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Will the Doctor respect my privacy or is it likely that the Doctor will tell my Mom that I'm not a virgin?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Dating, Family, Health, Sex, Teenage, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (6 October 2014) 8 Answers - (Newest, 6 October 2014)
A female United States age 26-29, anonymous writes:

I'm 17 and my bf and I got carried away in the moment and so three days ago I lost my virginity.

My mom is making me go to the doctor for a yeast infection. I know they will ask if I have had sex without my mom in there but can they tell her I'm not a virgin?

This is why I was going to wait till I was eighteen -.- I'm still sore and it hurts to pee because it was just recently and now with an infection it's worse.

I wanted to try a natural remedy but she is for Is forcing me to go later today help

View related questions: lost my virginity

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A female reader, Tisha-1 United States +, writes (6 October 2014):

Tisha-1 agony auntDid you tell the doctor you are sexually active? This is important information for her to know. Lots of people try to hide things from their doctors because they are embarrassed or worried about being judged or what you feared that your doctor would tell your mom you are sexually active. This sometimes means that the doctor doesn't have all the information she or he needs to know in order to protect your health and well-being.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (6 October 2014):

My father persuaded my doctor to give him information about me. And my Dad didn't tell me, until months later, that he'd done this.

I felt this was unforgivable of both the doctor and my Dad. I was eighteen and I'd asked to go on the pill.

My father was so over-controlling and did not respect boundaries. If you think this will be the case with your Mum then I would absolutely double-check before you go to the doctor that there is no way they can tell your Mum your private business.

Looking back, I wish I'd sued the doctor involved. Legally he was not allowed to do what he did, but he did it anyway - my father was an extremely persuasive and manipulative man whilst seeming not to be.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (6 October 2014):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

It isn't that I can't fess up to being sexually active but I don't want her to find out that way. I made my bf use a condom so no worries about stds. I went to the doc today and it is just a yeast infection. Thanks for the responses.

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (6 October 2014):

So_Very_Confused agony auntI want to add that while it's ok to use OTC yeast meds once you know what a yeast infection is like, your FIRST one needs to be diagnosed by a doctor.

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A female reader, WhenCowsAttack United States +, writes (6 October 2014):

Hmm, yeast infections are easily cured with over the counter meds, I have to step in and say it is entirely possible you have an STD. Also, in my experience they aren't painful. You might want to come clean in case it isn't a yeast infection.

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (6 October 2014):

So_Very_Confused agony auntwhen my (step) daughter was 15 I took her to the GYN.

the doctor would not permit me in the exam room. Even id my daughter wanted it (we were close and had no secrets).

the doctor would NOT discuss anything with me about her even though I had the child's permission and medical power of attorney over a minor.

it it burns to pee it's probably a UTI and not yeast.

there is NO home remedy that will fix UTI. You must see the doctor.

IF you are old enough to be sexual with a boy you are old enough to own up to it. Be responsible.. see the doctor, get on birth control.

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A female reader, Tisha-1 United States +, writes (6 October 2014):

Tisha-1 agony auntOn the plannedparenthood.org site, I found this link: ing-to-the-doctor/what-to-expect

"Will my doctor keep my information private?

Most doctors and nurses don’t tell your parents (or anyone else) the stuff you tell them. Planned Parenthood health centers always try to provide confidential (private), high-quality services without judgment for everyone, including teens.

But sometimes they may not be able to guarantee complete privacy, depending on the laws where you live, or the particular health care provider you’re seeing. It’s a good idea to ask about privacy policies when you make your appointment.

If you use health insurance to pay, a statement might come in the mail describing the services you had. If you’re on a parent’s or anyone else’s health insurance and you’re worried about confidentiality, call the insurance company to ask about their privacy policies. You can also always call your nearest Planned Parenthood health center to see what free or low-cost services they can provide for you.

So my advice would be to call the local clinic and ask them the question about privacy as it sounds like it may vary from state to state. Here's how to find the local clinic: http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-center

And I have to agree with Honeypie. If you can't 'fess up that you are sexually active, then you aren't old enough to be sexually active just yet.

If it hurts to pee and you have a yeast infection you definitely should see a doctor. If you are sexually active then you should definitely see your doctor.

It's time to find your courage and be mature about it. Good luck!

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (6 October 2014):

Honeypie agony auntNo the doctor can't tell her unless you want her to know. Just ask her to wait in the waiting room you want to go in alone. You are 17 and she doesn't HAVE to go with with you.

It could be UTI and not a yeast infection so you REALLY need to see the doctor.

And, honey... IF you can't OWN that fact that you are sexually active, then you aren't old enough to BE sexually active.

I hope you and your BF used a condom AT least.

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