Should I accept being the messenger between my divorced parents or should I just put my foot down and refuse to get involved? And how do I deal with my fathers behavior?
Q. I'm going crazy. My parents divorced (not officially yet) a month ago, and they both expect me to be the messenger between them. When they separated, my mom told me some things that I felt were very hurtful, so I didn't feel the need to talk to ...
A. 1 March 2013: No you should not be the messenger. Tell your parents if they can't communicate with each other directly, use a lawyer to do it because this is affecting your mental well-being.
Also, you are living in the house so you should help in the cleaning... (read in full...)
Boyfriend's unwillingness to save money is affecting our future and I don't know what to do about it
Q. Me and my boyfriend are complete opposites when it comes to money. He's all about spend, spend, spend and I'm the save, save, save type which is causing problems between us. Any time he works he wants to spend it all instead of saving. We're trying ...
A. 1 March 2013: I don't understand what "I told him last night that we will begin buying our own stuff instead of having others to do so" means. Are you getting money from someone outside your relationship? Or are you saying you have to buy things for your ... (read in full...)
I'm terrified of telling my parents that I'm gay so I stay away but I miss them and want their understanding!
Q. i'm a 29 year old lesbian. i've been out of the closet since i was 18 and am nowhere remotely ashamed of my sexuality and who i am. i never feel the need to hide who i am and what my sexual orientation is. if people ask, i always tell them the ...
A. 1 March 2013: Oh, that is a difficult thing for you to face :( Are your parents against homosexual relationships? If not, then they'll probably be shocked and a little dismayed, but it shouldn't be enough for them to cut ties with you. Does your brother know you ... (read in full...)
Does this guy in PE like me?
Q. sorry it is long I am a new student at a high school. Their is this guy in PE class I am wondering if he likes me. I did not have a locker the first few weeks so i changed in the ladies bathroom so i came through a different door than all the other ...
A. 28 February 2013: They might mean he's physically attracted to you. As for liking you as a person... Well that remains to be seen. I suggest trying to be friends first and don't put on a personality you think will make him like you more because that sort of thing is ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend gives her phone number out to other guys and texts them!
Q. My Girlfriend and I have been dating for about two months now. I dont talk to any other girls but she talks to other guys. what pissed me off to get mad at her and write this was she said something like "why wont this guy leave me alone, I dont want ...
A. 28 February 2013: Are you assuming she's giving out her number? That she doesn't tell the guys she's already got a boyfriend? If you are only making assumptions, then it is time to stop because it isn't your girlfriend who is poisoning your relationship, it is you. ... (read in full...)
Will my boyfriend no longer want to date me if he finds about my family history?
Q. Hey everyone, I have a boyfriend who knows everything about me apart from certain things about my family I omitted like...my dad's sister ran away against the wishes of her family and got married to a convict whose been involved in a lot of crimes,a...
A. 28 February 2013: The best thing to do would be to tell him immediately! Better you find out now than in a few years time, after you've made too big of an emotional investment in him!
Personally I don't think it's really an issue, particularly if he is the kind of ... (read in full...)
What do I have to do to make my boyfriend realize that what I do for him/his family is out of love?
Q. Is it possible for someone to never be satisfied with you,rather not see how much you care.. My boyfriend of 5 years never really sees the good in me..I'v been taking care of his autistic sister for the past 4 years not because I have to but beca...
A. 28 February 2013: With some people, there's really nothing you can do to make them see that you ARE helping them. If you continue to help them and you keep on increasing the degree by which you help them, they'll eventually think that they're only getting their du... (read in full...)
Relationship Questions. Here are a few to answer or ponder on. What do you think?
Q. Hi folks,could you please answer the following questions? 1. Do you agree with this statement? -- "Men do not want female friends. They have their friends, and aren't on the lookout for new females to add to their circle, unless, of cours...
A. 28 February 2013: 1. Agree and disagree. I think it depends on what kind of person the guy is, whether or not he's making friends because he just wants someone he can talk with comfortably or because he just wants sex. 2. Having a lot of male friends when you ar... (read in full...)
