We both have partners but I really like him, am I living in a fantasy world or should I make a move on this guy?
Q. I am in a relationship that is going nowhere. My partner, though a good father to our child is a non violent alcoholic whom is emotionally abusive. Though I love him, I don't believe I am in love with him anymore. A few months back I met a man ...
A. 12 September 2011: Your child is important, but don't lose sight of your own wants and needs. You deserve to be happy too.
In any event...you're very welcome and best of luck.
... (read in full...)
What does he mean by "What's the next thing after like, that's how I feel about you"?
Q. hello ive been seen a fellow for a year now and everything was fine when i first met him he said he didnt want a relationship and i was seen him a weekends now hes saying i dont ever invite him out to my house and its not going any where and when i ...
A. 11 September 2011: Inform him, matter of factly, that 'it's not going anywhere' because he stated plainly that he did not want a relationship. All the things he's complaining about not having/doing are the sorts of things one has/does in a relationship. Then ask him ... (read in full...)
I cant get a divorce! What can I do now?
Q. My husband does not love me. He is searching young girls for long term relationship keeping our marriage as it. He loves my education, property, and background, not me. He always harass me in front of his family and close friends. When I asked for ...
A. 10 September 2011: You're welcome.... (read in full...)
Does he sound like someone who could grow up and see me as the girl he could build a life with or should I just forget him altogether?
Q. Met an american man while I was traveling in africa (i am canadian), dated him for 3 months, "just to have fun". I was 27 and a virgin with a couple of serious past boyfriends, he was 23 and a non-virgin with lots of casual making out/fooling around ...
A. 10 September 2011: 'I decide not to go back and go back to school instead.' First paragraph, last sentence is where this story should have ended. So to answer your questions...no and yes.... (read in full...)
Sometimes I think this should be a no brainer to leave but my instint tells me to fight. Any thoughts?
Q. This could turn into a long story so i'll try to keep it short. I have been in a relationship for 4.5yrs in which we have lived toghether for 2yrs. It was perfect at the beginning. The last year however has been very rocky. We have not cheated...
A. 10 September 2011: I think it's your heart, not your instinct, that's telling you to fight and I always advise following one's head instead.
Your boyfriend is moving farther away from you and making overtures to other women. They may not be blatant sexual advances... (read in full...)
How? Is it possible to get my cat back as first priority? And get my ex boyfriend back too?
Q. Here is a brief paragraph of my situation. My ex and I broke up this month after a year relationship. We had a huge fight during a trip right before (this is our first huge fight, we were basically ignoring each other during the trip). When we ...
A. 10 September 2011: Have a list handy of all things you want back and send an email or leave him a telephone message when you expect he's not home. Offer to have a friend or family member pop round to pick them up, cat included, either with you or instead of you. ... (read in full...)
I love her . Loved helping her. But she hurts me so much. Does this sound like a relationship with a future?
Q. Hi, So Me (17) and my Gf (14) have been going out for 6 months, I have always done everything I could for her, Bought her games to play when her mum was drunk, Spent weekends out with her. Did everything I could for her. I even managed to get her ...
A. 10 September 2011: Break up with her and cut ties. You've done it several times already. You can do it again, this time for good.
Life is full of uncertainty, disappointment and setback. Assuming the responsibility for someone else's happiness is too big a burden f... (read in full...)
Is it better to distance yourself or to keep on trying after being rejected by a friend?
Q. SO i have this friend. I asked her out/told her I liked her and she said that she was not rejecting me but literally had no time to make it work, so it would be unfair to the both of us. She said that maybe in the future something may happen but not ...
A. 10 September 2011: The first option is to punish her now and give up hope for a future. The second is to delay punishing her on the condition that she accepts your advances later. Either way this 'amazing' friend is going to pay. It may not be your intent but that's ... (read in full...)
How can I convince my Boyfriend to help me get pregnant even though he does not need to help me bring the baby up?
Q. i need help... hi i am asking your help to convinceing my bf to get me pregnant but its not working. he does not want to have children or get marryed but i would like to some day soon for children and marry later on... he is 27 and i am 19 i k...
A. 10 September 2011: Your boyfriend has every right to pursue the kind of life he wants for himself and you have no right to swindle or coerce him out of it. He has made the decision that's right for him and you'll just have to accept it. Children want and ... (read in full...)
Does what he's saying mean that he's been cheating?
Q. Hey everyone, I have a quick question. I have been with my boyfriend for almost two years. 9 months out of the year its long distance when he goes away to school. The other months he's home which is half an hour away from me at most. Anyways...
