| Latest articles: Relationships: An Observational Assumption
This question has 14 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
2 January 2011: I was revising physics when an epiphany struck me that made me realize something potentially significant about the high rates of failure in cross-gender relationships, that is male and female companionship( and if you're wondering what the ...
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I feel betrayed by what I thought was my good catholic wife!
Q. I recently went to my wifes 20th high school reunion. I was ok with the fact that some of my wife's ex-boyfriends were there and unfortunately I personally know them all. My problem began when i read the last wills and tenaments from their senior ...
A. 20 July 2010: Retroactive jealousy my ass, you have a right to feel the way you feel. That said, you need to understand that, although your feelings of betrayal are justified, you weren't ACTUALLY betrayed per say.
All technicalities considered, you were und... (read in full...)
I find this strange but also erotic what should I do?
Q. my sister moved back to my house, not working just lazing around the house. she loves watching porno, we don't have any kids, but sometimes i come home from work early and she is masterbating. I find this strange but also erotic. what should I ...
A. 20 July 2010: It's a common erotic taboo, but super uncomfortable for you regardless i'd imagine. Tell her too sharpen her privacy skills. It's gonna be akward, but then again, it's akward already.... (read in full...)
She won't have sex till she knows me better?
Q. Hello just a quick question, what does it mean when a girl says that she won't have sex with me untill she knows me better? does this imply she's after something deeper then just a 'one night of naughtiness?' or does it mean something else?...
A. 20 July 2010: OP, the implication you suggested is exactly what it means.... (read in full...)
REAL Love!
Q. I have written this blog a few times but I thought I'd write it in an "article", that way people can always view it. To love a person, first and foremost you must KNOW them personally. Lots of teenagers say they "love" a celebrity or are "in love"...
A. 19 July 2010: Actually, I think teenage love is real love. It's more frequent, but just as real. Consider this: a person can feel love at any age just as they can feel anger, sorrow, remourse or excitement. Love can be a long term or short term feeling, with ... (read in full...)
I'm really worried he'll cheat on me with her... help!
Q. I have only been with my boyfriend for 3 months now and the first month was brilliant with no arguments whatsoever. Going into the second month facebook began to cause arguments with the way he commented on other girls statuses. They weren't extreme ...
A. 19 July 2010: Honestly, I don't think it's relevant to know whether he's cheating or not. If you're feeling uncomfortable at 3 months, the road ahead isn't likely to have disimilar speed bumps and obstacles. Really, I think you should be deciding whether or not ... (read in full...)
I'm growing bored of my boyfriend...
Q. I've been dating my bf for 2 years now. I've grown bored of him. I had an emotional affair for 4 months, but ended it when I decided I wanted to stay loyal to my bf. I've tried to rekindle the romance, I've tried special dates, new activities, ...
A. 19 July 2010: Yeah, you should move on. This is one of those scenerios in which the bad guy isn't necessarily one of the individuals involved in the relationship's fault, but just a depletion of interest overtime. This is, however, proof that whatever you saw in ... (read in full...)
How do anonymous flings and oral sex differ from having sex with someone you know?
Q. One of the hardest aspects of my being able to accept, get over, and not think about my wife's one night fling (she gave and received oral sex with a total stranger who was much older than her - she didn't, still doesn't know his name) is to ...
A. 4 June 2010: I just want to good luck. Hope our combined efforts suffice.... (read in full...)
How do anonymous flings and oral sex differ from having sex with someone you know?
Q. One of the hardest aspects of my being able to accept, get over, and not think about my wife's one night fling (she gave and received oral sex with a total stranger who was much older than her - she didn't, still doesn't know his name) is to ...
A. 1 June 2010: You're right, your real test is acceptance. I think you're on the right track now poster. As for whether you should want to understand, well, that's something that's in your nature. This whole thread is allegorical to your situation; you keep ... (read in full...)
How do anonymous flings and oral sex differ from having sex with someone you know?
