We were friends only earlier, as I was in a relationship. How can I now let him know I'm single?
Q. While I was dating my old boyfriend, I became friends with a guy who I later realized was interested in me. I informed him I had a boyfriend, and our relationship remained platonic. I have since broken up with my boyfriend, but don't know how to ...
A. 13 May 2014: So why not be blunt? If you're interested in him and he's still available, there's no shame in being up front. Maybe ask if he wants to go out sometime.
The good thing about dating as an adult compared to dating as a teenager is that people a... (read in full...)
My boyfriend wants a blowjob but I can't do it due to past experiences
Q. My current boyfriend of almost a year really wants me to give him a blowjob. He's asked a number of times and at first I thought nothing of it and said I would at some point, but more recently he's become more naggy on the topic. This has made me ...
A. 12 May 2014: You're in a bad situation and I'm sorry to hear about your past experience.
But he cannot force you to do it, and he can't guilt you into it either. Some girls do it and some don't. He also shouldn't be sharing this with your friend group; w... (read in full...)
How do I comfort my grieving boyfriend?
Q. My boyfriend just lost his father to cancer (with whom he had a strained relationship) and his way of dealing with it is ignoring his feelings and brushing off the topic. I see that he is shutting himself down emotionally - he's short tempered w...
A. 12 May 2014: Speaking as someone who lost his father at a young age, you've done all you can for the time being. Everyone mourns and handles loss in their own way.
Just give him his space when he needs it but be available to him if and when he decides he want... (read in full...)
He threatens to break up because we haven't seen each other for a few days
Q. My boyfriend is mad because we haven't seen each other for a few days, what should I do ?. I last saw him on Wednesday. It was his fault that we didn't see each other on Thursday,and I was busy on Friday and Saturday. He sent me a text today, sa...
A. 12 May 2014: Your boyfriend is clingy and needy. He doesn't sound emotionally mature or ready for a relationship if threatening to leave you is how he deals with a non-issue like this. He said that to get a reaction out of you and to see if you'll come after ... (read in full...)
What next? I don't want her to lose interest!
Q. So I signed up for eHarmony recently. It's been a long time since I've really dated anyone, and I've had absolutely zero luck finding anyone in the real world. Most of my "matches" are either girls way too far away or a bit too old for me (into...
A. 10 May 2014: Just an update, thanks for all the good advice everyone. We ended up switching numbers and just had a first date yesterday which went great, thanks all!... (read in full...)
I haven't been able to move on in 3 years!
Q. I need some help! I'm currently sat here in tears... most of my weekends pass this way. I broke up with a guy about 3 years ago. I loved him deeply but messed everything up and after a lot of trying he gave up on me. I haven't moved on. I miss him ...
A. 21 April 2014: I generally agree with everyone else here.
Unfortunately you can't "just stop" feeling like this. It's going to take time. And it sounds to me like you haven't moved on for a number of reasons.
When you break up and end a relationship tha... (read in full...)
Girlfriend has jealousy/insecurity issues as well as personal issues. I want out but am afraid.
Q. I want to break up with my girlfriend of nearly three years. We live together with her parents, and we are supposed to move into a new place on Thursday. I am not happy in our relationship because she is jealous and spiteful of me. Whenever I ...
A. 24 February 2012: You have to sit her down and talk with her asap. Tell her how you are feeling before you move out together.
I have been in the same situation as you. My ex-girlfriend was jealous, petty, quick-to-anger and constantly suspicious that I was spending... (read in full...)
How can I explain to my parents that I am planning to move interstate with my 26 year old boyfriend?
Q. My boyfriend (26yrs old) and I have been living together for a year and are planning to move interstate within the next couple of months. I have not told my parents yet. The problem is my boyfriend works with my father. I cannot tell my father ...
A. 13 February 2012: I would say get everything set in stone first. There's no use in telling your parents that you're moving interstate when neither of you really have any kind of job to go into over there. Wait until either you or your boyfriend can get a new job ... (read in full...)
Which guy do I choose?
