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... Send *um2be a private message | | | *um2be's profile:i am 15 and expecting my first baby. I love helping people and am fairly qualified since i have been through a lot of the problems listed on the site and have got through them. I am over all quite a happy person and enjoy life to the full.
i live in Kent, UK, and enjoy sports etc. (God, i feel like im on a dating site!!!)
I am currently in a relationship, and am very happy, although the baby is not my current boyfriends.
hope u guys are all happy! |
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What exactly does foreplay consist of ?
Q. what kind of stuff is included in foreplay? im a virgin but have a bf he always rubs me to be honest i dont always come, but fake it for him, or after 5 mins he stops cos he knows i wont come, but wen i do, i sometimes get a burning sensation and i ...
A. 28 March 2007: I can't say much about the burning sensation you have... maybe an infection? But as for foreplay, it is exactly what the name suggests... playing before sex. This can invlove touching, kissing, licking, playing games, dressing up, whatever turns you ... (read in full...)
Gals, if you just meet a man who turns you on, would you have sex with him right away?
Q. Women: If a man you meet is extremely good looking or just turns you on, under “any circumstances” you will you have sex with him? One example: I picked up a gal I was sitting next to in a restaurant (at the bar) that told me later I would no...
A. 28 March 2007: It depennds on the person, but, if i was not pregnant, i would likely have sex on a first or second date if i liked the guy... it depends on what i was looking for at the time... if i was looking for a relationship, then no, you would have to wait ... (read in full...)
I really did like her until she got all insecure in bed!
Q. i'm a guy that likes to have fun. i'm young but i'm pretty mature for my age so i like to date older women for the experience. when i finally met this girl my own age i started to really like her because of her personality and she was beautiful but ...
A. 28 March 2007: Do you know that much about her? She may have been through some kind of trauma in her life that makes it hard for her to feel confident about her body. As well as this, she may fear pregnancy... i am 15, got too confident in the bedroom (Because of ... (read in full...)
I'm 19 and all I think of is sex, sex, sex!! What should I do?
Q. hi i am 19 years old and i have a problem. im seriously interested in sex and i think of sex and sex and sex only. how can i get relieved as im being attracted to every1 and i think i have to maintain a relationship.any suggestions?...
A. 28 March 2007: Every bloke your age thinks of sex non stop.... it's just most are too immature to admit it!
You do not make it clear whether you have a girlfriend or not, but if you do, then go ahead and have major fun!
If you dont, then you should think carefull... (read in full...)
I'm pregnant and when I masturbate...is the mild ache in my lower stomach a sign of something wrong?
Q. I'm 9 Weeks pregnet with my first child. I used my vibrator (not going in) to plesure myself but when I have an orgrasm it feels like it normally does but its accompanied by a mild ache in my lower stomach. Is this a sign that it could have hurt me ...
A. 28 March 2007: This is perfectly noraml, as it is just Braxton Hicks contractions. They should be painless, althouhg with sexual excitment they can become quite painful... if they get too much, just have a lie down and relax for a bit, then they will go away.
g... (read in full...)
Sex is hurting him! To the point of bleeding! What can we do to help this ?
Q. I am having a little trouble in the bedroom! i lost my virgity to my boyfriend 2 months ago. But it hurts him to have sex with me! he has a large penis could this be why? he says it is like "having sex with sandpaper" is there anyway i could loosen ...
A. 28 March 2007: The only thing i can suggest in a situation like this, if you want to loosen yourself up, is to try playing with some toys... it can spice up your love life, and will stretch you out a little, so it is not so uncomfortable for him.
Maybe slip... (read in full...)
My health is at risk! Please help!
Q. http://www.dearcupid.org/question/ive-had-sex-with-a-woman-for-the.html) I wrote a question about my girlfriend who has an off putting fishy smelling vagina. Ok well I asked if it was normal to smell like that and I have done my reasearch an...
A. 27 March 2007: Firstly, you should make sure that you have got your facts right... don't go telling her she's definately got this unless you are sure. Secondly, why are you shaggin* her if you have only known her 2 weeks?
Thirdly, if you do feel close enough for ... (read in full...)
Im due to meet my fiance's family, Im American breed, they are British, I want to make a good impression, whats the expected etiquette?