Q. One of the hardest aspects of my being able to accept, get over, and not think about my wife's one night fling (she gave and received oral sex with a total stranger who was much older than her - she didn't, still doesn't know his name) is to ...
A. 1 June 2010: Oh yeah, in terms of sexual substance, fries are nice, but they much nicer with ketchup. You can have sex with anyone and feel intense physical pleasure, prostitutes proved that. However, if you have an emotional attraction to the person(ketchup), ... (read in full...)
How do anonymous flings and oral sex differ from having sex with someone you know?
Q. One of the hardest aspects of my being able to accept, get over, and not think about my wife's one night fling (she gave and received oral sex with a total stranger who was much older than her - she didn't, still doesn't know his name) is to ...
A. 1 June 2010: Your respect and affection for her and her integrity is contributing to your dilemma because you can't understand why she abused it, especially when you work hard to defend it. Meanwhile, she's trying to stay by your side whilst you struggle to ... (read in full...)
I need him, he is my Romeo... help!
Q. i just got busted for sneaking my boyfriend over to my house today to hang. My grandma's finace called my mom and she was pissed off, so she is taking my phone so i can not text or call him and we are in love. we made out an had clothes sex behind ...
A. 1 June 2010: You can't.
She hated him PRIOR to the inncedent?
You can't.
... (read in full...)
Why can guys not learn to communicate properly???
Q. I have this guy who is a friend we mail/text back and forth almost on a daily basis, then today outta nowhere he is like an anti christ . . He is hung over but surely thats not going to change him into a nasty piece of work is it???? Why is it...
A. 1 June 2010: Yeah, okay. What you really mean is why can't he communicate properly and why do you feel you need to keep texting or mailing him.
Generalising annoys me.
Mail Male Man. ... (read in full...)
How do anonymous flings and oral sex differ from having sex with someone you know?
Q. One of the hardest aspects of my being able to accept, get over, and not think about my wife's one night fling (she gave and received oral sex with a total stranger who was much older than her - she didn't, still doesn't know his name) is to ...
A. 31 May 2010: No, there's nothing to be jealous of. Your relationship with your wife, both generally and sexually, has more substance than the "old gyeser encounter" ever. Lets ignore my previous over thought answer and boil it down to this: the fling was ... (read in full...)
How do anonymous flings and oral sex differ from having sex with someone you know?
Q. One of the hardest aspects of my being able to accept, get over, and not think about my wife's one night fling (she gave and received oral sex with a total stranger who was much older than her - she didn't, still doesn't know his name) is to ...
A. 31 May 2010: Here's my theory:
There are a lot more politics involved with sex when it includes a known individual rather than a stranger. Subconsciously (and I really mean subconsciously because no one thinks straight whilst they hump) people consider... (read in full...)
Face or personality? What attracts you, guys?
Q. For all of you males out there. Which one of these do you think is most important for a girl to have? beautiful face, nice body or good personality? which one is most important?...
A. 30 May 2010: I can't approach a girl who isn't facially attractive to me, and I once I approach who IS facially attractive girl, I can't stay with her is she doesn't have an awesome personality about her.
Body and face,for me, kinda go hand in hand to a certai... (read in full...)
He sees her as much more than a friend, should I let her know?
Q. Okay, so being the caring friend that I am, i really feel that I need to step in and help a mate, but first I need you guys to help me. Basically, my mate (I'll call him Bob for the purposes of this) has a female friend, Katie (again not her real...
A. 30 May 2010: Yeah, it's like a room full dynamite and match-sticks, stay out of it. This is an example of a common mistake made by many good friends.They assume that their duty is stop the glass from breaking when, in reality, all they can really do is pick up ... (read in full...)
We are arguing over pointless things. I don't want to lose him!
Q. My boyfriend and I have been having problems lately. We've been dating for five months and I know I'm in love with him. We have been so happy, until a couple weeks ago. I really don't know what happened. I just fell under alot of stress and press...