A. 9 September 2011: He isn't hinting that he's been cheating. He's making reference to the possibility that YOU might. This was in response to your own veiled threat about going behind his back.
In fact if HE had been the one to describe this scenario to us, we might... (read in full...)
What do you think when you hear a guy has never had a relationship and he's now 30 years old?
Q. hi there. i only need advice from woman in order to get the right answers. im turning 30 next month and have never had a long term relationship. longest ever was 3 months. i have slept with probably 50 woman at least so getting a girl to date isnt ...
A. 9 September 2011: I would not draw any conclusions based on that fact alone. There are plenty of men and women out there who, for a variety of reasons, haven't been in a long term relationship.
What I knew of your past, and more importantly, how you conducte... (read in full...)
My ex has forgotten when my birthday is. Do I have a right to be peeved or am I making a big deal of nothing?
Q. My ex and me were together for just under six months. It's been several months now since we broke up. We've tried to be friends since then but it has been difficult for me because she ended it and then got a new boyfriend soon after. Anyway, t...
A. 9 September 2011: Not that you owed even this much but your promise was to TRY and you did. It's not working for you. ... (read in full...)
Facebook relationship status. Distant boyfriend. Post break-up issues.
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for over a year. He used to be the sweetest guy and as soon as we god together he changed his relationship status on Facebook to In a Relationship, he would always come to see me, he would write sweet messages ...
A. 9 September 2011: You're very welcome and glad to be of help.
You get through the next few days by remembering what you'll gain staying away from him. You won't have the insecurity of being with someone you suspect doesn't really want you. An end to the fighting... (read in full...)
Is being a slut the way to mend a broken heart???
Q. Hi again Aunt/ uncle agonies. Thanks in advance for taking the time to read. I am going through an awful breakup, and all i wanna do is move on. I've been getting advice from all my friend on how to achieve this, but for some odd reason every sug...
A. 9 September 2011: Getting male attention provides momentary pleasure but sometimes it does help to know or be reminded that others find you appealing and that you have options in the future.
When you're ready, there is nothing wrong with going out on dates with men... (read in full...)
Should I dump my b/f because he isn't sympathetic when I'm having my period?
Q. My boyfriend isnt sympathetic when i am on my period, should i dump him ?. He calls me moody and says that he wont put up with the way i am every month when its my time of the month. I get severe cramps and it really gets me down. I know men dont ...
A. 9 September 2011: What exactly would you like him to say or do when you're on your period? Of the two of you you're the expert and if, after all these years of having them, you still don't know how to make it easier for yourself, how is he supposed to? Menstruat... (read in full...)
What is going on? Should I get a lawyer?
Q. I told My separated husband, I'm pregnant by someone else. He said it didn't matter. We went on meanwhile he was seeing someone else. He needed his car fix and I gave him the money. Later he broke it off and said he wanted the divorce. Constantly he ...
A. 8 September 2011: Absolutely! The fact that you have an advantage is his problem, not yours. You don't sacrifice that advantage just to be fair. This is not a game. ... (read in full...)
Should I keep this baby? I've already had 2 abortions but I think I want to keep this one, but my boyfriend isnt supportive...
Q. hi everyone. I am in a big dilemma. I just found out that I am pregnant. The problem is that my boyfriend is not supportive at all. He actually says that he doesnt want a baby with me.. I have already had two abortions, the last one in february. I ...
A. 8 September 2011: I think your parents will wonder why you still give this guy the time of day, let alone keep him around as a boyfriend. He's absolutely useless. He doesn't want children right now. Fair enough, but to leave you swinging in the breeze to face t... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has no insecurity concerning me! I wish he'd be a little more protective...
Q. This may not seem like a huge problem but my boyfriend has no insecurity concerning me. He doesn't mind if I hang out with boys, even ones who fancy me. He just says he trusts me. I wish he'd be a little more protective. ...
A. 8 September 2011: The only thing insecurity in a partner can give us is greater power in the relationship or a huge headache. Instead of (or maybe in addition to) having a lot of power, it sounds like you have a lot of freedom, which is just as valuable.
'Prot... (read in full...)
We both have partners but I really like him, am I living in a fantasy world or should I make a move on this guy?
Q. I am in a relationship that is going nowhere. My partner, though a good father to our child is a non violent alcoholic whom is emotionally abusive. Though I love him, I don't believe I am in love with him anymore. A few months back I met a man ...
A. 8 September 2011: As I see it, one man isn't any better for you than the other. They've both made commitments elsewhere and are unavailable to you. Your husband to booze. Your friend to his girlfriend.