Q. I'm meeting my fiance's family for the first time. They're British and live in London and we'll staying at their house for a week. I know this could sound silly, but I was born and raised in America in a family where "proper" etiquette wasn't ...
A. 22 March 2007: The best thing you can do is be yourself. Dont try too hard, and the parents will definately know whether you are being yourself or not. The thing the parents will be worrying about most is whether or not you are the right amch for their child, and ... (read in full...)
What attracts you to a man? What do you look for in a man?
Q. Dear Ladys What attracts you to a man? What do you look for in a man? Thanks...
A. 22 March 2007: A man needs to be funny, smart and have a love for life. If things go wrong, he needs to be able to bounce up again and take it all on the chin. He would need to be happy, as this makes those around him happy. He would need to be caring and ... (read in full...)
How do you tell your guy that you're pregnant?
Q. Well... I have a boyfriend and we have only slept together twice since we got together a month ago but at the moment I'm late and thinking I may be pregnant. I know its sounds silly worrying now before I have even done a test, but how do you tell ...
A. 22 March 2007: How you tell him really depends on how you think he will react... If you think he will blow his head, then talking to him, perhaps in front of a trusted friend is a good idea.
If you think he will be supportive, then you could tell him by show... (read in full...)
Wondering about child custody issues. What is the law with children that are born out of wedlock?
Q. Hi, Ive been searching the net for single woman rights. Does anyone know the law with children that are born out of wedlock? I am 6 months pregnant, my boyfriend has just left me, and although I think he is prepared to pay maintenance, does he have ...
A. 21 March 2007: It does not matter if your partner wants to pay custody or not... if you want or need him to, he has a leagal duty. Unfortunatley, unless you feel you or your baby would be in danger by him having contact with you, he is entitled to contact. If you ... (read in full...)
Was this bit meant to rip when I had sex ? Please help!!!
Q. Ok I broke my virginity a few weeks ok with my bf and it was a bit sore but no blood or anything. But at the weekend there we had sex and he was worried he was gonna loose his hard on after putting a condom on so he pushed inside me before i was ...
A. 21 March 2007: if you are concerned, visit your doc, but to help with the weeing, do some pelvic floor exercises...
the best one to do is to pull in your pelvic muscles... like your trying not to wee and poo at the same time... and count to three... then pull them... (read in full...)
Was this bit meant to rip when I had sex ? Please help!!!
Q. Ok I broke my virginity a few weeks ok with my bf and it was a bit sore but no blood or anything. But at the weekend there we had sex and he was worried he was gonna loose his hard on after putting a condom on so he pushed inside me before i was ...
A. 20 March 2007: Your bf was out of order... he would not loose his hard on! It is normal to bleed for a day or two, but i dont fully understand what you mean when you mention 'the hole where you pee from'...what spongey bit are you referring too... childbirth ... (read in full...)
I don't want to hold him back but I don't want to lose him.
Q. Hi, this might be sort of long, I'm sorry. I am 18 years old and I’m going to be a freshman in college (in the United States ) in about 5 months. Two years ago while I was on vacation in the UK , I met a guy. We liked each other a lot, so we decided ...
A. 20 March 2007: I can see that your confused... You need to think about your self for a mo... can you do the whole long distance thing? How will you know if you are going to be faithful to him in another country if you do?
I think, instead of leaving him in the ... (read in full...)
We had sex and it hurt a little... would me being on top help?
Q. I had sex for the first time with my boyfriend and it ended up hurting a lot. He was a perfect gentleman and asked me many times if I was okay and we didn't keep going because he was afraid of hurting me more than he already was. He had wanted me to ...
A. 20 March 2007: There more you have sex, the less it will hurt anyway, so if you try different positions, and find the one that suits you, then you are likely to find it hurts less each time anyway. Use the lube your bf bought, as this will help, and most ... (read in full...)
Im 16 hes 20, I really like him, but could he only be after sex ?
Q. Hi i know this is going to sound really stupid and normaly im ok with it but theres this boy i like and he likes me im 16 and hes 20 i dont know why but i think hes too old for me or just wanting sex my mates all think i should go for it but i still ...
A. 19 March 2007: I am in the same situation, cept' i am a year younger... i am 15, he is 19... and he does not just want sex, so if you and him would be compatible, then go for it!!!