Q. Please help. Which guy do I choose ? Hi long story so I will try to make it short. I have been seeing this guy from another state and he drives up to see me on the weekends . It has only been 3 weeks of seeing each other but we can't keep our hands ...
A. 7 February 2012: Hi,
You don't sound terrible at all. It does sound to me like you've made your choice already though. Both sound like great guys, but the interstate guy sounds like he makes you happier.
If you and the guy you went to school with hang out as... (read in full...)
What to do with a lying spouse?
Q. My wife of 10 years had some problems with stealing and lying in the early years of our marriage. For the past several years there have been times I've suspected the behavior again, but lacked proof to confirm, so I gave her the benefit of the ...
A. 28 December 2011: I agree with anonymous.
It's wrong to lie in marriages, even with the little things, but if you started trouble over a lottery ticket, then it would make you look like you're overreacting and untrusting.
She's your wife, trusting her is ... (read in full...)
I've decided to break up with my Bf. Should I wait until a week or so into the new year and just have a peaceful x-mas?
Q. I have decided to break up with my boyfriend of 2 years because I no longer feel right in the relationship. I made this decision finally yesterday after lots of thought over the past few weeks, so it's not a spur of the moment thing and I am not ...
A. 23 December 2011: Tricky question.
Timing is very important with breakups, you need to do it when it's suitable for you, but also when it's appropriate and sensitive to his feelings.
I would avoid doing it over this next week with Xmas and New Years and whatnot,... (read in full...)
I broke up with her when she demanded I propose, now she's emotionally blackmailing me!
Q. I've had a very turbulent relationship with my girlfriend of the last 2 years. We've been long distance for most of our relationship, and that's made things tougher. At the start, things were fantastic, we got along perfectly and we couldn't wait...
A. 3 November 2011: I suppose you're all right. I know that talking to her again would just re-open the flood gates and she would end up reading into it as me wanting her back or willing to give her another chance.
I'll avoid talking to her, but I may email her dad ... (read in full...)
I can never talk to my LDR boyfriend anymore and I may be pregnant!
Q. My boyfriend and I are in a Long distance relationship only a 2hour drive away. Were almost at a year in January but have been friends for 5 year going on 6. These past three months he's hardly talked to me but he doesn't stop completely. One ...
A. 3 November 2011: Hi,
As someone who has experience in long distance relationships, I can tell you that this isn't the way they should be. This might hurt to think about, but if his heart was still in the relationship then he would make much more of an effort t... (read in full...)
Do you have any advice on how I can lose weight & begin eating healthy?
Q. Do you have any advice on how I can lose weight and begin eating healthy? I would like to get a head start on my New Years Resolution and begin to make changes in my life. My health is one of those changes. Any advice? Thanks. ...
A. 3 November 2011: Hi,
When I was struggling to lose weight, what I did was write up a journal type thing of both meals and exercises. I'd write up a schedule of when I would exercise, so like three days a week I would go for a walk, the other days I would go for a... (read in full...)
I think he likes another girl, what should I do?
Q. Please help ASAP!! I am ina relationship with this boy lets call him "Skylar". I love him a lot and things had been going great until recently. He is kind of a ladies man, girls love him, of course he doesnt return the feelings. Well lately my ...
A. 3 November 2011: Talk to him. You don't know enough facts at the moment to simply break up with him. Tori could simply be a good friend of his, you can't end a relationship based on gossip that your friends have told you.
Get him alone and talk to him calmly o... (read in full...)
My wife made out with another woman when I was not there. Should I be mad? Worried? Turned on?
Q. My wife made out with another woman at a Halloween party. Should I be jealous, mad? We have talked about fantasies involving a 3 some from time to time over the years. A few times, during sex, we have even talked about her doing something with ...
A. 3 November 2011: As tennisstar said, we can't tell you how you should feel.
Personally I'd be upset. If she were to make out with a guy behind your back, you would be mad and upset right? Why should that be any different if it's a chick that she's making out with... (read in full...)
