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... Send *evMick a private message | | | *evMick's profile:I think most of us have days where we feel a little down, but that doesn't mean there is necessarily anything wrong with you.
I try to speak from the heart and give advice that makes sense, comes from personal experience and that you can hopefully relate to your situation.
I'm not perfect, I don't think anyone but Jesus was or is. If I make a mistake in my comment to you, let me know through feedback or a message and I can learn from it.
I counsel a few clients and friends with life issues, faith based issues and anything they need just a welcome shoulder to cry on or talk to.
If I could give one piece of advice to anyone who comes here it would be:
*Be yourself
*Don't let anyone else put you down
*No one can live your life for you
*Make mistakes, but learn from them |
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Should I have sex now or later?
Q. I love this guy so much and I know he loves me.......we've been dating since November last year(2013), seriously, i can't wait 2 have sex with him ( we're still virgins)... My question is, should i have sex now or later(but I'm afraid, he might ...
A. 13 June 2014: Hi Marvy,
Never loose your virginity to keep someone happy or to keep them around. You will regret giving it away so cheaply and it can give you a reputation in the short term of being easy.... (read in full...)
Why are men put off by women who lack confidence?
Q. Why are men put off by women who lack confidence? Why is it so unattractive to them? I ask this because i believe that's why my crush isn't showing interest. He's 40 odd and I'm 27. I am almost certain I saw him looking at my body and the very ...
A. 13 June 2014: Hi,
I think sometimes people are put off because they assume lack of confidence means a lack of something else too.
Men and women like the forward and go getter types, the hunter gatherer who will take what they want by force if necessary.
... (read in full...)
My gay friend is cheating on his boyfriend. How can I deal with this situation?
Q. Around four years ago me and 3 friends from school created a gmail account dedicated exclusively to school things. Presentations, home works, things like that, we all had the password to that account and whenever we wanted to store important ...
A. 13 June 2014: Hi,
You didn't do anything wrong, he is using a joint account for sexual purposes.
I would say don't go through peoples sen't folder, just because you never know what you may come across.... (read in full...)
How soon after you begin dating someone do you begin introducing friends and family to him?
Q. Hello and Happy Friday to all ^_^ I was wondering how soon after you begin dating someone, do you begin introducing friends and family to him? I'm in a LDR. I met my boyfriend in a common interest chat group (not a dating site). We chatted ...
A. 13 June 2014: Hi MSA,
I would keep family away for a good few months if not longer, but friends can be introduced within the first 4-5 weeks.... (read in full...)
I need ideas on how to make Father's Day truly special for my amazing boyfriend!
Q. My bf of three years has been amazing ! He accepted my son into his life with ease and has taken on the roll of "daddy". The road to where we are today wasnt easy, he had to fight to prove to my family that he was worth my time and attention, stood ...
A. 13 June 2014: Hi KG,
Does he like anything like paint-balling or go cart racing? Those are really fun and can be enjoyed by all the family.
Or something as simple as an honest home cooked meal, if you put the time and effort in, even just adding candles o... (read in full...)
I'm worried my girlfriend fancies her personal trainer!
Q. I need your help My girlfriend gos to the gym everyday except weekend and once a week she does a personal trainer session with a lad at first I thought nothing of this now I think she fancy s him she baths every night before seeing him and i...
A. 13 June 2014: Hi ificanhelpifnothelpme, There are many times when one friend will say something to a friends partner. If she fancies the boyfriend (to try and break them up). If she fancies the girlfriend's affection. If she wants to stir things ... (read in full...)
Trying to spice things up -- how about my cheerleader uniform?
Q. my boyfriend and i have been looking for ways to spice things up in the bedroom. i recently found one of my old cheerleading uniforms from high school and discovered that i can still fit into it...and i'm thinking that it might be fun to try a ...
A. 13 June 2014: Hi,
Don't know about cheerleader outfit, unless he has a fetish for teenage girls?
I find it best to go for the Dita Von Teese look. A black bra, black thong or panties and fishnet stockings. If you don't have fishnets a simple pair of black sh... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is on exchange and has become close to a male friend. Am I being oversensitive?
