How long do I wait for my husband to make up for a terrible 20th anniversary weekend?
Q. Married 20 years, received only a handful of birthday, anniversary, special occasion gifts. Read all the help columns and told husband exactly what I wanted for anniversary which was a week trip so we could reconnect. I started planning and he said ...
A. 17 January 2013: One of the things about many women that drives me nuts is this idea that they shouldn't have to tell their husbands these kinds of things; that he should just know.
We'll, men are terrible mind readers so you have a choice between talking ... (read in full...)
Am I in the wrong for wanting to end things and move on?
Q. Ive been in a monogamous relationship with a woman and we have recently decided to become more serious. As I get to know this person more I find out things that bother me. I'm sure there are things that bother her about me but what relationship ...
A. 14 January 2013: It sounds shallow but when you have kids you'll love them with every ounce of your being. Subjecting them to a mom with so many potential health and mental issues isn't something that you'd ever wish on them, not to mention the heredity aspects.
... (read in full...)
How do I convince my parents that this guy is the one?
Q. I will be 16 in june, and my boyfriend is 8 months older than me. We both live in Florida and have been together for 2 and 1/2 years. I truely love him, and I'd love for us to get married before we're eighteeen, but that surely won't happen. So we ...
A. 14 January 2013: Trust me, there is nothing you can say to make them believe that he's the "one". You're 15 years old. It's okay to fall in love that early, but getting married is just not a good idea.
Why not stay with him, even be engaged? You may not be able ... (read in full...)
How long do I wait for my husband to make up for a terrible 20th anniversary weekend?
Q. Married 20 years, received only a handful of birthday, anniversary, special occasion gifts. Read all the help columns and told husband exactly what I wanted for anniversary which was a week trip so we could reconnect. I started planning and he said ...
A. 14 January 2013: Absolutely not blowing it out of proportion. I'd have a serious talk with him. Like "we need to talk" talk. Tell him everything you feel. I would add that you're not happy in your relationship and you feel like you're the only one putting in any ... (read in full...)
How do I convince my LDR ex to try again?
Q. Hello, I was dating someone in a long distance relationship but she called it off months ago. The fact is we really like each other so have kept in touch as friends. I have been very patient and only recently discovered the real reason she wante...
A. 14 January 2013: Have you ever even met her? If not I don't see what you're fighting for. LDR's are difficult, why are you beginning a relay that way?
I'd reserve them for when you've been with someone for long enough to know you want to be with them but circ... (read in full...)
Am I in the wrong for wanting to end things and move on?
Q. Ive been in a monogamous relationship with a woman and we have recently decided to become more serious. As I get to know this person more I find out things that bother me. I'm sure there are things that bother her about me but what relationship ...
A. 14 January 2013: Sounds completely justified to me. Just make sure to break up with her in a responsible and caring way since she's not a bad person, just not right for you.
... (read in full...)
How can I satisfy her needs during sex?
Q. I am the first to admit that I'm not the best in bed, I can never seem to last long at all, with or without a condom. I'm worried that the lack of ability to satisfy my girlfriend's needs may be grating her the wrong way (tho I always make a point ...
A. 14 January 2013: I always see people here claim most women don't orgasm during sex but that's not been my experience. Not that it's not possible, but I wouldn't assume that's the case or she may be left unhappy.
An orgasm via sex makes people closer I think. If s... (read in full...)
My ex loves me more than his girlfriend. I don't know what to say the feelings are not returned
Q. So basically I went out with this guy two years ago - we'd been friends for a year or so before that. I have to admit that I wasn't CRAZY about him and I'd just got out of a really long relationship so it was half for rebound but needless to say we ...
A. 14 January 2013: You never actually said if you told him the truth: that you feel nothing for him.
Until you've done that there's nothing else to say. ... (read in full...)
How do I chose between 2 great guys? Stuck between a rock and a hard place
Q. I dated a guy for 6 mos....we'll call him Bob. Bob and I are both from military backgrounds, stable financially, both have one daughter and 2 grandkids and we're both in our 50's. I am an eternal optimist and a hopeful romantic. I am very ...
A. 14 January 2013: Nobody hear can really make that decision for you. But, one thing you haven't considered is dating the two of them and being open about it. Tell the new guy that he doesn't seem ready for a serious relationship and tell Bob that you want him to ... (read in full...)
