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This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
14 February 2010: I just wanted to wish each and every person who visits this site a Very Happy Valentines Day! Whether you are with someone or not, here's wishing you all happiness, good health, and prosperity! ~Brooklyngirl~...
Everything Happens For a Reason - WHY?
This question has 8 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
26 December 2009: I am a firm believer that "Everything Happens For a Reason!" The problem is that we don't know the reason! We can drive ourselves mad asking ourselves "WHY?" Why do people touch our lives and then disappear? Why is there so much pain and h...
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I'm thinking of calling off the wedding! I'm tired of his moods!
Q. Hello We are getting married this July and been together 15mths. We have a house together. Things have always been turbulent in our relationship. When we met he got made redundant and had to get a job on less money miles away so he has to get...
A. 9 January 2010: If he suffers from depression, it isn't going to just go away! The mood swings are common. Is he taking medication? That can help control the outbursts. You're right, he's an angry man, who needs help. You can't help him though...he need... (read in full...)
Ladies, here's something for you. I want your opinions on this?
Q. Is it true that you girls will never forget or always feel something for the guy that you "never got"? The one that you knew you loved but he never asked you to be in a relationship. Do you still think about him even after you're in a new ...
A. 9 January 2010: It's true that they come in and out of your mind at times, but it doesn't prevent a woman from falling in love and having a very happy life with a man. It's just a memory that fades with time, and pops in to say hi once in a while. BG... (read in full...)
Is he trying to upset me on purpose?
Q. I have no idea what to do this guy i ve been seeing him for 8 months ago but i dont know what to think about him he sometimes is nice sometimes very cold and distante and he says he cares about me,the thing is that he is planning to make vactions ...
A. 7 January 2010: Does he know this is upsetting you? If not, maybe you need to tell him.
It's hard to say why he is planning this trip without you. Maybe he just wants to get an idea of where you come from. But I would think it would be more enjoyable for him ... (read in full...)
Body Odour causing a real problem, I don't know why, help!!
Q. Why Do I have Body Oudour? Please answer this seriously as its upsetting. I bath and change my clothes every day and wash my hair and use deodorants YET still I have a funny smell about me. Its NOT because IM not clean and I have been to the...
A. 5 January 2010: Hmmm...If your doctor "just shrugged and said nothing they can do" maybe you can find yourself a woman doctor who would be more compasionate, and concerned.
The advice about drinking lots of water, is a good idea, and vitamins.
I hope ... (read in full...)
Am I related to her and if not would it be right to pursue a relationship?
Q. I have liked this girl for quite a while now and never had the confidence to ask her out for the fear being rejected, my mate says that she likes me but I think he's just saying that to make me feel better. On New Year's Eve she was out and I ...
A. 5 January 2010: That is something the two of you will have to decide for yourselves. If you think it will cause problems with family memebers, maybe you should walk away from it before it is too difficult to do so.
Whatever you decide, I wish you luck!... (read in full...)
Is minimal contact best way to fall out of love?
Q. I fell for my best friend (female). Didn't say, because I was certain she didn't feel the same, although we are ridiculously close. Anyway, many of our mutual friends were convinced she did feel the same, as although she denied it verbally, her ...
A. 4 January 2010: If you are considering limiting contact with her, wouldn't that hurt her more than telling her you have feelings for her? I think so!
Being honest with her, doesn't seem like it would hurt her...and wouldn't be as awkward as if you just stop han... (read in full...)
Fishy situation... should I trust my long distance boyfriend?
Q. ok so im seeing this guy and its long distance..hes coming back to see me soon.. he lives in ireland .. on his facebook the other day it said he was in a relationship i was so mad i didnt speak to him for days and it ruined my new years.. he wasnt ...
A. 4 January 2010: My reaction was exactly the same as "Ask Older Sister!" Did you ever wonder why he hadn't changed his status to "In a relationship" for you?
I think it's all "Fishy!"... (read in full...)
Am I related to her and if not would it be right to pursue a relationship?
Q. I have liked this girl for quite a while now and never had the confidence to ask her out for the fear being rejected, my mate says that she likes me but I think he's just saying that to make me feel better. On New Year's Eve she was out and I ...