How can I break up with my boyfriend? I'm not in love with him anymore
Q. How can I break up with my boyfriend of 2 years and 4 months? I love him but I'm not in love with him anymore. This year was his 1st year of college but I could feel us drifting sorta. He even told me that for the past 2 weeks he's been wanting to ...
A. 31 October 2011: Exactly what kc100 said. Break up with him. It isn't working out and he is clinging to you the only way he knows how, by playing on your emotions. The easiest way for him to keep you with him is to threaten his own life, and the odds are, he won... (read in full...)
Can I have a good life with my controlling man who also tells me lies?
Q. Hi, The man I'm with is a liar, he lies frequently and sometimes over ridiculous things I never know what's real what's not. He was married and even lied about his exes age to me until divorce papers arrived and I seen her age. He's got a tem...
A. 31 October 2011: He sounds like he has a lot of his own problems. He is very possessive and paranoid over losing you, perhaps because of his last divorce he's scared that it'll happen again? But that doesn't make it right, what he's doing is controlling you and tryi... (read in full...)
Are my concerns about my daughter's mental health valid? How do I suggest she get help? She wants a sex change for vocational reasons
Q. My 16 yr old daughter told us she wants a sex-change. She said it's the solution to all her problems - she wants to work in the motor industry or the logistics industry, and said both those industries aren't really accepting of women working ...
A. 31 October 2011: Is she serious with this or is she perhaps joking around as a way to get under your skin? If she is serious, then this is extremely inpractical. Women can still get jobs in those industries and she should at least try before considering some... (read in full...)
Ex showed up at a party where I was and then ignored me? What gives?
Q. My ex showed up at a club where he had to have known there was a 99-percent chance I'd be there.(It's my friend that was DJ'ing and hosting the party). He was NEVER part of the scene I'm in - in fact, I brought him to the first party when we start...
A. 31 October 2011: There's any number of reasons why he went. Perhaps he knew other people there were there and it didn't click to him that you would be there, or perhaps he did know you were there and wanted to see you. Maybe he wanted to see if you had moved on and ... (read in full...)
Caught in-between my boyfriend and my best male friend
Q. I'm currently in a very messy situation, and I'm not quite sure what to do about it... Lately, it's been really hard to make time to spend time with my boyfriend. When I'm busy he usually has something important to do, and vice versa, so I'm lu...
A. 31 October 2011: Hi, It sounds like you are trying to have your cake and eat it too, but that's also very understandable. It sounds to me like you're in love with your friend. You two have spent a lot of time together and you get along really well, and natural... (read in full...)
I broke up with her when she demanded I propose, now she's emotionally blackmailing me!
Q. I've had a very turbulent relationship with my girlfriend of the last 2 years. We've been long distance for most of our relationship, and that's made things tougher. At the start, things were fantastic, we got along perfectly and we couldn't wait...
A. 31 October 2011: Hi all, I'd just like to say thanks a lot for all the replies and answers, it's very much appreciated Chocoholicfever, thankyou so much for your input, it gave me a lot to think about and some serious studying up to do with co-dependents an... (read in full...)
Have I done the right thing?
Q. Hi. Been in my relationship with bf for 4yrs we have a daughter together thing is since the start of r/ship he has lied about certain things, he has an alcohol problem so he has lied about drinking. For some time I thought he was t-total! I told him ...
A. 31 October 2011: Does he have a drinking problem? As in, is he alcoholic or had a history of alcohol abuse? If he is then it is definitely good to confront him and deal with this issue head on. Otherwise, I don't quite see the big deal in him having a few dri... (read in full...)
Should I tell my B/f about my dream?
Q. Last night, I had a dream about me and my boyfriend making out. It was obvious we were going to do more in my dream, but I woke up before we got intimate. I need my fellow ants and uncles to give me their opinion. Should I tell my boyfriend abou...
A. 27 October 2011: There's nothing too big to worry about in that dream, he'll probably think it's nice that you're dreaming about him, so why not tell him?... (read in full...)