GF went on holiday without me and packed her sexy lingerie. What does this mean?
Q. My girlfriend went on holiday without me, she says for a break from everything, but she took her sexy lingerie with her. When asked why, she replied that she did not even notice, just grabbed a handful of undies and packed them. What does this...
A. 13 January 2013: My instinct says that she's open to the idea of a romantic vacation fling.
Although there is certainly the possibility that she grabbed whatever was in her panty drawer, that seems a little hard to believe unless she was pressed for time.
... (read in full...)
GF went on holiday without me and packed her sexy lingerie. What does this mean?
Q. My girlfriend went on holiday without me, she says for a break from everything, but she took her sexy lingerie with her. When asked why, she replied that she did not even notice, just grabbed a handful of undies and packed them. What does this...
A. 13 January 2013: My instinct says that she's open to the idea of a romantic vacation fling.
Although there is certainly the possibility that she grabbed whatever was in her panty drawer, that seems a little hard to believe unless she was pressed for time.
... (read in full...)
I can't get over this mystery breakup.
Q. Hey guys, well, I'm trying to find the best advice on how to move on with my life or keep fighting for my true love. My ex girlfriend and I went out for 6 months and we were a decent couple, we never had big problems or any huge fights while we...
A. 13 January 2013: "I just dont know how to make her see how I really feel for her."
She doesn't care how you feel. Your relationship is over. Period. Getting rejected is hard but you won't be able to move on until you accept that there is nothing you can do to wi... (read in full...)
Why did he suddenly end the relationship when we were so happy? What should I do?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for a little over 5 months. We live 20 minutes apart and every night when I get off work I spend the night with him. We practically live together. We hardly fight, we have a great sexual relationship and he is very ...
A. 13 January 2013: First and foremost give him the week off he asked for. Sometimes people say they want to end things, but when it comes down to it they don't. However, if you start acting crazy you may make the decision for them.
So don't contact him at all. If ... (read in full...)
My GF doesn't want to lose her virginity until we're married, but that won't be for 10 years! What can we do?
Q. I have been together with my girlfriend for nearly a year. We both never had sex, we only experimented with foreplay etc.(Basically everything but just the most vital part, sex) She told me she will only be willing to do that once we get m...
A. 13 January 2013: This is a odd question to ask considering your options are obvious:
You leave her.
You wait and marry her in 10 years (yeah right).
You marry her whenever you decide you want to spend the rest of your life with her (not because you want... (read in full...)
Why do I get so angry with my boyfriend and say things I don't mean?
Q. Why do I get so mad at my boyfriend for no reason and say such hurtful things to him that I dont mean? I love him with all my heart I dont want to push him away from me. I can't seem to control my mouth when I get mad. He's really getting f...
A. 13 January 2013: Just get in the habit of not reacting right away whenever you get upset. As soon as you feel it coming on tell him you need a moment and then approach the situation when you're thinking straight.
My wife does the same and it doesn't matter h... (read in full...)
Can or have men been able to stop using Porn once they meet the woman who is the 'ONE'?
Q. Is there any men here who stopped using porn once they found a girlfriend who they thought was the one? Am I just dreaming here or can this happen? I have read about this happening as soon as they started the relationship. ...
A. 13 January 2013: What you read about was guys convincing their girls they didn't watch porn anymore.
Men and women see porn completely different in most cases, so it's not like cheating where both agree it's wrong, it's more like shopping too much where men thin... (read in full...)
I'd like to be exclusive, not FWB. Should I just stop sleeping with him?
Q. This guy and I have many mutual friends. For months we kept running into each other at parties and finally about 7 months later I kissed him out of nowhere. He explained to me how he had been trying to find out more about me for months and try to ...
A. 13 January 2013: Yeah I agree with honeypie, you should talk to him. Quitting having sex with him is game playing, especially if you both know you like each other. ... (read in full...)
I know she thinks I'm boring. Should I keep trying or just move on?
Q. A while back (about a month or so now) I met a girl who seemed pretty interseted in me. We would text back and forth basically every day. Only issues was that it would get more and more boring each day. I asked her if she wanted to do something the ...
A. 13 January 2013: Maybe you're no good at beginning relationships by texting. ... (read in full...)
My Bf will be so hurt. I cheated over Christmas with a work colleague. What should I do now?