A. 3 January 2010: You are not blood relations... (read in full...)
Should I forgive my husband?
Q. I have been married for over twenty years, my husband told me a few months ago that he is hauted by the thought of havingsex with multiple partners, including myself. I really tried to understand him, but I am not at the same point as he is. Finall...
A. 3 January 2010: I don't think forgiveness is a decision we make. It comes from the heart!
I know, I don't have a switch I can turn on and off when it comes to forgiveness!
We can say we forgive someone but truly feeling it is a different matter.
If we do ... (read in full...)
Sex with my husband is almost zero! Help!
Q. Hi, I don't understand what's happening with me and my husband. We been married for only 2 years, his 20 years old and i'm 23. I feel as if he's changed, when we were boyfriend and girlfriend before, we were so active with making love. But now that ...
A. 3 January 2010: This is definitely something you should discuss with him! Instead of dropping hints, tell him straight out that you are feeling neglected sexually. Ask if there are problems.
It may be the responsibilities of married life have been stre... (read in full...)
My lover wants to be watched!
Q. hi i have been in a relationship for the past 18 months and we have both fallen in love with each other very much so. our sex live is wounderful and we are exploring each other. a few weeks ago whilst having sex i asked about what her fantasy was,...
A. 3 January 2010: I have had lots of fantasies in my adult life...but never wished to truly act on them. That's why fantasies are so great! They are things that you wouldn't normally experience.
Discuss it further if you wish...but be careful, it could be the u... (read in full...)
My family frustrate me. How do I handle their taunts?
Q. God im so angry! My job is high pressured, i work in a contact centre in customer service making outbound calls, my targets are high and on average a day i speak to 80 -90 people. Calls are recorded and it quite a strict place. Anyway today at...
A. 3 January 2010: It's a terrible thing when loved-ones criticize and minimize your work!
Take it from where it comes! I don't blame you for being angry! I would be too! Just don't take it on as truth!
You know how hard you work. You know you make a differen... (read in full...)
I got off with my friend's girlfriend when she was drunk.... now what?
Q. Hey there! Something strange happened this new year's eve. I went to a friends place to celebrate. There were 4 of us (me, my brother, friend and the one who invited me). We got pretty drunk and at 1 am in the morning the girlfriend of th...
A. 3 January 2010: It probably wouldn't have ever happened if you weren't drinking, correct??
Go on as nothing happened. She may not even remember it. Don't risk your friendship over a kiss!!
There are many many women out there....find one of your own!!!!... (read in full...)
I get nasty when drunk but ONLY with my boyfriend! Why??
Q. Me and my boyfriend have a perfect relationship, he's loving and caring, attentive and passionate, basically everything a girl could want, obviously it has its little problems however in general its good. The problem is when we drink i always end up ...
A. 3 January 2010: Apparently, there are issues that you suppress until alcohol brings them out. Maybe not the mean things you say (and don't really mean)
There's a totally different dynamic with your friends. You are on a different emotional level.
If you ... (read in full...)
He's 29 years older than me!
Q. my boyfriend n me really love each other a lot. we can die for each. n v r so close to each other that v cant even imagine life without each other. the only problem is that he is 29 years older than me...i know its shocking...bu v love each other a ...
A. 3 January 2010: I don't know where you are from but in my country that man would be considered a pedophile!
Of course your family won't agree with it! He is an adult and you are a child!
Your customs may be different....but some things are just wrong!... (read in full...)
Isn't she into me any more?
Q. Ive been in a relationship with the same woman for over 14 years and we are both in our thirties. We have two children 2(boy) and 7(girl) my lady says that i annoy her too much when i try to cuddle (she says i'm too heavy or i'm squishing her. I'm ...
A. 3 January 2010: Communication is the key to any relationship. Try talking to her and tell her how you are feeling. Maybe together you can come up with some new tricks!
Good luck!
~BG~... (read in full...)
Isn't she into me any more?
Q. Ive been in a relationship with the same woman for over 14 years and we are both in our thirties. We have two children 2(boy) and 7(girl) my lady says that i annoy her too much when i try to cuddle (she says i'm too heavy or i'm squishing her. I'm ...