In somewhat of a struggle with my current relationship
Q. Hi there, (warning: this is long) I've been with my girlfriend for 14 months. We've had amazing times and lots of not so good times. Over 14 months she's had issues with a lot of things about me, issues that we've never really resolved that co...
A. 14 October 2011: Hi, Reading this is very familiar to me, I've had much the same experiences as you have. Don't take offence to this, but your girlfriend is needy, immature and possessive. Your sexual experiences before her - those are in the past. ... (read in full...)
Sex has fallen off of the map for way too long. How do we bring it back into our lives?
Q. My wife and I have not made love in quite some time. Between the two kids, job stress, general tiredness, various health issues etc., it has just fallen off of the map for way too long. Now the question of how to bring it back - I think things ...
A. 13 October 2011: You need to get some time with just you and your wife. Take her out to a nice evening out, or surprise her with dinner for two at home, maybe even get her a nice gift.
I would initiate it physically, maybe a massage or something? Simple touching... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is just too emotional and needy and I cant handle it anymore, but I don't want to leave her in ths state either.....
Q. Patience with my girlfriend is wearing thin. All she ever does nowadays is complain about everything, she rarely asks me how I am, and if I have a problem she usually just tells me it's nothing or she just doesn't listen at all as if my issues don...
A. 13 October 2011: Hi all, thanks everyone for your replies
She was really bad lately, had a bad night last night because she had an argument with one of her friends, then she went off on a rant and took it out on me.
So today I sat her down and had a calm and p... (read in full...)
Help me get over these 3 "speed bumps" so I can ask her out!
Q. alright, kind of a long question here. There is this girl in my class at university who is really really cute and i want to get to know her/ask her out, but a few things, first, i am really really shy and usually have problems starting conversations ...
A. 11 October 2011: Confidence is the answer to all of your questions my friend I used to be extremely shy and withdrawn, unable to talk to a strange girl even if my life depended on it, but you just have to become more confident in yourself Find topics of conve... (read in full...)
Problems with penetration.
Q. I'm a virgin as is my boyfriend but only being 18 we haven't been in a rush to have sex, we both wanted me to be on the pill and I only got on that about a month ago, and have always just agreed that it'll happen when it happens. The other night ...
A. 11 October 2011: Sex is generally always painful the first time.
The best thing for you two to do is to use a lot of lube and take it very slowly.
I think you'll find the best position will be with you on top. As the girl, you'll have more control over the... (read in full...)
Will the heartbreak go away?
Q. How do I get over the guy I lost my virginity too? We've been together 7 months and we are about to break up because i am moving 4 hours away next week and it hurts so bad. I dont want another guy, thinking about doing the dating process again just ...
A. 11 October 2011: Have you two considered going long distance? I know it can be a challenge, but 4 hours away is still workable. Perhaps you two can talk about it and give it a shot?
Otherwise, if your minds are already made up, then the best thing for you to do is... (read in full...)
I masturbate a lot and I hate it. How can I stop?
Q. I am a girl and I masturbate. I'm a virgin and want to stay that way till marriage. I masturbate almost every night and anytime I'm alone which is usually a lot because my mom works. I even do it when my sister is in the house but she's never caught ...
A. 11 October 2011: This is perfectly natural. Almost all young people masturbate, especially at your young age when you're new to everything.
It's nothing to be ashamed of or to hate yourself over.
If it really is bothering you, the best thing to do is to find s... (read in full...)
We are in love, but is she back with her boy toy?
Q. I am in a long distance relationship with a woman who is 42. I am 43. We have only seen each other 3times in the last 7 months and had sex on two of those occasions. I love her and she says she loves me completely. However a few weeks ago her ...
A. 11 October 2011: That's the problem with long distance, it's easy to cover up the lies.
The fact that she was honest with you and said that she picked this kid up says to me that she was probably sincerely helping him. However, he must still be on her mind, I'... (read in full...)
Is he lying? Says his kiss meant nothing. But my friends say he talks about me non-stop. Is he smitten?