It isn't your place to determine the strength or validity... (read in full...)
A friend that hugs all the time?
Q. hey aunts! I have a little problem, theres a friend of mine that i like but im not sure if he likes me back so please help!!! So, he loves to hug me and we could hug for hours without saying anything, then, for my birthday, he made me a cake that he ...
A. 8 September 2011: It looks that way.
If your only interest in him is as a friend, then I suggest you make that clear to him.
Do not ask him if he fancies you as that sets him up for rejection and humiliation. Be matter of fact and tell him you enjoy this frien... (read in full...)
Facebook relationship status. Distant boyfriend. Post break-up issues.
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for over a year. He used to be the sweetest guy and as soon as we god together he changed his relationship status on Facebook to In a Relationship, he would always come to see me, he would write sweet messages ...
A. 8 September 2011: 'So I told him that if he wanted to keep doing everything as if we were a couple, we would have to be a couple.' THAT is what you should have done in the very beginning. If you had, you'd be happier today. Your insecurity is not the result o... (read in full...)
Why is my partner ringing his ex in the middle of the night?
Q. I have been with my partner for over 2 years and our wedding is booked. He owns a house with his ex and is in the process of selling it. She has been a nightmare through the whole thing and we have had to go to court and all sorts. Finally she is ...
A. 8 September 2011: I don't think you have anything to worry about at this point. He's been transparent in his dealings with her. There has been hostility between them and the contact they have is sort their affairs and not have a reason to keep in touch.
... (read in full...)
I love her but she said there is nothing on her side, what should I do now? Is she just being shy and she actually does like me?
Q. hi friends and i am a student of 12th class well the problem is that i like a girl in my class since 6-7 months and most probably now started loving her so firstly she used to talk to me very frankly but from last 3-4 months she doesnt talk t...
A. 8 September 2011: She's not being shy with you. She isn't interested. Leave her alone and move on. Your feelings for her will eventually fade.... (read in full...)
Why did he tell me he liked the head massages I give him and then go get one elsewhere?
Q. Hi, I would like you aunts opinion on this please,and if i'm being silly and just over reacting. I have been in a relationship for over 7yrs with the same man, he always tells me how good he feels when he is with me,and how relaxed he is when i g...
A. 8 September 2011: Yes, you're being silly and over reacting.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend substituted me for my sister!
Q. Hi I just need advice on this thing that happened recently my boyfriend sent a text to my sister just out of the blue and says that he's liked her for a long time even before me and him got together and because my sister had a relationship at that ...
A. 8 September 2011: Get rid of him, both as a boyfriend and as a friend.
This young man doesn't deserve the courtesy of being officially dumped. Just move on, without a word, and let him figure it out.
Do not contact or respond to him. Ever.... (read in full...)
How do you find the inner strength to help people?
Q. I just want to let everyone know that I have been on this site for at least 4 years and its been the best site from heaven.... I have been troubled by my broken marriage and have a hard time putting things together ....how do you people do it ...ju...
A. 7 September 2011: We benefit from helping others. Sometimes it's harder to solve our own problems because we're too close to them. Assisting someone else with theirs can give us a new perspective of our own.
It is also very empowering to be the one giving and help... (read in full...)
What did he mean exactly by this statement?
Q. I am still trying to get past my husband's cheating on me with other women he was meeting on internet dating sites for 5 years. This I have known about for 2 years and he stopped doing it and is trying to work on the marriage. Today I broke ...
A. 7 September 2011: Yes, it sounds like he means emotional punching bag and he thinks you'll take your frustration out on your children (not physically).
He may have felt brave or desperate enough to say it, but backed down to avoid an argument when you question... (read in full...)
He gets mad when I don't want sex!
Q. Hey guys, i'm 15 and basically i've been with my 16 year old boyfriend for 3 and a half months now, and we started having sex 2 months into our relationship. since then we've had it 37 times. I don't know if its right but I feel completely taken for ...
A. 7 September 2011: Dump this fool. You are being taken for granted. Even at age 16 this is far beneath his age.
This young man sounds incredibly selfish, reckless, boorish and boring.... (read in full...)
Why is my mom so upset about the way my husband and I treat each other?
Q. Hello, I am a 31 year old married woman. You have given me great advice in the past. Here is my problem: This is a little long with background. My father and my husband get along great. My dad usually calls him, son, when he talks to him; ...
A. 6 September 2011: Another reason why they have difficulty accepting it may be the most obvious. The vast majority of women who submitted to their husbands were, after years of thankless servitude, overwhelmed, exhausted, unfulfilled and resentful (then traded in for ... (read in full...)