A. 3 January 2010: Not that I believe this is the true problem...but there are ways to cuddle without squishing her. Even during sex, try not to put all your weight on her chest/lungs...it is difficult to breath. Lean a little bit to the side.
If your life is gett... (read in full...)
Help! Her past is freaking me out!!!
Q. Hello dear cupid, here I am again. Yesterday I had the strangest day of my life. With my Gf we are together for 7 months, and we really love and live together in same appartement.May be in future she will be my wife who knows. So yesterday she was ...
A. 3 January 2010: The older we get, the more of a past, and more baggage we have. I tend to leave the past in the past! Both mine and my boyfriends.
It doesn't matter to us what we did in the past as long as we love eachother and are faithful to oneanother now!... (read in full...)
Everything Happens For a Reason - WHY?
Q. I am a firm believer that "Everything Happens For a Reason!" The problem is that we don't know the reason! We can drive ourselves mad asking ourselves "WHY?" Why do people touch our lives and then disappear? Why is there so much pain and h...
A. 2 January 2010: Thanks for additional responses! I believe that what doesn't kill us, definitely makes us stronger!
Man! I must be really, really strong! LOL....
Thanks again
~BG~... (read in full...)
Did I do the right thing by stopping my daughter from masturbating?
Q. My eleven year old girl has been masturbating lately. Last year for her birthday i bought her this toy dog that when you pull the tail it vibrates. Four days ago i peeked into her room and saw her repeatedly pulling the tail and she had it on her ...
A. 2 January 2010: In my opinion, it is fine for her to be experimenting with her body. It is perfectly normal and healthy! It is a shock for a mom to find their daughter doing it! We are so resourceful as humans! It is amazing how she discovered a beneficial use ... (read in full...)
Is it ok to have oral sex if you are Muslim?
Q. Hi dere, I am muslim and got marrried 2 years ago and my wife is askin for oral sex just wanted to know that is it allowed to give oral sex to women in islam.... Thanks for ur help in advance ...
A. 2 January 2010: Well...I am not Muslim...but I would think that the rules would be the same under any God...
You are man and wife! You would not breaking any laws by making love to your wife in any way that pleases her.
I am sure you will get some answers ... (read in full...)
We argue about everything and he always blames me for starting them! What should I do?
Q. I have been in an relationship for 1 1/2 years we now have a 2 month old baby and he lives with me and my 12 year old son. We argue about everything.... no matter what is! We are good together financially seems everything else is a problem. He ...
A. 2 January 2010: I know what that's like, and it sucks! I was with a man for 16 years, who blamed me for everything! He also expected me to solve all his problems (which were too many to count!)
It's a terrible way to live and I am glad I'm not with him any long... (read in full...)
I'm worried I might be getting too "aroused"! Will this put men off in the future or will they laugh at me?
Q. I'm aware that when a female is sexually aroused she becomes wet and also the labia become swollen. But I am worried that when I'm aroused mine get too swollen, not enough to cause problems but enough for me to be embarrassed or self conscious. ...
A. 2 January 2010: I wouldn't worry about it! It will more likely it will work to your advantage! No one will laugh at you!... (read in full...)
How shall I face the relationship with my brother-in-law?
Q. i have a cousin that has two little children with a man that's not married with yet. this man, that i consider him to be my brother in law made me several personal compliments. that looked strange to me, but considering him to be a good family man, ...
A. 2 January 2010: You say you didn't do anything to encourage it, but you did! You continued the chats, you responded to his advances and ultimately...slept with him. You are not a victim here! Your cousin is!
Why does he have personal apartment if he has a life... (read in full...)
Questions about sex.....
Q. I think that when I have sex I will cum very quickly, and I "spring back up" quickly to, so I was thinking that I make her orgasm first so she doesn't feel "unfinished", is this a good idea, should I ask her, and should I ask her how to help her ...
A. 2 January 2010: I have to agree with q and CaringGuy again! From a womans prospective...I have to repeat q's response....yes, yes, and yes! ;)... (read in full...)