I don't want to cause drama but I have to stand up for myself
Q. I will be getting married next year to my fiancee. His older sister has this very dominant personality and he comes from a conservative family but yet his parents are very open minded. So, the problem is that his sister was telling me that I cannot ...
A. 28 February 2013: We-ell. Maybe tell them that you understand why they would prefer more conservative dresses but that you would be much happier giving every style of dress a shot until you find the right one that makes you feel good on the day. That you'll love ... (read in full...)
Is he inerested? Does he like me? Should I ask him out for our second date?
Q. I went out on a date with a guy, the date went really well. We talked, laughed, he told me I looked nice, and at the end of the date we hugged and he told me we should definitely hangout again. I didn't want him to feel as if he had to be the on...
A. 28 February 2013: If you don't want to text him so much and seem 'clingy', then just send him a simple text message saying "I would love to see you again. Can we set a date?" or something along those lines.
If you didn't make it clear to him on the first date tha... (read in full...)
HELP guy who loves me only for my looks? mixed signals.
Q. Alright so this isn't really a question but more of a combination of a question and a rant. It might be really long but I really need help with this. Its kind of a long story so last year was my first year in highschool. my first semester instead ...
A. 28 February 2013: You want to get all the butt slapping, perverted comments and a constant stream of "NUDE PIC NUDE PIC NUDE PIC"? You know that's just him treating you with disrespect right? You may have some affection for him but it just seems to me like he just ... (read in full...)
Ladies: Why do so many of you criticize other ladies?
Q. I have a few questions for the women. Before I ask them, though, I just wanted to say I know not ALL women are like this. I've noticed quite a lot are, though. First question: Why do you think that if you don't have big boobs, or you have fat in ...
A. 26 February 2013: I would say that women's reactions to each other can be attributed to magazines (among other things like daytime TV or soapies etc). Why? Well men don't usually read magazines and if they do, they don't read the ones which participate in celebrity ... (read in full...)
My g/f broke up with me saying she needs to find herself but wants to be friends
Q. Hi,I'm 20 years old and me and my girlfriend were dating for 3 years. She left me yesterday telling me that she wants to be my friend again and that she needs to find her own identity.Please help.I really want to get her back....
A. 26 February 2013: I don't think there's really anything you can do other than take CMMP's advice and just give her room. If you try to contact her too often she can't figure out her identity. It happens when the people in a relationship spend too much time together ... (read in full...)
Is it cheating? I feel horrible and do not know what to do next!
Q. Dear Cupid, I am 22 and gay from Germany and its pretty late in the evening but my consience does not let me to go to the bed. I have a boyfriend more than a month now and everything was going perfect. I truely love him and he loves me too. He...
A. 26 February 2013: It's cheating. It's not something you would usually do with a friend or a stranger, it's usually only something you do with your partner. If you love and respect your partner you should tell him. If you don't and he eventually finds out, it'll be ... (read in full...)
Is my Bf mean to tell me, "if you wore make up you could look as good as other girls"?
Q. My boyfriend makes me feel insecure then gets mad if I ask questions about him having his exs numbers/if he see's then ect. He confuses me cos he says such sweet things sometimes but then he says things like "if you wore make up you could look as ...
A. 25 February 2013: You are insecure but some of the things he has done seems pretty insensitive. Firstly there's nothing wrong with keeping in contact with an ex if they ended their relationship well. They can still be good friends and you should allow them to remai... (read in full...)
Relationship ending due to cheating but stuck in an apartment together
Q. hi Im really hard a time thinking about this me and my ex gf of almost 4 years broke up with me she said she couldn't love me anymore because she cheated on me she says she doesnt want me to get hurt anymore, i did forgive her for the cheating, i ...
A. 25 February 2013: If she really wanted to continue her relationship with you, she'd be begging and crying for you to forgive her. If she doesn't want you to get hurt anymore, then she think she's going to cheat on you again or do something equally painful to you once ... (read in full...)