Q. Hi guys, just a question about a girlfriend on exchange. My girlfriend and I have been in a relationship for 3 years, and while we've had rocky moments, we've been fairly stable all along. Recently though, she went on exchange for 6 months wi...
A. 13 June 2014: Hi,
It's not a good situation to be in, basically reading between the lines she has told you all you needed to know.
She has moved on from your relationship, and is secretly the girlfriend of this other person. It's time to move past this r... (read in full...)
My vagina doesn't look so nice
Q. Hey guys I don't want him to see my vagina when i was younger i shaved it and i got shaving pimples and i got dark pimple spot and it doesn't look so nice ... what can i do ????...
A. 13 June 2014: Hi,
I agree that guy's don't care. He will be nervous that you won't like his penis.
What matters is how you both feel when both your bits are together, everything else goes out the window.
If you don't fancy waxing or plucking, when you sh... (read in full...)
It's getting harder and harder to pretend I don't have feelings for her
Q. I have feelings for my best friend and I'm really scared that I'll lose her if she finds out. She's bi, but I'm almost completely sure she doesn't think about me that way, and it's ripping me up inside. It's getting harder and harder to pretend that ...
A. 11 June 2014: Hi,
I think at your age everything seems so huge and you are worried that you'll loose her as a friend. If she really is any type of friend at all I think she will think it's a compliment.
It can be hard going from friend to anything more, e... (read in full...)
My ex is mentally ill, how do I talk about changing our relationship status on facebook?
Q. Hi everyone! A while back I wrote to you asking if I should break up with my depressed boyfriend. I did it, we broke up. He was since sent to hospital again, where he is currently staying against his will because they believe him to be a danger to ...
A. 11 June 2014: Hi,
I think worrying about a facebook status or being in a relationship status is a silly thing to to worried about.
Take it down if it means that much to you, I don't think it will drive him back into the hospital. But in the grand scheme of ... (read in full...)
My wife is worried I'm going to act like our vacation is spring break
Q. Me, my wife and step-daughter have a trip planned to Cancun next month. I am 61, very young at heart, and my wife is 51, much more reserved than I. I am extremely concerned about this vacation due to the fact my wife seems to think that I want to ...
A. 11 June 2014: Hi surferboy,
I'm sorry that you are so worried about the trip. I know when I go to places I am very adventurous and would try things like bungy jumping and other things, where my partner is like your wife and very reserved.
It's a really... (read in full...)
How to make things work with him?
Q. My boyfriend and i met at school. We started dating when we were both 16. We go to universities at opposite ends of the country and have struggled massively with this. constant arguing, barely seeing one another and its reached the point where he ...
A. 11 June 2014: Hi foxylady, Should you have to make things work, or should being in love make things easier rather than harder? Distance can add arguments to a relationship, especially if there are underlying issues there to start with. The fact sometimes h... (read in full...)
Why don't I feel close to my boyfriend? I feel distant from him even though we do enjoy intimacy together
Q. Hi! So I've been with my boyfriend for about 4 months now, and I really like him and he really likes me. Now the problem is, as much as I like him, I really can't feel close to him. Like, it barely feels like we're in a relationship! It...
A. 11 June 2014: Hi,
I think 4 months is too soon to be jumping to the boyfriend/girlfriend issue and you need to start with being friends and I mean really friends, not just hanging out whenever you feel like it.
4 months and being 16/17 and having sex alrea... (read in full...)
I went into my boyfriend's mail and closed down all of his online dating accounts!
Q. So my boyfriend of one year has always had dating profiles since he was 13. (He is 21 now). He likes to talk to people though he's never met up with anyone from online since he just simply doesn't believe that something like love could come from ...
A. 11 June 2014: Hi,
Before invading his emails and pulling his profiles, I would have simply asked him about them. You admit that most of them are unanswered or unopened, so why take so drastic a measure.
I often get emails, mostly spam from dating sites I h... (read in full...)
Is a tumor an STD?
Q. Hi, my girlfriend of four years found out from a doctor over three weeks ago that she has a tumor in her ear. We were devastated by the news but we're doing the best we can to cope with it. She's already scheduled for a surgery. While sitting ...