Q. Need some advice,I understand if you judge me, I hate myself for it..... Me and my boyfriend of 2 years went through a miserable period over Christmas, felt really down about it. I had my works Christmas party where I found myself really drunk, ...
A. 12 January 2013: I reserve the judging for those who don't judge themselves.
If you HAVE to tell him then you have to. However don't feel obligated to tell him because the important thing is that you (hopefully) learned a lesson that a moment of pleasure is not w... (read in full...)
Should I talk to her in the mornings or look like a loner?
Q. Hello Ok basically every morning before school I wait for my bf (C) and his older bro (S) who is in 6th form to be dropped off and his bro's gf (K) who is in the year above but is the same age as me waits for them as well. The thing is we wait i...
A. 12 January 2013: You need to understand that awkward silences are only awkward if you let them be...
What I mean by that is that some silence is natural and if you're okay with that then it won't be awkward.
Just approach her and ask if she minds if you wait wit... (read in full...)
Was he trying to get closer to me? What’s going on with him?
Q. I have been having a casual sexual relationship with a guy for a while now. He said he wasn’t looking for a relationship and neither was I. We have been enjoying really great sex but the last time we met up he really confused me. Straight after...
A. 12 January 2013: Sounds pretty obvious to me. Why not give it a shot? ... (read in full...)
My Bf has gone on a vacation to Hawaii without me! When he returns should I make demands and set out my expectations?
Q. Hi Dear Cupiders, I really wanted to get some unbiased input from you all. I'll really try to make a long story short. There is a lot of history between my bf and I. We were together for 1.5 years, broke up because he cheated and left me for anot...
A. 12 January 2013: Sometimes people need to just get away and have some alone time; that's no reason to break up with them. My wife just went to see her sister in Switzerland by herself, leaving the kids and I at home for 3 weeks. I'm going alone to visit my brother ... (read in full...)
Online comments from girls: should I take notice? Does a guy's personality change girl's opinion or perceptions about a guy?
Q. When I asked girls (online) to rate me, the majority of them said I was okay but I wasn't their type of guy. One girl said I was okay but no panty dropper (kinda hurt my feelings). and a couple said I wasn't good looking. I wanted to hear the trut...
A. 12 January 2013: Personality and confidence are 1000 times more important than your looks.
A great looking person can be disgustingly ugly if their personality is and an ugly person can be beautiful.
You should have figured that out by now.
Asking peopl... (read in full...)
Should I tell my husband that I cheated on my ex with a co-worker? Or leave the past in the past?
Q. Been happily married for a few months after I'd been with my ex for a few years. Do you think I should tell my husband I cheated on my ex and had a six-month affair with a co-worker? Now I don't have any contacts with either my ex nor my former a...
A. 12 January 2013: So he thinks you are perfect and that's something you need to fix? Let him think that, it's a great feeling to feel that way for someone.
If you care about him why plant any seed of doubt that you'll be faithful to him?
This whole idea that peo... (read in full...)
She forgot about a pre-arranged date, again. Should we talk? Is she being unreasonable?
Q. Stupid argument? My girlfriend and I arranged to have a date night last night. She forgot about it once already, as the week progressed and she forgot about it once again last night. It's been a rather stressful week for her at work and personal...
A. 11 January 2013: That's a very difficult situation, one that I find my wife putting me in on occasion. In fact we had a date night ruined by stress recently as well. When I changed plans (no reason to spend a lot of money when a bad mood will ruin it anyways) ... (read in full...)
He's 39. Is he likely to lose interest in me, now that he's found out that I'm a virgin?
Q. I'm 22. I've been seeing an older guy for some time now. He's 39. Despite the age difference, we connect on various levels. He's an amazing guy and I want to get to know him more and more. But here's the thing. I'm a virgin and I'm pretty sure ...
A. 11 January 2013: Everybody knows that guys are turned off by the idea of being with a virgin. They hate knowing that no other guy has been with their girl before.
Sarcasm aside it may add a little bit of pressure, but what any good guy wants from sex is that it'... (read in full...)
Should I tell my husband that I cheated on my ex with a co-worker? Or leave the past in the past?