If however, you do not feel comfortable going with him, then don't get with him.... (read in full...)
I want him back and I love him so much, but I broke it off as he always ends up hurting me!!
Q. I finished with my boyfriend but now I want him back. The reason we finished is because he was always hurting me in some way and everytime I would forgive him and take him back. It felt like he thought he could get away with anything and I would ...
A. 19 March 2007: You need to let this guy know for sure that he can't treat women this way, otherwise he will always try to be domineering. Stick to your guns... i know it may be hard, but you will thank yourself for it in the long run as you wont get hurt by him ... (read in full...)
Im 15 hes 18, Im pregnant, is he going to get into trouble as im underage ?
Q. Im 15 and my boyfriend is 18.. Many people say thats wrong. But we have been together for a year and we have had sex and now im pregnat with his baby what do I do? Is he going to get in trouble with the law for having sex with me?...
A. 19 March 2007: i don't think that is what you need to be worrying about that at the mo, you need to focus on yourslef, your baby and your boyfriend.
He is unlikely to get into truoble if you are nearly 16, but it depends who you tell and why.
For example,... (read in full...)
After anal sex I bleed--is this normal or should I get to a doctor...quickly??
Q. i have this really embarassing problem, well actually theres 2 problems. I have all these spots around my bottom and can't seem to get rid of them, i've tried creams and everything, it's very off putting. Another problem i have is that my boyfre...
A. 15 March 2007: Although it is common to bleed after anal sex, it is not common to bleed when on the toilet. As you are concerned about the spots on your botttom as well, i suggest you have a chat with your GP. In the meantime, lay off the anal sex for a bit, and... (read in full...)
My boyfriend hates it when the cat joins us on the bed!
Q. My boyfriend and I have been living together in my place for awhile and he hates when my cat sleeps in our bed. It's a subject we continually argue about, even though it's ridiculous. He is not allergic, he just simply thinks that animals don't ...
A. 15 March 2007: I have to say, i agree with you bloke... animals don't belong on the bed. However, you had this cat before you met him, and had set up a routine which he came in and tried to destroy. Also, since it is your house, you have a right as to who sleeps ... (read in full...)
He ejaculated inside me as I was beginning my period..could I still get pregnant?
Q. hey everyone, this could be a really silly question but i need help, 2 weeks on friday i slept with this lad i kno but i was jus startin my period at the time i wasn't bleeding loads jus a little spots anyway i slept with him that nyt and he came ...
A. 15 March 2007: I know how you must feel... i went through the same emotions 8 months ago, and as it turned out i was pregnant... i am only 15!!! Unfortunately, you could still get pregnant, as there is no sure time during your cycle where you can't get pregnant... (read in full...)
How can I find a male figure that my child and I can depend on?
Q. I am pregnant (as you may have gurssed by the name) and i don't really know the father. In fact, i was stupid enough to get in the car with a complete stranger. I was worried about finding a father figure for my child, as i dont want him or her ...
A. 15 March 2007: Thanks guys, you have been so helpful! I will let you all know when i have had the baby, and i'll keep you all updated as to how i get along. Dr. Pete, my baby is due in 5 weeks, on the 19th of April!
Thanks again, you guys are great!
all the best... (read in full...)
If people dont like me I totally reject them but I am a pet to people I do like!
Q. I sort of reject people when i realize that they don't like me. To the extent that i don't accept their existence on this planet. I don't want to keep doing this, but it happens unconsciously. And when some likes me, i become sort of a pet to them. ...
A. 14 March 2007: I think you are just afraid of being hurt, and the people you think may hurt you you cut out from your life. There is not always something wrong with doing this, however you must make sure you give people a chance to get to know you and make their ... (read in full...)
Why do women go for bad guys rather than guys who would love and treat them well?
Q. why does it seem that some women are attracted and stay with the guys who treat them bad , and the real decent guys who would only treat a woman with love and respect get treated with contempt by women ?...
A. 14 March 2007: I am going out with a 'bad boy' and the main reason is i have been through shi* in the past and need protecting... i do not see him as a 'project' or someone to 'work on'... just someone who likes a bit of rough (Which i am willing to give) and who ... (read in full...)