A. 2 June 2014: Hi,
Unless you often have sex with your girlfriends ear then no it isn't sexually transmitted.
A recent study showed everyone has the cancer gene, all it takes is a knock or something to trigger the cells and voila they multiply and you... (read in full...)
I'm happy to be a girl, I just don't want breasts
Q. I have always hated my breasts and I wish I didn't have them. My mom says I will change but I don't think I will because I just look in the mirror and cry and just hate everything I see I want a flat chest so badly and I just don't know what to do ...
A. 2 June 2014: Hi Sslol, Thanks for the question. I know when I was younger I hated my penis. I thought it was ugly and didn't want it. Like you, I knew I wasn't transgender, a friend of mine went down that route and I couldn't understand it. http... (read in full...)
How / Where do I begin asking questions about his past?
Q. I am a school teacher that recently moved to China for employment, and have a boyfriend living in the USA that is ten years older than I am. We have been dating for one year, and he has a lot of baggage. He has two children from his marriage and ...
A. 2 June 2014: Hi Jessie Star,
If you have always been apart, I would say please don't call it a relationship. Have you ever met this man in person?
Questions about his past, should be able to be mentioned any time after you start dating.
Your post, is f... (read in full...)
Surely he will feel disappointed that my nipples are not the way he prefers?
Q. I have a question that may seem so trivial but it's worrying me . The man I am involved with has a thing for and a preference for large nipples. He really prefers them and they turn him on a lot but the problem is I have reasonably sized breasts but ...
A. 2 June 2014: Hi,
If this man loves you he will not see a small minor thing like that and be completely put off or be disappointed. If he does he is shallow and not good to be around.
I think you are worrying over nothing, everyone is different and th... (read in full...)
I miss my girlfriend so much, its making me a miserable mess :(
Q. hi dear aunts, im so sad, i miss my girlfriend too much, I love her to bits and i can not be happy anymore if im not around her. we are long distance, continents apart. we have been that way for two years now and we will finally close the distance ...
A. 2 June 2014: Hi,
Letting yourself go, because the woman you like isn't with you is silly. You can't fall apart at the first bit of distance.
I would urge against rushing into marrying someone, just because you think you're in this mad wonderful love. ... (read in full...)
He is my first love!! Please give me some advice
Q. My boyfriend and I have been close friends and we started dating recently. He is 8 years older than me but I love his personality. He is my ideal boyfriend. We play sports together every week and text each other everyday. He seems really seriously ...
A. 2 June 2014: Hi,
I thin it honestly sounds like a school girl crush on a much older man. I personally think 8 years is a little too old to be with someone at your age and would be asking, what he hopes to get out of it.
I have also previously said,... (read in full...)
My bf of 3 years is getting annoyed, irritated or angry with me almost all the time!
Q. Dear Cupid My bf of 3 years is getting annoyed or irritated or angry with me almost all the time. I am not even sure what i do that set him off, its like i tip-toe around him all the time, its like i am on probation and he is evaluating me. ...
A. 1 June 2014: Hi,
You need to come out and clearly ask what it is you are doing. I think 100% it's him not you. There are lots of mental health issues or personality traits that come across as this kind of flying off the handle.
If you need to get out, I wo... (read in full...)
A cheater who wants out
Q. i've been trying to leave nothing works what should i do.i have been in a relationship for ten years been married for five.after 2 years in my relationship i told my husband that i would like to leave because i'm not happy;he is a scorpio by the ...
A. 1 June 2014: Hi,
Cheating just to hurt someone enough that they let you leave, is not a nice thing to do. It doesn't make you a bad person, just callous.
I would urge against disappearing, you may need to find a mediator who can come to some arrangement... (read in full...)
My 17 yr old son met an American girl while gaming online and now her parents are offering to pay for his ticket so he can meet her! I'm scared that he'll never come back!
Q. Hi Looking for some advice! My 17 yr old son met an American girl while gaming online 4 yrs ago! They have been chatting on fb and Skype since and now he wants to go to America to meet her! Apparently her parents will pay for his ticket!! I have t...
A. 1 June 2014: Hi,
You are being naturally cautious and rightfully so, it's another continent. However, I traveled when I was younger and loved it.