A. 29 May 2010: What Jessmca said.... (read in full...)
What's the right approach to ask her to be my girl?
Q. I've known this girl for about 3 years and she just broke up with her bofriend about 2 weeks ago and during those 2 weeks and still continuing we have been hanging out 3-4 hrs after school, we also hang out during school. she is always close by me, ...
A. 29 May 2010: First and fore-most, yes, I concur completely with the first anonymous poster's input. Secondly, but more fore-most than the first fore-most, tell her ASAP. You need to make your feelings towards her SUPER clear, because if she thinks you're co... (read in full...)
My wife won't give me a blowjob!!!!
Q. I'd like to start by confirming I m 32 not 21. So this is my problem... My wife don't want to give me a blowjob anymore because she says she doesn't like it. I'm going down on her all the time because that's the only way that she can have multiple...
A. 29 May 2010: Going down on your wife because you know she likes it is very nice and selfless of you. Unfortunately, it doesn't mean she's obliged to return the favor. She damn sure should be, but she ain't. Think about it like so: you don't need a blow job to ... (read in full...)
Do boys prefer girls that have a tan?
Q. hello aunties and uncles. got a question that I really want answered. do boys prefer girls with a tan? I don't tan at all and I was wondering if boys do like girls who don't tan. I've tried fake tan and the colour was nice and it was a nice even ...
A. 23 May 2010: Hi, I'm a guy. Personally, and I'm sure the majority of boys my age will concur, I am more concerned about other more appealing and pleasing body features( innuendo intended)other than the presence, or absence, of a tan.
... (read in full...)
Will any man love an ashamed ex-prostitute?
Q. I am from an abusive family and at the age of 16 I ran away from home. I am ashamed to admit this but I turned to prostitution. I did this for a few months. It is a dark depressing period in my life. I eventually moved in with a friend from ...
A. 21 April 2010: Yeh, I don't think "I used to be a prostitute" will ever need to come up in a conversation. Will any man love an ashamed ex-prostitute? That's debatable, but that's not what you are. You're a young woman who went through tough times and got her s**t ... (read in full...)
Is eight guys too many?
Q. this is kind of stupid to ask but i just want to know people's opinion (go easy please :P) i am 18 and over the last 2 years i have had sex with 8 guys. is that too many? does that make me a slut? only 3 of the guys was i in any sort of relationship ...
A. 21 April 2010: No, it's fine. Eight simultaneously, potential problem. Over two years, fair enough.... (read in full...)
He's talks big about sexcapades, but he doesn't come through in the bedroom!
Q. Why does my new boyfriend talk big but not act on it? I've been seeing this guy a few months. He lately has been descriptive of what he wants to do to me in bed. He says things like "I wanna Butt F* u" or "are you ready to get on all fours and purr ...
A. 19 April 2010: "Get on all fours and purr like cat", I might use that.
I do concur with most of what's been said, it's difficult for some people, girls and guys alike, to translate awesome verbal intentions into reality. It could be because porn makes it look ... (read in full...)
Friends vs lovers - you women mix us guys up!!
Q. What is it with you women? I know it's a woman's option to change her mind, but.... Poor guys on here get so mixed up by you lot! Half the time you tell us to "hang in there, be their friend" when we like someone but the other person is with s...
A. 19 April 2010: My friend, never "hang in there" until she's ready because that makes you a desperate pirate on her feminine noose. Do not friends with her, because then you become the friend she goes to when the guy whose in her pants hurts her feelings. You ... (read in full...)
I'm worried I might have set my standards too high and I will never meet anyone who is right for me!
Q. Hello, I hope you guys can help. I am almost 25 and a virgin. I can't quite find anyone who is good enough to a) have sex with b) have a REAL relationship with. It's just that I feel as if I have waited for the right guy but all the m...
A. 19 April 2010: The perfect guy is still a virgin at 25?
... (read in full...)