How do I end my affair with my neighbor's wife?
Q. i am married and started also started a relation with my neighbours wife. I was the one initiated it and was behind her for it. Most of the time my neighbour will be on tour.We are in to this from last 1 year. Now i want to come out of it , but now ...
A. 2 January 2010: The guys are right on once again! Just do it! Yes it will be painful if you truly care for one another, but it's the right thing to do!
Just be grateful that neither of you got caught!... (read in full...)
I feel very much shut out with fiance and daughter
Q. I am recently engaged. My fiance has a daughter 36 and single. Each time she is around he doesnt not even notice or pay attention to me. He asks for her opinion first on everything , including food shopping etc. I am due to get married but I ...
A. 2 January 2010: This definitely something you should discuss before the marriage! He may not be aware that he is doing it. Talk to him about it and let him know how you are feeling. That might be all it takes to resolve it!
I wish you luck and hope that I have... (read in full...)
What is my best approach with this woman?
Q. I'm 53 years old going on 25. I have been married for almost 15 years and both my wife and I agree the marriage is over. I'm still living home because of children and financial situation. I met someone last year and it woke me up both emotionally ...
A. 2 January 2010: Learn from the mistakes you made last time! Take a good look at what you did wrong and what she did wrong and discuss them. Figure out if the two of you could learn from that and try again!
Good Luck!
~BG~... (read in full...)
Is this a case of cold feet?
Q. Ok. This is my issue. I am recently divorced (42) and I have been seeing this man for about 4 months (he is 45. We live 3 hours apart. Things were going really well. We were spending almost every weekend together. Then he went cold. Phone calls ...
A. 2 January 2010: I'm sorry this happened to you. The first thought I had, was that he met someone else. Of course, I don't know what really happened...but from my experience, that would be my guess!
No, I don't think you will get that last wish, unless thin... (read in full...)
He makes me feel so rubbish about myself that I have doubts about us!
Q. Hey, I've now currently been with my boyfriend for two months, I have known him for six months we were together before for three weeks but it didnt work out as we never saw each other much but we realised we both wanted to be with each other AL...
A. 2 January 2010: I agree with the previous poster...we need more information.
Our own insecurity sometimes causes us to feel like "rubbish."
If there are no specific reasons for you feeling this way, maybe it would be wise to do some inner soul-sea... (read in full...)
Age dfference, but can't help the feelings!
Q. Hello, I am a fourteen and a half girl. Anyway this is my dilemna and I'd really appreciate it if you could give me your input or some advice. Just recently , I went back to my homeland, where I was actually born. There we have really good fami...
A. 2 January 2010: It won't matter in the least if you wait about five years, but right now, it's best for you to find someone your own age. You will be putting him in jeopardy of jail time if you pursue this! ... (read in full...)
I told him I would call his home!
Q. I was in a relationship with a married man and I thought I got pregnant and tried to contact him several times. So I called him a few times for about 5 days and he didn't answer. Then I sent him a message stating that I thought I was pregnant and I ...
A. 2 January 2010: If a relationship has to be kept a secret, you shouldn't be in it! You knew he was married...
You are reaping what you sow.
To even think about calling his home is wrong! ... (read in full...)
Everything Happens For a Reason - WHY?
Q. I am a firm believer that "Everything Happens For a Reason!" The problem is that we don't know the reason! We can drive ourselves mad asking ourselves "WHY?" Why do people touch our lives and then disappear? Why is there so much pain and h...
A. 31 December 2009: Thanks for all your responses! You all had really good things to say. The bottom line, I guess is That without pain, we wouldn't appreciate the joy in life.
I will continue to appreciate the good times and try to learn from the bad times!
... (read in full...)
Involving boyfriends kids
Q. I have been in a relationship with my BF for nearly a year. We are in out 40's. I've been single for nearly 10 yrs. He has been divorced for 3. I live a distance away. He says he is serious about me and wants to look to marriage. His 4 ...
A. 31 December 2009: You didn't mention how old his kids are, or your daughters age either. He may be just taking it slow and allowing his children to get used to the idea, before he brings up marriage. Sometimes "blended families" are difficult and take time. ... (read in full...)