Getting married in May but fiancee called another girl beautiful on the phone.
Q. Dear cupid friends, help! I have been dating my fiance for 7 years. We are supposed to get married in May. He knows I already have trust issues with him. Well the other morning I looked at his phone and to my shock he had texted some other girl and ...
A. 25 February 2013: I think you should try to resolve these trust issues before you get married to him, otherwise if something does happen after marriage then divorce will be messy :( Decide if you can ever fully trust him again. If not, then you have to leave him. If ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend goes hours without contacting me but has time to play on xbox?
Q. Should I be pissed off that my boyfriend, of 2.5 years, goes hours on end without contacting me - yet within those hours will play on facebook and xbox? Example: he may text me at noon and then I won't hear back from him until like 10pm but he makes ...
A. 20 February 2013: If there's nothing important to say, then I would rather he save his money on texts and calls :P The best form of contact you can get with a partner is personal contact. You can say whatever you want with your partner and actually know that they're ... (read in full...)
I overheard my husband saying he wish I would lose weight. Now I feel sad and like absolute crap!
Q. I don’t know what to do. It all started New Year’s Eve, my husband and I were at his company’s party and I went to grab him another drink. As I was walking back, I saw my husband and one of his employees talking, when I walked up behind my husband ...
A. 20 February 2013: Let me say this. You might not have the ideal body that he wants but that doesn't mean it's impossible for him to be physically attracted to you. He loves your face and he loves aspects of your body and the best thing is, he loves your personality. ... (read in full...)
Husband's phone has a name as "buddy" who turns out is a girl! Should I be worried?
Q. So the other day while my husband was in the shower, he asked me to find a number in his cell phone (a friend of his that we were meeting later) and call him to confirm the time. When I was doing that, his recent call history showed up, and I ...
A. 19 February 2013: Be worried only if he starts behaving out of the ordinary. It could just be that her name really is Buddy :S And he might have needed to call her for something about work or another. Does he call her often?... (read in full...)
We don't seem to agree on how things should occur before he proposes!
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years. We lived together for one and I had to move out because of family issues. He just started a business an hour away and wants me to get a job down where he is so we can be together again... I told him ...
A. 19 February 2013: Um... You've lived with him before without a proposal I don't see why you can't just live with him again. If I've already lived with my partner, I'd want to stay with him just because I'll miss him after all that time together. Also, there ar... (read in full...)
Ex boyfriend has 20,000.00 he borrowed from me. Will I get it back?
Q. Dear Cupid My bf of 2 years broke up with me few days back, he was very abusive during the last 1 yr. Im still under depression and i did all things like begging, sending him mails, calling him to take me back. He didnt repond to anything, i gues...
A. 19 February 2013: Did you give him the money or did you loan it to him? I think you definitely need to see a lawyer to sort this out because unfortunately, if there's no written or verbal (bit shady, this one...) agreement that the money was for LOAN only, then he ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend says the past is the past but I have trust issues!
Q. I have been with my fiance for seven years. We broke up for five monthe in 2011. When we were broken up he was awful. He lied to me so many times. He started seeing a much younger girl. We are back together now. And we are planning our wedding in ...
A. 19 February 2013: Did he say awful things to you and see the younger girl after you guys had broken up? Or were these things that caused you two to break up?... (read in full...)
Isn't there supposed to be a hymen?
Q. Hi i'm a virgin and i try to finger my self but there was nothing that stops me i even use marker(coz my fingers are little) and it doesn't even hurt.wasn't there suppose to be my hymen?...
A. 19 February 2013: It's quite common not to have a hymen. It can break as a result of a lot of things e.g. bike riding, running, jumping, inserting rigid objects or fingers in there. No need to worry ;)... (read in full...)
There's a thief in my house and my parents won't help me pin them down
Q. Okay, so i have a paper round every weekend i get paid £18, and i have been saving my money for ages, basically on Friday i had 5 £20 notes for sure positive certain and a £5 note i counted it all and i definitely did not spend it. So i had £100 ...
