to the doctor who thought the risk was exceptionally low on account of the person, the time, just the once and because HIV and other ...
A. 5 June 2010: Hi. Im sure you are ok but never the less, it was extremely irresponsible your doctor to use guess work! Id bypass him and go along to your nearest STD clinic.... (read in full...)
Felt completely excluded among my b/f's colleagues; they made me feel like a loser
Q. Hi guys! This is a social-relationship question, and I appreciate all comments and suggestions :) Last night I joined my boyfriend and a few of his work colleagues at a bar in the city for "Friday night drinks". I wish I stayed at home! ...
A. 5 June 2010: Im sorry but Johns work mates sound complete bores and lack the social graces. Had you been drinking you wouldnt have noticed it so much. They were just in their tight little watercooler circle. I wouldnt avoid the next invitation. Go but let John ... (read in full...)
Will I ever love him again?
Q. My husband had an affair...3 years ago..he is trying everything to make it up to me.... I just can't find the passion anymore, will I ever love this man again..?? He keeps telling me I will love him the same way just needs some time....Im lost.. :...
A. 5 June 2010: Bless you, what a miserable position to be in. And doesnt it irritate you when they say give it time and you will love them again. The confidence they have!! My partner let me down very badly. And then worked hard at being loving and trustworthy. ... (read in full...)
Says he wants me back but won't leave her
Q. {Moderator note: edited for punctuation and such} Me and my husband seperated in January of this year cause of somehthing i supposly done but havent. But he was telling me he wanted to get back together that he missed me and our kids. So well i f...
A. 5 June 2010: Hi. First you need to decide if he left you because he genuinely believed you had done something wrong or because he wanted an excuse to leave. Leaving a wife and family is a huge thing to do. And it sounds as if he did that on a whim. Which makes ... (read in full...)
What is it with men and pride????
Q. My boyfriend and I of two years - he lived with me for 1.5 years... We were perfect for each other.. We had our share of ups and downs but seriously we were the couple that everyone envied.. both attractive and totally lovey dovey smitten with ...
A. 5 June 2010: Hi. What is all his money being spent on? If he is earning a good salary he shouldnt be broke all the time. This conversation had to take place at some point because he is being financially foolish! And unless he gets his spending under control, he ... (read in full...)
Am I really that selfish?
Q. Hello! I am 48 years old, separated for 18 months, divorced for 2 months. My older daughters, 31 and 29 are both married and have children of their own. I was married twice. My daughters were from my first marriage, my second marriage lasted 20 ...
A. 30 May 2010: Hello. You say your girls were attached to their stepdad. After 20 years thinking of him as dad, its understandable they have some loyalty to him. Also i dont know how far you went to protect them from the unhappiness you felt during you marriage. ... (read in full...)
Does she deserve a second chance
Q. There is a long history to this story, but I'll keep it as short as possible. If it's long, I'm sorry but this is really killing me. I have dated a girl for 15 years on and off...since 8th grade. We became very close and i knew she was the one ...
A. 29 May 2010: Hi. It sounds as if you've travelled a long hard road to get this far. You BOTH slept with other people during breaks. And you didnt lose your virginity with the "one" either. If shes really what you want, dont find fault. Put the past firmly behind ... (read in full...)
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