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Boyfriend dumped me but when I date someone new he wants me back again

Tagged as: Big Questions, Breaking up, Dating, Teenage, The ex-factor, Three is a crowd, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (26 August 2017) 6 Answers - (Newest, 28 August 2017)
A female United States age 22-25, anonymous writes:

So I've been dating this guy for a month but I've been starting to have dreams about my ex who I dated for a year and a half, he was a guy i could never forget but he dumped me but he keeps trying to get back together all the time and when I'm with someone he seems interested in me but when I'm single he doesn't want to date anyone. Now that I'm with someone he's been talking more to be on how he wants to be with me and I get all conflicted because I really liked him he made me feel all types of ways, and sometimes when he says things I cry bc I miss him. But I'm with someone else. What should I do? Leave my guy right now to be with my ex? Or leave It alone and be happy with my guy right now.

View related questions: get back together, my ex

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A male reader, Riot2017 Mexico +, writes (28 August 2017):

ESTABLISH A NO-CONTACT POLICY.

STOP TALKING WITH YOUR EX. NO EMAILS, NO FACEBOOK, NO CALLS, NO SNAPCHATS, NO TEXT MESSAGES, NOTHING.

You need to get over him, and he needs to get over you.

It seems like he wants to sabotage your relationships, but he does not feels nothing for you because as soon as you go back to him he dumps you.

THIS IS A TOXIC PERSON, PLEASE AVOID HIM LIKE THE PLAGUE!

Best luck!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (26 August 2017):

Stay with the guy you're with. You have to learn to let go of exes. Even when they try to breakup your new relationship; just so he can dump you again.

You have to show your ex he can't manipulate you by your feelings. He does that because he's jealous, and trying to own you. He treats you like an old toy he puts in the corner when he's tired of you. You run back to him like a weak little girl who can't make up her mind. It's a game he always wins!

You already know it's what he's doing. Don't ask for advice if you're going to right back and let him do it again and again.

You have to teach boys to respect you. Stop letting old feelings numb our brain, and let them treat you like you're not too smart.

You can't be a baby if you want to date boys. You have to show boys you are smart and strong. Even when your heart tells you to do the dumbest thing. Going back to him only to get dumped again. Don't make it a habit.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (26 August 2017):

Thank you guys, my friends tell me the same thing but I never really believed her since she never liked my ex to begin with.

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A female reader, Youcannotbeserious United Kingdom + , writes (26 August 2017):

Youcannotbeserious agony auntI assume your ex was your first real boyfriend, given your age. First partners are always special and difficult to get over, especially for females. You were very young when you were in the relationship and, hence, everything you experienced together will have been very special.

However, he is playing you. He doesn't REALLY want you back BUT he doesn't want anyone else to have you either.

In your shoes, I would block him so he can't contact you and carry on with your life. Don't be tempted to go back unless you are convinced he has matured and is offering you something solid.

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A male reader, judgedick France +, writes (26 August 2017):

judgedick agony auntHe is manipulating you,

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A female reader, Aunty BimBim Australia +, writes (26 August 2017):

Aunty BimBim agony auntYour rotten sod of an ex boyfriend sure has you dangling like a puppet on a string.

He is manipulating you, pulling the strings to make sure you wont be happy with somebody else, even though he dumped you.

I'll let you in on a little secret ... you are under NO OBLIGATION to talk to your ex boyfriend. You say you wont forget he dumped you .... that's good, keep remembering that and next time he contacts you to try and get back together make sure that memory is front and foremost in your mind.

Tell him you don't have time to talk and end the conversation .... hang up or block his number. If he is attempting to talk face to face its the same thing, tell him you don't have time and walk away.

It might take a while but if you are consistent he will get he message and move onto his next victim.

Good luck.

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