A. 18 February 2013: Your parents really should have discipline their kids better. It's not right for siblings to steal from each other. As CindyCares suggested, put your cash in a bank account; at least you'll earn interest that way. Or you can install a lock on your ... (read in full...)
Have I spoiled my last child to the point where he doesn't want to grow up?
Q. Dear Cupid ,I have raised my children from babies to adults my daughter has graduated and has a job and moved on with her life. Now my son is the last one with me at home he will be 18 in nine months I told him his gravy train will end on his eigh...
A. 18 February 2013: If your daughter grew up with the same rules as your son and she has made the transition from kid to adult well (it appears she has) then I'm sure you're doing something right.
You can't support him for the rest of his life and if you do, any self... (read in full...)
He said we were more like friends and we haven't spoken in 3 days. Is it over?
Q. We've only been together for 2 months, I know it's really short but we like each other so much. Me and my boyfriend were completely fine, then all of a sudden our conversations have gotten shorter and shorter, then finally I asked him whats going ...
A. 18 February 2013: You know, he was probably trying to get out of this relationship but wanted to make it seem like it was solely your fault. So you may have been spending more time with your friends than with him (honestly, I think that is OK when you're just two... (read in full...)
I don't want my ex to call me but can't change my number right now. What can I do?
Q. Dear Cupid My bf who broke up with me few days called me yesterday. He was abusive towards me for the past 6 months. I wanted to attend his call but got scared that if i hear his voice i might crawl back again. Also scared that if i didnt attend h...
A. 18 February 2013: Look up your phone model and how to block a number on google. Usually you can block a particular person by just looking up their contact details on your phone and pressing a button which may say something like "block caller".
Persevere! You are ... (read in full...)
Will I ever have a chance with this guy or am I always destined to be in the friend zone?
Q. I'm a 17 year-old girl and I've had a crush on a guy for almost three years. We met at a summer camp in 2010, on the way there in the bus. We talked a lot, joked and he seemed really sweet. I was instantly attracted to him. Although he ha...
A. 18 February 2013: Do you really want to have a chance with a boy who can't seem to sit still? Cause that's what he is. A kid with a short attention span, always needing new toys to entertain him. The thing is, even if you do get a chance with him, what's to say you'... (read in full...)
My online guy has a girlfriend, why is he on a site for meeting people then? Where should I go from here with this?
Q. I've been chatting to a guy for aaaaages online. He's 27, I'm 19 but we really get on... like his sense of humour is completely on track with mine and we chat pretty much everyday. He lives about 3 hours away currently but knows I'm moving up there ...
A. 18 February 2013: He may not be chatting up loads of women but is definitely chatting up you. I read an article not long ago telling people to be careful when meeting others online. Apparently a lot of men have "married" or "in a relationship" statuses on thei... (read in full...)
I thought we had a good time, he said he'd call but he didn't. Why?
Q. I have been casually dating this guy for a couple of weeks, we met on a dating site so I know he wants a relationship. Our dates have been great (at least I think so) consisting of dinner, drinks, and cuddling or making out while watching movies. I ...
A. 18 February 2013: Hm... I wouldn't say we all advise you not to call him. Two of us say call him and one of us says to wait and see if he calls back. Personally I think you should call because then you can know once and for all if he's interested. If he is, then t... (read in full...)
Do good looking girls get put on a pedastal?
Q. Are men more likely to put you on a pedastal at the beginning of a relationship if they find you very good looking? ...
A. 18 February 2013: As in do the men do everything for a good looking girl? Probably. I remember seeing something on TV where an overweight lady dropped some papers on the floor and not a single man stooped to help her. Then when a thin, model-like lady dropped her ... (read in full...)
I'm 75% happy with my g/f. Should I marry her in 4 weeks?
Q. HI,Im due to get Married in a few months.When im out with my girlfriend it sounds shallow but i feel im supposed to be with a girl that im more attracted too.I have had stronger feelings for girls in the past but i feel i do love my girl as any time ...
