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... Send laura585 a private message | | | laura585's profile:I am 24 year old single mother of two beautiful children. I have a 3 year old daughter and a two year old son. I recently got out of 6 year relationship with a person who treated me in ways no human should ever treat another human being. I have learned a lot and hope to share it to help others. At the same time I have a lot to learn and use this site as a source of insight into other peoples' minds and hearts. I'm always open, although I only have internet from my cellphone so I'm not able to reply to private messages for some odd reason :( BUT if you send me one I will get back to you one way or another, just maybe not as soon as you would've liked. |
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She doesn't initiate contact - should I move on?
Q. Since last year, it has becomes long distance relationship. It goes well for the first few months then have a huge fight. Problem rooted from trust issue and we ended up badly. I believe it is both fault. If only I trust her little more and ...
A. 22 July 2009: If she is not replying and not answering then maybe you should move on. I know it's easier said than done- but there are so many girls out there, at first they may not "measure up" since you will have this girl stuck in your mind- but you will see: ... (read in full...)
He was billed for a phone sex line but is denying it
Q. ok here goes...my husband got a bill in the mail today well it was for a 6 min talk to phone sex number...he said he didn't do it but I call it back and the first thing they ask you for is your credit card number..and the bill he got had the last ...
A. 22 July 2009: Well unless his credit card AND his cell phone were stolen then I think it's pretty safe to say he's the one who called. What YOU need to think about is this- how big of a deal is this to you? Some women would just shrug this off as being similar to ... (read in full...)
What's worse ? being a slut or being 40 years old virgin ?
Q. What is better either having sex with many people or keep virginity until you're way too old ? What do you think ?...
A. 13 July 2009: Trying to make a decision about sex? Just because (I'm assuming) your a virgin NOW doesn't mean it will stay that way until your 40 unless you make absolutely no effort whatsoever. Personally I wouldnt marry either one. Most guys I know lean to the ... (read in full...)
What's worse ? being a slut or being 40 years old virgin ?
Q. What is better either having sex with many people or keep virginity until you're way too old ? What do you think ?...
A. 10 July 2009: Somewhere in between is probably better.... (read in full...)
How do I give myself a Beauty Makeover?
Q. Hi i dunno if dis is a valid question but could i get tips on how to get good skin-lik totally pimple free n glowin?? n also my hair is neither curly nor straight-its wavy n quite frizzy! how do i make it look sleek n shiny without makin it look ...
A. 10 July 2009: I have the same issue with my hair- have you ever tried straightening it? You can buy some straighteners for pretty cheap (the electric kind- not chemical) usually in the same place the hair dryers and curling irons are- that will make your hair ... (read in full...)
My breasts are different sizes by about a cup, what can I do?
Q. Ever since I was about 16, my breasts have been different sizes. Now that I'm 19, they're still different. I'd say it's a good cup size difference, so it's obvious when I'm naked. Luckily, you can't really tell when I have a shirt on, although my ...
A. 10 July 2009: It is perfectly normal- for everyone. I dont think I know a girl with perfectly matched up breasts, myself included.(unless their fake) I'm 24, I'm sure they're staying this way. For some girls the difference isnt noticable except of course to ... (read in full...)
Why has the man I had an affair with gone cold?
Q. A friend from the past , has been chatting to me on facebook ,I had posted some holiday photos and he commented on how good I looked . I am married with 2 children and he is in a relationship with 1 child. He chatted me up and gave me his mobile ...
A. 10 July 2009: He is cheating but has some morals, he is feeling guilty and you should be too. If you are not happy with your marriage you should leave it and let your husband find someone who will respect him.... (read in full...)
What would be the outcome if I'm pregnant?
Q. My boyfriend and I have had a unprotected sex quite a few times. I know it was stupid as I have condoms and I have birth control pills which I choose not to take. Long story short - I am a dumb fifteen year old I suppose. I've been on this sit...
A. 10 July 2009: Well first off a "mistake" is something that usually only happens once, and usually when you don't know any better. But you admit to "being dumb" about the way you choose to have sex. You KNOW you should have used protection and you chose not to. ... (read in full...)