It is a life experience that doesn't come around all too often, and I say let him go for it. Just have ground... (read in full...)
I'm worried about my erections when I'm with her in person!
Q. I'm in a long distance relationship with an amazing and extremely attractive woman. We have spent a number of weeks together in person now in the real world, and I would definitely say we understand each other very well and are very comfortable with ...
A. 31 May 2014: Hi,
There are always nerves when meeting new people, that's just anxiety about how she will like it, how long you will last etc.
None of that really matters when you are with that person, she will also have anxiety about things in her own head.... (read in full...)
Will I just be another notch on his bedpost?
Q. [Mod note: could you please ask the question you'd like the aunts to answer? Your last comment said you need to be so desperate to be with a man like this so why are you even considering such thing with him? Thanks.] Hi dear agony aunts. Thanks f...
A. 31 May 2014: Hi tibob,
Having sex just because he is your crush is a bad idea. However I can't make you not do it, that is our choice as human beings with thoughts and feelings.
Sex with anyone, just for the sake of it I see as a bad thing. Not because I'm ... (read in full...)
I'm done with dating and want no more to do with women!
Q. I don't even know when to begin...it's like every time I try I somehow get used. My troubles started four girls ago and yet somehow I haven't learned my lesson. Let me tell you about myself; I'm twenty-three, college graduate, and living at home. I ...
A. 31 May 2014: Hi,
I think if you have come to this point, then it is as you describe time to take a break. The length of that break is entirely up to you.
I would just not look for a relationship, but don't be against the idea. I have male friends who have... (read in full...)
My teenage daughter is breaking the family apart!
Q. I've been married for 10 years and when I met my husband he inherited my 3 children too who were very young at the time, we have also had a child together... I had just left a violent marriage 6 months earlier and we were all still recovering (the ...
A. 31 May 2014: Hi, I'm sorry to say that you aren't listening to us. You are still talking about leaving your husband because of your one daughter who is in charge of everything. To answer your statement, your other children will see the same thing we are. ... (read in full...)
My teenage daughter is breaking the family apart!
Q. I've been married for 10 years and when I met my husband he inherited my 3 children too who were very young at the time, we have also had a child together... I had just left a violent marriage 6 months earlier and we were all still recovering (the ...
A. 30 May 2014: Hi,
You have looked at the advice and hand picked the bits you wanted to hear. You are still putting one child above the others in terms of your time and effort.
Why does this one with bad behaviour, deserve more care and attention than t... (read in full...)
My teenage daughter is breaking the family apart!
Q. I've been married for 10 years and when I met my husband he inherited my 3 children too who were very young at the time, we have also had a child together... I had just left a violent marriage 6 months earlier and we were all still recovering (the ...
A. 30 May 2014: Hi, I can't possibly imagine what you are going through and I'm sorry that your family is falling apart. I have counseled several children who have come from an abusive home and have either gotten themselves into an abusive relationship, or... (read in full...)
She said my 'offer' isn't good enough?
Q. My girlfriend and I have been together for 4 years and I recently asked her to move in with me. However she turned me down. I'll admit we've had our arguments over the years, mainly because she kept saying she thought I acted single but I've never ...
A. 30 May 2014: Hi,
I think 26-29 is old enough now to settle down and stop wanting to visit far flung destinations with your mates.
Now, if you wanted to take your girlfriend and have life moments together I don't think she would say no. I agree that you b... (read in full...)
My girlfriend defecates during sex
Q. Dear Cupid, I have been with my current girlfriend for over 2 years and ever since the beginning she has had a problem during sex. It doesn't matter what position we try, each time during intercourse she poos. I've asked her if she is doing i...
A. 30 May 2014: Hi,
Just as a followup she has had children before and I think that may have caused it.
Yes, we tried cleaning her bowels an hour or so beforehand to see if that helped.
We got her checked by a female doctor, and she didn't find anything phy... (read in full...)
I don't trust my boyfriend.
Q. I do not trust my boyfriend. We've been together 4 years, don't live together but have talked about moving in together in the near future. We have problems in our relationship but the biggest one is I just don't trust him. I'm always questioni...