Q. Been happily married for a few months after I'd been with my ex for a few years. Do you think I should tell my husband I cheated on my ex and had a six-month affair with a co-worker? Now I don't have any contacts with either my ex nor my former a...
A. 11 January 2013: Hell no! ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is a model and I'm worried he will eventually get tired of being with a normal girl, plus we have different religious backgrounds. Are these real issues or am I being silly?
Q. Hi aunts and uncles, I am in need of some advice on a few issues with the one guy. I will give you some background information to my situation. So I am 32 and a year ago I met a guy who is 31, he chatted me up when I was out for the day in a...
A. 11 January 2013: Your friends are right you're being silly. He obviously likes you and flat out told you he was ready to settle down. Besides he probably got all his messing around out when he was younger.
I went through the same thing at his age. I didn't w... (read in full...)
Can short guys have success with women? And if so how? I need advice on how to cope better with my height.
Q. I am a 5'4" male and i am very insecure about my height. I know that women love tall guys and that most of them turn their noses at the thought of dating a guy as short as me. However, I also know that some guys my height and shorter do have suc...
A. 11 January 2013: I'm relatively tall so I don't have a ton of advice but you may try dating women from other cultures. At 5'4" you are totally average for a man of many parts of Central American, S. American and SE Asia.
Find a woman from there and she probably... (read in full...)
Is a brazilian wax worth the pain?
Q. So i'm really nervous now, I've booked myself in for a full Brazilian wax in a few days. But my friends have made me really nervous saying the pain is terrible!! I have a bad pain threshold, but I think of it as deal with the pain for something that ...
A. 11 January 2013: I don't have a preference for any particular type of pubic hair but I have to admit that men are very visual and so there is something special about the brazilian wax. ... (read in full...)
Saw my GF for the first time on Skype and she didn't look like her photo. Is she lying?
Q. So I have met my girlfriend about a year ago over the internet, big mistake. She said she does not date over the internet first time I asked her, then I won her heart and we have been together for a month now. She sent me pics of her but this mor...
A. 11 January 2013: You haven't been "together" for a month if you've never seen her in person. There is no reason to get too serious until you had a chance to meet her.
Sorry but you have to realize how this question sounds. I'm not trying to get down on you but it's... (read in full...)
Why did he string me along for 2 years?
Q. I started dated this guy 2 years ago. In the beginning everything was great. Then after couple of months he said we are taking it slow. So I have been patient. Then after 9 month dating I got a letter from him saying that he never broke up with the...
A. 11 January 2013: I agree, he didn't string you along, you strung yourself. You shouldn't trust people who disregard your feelings to look out for your best interests.
It's easy to say this when it's happening to someone else, but you need to remember that peo... (read in full...)
Some queries about my relationship. Should I go on the pill? He'd like oral sex but I'm not comfortable with it?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for a year. We have used condoms, and the pull out method , when we have had sex. He wants me to try using the pill. I'm nervous about it though, as I have never used it before (he is the only person I have had sex with ...
A. 11 January 2013: The most common side effects of the pill are temporary. Another positive thing about the pill is it will allow you two to be more "intimate" if you know what I mean.
If you've never orgasmed at the same time you're missing out on somethin... (read in full...)
In love with a girl who has another boyfriend. What should I do?
Q. I'm going through a very complicated relationship... I love her a lot.. I have been there with her for a quite long time about 8 months now.. She was my friend at first but I fell in love with her later on.. She had a bf and she loved him a lot.. bu...
A. 11 January 2013: Sorry, but I don't think there is much you can do until he dumps her. She is the type of girl that needs that type of guy.
You are great because she can't deal with her emotions all by herself, so she cries on your shoulder when she needs to... (read in full...)
Am I unreasonable to dislike the fact that my B/f' 5 year old son crawls into bed with us every morning, then fidgets, talks, crawls all over us?
Q. A brief question to all you helpful people... I'm in a great new(er) relationship that is fairly serious, and I have just moved in with my boyfriend, although I've been unofficially living with him for three months. My lease just expired, my thin...
A. 11 January 2013: My wife and I allow our two kids to do this. Occasionally we ask for space and maybe put a movie on for them to keep them entertained. If you expect to end it you're going to have a hurt little boy to deal with.
If you make a big deal out of i... (read in full...)
Boyfriend versus my ex. Why should I choose?