How do you know when your truely in love with someone?
Q. How do you know when your truely in love with someone? Ive thought ive been in love bout 4 times (alot for someone my age (20) i know) but then after the relationship has ended or something, ive realised it wasnt love. I think ive fallen in love ...
A. 14 March 2007: I know it is wuite negative, but think about what you would be like if you didn't have this guy anymore... would you stop washing and loose the will to live? Love is soemthing that you just know about when you get there... and there is no possible ... (read in full...)
After 3 years of being with my bf-I suddenly have become afraid of sex! What is wrong with me?
Q. This is going to sound stupid but here goes.. I'm 21 and have been with my boyfriend for 3 years. We love eachother so much :) He's the first person I slept with and at first it was great, I loved it. But all of a sudden I've become scared of it.. ...
A. 14 March 2007: You say you have not had a bad experience in the past... are you sure about this? It could be that your mind has blocked out soemthing bad that has happened to you.
Or it could be you are just going off sex.
I presume you have spoken to your boy... (read in full...)
Has anybody had experience of meeting a man in the real world? Does it usually end in disaster or could it turn out to be the real thing!
Q. I have recently started an on-line 'relationship' with a man who lives a few miles away. We are getting on great by emails and texts and have swapped photos, he thinks we could be best mates and hopefully lovers one day, he feels very strongly that ...
A. 14 March 2007: You have had some positive feedback about online dating, which i am afraid i am unable to give, since i had a terrible experience meeting up with someone i met on the net. I wont go into details, however, since i know a few people who have had a fab ... (read in full...)
I belong to an asian culture. Is it true in the west, you can have sex with anyone you want?
Q. I belong to asian culture and i have this mindset about West that you are free to do whatever you want there. Meaning you can have sex with anyone you want to, if both are ready. Is this true? ...
A. 14 March 2007: Here in the Uk, we can have sex with whome we please... providing we are both over the age of 16, and both consentng. However, it seems to me as if you are considering turning your back on your culture... Whilst i agree everyone should have free ... (read in full...)
My bf and I want to have sex...but not sure if I want to give up my virginity! Help?
Q. I am almost 16 and i have to make a huge decison. My boyfreind wants to have sex. He keeps reminding me that he doesnt want to force me into anything and we must both feel comfortable and want to do it. he said he has protection and everything. I ...
A. 14 March 2007: By the fact that you are looking at the consequences of your actions before you take them, i can tell that you are quite a mature girl.
However, since you are not 100% sure you want to have sex with this guy, then i suggest you leave it for a whil... (read in full...)
How can I have our first night having sex together to be comfortable and special? Any tips?
Q. me and my gf have decided that we are going ot have sex together for the first time. We are both virgins and have all of the contraception sorted etc. WE've been together for 4-5 months and are both totally ready. Neither of us are not really the ...
A. 14 March 2007: Make sure you are both relaxed and have loads of foreplay... this will wetten her and make it more comfy for both of you. And afterward, have a abit of a cuddle and relax together. All the best
and have fun!
xxx... (read in full...)
If you are under the age of 16, can a girl go on the pill?
Q. i was wondering if your under the age of 16 can you go on the pill. both me and my boyfriend are wanting to go further but i am terrified of getting pregnant!...
A. 14 March 2007: Im sure you dont want the Your too Young... lecture, but you will get it becasue although you can go on the pill, you will need to see your doc. before you can.
all the best
xxx... (read in full...)
I put a camera in my sister's bedroom and watched her have sex with her boyfriend.
Q. Im obsessed with my sister. Im 16, she's 18. recently i started having dreams about having sex with my sister, so i thought if i could see her naked I could fullfil this fantasy and it would stop. So i secretly put a camera in her bedroom and reco...
A. 14 March 2007: I wondered how you were getting on with the advice you have been given? I know it is quite scary for you to be feeling these things, especially since you are obsessing with your sister. However, i put forward to you that it is not your sister you ... (read in full...)
How can you tell if your gf is a real virgin??
Q. How do i get to know if my girlfriend is a real virgin? She said she is but i dont trust her enough becasue she had been in a relationship before and seems to know a lot about sex. Is it true that all women bleed on their 1st time? She is just 15 ...