A. 18 February 2013: If you have doubts, then you shouldn't get married. It's not fair for either of you.... (read in full...)
I thought we had a good time, he said he'd call but he didn't. Why?
Q. I have been casually dating this guy for a couple of weeks, we met on a dating site so I know he wants a relationship. Our dates have been great (at least I think so) consisting of dinner, drinks, and cuddling or making out while watching movies. I ...
A. 18 February 2013: I think you should call him lest your imagination runs wild. I mean, he seems to like you. He even introduced you to his friends which is excellent! Something could have come up which meant he couldn't call. Maybe he got hurt, or he has a family ... (read in full...)
I haven't given my b/f oral sex. Is that a bad thing?
Q. The guy I am seeing is really great and patient because I have only ever had sex with one other guy so I am still a bit new to all of this. My best friend was so shocked because he has gone down on me and I haven't on him. She made it sound like a ...
A. 18 February 2013: Well he seems like a pretty understanding guy so if you're open to giving him oral, then I'm sure he'd appreciate your efforts no matter what ;) Maybe while you guys are in the frisky mood, you might ask him seductively if you can take a little ... (read in full...)
What is the right age to get engaged?
Q. I know my question seems a little bland and broad, so let me try to rephrase... How old should a couple be when they get engaged for the first time? I am 18, currently and proudly dating a soon-to-be Marine. He hasn't been home for a few months. ...
A. 18 February 2013: Well I think you've got the right idea. As you say, if you know you're happy with each other and you know how to solve problems with your significant other if they arise and you just feel ready and feel like you could stay with your partner through ... (read in full...)
Should a man pay support if the ex wife is working?
Q. Hi everybody.... If Somebody aware of this answer my question. my relative age 30, married to a woman and got divorced with 2 year daughter. child is with her mother. she had put case to provide some amount monthly. but she is working.... no...
A. 17 February 2013: If they didn't have a child then I would say he doesn't need to pay her any money at all regardless of whether or not the ex-wife is working.
As they do have a child, it is definitely his responsibility to give the ex-wife money if she has cust... (read in full...)
He wants to hold my hand and tells me he loves me, but he has a Gf. What should I do about this?
Q. Hello mates,, so i got a problem, This new guy came to our school and he is really cute well... sort of, and in a few weeks we formed a really special bond and everyone would always think i like him or he likes me. I ignored them but then ag...
A. 17 February 2013: Tell him that you feel uncomfortable with the fact that he has a girlfriend but seems to be making moves on you. If he persists, then he doesn't respect you or his girlfriend and you should move on. If he leaves his girlfriend, you should be careful ... (read in full...)
I have body image issues and want to know how to build confidence.
Q. My confidence is really low right now, because of the way I look. I'm pear shaped... which means I have small boobs, and a big lower body, including matronly hips, a big ass and thick thighs. I know some men supposedly don't mind these things ...
A. 17 February 2013: Come now, not all men have the same vision when it comes to what their ideal woman should look like. Browsing the internet, I've come across several opinions about the ideal female body. Some men like their women large everywhere. Others detest l... (read in full...)
Suggestions for activities that cost little to no money?
Q. Any suggestions on fun activities that aren't so costly or cost no money at all? I want to show my boyfriend that we dont have to spend so much or no money at all to have fun. And how can i encourage him to do fun activities?...
A. 17 February 2013: You guys could go to the beach for the day? Or the park. Or take a walk through the bush/forest. Even window shopping is pretty fun :P Or you could try and cook something fun at home like a cake or some awesome dessert. Maybe just take a walk ... (read in full...)
Should I try to initiate a relationship with him even though he isn't a fan of such?
Q. I have always had a thing for my best friend and he recently told me that he likes me. He isn't a player but he doesn't like having a girlfriend because in the past they have always gotten clingy and caused drama. I feel a really connection between ...
A. 17 February 2013: "would it be best to test it out and see if he will change his mind if we start doing things" I think this isn't a good idea. That sounds like a friends with benefits relationship to me, which actually seems like what he wants. Good for him but bad ... (read in full...)
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