Q. So this boy kisses me, and then when I try to question him about it, as I like him, he tells me it's nothing and we'd never be anything. Yet every single one of his friends and my friends say he talks about me non-stop, and stares at me, and gets...
A. 11 October 2011: He likes you but he's trying to hide it because he's a silly boy who's embarassed
Get to know him more and perhaps even ask him out, just be direct about it and I'm sure he'll come around, but by the sounds of it he really likes you... (read in full...)
Is it unreasonable that I'd like sex with her every so often? She's stopped all sex now she is a Christian
Q. Dear cupid, I am in a relationship with this amazing girl and have been for over a 18 months, when we first dated we were having sex twice a week. This carried on until about 12 months later when she asked if we can stop having sex as she is a ...
A. 11 October 2011: Hi Jcoin,
This is a really awkward position that you've been put in.
But the way I see it is that it's totally not unreasonable for you to expect sex at least sometimes. Relationships are supposed to have intimacy in them. It would have been di... (read in full...)
A sex question!
Q. I have been dating this girl for quite some time now. I would say about a month. We do a lot of relationship type of things like going out, spending the weekend together, and staying in. We kiss, hug, cuddle... real basic stuff. However, we have not ...
A. 11 October 2011: Every girl is different, has different opinions and feelings about sex. Some girls will do it two or three dates in, others it may take a few months, some girls want to wait until marriage. I've been with two girls, one of them waited about fo... (read in full...)
Married. Almost a father. But I love him! Help!
Q. I have a problem and I can't tell anyone I know. I'm 36, I've been single for most of my life and have always held a torch for a man I met at University. We recently ran into eachother on the work circuit and all these feelings I've had bottle u...
A. 11 October 2011: When you slept with him, was he still with his wife? Or was this back in university? My advice is to move on. I know it's hard to do, especially after so long, but that's what you have to do. He has moved on from you now, he has a wife and he's exp... (read in full...)
Yes, drunk, I kissed a boy. Shall I tell my BF? But worse my BF did the same a year ago with a girl I know. Do I confront him with this new info on him?
Q. This is long. but please bare with me. Here it comes, the age-old question, manifested into one very weird situation: What is worse. emotional betrayal or physical betrayal? Here's the story. I am at university right now, i'v just finished ...
A. 11 October 2011: Hi, This is a really tough situation for you to be in. First of all, about the kiss you had whilst drunk, while the guilt is eating away at you right now, you have to understand that this sort of thing happens all the time. Everyday there are... (read in full...)
My jealousy is getting in the way of the relationship
Q. hey dearcupid.. im a very jealous person , and i see my boyfriend almost everyday. When my boyfriend and i are apart, and hes with his friends , i seem to always get an attitude because of me being jealous , and i try not to show it , but he still...
A. 7 October 2011: Jealousy can be very overwhelming and has destroyed many relationships.
Both of you spending time with your friends isn't at all spiteful, he may have been being overly defensive there. But remember that you're his girlfriend, everyone else is ... (read in full...)
How do I show my boyfriend how much I appreciate his kindness to me?
Q. Today my boyfriend bought a computer for me knowing I desperately needed for my college. I have spent most of my time at the library, I don't have to now, thank-you to him! I said thank-you so many times today, I feel I can't say it enough. I have ...
A. 7 October 2011: Wow that's really generous of him, he sounds like a keeper!
I'm sure he know's how appreciative you are, but just think of something that he likes, maybe he likes a certain TV show or has a hobby or something and get him a gift based on that?... (read in full...)
How should I control my jealously and this shock that my girlfriend defeated me in a game of soccer?
Q. Six months back, I started teaching Soccer to my girlfriend. We have been together two years. Two days ago, we had one-to-one match and I got shocked to death that she beat me by 6 goals to 3, out smarting me in every aspect of the game. It got ...
A. 7 October 2011: Get over it dude, so a girl beat you, what's the big deal?
It just means that you're a good teacher and hey, you have a girlfriend that's good at soccer!
Don't let this eat you up, jealousy can consume you and kill a relationship. Ju... (read in full...)
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