Am I overreacting about my boyfriend's eagerness for a threesome?
Q. Am I overreacting when my boyfriend is overly enthused about a threesome? I mean, I brought it up, but I just wanted to see what he would say. Now its all he can talk about, and he wants it with my best friend who is prettier than me and has bigger ...
A. 31 December 2009: You should did open up a can of worms, didn't you? Did you suggest your best friend, or was that his idea? The whole situation spells TROUBLE! You NEVER have a threesome with a mutual friend! It will cause pain for everyone involved. I m... (read in full...)
I recently found out that my boyfriend is married with kids...and dating other women!
Q. well i have a big prob i don't know what to do. I have been dating this guy for nearly year and a half now, About 8 months in the relationship i found out he is married and had kids. I was so upset. I asked him about it which he denies at first an...
A. 31 December 2009: You list a lot of reasons why you can't get away from him...but you also name the most important reasons why you MUST! Not only he's married and has kids...he has OTHER WOMEN! He deceived you, lied to you, and is not faithful to ANYONE! Ask yo... (read in full...)
I'm almost 20 and I'm bored of porn. Is this normal?
Q. I'm 19 years old- nearly 20- and I'm already bored of porn. It does not arouse me at all any more. It often bores me or disturbs me. At best it amuses me, but it is never arousing to me. I find myself turning to my imagination, or remembering past ...
A. 31 December 2009: The brain is our strongest sex organ! I agree that porn is boring, and sometimes very amusing! But my own fantasies! Now that's a different story! There is nothing wrong with you. Fantasize....you can be the writer, director and actor! ... (read in full...)
Do I leave husband & kids for a 20 year old?
Q. I am 35 and have been married for 7 years now, and have three children. My marriage has been a rocky ride up to now. My problem is that I have fallen in love with a 20 year old. He is a student an doesn't work yet. We are such good friends,we do as ...
A. 31 December 2009: I totally understand why you are feeling the way you are. Your 20 yr old is fun and exciting! Your home life is humdrum, and boring, filled with responsibility! Can you really pick-up and leave your kids for someone that cannot even offe... (read in full...)
My boyfriend keeps souvenirs of his ex
Q. Months ago, i found in my boyfriends room, cards and photos from his previous relationship. I asked him why did he keep them and he said "to remember the good memories". This hurt a lot but he eventually threw them away. He reasoning later was that ...
A. 31 December 2009: I personally NEVER get rid of pictures from my past relationships! The are part of my history, and if anyone suggested I "toss" them, I would say No! I do not keep them out in the open...they are boxed and put away...but I wouldn't get rid of ... (read in full...)
How do I get over this stupid guy!!!!
Q. Hey so this summer I worked at a camp from june to july. I met this guy that I had seen 2 years previous who I had thought was cute when I was at the camp as a camper. He was my CC (camp crush).A camp crush is just an innocent crush campers have on ...
A. 31 December 2009: It's difficult to get over someone you are that attracted to. I have been in the same position several times in my life.
The only way to get him out of your head is to find someone who is REAL! Not a fantasy figure. Keep looking for Mr. Righ... (read in full...)
Is this a good time to make amends?
Q. Hi Guys Happy New Year to everyone! My problem is that I confessed feelings I had for a female friend of mine this year, and to cut a very long story short, we haven't spoke since I did so, and basically cut each other out of each others li...
A. 31 December 2009: It doesn't hurt to try! When making amends, you can't control the response or lack of one. But you will have done your part by making the effort.
And you can always know that at least you tried.
She may be missing you too. Perhaps she has ... (read in full...)
Everything Happens For a Reason - WHY?
Q. I am a firm believer that "Everything Happens For a Reason!" The problem is that we don't know the reason! We can drive ourselves mad asking ourselves "WHY?" Why do people touch our lives and then disappear? Why is there so much pain and h...
A. 27 December 2009: Thanks for your responses! I guess the "Why" was rhetorical...I know no one can give me an explanation! Older Sister....you make a lot of good points! Thanks for the insight!... (read in full...)
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