I don't think I'm girlfriend material
Q. im 19 and want a boyfriend im fed up of feeling alone. when i go out i do get boys coming up to me and do text them for a while but it never comes to a realionship and i always feel worse when this happens. what do i do wrong? or am i not girlfiend ...
A. 18 April 2010: If guys approach you, the whole "am I attractive" thing is a non-issue. The problem could be anything from guys not liking your personality to guys thinking you're too good for them. The crap thing about relationship dry-spells is that you start to ... (read in full...)
Why does he send his ex vids of us having sex?
Q. Why does my boyfriend do this? He is still in close contact with his ex. They had a long distance relationship for 3 years and they still talk and text pretty regular. I know he sometimes sends her vids and pics of US having sex or...he does thi...
A. 17 April 2010: Oh that's just weird.
Why does he do it? Because he can, tell him to stop exploiting you and he'll stop. If he doesn't, he's a really out of this world type pervert who can't be helped therefore you should leave him.
No seriously, why h... (read in full...)
She came off her pill, but we kept having sex without condoms. I'm starting to panic!
Q. I'm writing this because I'm worried, my girlfriend is on the pill, so we have unprotected sex. The thing is she came off the pill a week ago due to a course of medication she was taking, we had sex and stupidly we didnt use protection and i came ...
A. 16 April 2010: You're very considerate, I like the fact that you don't want to worry her, but yeah you should be worried man.
Sex with no contraception, it kind of speaks for itself.
Hey don't be depressed though, when life gives you lemons and you don't wa... (read in full...)
Isaac and Me
Q. hi guys i had just turned 13 when i found out i was 6 weeks pregnant i didnt know what to do i didnt tell my mum i went straigt to my boyfriend and told him we were going to have a baby he sayed thats great but i didnt hear from him again so i ...
A. 16 April 2010: Wait, you're telling me we weren't friends this whole time!!!
Lol,
I'm all for the internet based group hug!... (read in full...)
Age difference poll.
Q. im starting a poll to see the age gaps in relationships from ages 14 - 16 e.g. im 14 i went out with a girl tht was 13......
A. 15 April 2010: I'm 15, 2 months younger than my chick...barely a gap, lol.... (read in full...)
Is he too good to be true?
Q. i have been dating a guy for six months. he seems amazing. he doesn't want to have sex yet and accepts im not ready. he never pushes me into anything. he also says he wants to marry me. is he too good to be true?...
A. 15 April 2010: He might be a spy like in that movie with that guy Ethan Hunt. Just be careful if men in black suits follow you asking for the rabbit's foot.
On a serious note, he sounds like a decent guy.Enjoy him.... (read in full...)
Isaac and Me
Q. hi guys i had just turned 13 when i found out i was 6 weeks pregnant i didnt know what to do i didnt tell my mum i went straigt to my boyfriend and told him we were going to have a baby he sayed thats great but i didnt hear from him again so i ...
A. 15 April 2010: Celtic Tiger...ahh let me get my mega-clarification cap on:
When seeing things from a teenage mom's perspective, I described the opposition negatively and labeled the young mom as innocent. Afterwards, I looked at it from the tax payer's point of... (read in full...)
Isaac and Me
Q. hi guys i had just turned 13 when i found out i was 6 weeks pregnant i didnt know what to do i didnt tell my mum i went straigt to my boyfriend and told him we were going to have a baby he sayed thats great but i didnt hear from him again so i ...
A. 15 April 2010: That's a pretty positive attitude you possess. That 888 in my name, everyone always misses it out...maybe it's because Starmonster888 is too long, you can all 888 for short :)... (read in full...)
Isaac and Me
Q. hi guys i had just turned 13 when i found out i was 6 weeks pregnant i didnt know what to do i didnt tell my mum i went straigt to my boyfriend and told him we were going to have a baby he sayed thats great but i didnt hear from him again so i ...
A. 15 April 2010: Wait, don't take the cold happy hating thing seriously, it was just supposed to symbolise how one side of the argument might view the other, I didn't men to offend...I should have used the flawless "no offense" technique...sorry. I should watch my ... (read in full...)