Why did he apologise?
Q. hello everyone :) okay so today i had to go to drivers ed and pick up my friend "Jack" too. Jack and I have always been very close friends but about a month ago we took it a step forward....we disided to send pictures of our selfs to eachother(n...
A. 10 July 2009: He apologized because he figured since you pushed him away that you didn't want him to do that..... You are very young, I want to lecture you but I'm not your Mother... Just please be careful- its all fun and games now, but your childhood is very ... (read in full...)
Should I try harder, keep myself to myself, or just give up?
Q. I have known my best guy friend for over a year now, we get on great. I used to like him A LOT, I confessed my feelings for him once and he said he only liked me as a close friend. I eventually got over him and our friendship was never ruined, so ...
A. 10 July 2009: Well, do you have a suspicion the other girl he likes more is you since he won't tell you? It doesn't mean it is you, I'm a girl too and we tend to think things like that. I have figured out by now that guys are usually pretty straight-forward, when ... (read in full...)
Is he gay?
Q. Ok, So I was In my senior year of high school,and I met a dude. First, it started off as friends...me being gay and attracted to him I told him I was gay. He told me he didnt really care his exact words were, "Im Open Minded that stuff doesnt really ...
A. 10 July 2009: Well no straight guys I know do anything sexual with other dudes. I think he's gay, but fears all the critisizing that can come with it. Maybe his family would disapprove, or his friends etc. I wouldn't pressure him to admit that he's gay- just have ... (read in full...)
All my friends ditched me after my breakup. I'm lonely :-( how do I get out of this rut?
Q. Hi im wondering what to do with myself. My bf and I ended an 9 year relationship and I moved towns. Even though he cheated on me none of our mutual friends speak to me any more and im very lonely because I no longer have any friends. I try and...
A. 10 July 2009: If you really want friends you have to try harder. Your not a school girl- when it was easy: "do you wanna be my friend?" "yes!" bam! best friends lol- if you dont feel like it's "worth it" then you are not trying hard enough. No one is going to ... (read in full...)
I want her to desire me again!
Q. ok so my wife and i are 20 and our son will be 1 on july 12th we got married march 27, 2008. we have always had a very intimate relationship. but within the past 5 months she just doesn't seem interested in me anymore. i have asked her why she ...
A. 10 July 2009: She is young (as are you) and has a child. I wouldn't jump to the conclusion that she is cheating- maybe she just feels a little trapped by the whole situation. Why not get a sitter so the both of you can go out and enjoy your youth! Do this often ... (read in full...)
How can I make my wife feel valued?
Q. My wife said she doesn't feel important to me what do I do? Right now she said she needs a break what are some things I can do to make her feel special and to show how much I really love her?...
A. 10 July 2009: When she said she "wants a break" did she mean like a vacation with you, a vacation alone, or a break from the relationship? All of these breaks are very different and depending on her answer the advice I offer would be different for each one... ... (read in full...)
Worried all I'll be able to think about during sex is getting pregnant
Q. Okay so I have been talking to this guy for a year and we just started dating about 2 and a half months ago. I'm pretty sure I love him ha, actually I do love him. He means the world to me, well he's ready to have sex and I am too I'm pretty sure. ...
A. 10 July 2009: Sex is for reproduction. That is it's main cause... if in your life you are not in a situation that you could support a baby (judging by your age alone, you're not.) Then you are not ready for sex. Sex is a huge responsibility and even with proper ... (read in full...)
This is beyond crazy! I have developed a twitch. I have thrown up multiple times at work from the loads of anxiety! HELP!
Q. It was a coworkers last day today and our boss took us all out to lunch. I had to make sure that I sat next to all women because my boyfriend would otherwise be angry. I was on gchat with my blackberry the whole time in case he needed to check on ...
A. 10 July 2009: One thing I wanted to add: when I said "there are no victims only volunteers" I didn't want to make you think I was saying that you WANT this sort of treatment. You may've heard the saying before and know what it means but just in case I wanted to ... (read in full...)