Q. I have been dating my Boyfriend for 5 months and recently I was texting to my ex-boyfriend,who I had dated longer than anyone, and my boyfriend at the same time. In the middle of texting I started to feel like my boyfriend was just a friend and that...
A. 11 January 2013: He's your ex for a reason. If your boyfriend is a good guy who takes care of you and makes you happy why trade that for someone who you've already found out isn't right for you?
However its totally normal. It's easy to remember the good things a... (read in full...)
How do I stop caring about women?
Q. Is there a way to shut down emotions? I am a guy who has only ever had one girlfriend, an ex now... and is still a virgin. I feel so much pressure to date many women and have sex to prove I am a man. In my relationship I treated her like a princess...
A. 11 January 2013: It is easy, I've done it myself. It only takes a couple of times being bold (but scared) and doing something like walking up to a girl you barely know and asking her out and hearing her say yes then later tell you how what you did was a turn on ... (read in full...)
I'm not sure if first time sex felt right?
Q. So I had sex for the first time last night and I have some questions, I apologize if this is a little explicit... I didn't feel any pain when he entered me, thankfully- my hymen was already broken through fingering and he knew what he was doin...
A. 11 January 2013: I'd say 99 times out of 100 first time sex is disappointing for women. Guys on the other hand its the other way around! ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend could have cheated, help?
Q. My new boyfriend of one month has basically been accused for cheating on me. What can I say? Thought I might of had a nice one but now I beleive I could be wrong. Basically he wen...
A. 11 January 2013: First of all, is your age accurate?
Second, a month isn't a lot of time to become totally committed... that's still the dating phase.
Third when someone is denying something, anger is a good sign. It upsets people to be accused of somet... (read in full...)
How do I stop caring about women?
Q. Is there a way to shut down emotions? I am a guy who has only ever had one girlfriend, an ex now... and is still a virgin. I feel so much pressure to date many women and have sex to prove I am a man. In my relationship I treated her like a princess...
A. 11 January 2013: You could ask a doctor to castrate you.
Your looks aren't the problem its your confidence. And when you have no confidence no girls want to be with you which ruins your confidence. Time to stop feeling sorry for yourself.
Ever heard of... (read in full...)
Should I tell my ex that I'm going to sleep with his room mate?
Q. My ex and I had kind of a terrible breakup. The issue was that he refused to cuddle with me at all and if I tried to touch him, he would recoil and physically shove me away, which made me feel really bad about myself. He also seemed to enjoy the ...
A. 11 January 2013: "I'm going to have sex with your roommate" isn't exactly how you should phrase it... maybe more along the lines of "Your roommate thought that it was a good idea to tell you that we've been dating."
Personally I wouldn't say a thing, what's t... (read in full...)
How does one get over being cheated on and the insecurity that comes with it?
Q. How does one get over the pain of being cheated on, and the insecurity that you will be cheated on in a new relationship? I have been cheated on by 3 separate men, all of whom I was involved in serious relationships with at the time. The last ...
A. 11 January 2013: I don't know a way to prevent it, but you can communicate your insecurities with him. Tell him what happened, tell him that you realize you don't have any reason not to trust him, and tell him how you are feeling.
If he is a mature communic... (read in full...)
I turned him away and now I miss the opportunity I had with him
Q. I feel like crying... There's this guy I was dating for a while, the first time ever that there was potential with anyone (and I'm 20), but all the while I felt like something was wrong, that I couldn't fall in love with him. He was so sweet, so ...
A. 11 January 2013: There's no way to know for sure if he still has feelings for you. It wouldn't surprise me if he did.
I had a girlfriend of 1.5 break up with me and change her mind relatively quickly. But by then it was too late. Although I wanted to be with her... (read in full...)
I turned him away and now I miss the opportunity I had with him
Q. I feel like crying... There's this guy I was dating for a while, the first time ever that there was potential with anyone (and I'm 20), but all the while I felt like something was wrong, that I couldn't fall in love with him. He was so sweet, so ...
A. 10 January 2013: You probably feel like crap because he rejected you. Rejection sucks, there's no doubt about it.
If it makes you feel better remember that you didn't exactly fall madly in love with the guy, so you're not heartbroken. ... (read in full...)
| *MMP's friends
These are mutual friends, so *MMP has
added them and they have added *MMP!
|