A. 14 March 2007: You definatley can't have sex with this girl. Not only is she not old enough, but you don't trust her, and that is no position to be in when your condidering having sex with someone. When you know whether you love her, not only will she be old ... (read in full...)
Was I too rough? She said it was the best sex she'd ever had!
Q. last night i had sex with my ex and i will admit it was very rough she kept moing saying it was amizing and it felt fantastic eventually she had to keep stoping cause her clit was hurting to much and she did bleed a little bit but i dont no whether ...
A. 13 March 2007: You need to trust your gf. If she said it was great, believe her. If you are really worried about it, try having slow, sweaty, passionate sex, and ask her which she prefers.
SOme girls do like a bit of rough, and if you both enjoyed it, then carr... (read in full...)
How do I stop letting my neurotic criticisms of everyone I've ever been interested prevent me from even approaching her?/
Q. I always overthink things when considering people to ask out, and so it usually mires and gets stuck with me never doing anything about it. Oh, and if it doesn't show up due to anonymous, I'm 17 years old. Anyways, there's a girl I was immediatle...
A. 12 March 2007: If anyone is saying something to you that causes you to doubt yourself, stick your fingers in your ears and yell la la la lala la la la la la la until they get the idea and shut up. No one has the right to make you feel low. Think of all her good... (read in full...)
Should I take the plunge with my friend ? the Sexual tension is mounting, but would this ruin it ?
Q. A dear friend of mine have this unspoken thing for oneanother. I dont want to ruin our friendship but i have had a serious crush on her for a long time now and its apparent she does too. So much so our friendship is boarderline awkward as a result ...
A. 9 March 2007: You have to be prepared for the fact that if you and your friend were to get involved in a sexual relationship, things between you could never be the same agin. However, if there is tension between you, you both need to talk about how to move things ... (read in full...)
I know he loves me but I have lost my trust in him!
Q. Hi there, I've been with my current partner for almost 6 months. He has been showing his love and care, but somehow I lost my ability to trust him. I was hurt by my ex bf who cheated on me, but he claimed that because I had always doubt him, and...
A. 8 March 2007: Try to focus on your current relationship rather than the past ones. This will help relieve your misconceptions about your current bf. If this current bf has done nothing to deserve your mistrust, let him know. Tell him exactly what you have wri... (read in full...)
Mytwo year needs bottles to keep him asleep all night! What can I do?
Q. i have a 2yr old and he is still drinking bottle through the night he is drinking 6 bottles and its the only way i can get him to stay asleep alnight help...
A. 6 March 2007: if i were you, i would try giving your child a snack before bedtime, to help him sleep through the night. Encourage him to start drinking from cups and praise good habbits. If he wakes during the night, give a drink from a cup...not a bottle...and ... (read in full...)
I had protected sex with a woman and the condom split, she told me she has had unprotected sex with men before. Should I be worried?
Q. Hi,I am very concern about this, I hope you can give me some good advice, I had protected sex with a female, during intercourse the condom split, and I actually came inside her, but came out quick. She told me later she had a unprotected sex with ...
A. 6 March 2007: If you are concerned, the best thing you can do is visit your doctor and get some tests done for any STI's. I am glad she was open with you about her past relationships, and i hope this will bring you closer together. If you get checked out, and ... (read in full...)
Should I go back to her and will I ever be able to get these awful images and thoughts of them out of my mind?
Q. Sorry, bit of a long and complex one but I'd really apprecaite some advice because I haven't got any friends who have been this involved before and hence they can't understand. I have been seeing and living with my girlfriend for the last 3 years. ...
A. 6 March 2007: when i started reading your story, my advice was going to be to have a child with her, as sometimes it is the only way to get through the loss of a child. However, my mind had changed by the time i had finished your story. My heart really reaches ... (read in full...)
SITE NEWS: Had DearCupid changed your life in a positive way? I want to hear your stories...
Q. Has DearCupid changed your life in a positive way? If so, please let me know. Either post here (anon if you prefer) or send me a private mail. Sometimes when I'm coding at midnight or tinkering with an errant database, or wondering wh...
A. 6 March 2007: Andrew, this site rocks! it helped me not to feel so down coz i am helping others. All i can say is... Dude... u rock! all the best xxxxxxxx... (read in full...)
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