This is beyond crazy! I have developed a twitch. I have thrown up multiple times at work from the loads of anxiety! HELP!
Q. It was a coworkers last day today and our boss took us all out to lunch. I had to make sure that I sat next to all women because my boyfriend would otherwise be angry. I was on gchat with my blackberry the whole time in case he needed to check on ...
A. 10 July 2009: He's an abuser. But it's true what they say "there are no victims, only volunteers." You need to get out and you need to do it now. I don't know how long you 2 have been together but it will get worse as time goes on. I KNOW IT FEELS LIKE THERE IS ... (read in full...)
Why do all girls flirt with me when they are unavailable?
Q. I don't know what's wrong with me. Hey, I've just turned 20, and have started to realise that I have issues with girls. Basically, I find that I only like, or fall for a girl who either has a boyfriend, or who I can't have, and seem to enjoy pu...
A. 10 July 2009: You like the chase but not the catch! I don't know how to cure this problem and I really have no advice to offer, but why don't you try for a SINGLE shy/quiet girl. They tend to usually play "hard to get" and maybe if you do "get" her and there is ... (read in full...)
Should I believe a Married Man?
Q. About a month ago I was out havin drinks with a friend of mine. we met two guys at a bar and started havin great convo. at the end of the nite we kissed and i got his number 2 days later i sent him a text and 2 days later i got a response. later on ...
A. 10 July 2009: There is a saying "they never leave their wives." You should think about that- obviously he IS being honest when he says he's unhappy with his marriage, otherwise you wouldnt even know his name. BUT that doesn't neccesarily mean that he will break ... (read in full...)
Why is he so mean to me when we've broken up?
Q. Hi, me and my boyfriend broke up a few weeks ago, I'm feeling really down and depressed, because we ended up in ugly terms, he was so mean and rude to me, telling me things like these: - I don't wanna talk to you, whats the part you dont get? -...
A. 10 July 2009: I don't know why he's being so rude and I know how bad that can hurt when someone who you've shared special memories with says things like that to you. It tears you apart and you just want to at least be on good terms. You know what may help you - ... (read in full...)
I dream about kissing a girl which end up getting food in my mouth
Q. everytime i have a dream that involves me kissing a girl, i kiss her and then i end up getting a bunch of material like food from her mouth into mine. why is that? i've never kissed a girl (unfortunately) if that matters. any thoughts or similar ...
A. 9 July 2009: I agree, your subconcious is manifesting these dreams because you are afraid/nervous about kissing since you've never done it before. I'm no Freudian, but it sounds correct to me! ... (read in full...)
Can I ask her out or is she 'off-limits'?
Q. Hi, I asked not too long ago about a good gift for a female co-worker for her b-day. Well I got something for her, and she really liked it. Like her expression showed it the whole day. A few days ago, I heard some bad news that implied she was ...
A. 9 July 2009: Do it. You will for sure be kicking yourself later if you don't, and you know that. Even if she turns you down at least you will build up confidence about, and have a little experience to, ask the next girl out! She could just as easily say yes and ... (read in full...)
How do I do a good hand job or blow job?
Q. Dont make fun of me anyone please!!! But I really need some advice on how to give a good handjob/blowjob. I feel really bad for my boyfriend and me because he goes down on me and hes really good at it, but whenever I try to go down on him he's just ...
A. 9 July 2009: The only way to know exactly what will satisfy your guy is asking him! Don't be afraid to do so. Ask him EXACTLY what he wants you to do, how he wants you to do it, and for how long. He's the one with ALL the answers, although some people may give ... (read in full...)
I've fallen in love with another girl - but I know my family expects me to marry a Muslim man! What do we do?
Q. I've got myself in a right mess and don't know what to do. Sorry if this is so long.. I'm female,19 and muslim. My family are religious, and i do believe in some aspects of my faith but i don't really go to mosque much and my parents don't pr...