A. 29 May 2014: Hi,
Simple answer, if you can't trust him, he isn't really your boyfriend.
A relationship can't be built with solid foundations, when there is doubt or lies. It will eventually crumble to the ground.
Like the man, who built his house upon... (read in full...)
How can I say I'm sorry?
Q. I had been with a guy for a few months, friends before that for a long time. When we were friends he was seeing someone else and during their break up he came to me to vent and talk over. We became close. We fell out and had not been speakin...
A. 29 May 2014: Hi,
If you are truly sorry just say sorry. It should come over how sorry you are in your tone of voice, words and emotions.
Was it foolish, yes. Did you do it intentionally to hurt him?
I think he got into a relationship too soon af... (read in full...)
His social anxiety keeps him house bound
Q. I like this guy quite a lot and I really want to get to know him more, originally my parents set us up as they know his mum well. The problem is that I can't him to come out of his house, he hardly ever comes off his computer. He lost his dad at a ...
A. 28 May 2014: Hi,
I would be a little careful with this one. I know from experience that sometimes you get set up to be someones carer by their family.
Hang out with him, if you like his company, but only professional help will break his anxiety about so... (read in full...)
What is more important: being comfortable in a relationship or having a similar level of attraction to each other?
Q. I wanted to share my point of view on attraction in relationships. Obviously there has to be attraction for a relationship to work. But in my opinion, go for someone you're moderately attracted to over someone you're insanely attracted to. Me...
A. 28 May 2014: Hi,
Attraction comes in lots of areas, so do interests. You can be attracted but not sexually attracted, also if you don't share the same interests it won't last very long.
You can be attracted to someones intelligence, looks, personality etc.... (read in full...)
My LDR can see prettier women in porn, so why bother taking it to the next level?
Q. I'm in a long distance relationship and we have not yet been sexual in person . Next time we meet we will take it to the next level but in the meantime we enjoy that online but I'm worried about how I can possibly keep my bf interested when he ...
A. 28 May 2014: Hi,
I don't think you should worry about porn at this stage. The long distance will be playing on your mind and even the smallest things become the size of Uluru.
The best thing is sex with someone you really like, you have waited and it wi... (read in full...)
Did I come on too strong and freak him out?
Q. Dear All, It seems I am having a dilemma. I have recently met a guy over a month ago. It started as me trying to be friendly with a guy in our hiking group as no one really talked to him. I didn't start to fall for him until the third meeting ...
A. 28 May 2014: Hi Lady Green,
It's a tough call to make about coming off as too strong. Some men will run at the mere hint of a date, others will run if kids are mentioned etc.
I would tend to think that it was a bit of, sexting texting fun and maybe it's b... (read in full...)
I mentioned my ex and now this man has blocked me
Q. When I was in college a guy lived next door and I lived there until the end of college and moved and he went to michigan we were just friends and neighbors. He came into town not to long ago and low and behold his aunt is next door that he was ...
A. 28 May 2014: Hi,
Some people have really bad penis envy and it could be he is one of them. I knew someone who got so upset with the size of his that he took a knife to it and hacked it off.
It is also a possibility that, he did feel something for yo... (read in full...)
What's wrong? I never get invited back ! I invite them, and they never reciprocate after that.
Q. My question is: Do you expect people to reciprocate your invites to dinner, brunch, lunch or a mere cup of coffee? I don't do it because I expect it, but since I have a particular taste and healthy diet needs, I tend to invite people over if the ...
A. 28 May 2014: Hi Tula,
You shouldn't do it just to expect them to do it back. I tend to think that you are coming across as too forward either that or you aren't a very good dinner guest.
I would drop it for a while and see if the invites flood in.... (read in full...)
Should I introduce this married woman to my wife?
Q. I am married. I met this woman some time back. She seems to be very interested in me. She is married. We used to share lot of sms and our own photos. Recently I told her that she is looking good and if we were not married then I would have asked for ...
A. 28 May 2014: Hi,
I would keep them apart. You don't want to mix these two worlds.
She isn't looking to be friends with your wife, so why do you think it's a good idea to have them meet?
I think it's a train wreck waiting to happen.... (read in full...)
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