What's your definition of cheating?
Q. I just have a general question here - wanted to hear what everyone's feed back is. My whole dating life, I have assumed and felt that flirtations with other people while in a relationship is wrong. And by flirtations - I don't mean talking to ...
A. 15 April 2010: If sexting is'nt cheating the I don't know what is.... (read in full...)
What is normal...how much is too much
Q. Quick question, is it normal for a guy to call his girlfriend of 3 weeks, 10 times in 23 hours for a chat, lasting between 4 mins to 1 hour at a time? ...
A. 15 April 2010: You know what they say about guys who call a lot? They say "damn, that guy sure calls a lot!"...bad joke. It's really only a problem if the conversation isn't great and you find it too much, in which case all you have to do is politely tell to... (read in full...)
I was thinking about showing up at his place with my raincoat on and nothing underneath for the one hour drive to my mom's cabin. Do guys like things like this? Or, is it too forward?
Q. I am a 24 year old woman and single (I hope not for much longer). To make a long story short, when I met my boyfriend, I took a deep breath and went after. The problem was that he was rebounding. Over a period of time, he got over that and came ...
A. 15 April 2010: A lucky man indeed. Might I suggest you tell him you like being taken advantage of later when you're both more comfortable together sexually. Oh and word it a little better than "taken advantage of"...try telling to take control or makin... (read in full...)
Is the anniversary of your first date important?
Q. So I was talking to my sister earlier and the conversation went pretty much like this... Me: I've been with *girlfriend* for 5 years soon. Sister: When's soon? Me: May... ish. Sister: *rant that can be summed up with 'how can you not know when ...
A. 15 April 2010: I acknowledge it like every few months, but that's probably because I'm a teenager so a year is like a decade. It would probably be yearly if we were a little older. She doesn't really care whether I do mention it but you know, covering my basis ... (read in full...)
Break up or stay together??!
Q. I have a boyfriend of 1 year. It's been fine for a while, but a few days ago he told his friends that he doesn't like me anymore because I had a "huge butt." One of my friends told him I was going to break up with him, even though I was only ...
A. 15 April 2010: I'm sorry, but did you say BECAUSE you have a big butt?! Either the MoDs need to do their job a little better or logic has ceased to exist! He must've been born in 95 or 96 because no sane man born since the 1994 has a problem with a big butt except ... (read in full...)
15, don't like the life I live, and want a baby
Q. I am 15 years old and want a baby. I do not beleive i am completely ready to have a baby, but what parent is? I have recently moved away from all my family and friends due to my parents divorce. Having parents that were together was really diffacult ...
A. 15 April 2010: Does your potential baby-daddy KNOW he's a potential baby-daddy? I ask because you mentioned you that you are aware that a baby would take your childhood, just thinking if he's fine with it because, but that's my curiosity talking, back to the ... (read in full...)
Isaac and Me
Q. hi guys i had just turned 13 when i found out i was 6 weeks pregnant i didnt know what to do i didnt tell my mum i went straigt to my boyfriend and told him we were going to have a baby he sayed thats great but i didnt hear from him again so i ...
A. 15 April 2010: Can I input a little more, question just got awesomer over night!
I thought is was nice to have a teenage mom come here and give us a good story for once, then all of a sudden it was Star Wars: The Taxpayer Strikes Back!
There is more than eno... (read in full...)
Isaac and Me
Q. hi guys i had just turned 13 when i found out i was 6 weeks pregnant i didnt know what to do i didnt tell my mum i went straigt to my boyfriend and told him we were going to have a baby he sayed thats great but i didnt hear from him again so i ...
A. 13 April 2010: Hey, congrats! I mean guys, I co-sign the punctuation thing and the studying thing, but at least comment on the actual article as well. Wait let me say that again with emphasis: ARTICLE first poster, not question, ARTICLE. Jumpoutandshou... (read in full...)
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