Second chance? promises? what are the chances the relationship will last this time?
Q. If a couple who have been together only a yr. or so have a lot of issues throughout their relationship end up breaking up and then 2 mths. later decide to reunite without really working through these issues, can this relationship survive the second ...
A. 6 September 2011: Highly unlikely. If unresolved issues were bad enough to cause a break up, then they'll be bad enough to cause another.
No one can put a time frame on that. It could be days, weeks or months. The best way to avoid the uncertainty and broken p... (read in full...)
I hate doing the thing that is his number one turn on! What can I do?
Q. I hate being fingered/fingering myself and I know it's the biggest thing that turns on my bf as that's the sort of porn he watches. We have sex a lot and stuff. However, I feel this kinda pressure to finger myself for him [he doesn't ask] because I ...
A. 6 September 2011: The problem isn't that you dislike 'doing his number one thing', but that you're this upset about it.
Having a desire does not entitle a person to having it fulfilled, no matter how nice they are. Disappointement is not life altering. Your boy... (read in full...)
Why is my mom so upset about the way my husband and I treat each other?
Q. Hello, I am a 31 year old married woman. You have given me great advice in the past. Here is my problem: This is a little long with background. My father and my husband get along great. My dad usually calls him, son, when he talks to him; ...
A. 6 September 2011: People who have been, or belong to a group who has been, mistreated in the past are more sensitive to mistreatment in the present, real or imagined. Strength in numbers is what allows the underdog to bring about social changes. Members of that ... (read in full...)
Mum has outstayed her welcome but she has nowhere else to go!
Q. my 79 year old mum has got a fear of living on her own and spending nights on her own. she is fit and well for her age, she does not even look 79, she is not like a frail old lady. when i had my baby and got a house of my own and moved out she mo...
A. 6 September 2011: When I said 'I believe it is illegal in any western jurisdiction for a grown woman to be sharing a bed with an adolescent boy.' I should have said it might be legally questionable for a grown woman to share a bed with an adolescent boy on a regular ... (read in full...)
How can I make my co-worker interested in me again?
Q. What should I do about him? is he mad at me? i really like him:(? There's this guy at my workplace. He stares at me when am not looking. He was really nice and friendly with me. So I gave him my number and he even rang me a few times when...
A. 6 September 2011: I'm surprised you even need to ask this question.
You stood the man up without so much as an explanation or an apology. Then ignored him when he rang you and you're wondering what's wrong with HIM?
His past relationship has nothing to with ... (read in full...)
Mum has outstayed her welcome but she has nowhere else to go!
Q. my 79 year old mum has got a fear of living on her own and spending nights on her own. she is fit and well for her age, she does not even look 79, she is not like a frail old lady. when i had my baby and got a house of my own and moved out she mo...
A. 6 September 2011: If I'm not mistaken, somewhere in your post you mentioned something about your mum going home. Does this mean she has a home, but chooses not to live in it? You're right about not being able to change who your mother is, but taking advantage... (read in full...)
What is going on? Should I get a lawyer?
Q. I told My separated husband, I'm pregnant by someone else. He said it didn't matter. We went on meanwhile he was seeing someone else. He needed his car fix and I gave him the money. Later he broke it off and said he wanted the divorce. Constantly he ...
A. 6 September 2011: Absolutely get a lawyer! Courts tend to favour the mother and the only hope he has of being granted any kind of custody is to prove you are unfit. He's got an uphill battle ahead of him. When custody is settled child support payments are based... (read in full...)
I cant get a divorce! What can I do now?
Q. My husband does not love me. He is searching young girls for long term relationship keeping our marriage as it. He loves my education, property, and background, not me. He always harass me in front of his family and close friends. When I asked for ...
A. 6 September 2011: Have you actually spoken to a lawyer about this? It sounds like you're making assumptions based on fear.
If you have the means to get out of this marriage, and I think you do, then end it. You're a young woman and this is no way to spend the rest... (read in full...)
We are not official - can we date other people?
Q. Heya I have a quick question I,ve been dating a young man for nearly two months now. We're not officially girlfriend and boyfriend. He hasn't been with another girl since we met but since we're just dating is it ok for him to be with other girls...
A. 5 September 2011: After two months of dating I suggest you iron this out with him. He may be assuming you're exclusive and if so he won't appreciate you seeing other men.
If you're worried about coming across as clingy or pushy for asking then don't. It's a perfer... (read in full...)
| *iar's friends
These are mutual friends, so *iar has
added them and they have added *iar!
|