A. 8 July 2009: Your story is heart-wrenching but very sweet. I'm all for running away with the person you love, especially when you know no one else will understand. I can't say for sure if it will be the best choice in the long run or not- only time can tell. If ... (read in full...)
How seriously should I take this comment that he loves me?
Q. What do you think it means if a guy's female friend starts mentioning he loves you in a half joking sort of way? This girl is nice, mature and 28 years old, so it's not like she's saying haha, you so love her! In a teenager sort of way. Or like his ...
A. 8 July 2009: It could be that she is just noticing her friends attraction to you - maybe he acts differently with you then he did with past girlfriends and this girl is commenting on that. I wouldn't take it to mean that he's head over heels and wants to be with ... (read in full...)
How do I get my dad to like my boyfriend? And is this relationship illegal or immoral? I'm almost 18, he's 26.
Q. i am a 17 year old girl, i turn 18 in 3 weeks. my boyfried is 26. we love eachother very much and things are going really well between us... however, some of my family, especially my parents dont approve and say it is morally wrong and some of my ...
A. 8 July 2009: You can't "make" your dad like him. Even if your boyfriend is the most wonderful guy on the planet it doesn't mean your dad will like him. He has to give him a chance first- and it doesn't sound like he's planning on doing that anytime soon. I would ... (read in full...)
I have a boyfriend and the chef at work is hitting on me!
Q. Hi all. Im 16, and have just got a part-time job at a restaurant to earn some extra money as a waitress. My mum knows the owners, and sometimes helps out there herself, and one of my mates works there and so does my cousin. My boyfriend has also ...
A. 8 July 2009: Just try not to think about the fact that he asked you out. Next time you're at work just treat him as you always have, no different. It may have to be an act at first but eventually it will come naturally and tho you may always have it in the back ... (read in full...)
My brother is in love with my girlfriend!
Q. Ok Aunts, My brother says hes in love with my girlfriend and hes constantly touching her,staring at her and hes tried to kiss her until she hit him and i was inthe room when this happened and i went mad.Once before we were watching a movie ...
A. 8 July 2009: Maybe next time she could bring a single female friend over with her, when your brother is around maybe she will think he's cute and keep him out of you two's business. Or maybe just have dates at her place or or out on the town somewhere, a park, ... (read in full...)
He said he couldn't let me in right now. What does that mean?
Q. My ex and I have been exes since early winter, but we were still seeing each other when I got pregnant in January. Our baby was stillborn 2 weeks ago, and I think that brought us a little closer because we were having some really ROUGH times at the ...
A. 8 July 2009: He doesn't trust you. He doesn't want to "let you in" because last time he did that you trampled all over his heart. He will have to be able to trust you again, and this will take a lot of time and effort- if he is even willing to invest that time ... (read in full...)
Advice about asking an ex out?
Q. my girlfriend and i broke up about a month ago. we have been going out for a little over a year. she said that she loved me but wasnt in love with me anymore. when we were together i had trust issues with her so she didnt go out much and she slept ...
A. 8 July 2009: Don't pressure her- you said "I don't think she is too excited about meeting me..." and you were clingy and had issues by your own admission- maybe its best you let her go and find someone more equipped to handle a relationship like the kind you ... (read in full...)
My friend was upset over the death of her mom. I tried to comfort her with a joke...and I think I made her feel worse! Help!
Q. My friend's mom died recently(6days ago)and she been upset lately. The other day she was at my place crying her eyes out. I wasnt really sure how to calm her down so I made a joke thinking that would help. The joke was a bit mean now that I think ...
A. 7 July 2009: If she wont answer find another way to message her- internet, txt, voicemail, etc. APOLOGIZE. Then tell her you realize now how insincere your joke was but that it was not intended to hurt her in anway- call yourself an asshole if you need to (as ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is really uncomfortable with webcam sex. How can I help him like it?
Q. My boyfriend is really uncomfortable with webcam sex. How can I help him like it? What should we do during so it's not phone sex and not like watching porn? Due to work sometimes we have to be apart for a few weeks at a time and I really want to ...
A. 7 July 2009: I haven't ever had webacm sex. I'm not sure I know exactly what it is so I definately cant give ya any pointers - But a girl getting turned on by her boyfriend masturbating-- totally normal! Well if it's not then I'm as abnormal as you :)... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is not affectionate!
Q. I have been dating my girlfriend for over a year and I don't feel she is affectionate enough now as she was before. (I AM NOT TALKING ABOUT SEX) I have talked to her about this and she feels that it is just her personality. Sometimes i wonder ...
A. 7 July 2009: Oh I realized I just told you my story and didnt offer any advice (sorry!) be patient with your girlfriend - if she says she loves you, and is with you- its more than likely true. If this does become a major problem for you sit down and talk to her ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is not affectionate!
Q. I have been dating my girlfriend for over a year and I don't feel she is affectionate enough now as she was before. (I AM NOT TALKING ABOUT SEX) I have talked to her about this and she feels that it is just her personality. Sometimes i wonder ...
A. 7 July 2009: Well I feel like I'm about to give advice to one of my ex's :) I myself am not a very affectionate person- at first, of course, but after a while it just doesnt have as much meaning as it did in the beginning (the affection, not the relationship) ... (read in full...)
Whenever we made plans they didn't work out and now I think she doesn't like me
Q. ok so im really shy around everybody that i dont know well and i really like this girl. we used to talk everyday and we made plans to hang out this one day(im not in town that much) and it didnt work out so we made plans the next day and again it ...
A. 6 July 2009: I have been dealing with being shy my whole life- you have to make a conscious effort to improve - it doesnt have to be a part of who you are. Once you stop labeling yourself as a "shy person" and think of yourself as outgoing, then you start to ... (read in full...)
3 years and now he wants a break!
Q. if your a 3 year relationship and he asks for break should i give him space and how will i know were going to get back together and is it good to be friends?...
A. 6 July 2009: Three years is a long time- ecspecially at your age. Did he say why he wants a break? Or what he's planning on doing with the break? Sometimes people say "we should take a break" but it really just means "i dont want to be with you anymore, but i ... (read in full...)
Sex has no spice!
Q. i am in a gay committed relationship with my boyfriend and he says he loves me but the sex has gotten no taste and just wanted to know how i could spice it up and prevent him from leaving me cuz i am really in love with him for three years and wqant ...
A. 6 July 2009: Well I've never been in a homosexual male relationship lol but I think its safe to assume its just like any other loving long-term relationship :) Try some things you two havent done yet. Maybe for example: roleplay- you can get pretty extravagant ... (read in full...)
I'm not good at figuring out the signs if a guy is interested
Q. I've been dating this guy for about a month after knowing him for a couple of months before that. Before meeting him, it's been a long time since I've done any dating so I'm out of practice at reading any signs and I'm not sure how much he's ...
A. 6 July 2009: Well it sounds to me like he likes you and is just taking it slow? I'm no expert, though. Either way I say as long as you are having a good time and so is he there is no need to label and pinpoint each action. Have fun with it, it could end up being ... (read in full...)
I hurt him, cheated and now want him back
Q. I was in a long distant relationship for 2 years with my bestfriend of 4 years and I cheated on him with my ex-boyfriend. When my fiance finally came home he broke up with me. He says he does not see me the way he once did. We continued to hang out ...
A. 6 July 2009: He will have to find it in his heart to forgive you. He doesnt trust you either, neither would I. Sometimes we make mistakes and actually have to deal with the consequences. Good luck to you both.... (read in full...)
I don't feel like my life is complete and goals seem so out of reach!
Q. im 23 female. ive got a good home lots of pets a bit in debt but working on it. but i just dont feel like my lifes complete and my goals feel so far out of reach with the way things have went finacially in this world before say 8 yrs ago nothing was ...
A. 6 July 2009: There are a lot of self help/motivational books. Some people turn to a religious answer and ask God for guidance. I'm more practical myself, I have recently read "Maximum Acheivement" by Brain Tracy- it really just makes you realize that if you ... (read in full...)
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