Sex! Why, so far, has it all been so unsatisfying?
Q. hey ive been sexually active for about a year.. ive just been wondering.. I don't know if im sexually frustrated or not but i think i am. I've had sex about a good fifteen times in the year or so since i lost my virginity and it just doesnt f...
A. 21 February 2012: Casual sex isn't for everyone, and there are those who get much satisfaction from it, and those who don't, like yourself. If you don't want a relationship, I would consider maybe finding a friend with benefits if you just want the sex. It's a little ... (read in full...)
I'm feeling really pressured to lose my virginity!
Q. so here's the deal.. literally everyone my age is having sex but me.. (I'am 16) I haven't done anything with a guy, all I've done is kiss, all the guys I've went out with, all want one thing! and when I don't give it to them they break it off. I ...
A. 17 February 2012: oh and P.S - having sex is NOT the only way to get a boyfriend. Most decent men will respect a woman who does not sleep with them so quickly. They want the chase, they want the pursuit. There's no fun in it for them if she puts out on the first ... (read in full...)
I'm feeling really pressured to lose my virginity!
Q. so here's the deal.. literally everyone my age is having sex but me.. (I'am 16) I haven't done anything with a guy, all I've done is kiss, all the guys I've went out with, all want one thing! and when I don't give it to them they break it off. I ...
A. 17 February 2012: Please, WAIT! Who care if everyone else says they're having sex? If some guy breaks up with you because you won't have sex with him, you shouldn't want him as a boyfriend anyway!!
I waited until I was 20. I lost my virginity to my current boyfrien... (read in full...)
My boyfriend doesn't seem to like foreplay
Q. How can I get my bf to have more foreplay with me before sex? The way he normally has sex and even goes down on me is kind of "straight to the point" with very little kissing or teasing. Its very hard for me to actually climax during oral because ...
A. 7 February 2012: Tell him that what he's doing now just isn't working. Doesn't he know that women are not all the same?... (read in full...)
Does withholding sex mean one is playing games?
Q. This is sequel to a previous post. How is holding out on sex with your partner playing games? How is games if your intention is not to be manipulative? Must sex be everything in a relationship? I am in a LDR which picked up very fast in the begi...
A. 6 February 2012: I am in an LDR, too. But our distance is such that we cannot manage frequent visits. On his only visit here (which was for 3 months), we pretty much went at it like rabbits. It was great :P
The difference is though, that after he left and flew bac... (read in full...)
My wife wants me to be more of an alpha!
Q. I'm not a tough guy type. I always tried to be nice and gentle. When we have sex, I always ask my wife if she is comfortable, or if there is anything she wants, during sex. She used to love me like this, but not anymore! She says I care too ...
A. 1 February 2012: I wouldn't try and be a jerk to her like one of the other aunts said. For me, I wouldn't like it if my boyfriend did that.
What I would do though, is talk about what she wants from your sex life, but don't talk about it right before sex. It needs... (read in full...)
Great love life but sneaky boyfriend. What do you think?
Q. My bf and I have been together for 9 yrs. We are both late 20's and he is good to me and loves me. However I say he is "sneaky" because pretty much every 3-4 months like clockwork I will discover something that makes me really question my ...
A. 1 February 2012: to add on to my last post, I don't mean that this is your fault. His behaviour does not reflect on you as a person.
I mean to say that he is acting like a naughty child who doesn't get disciplined, so he gets away with it each time and he knows... (read in full...)
Great love life but sneaky boyfriend. What do you think?
Q. My bf and I have been together for 9 yrs. We are both late 20's and he is good to me and loves me. However I say he is "sneaky" because pretty much every 3-4 months like clockwork I will discover something that makes me really question my ...
A. 1 February 2012: I would not tolerate that kind of behaviour. He clearly has no respect for women.
The only reason he hasn't stopped is because you haven't done anything about it.
Threatening to break up with him if he does it again, and then not breaking up ... (read in full...)
It seems like sex is a chore for her, how can we improve things?
Q. I've been in a relationship with my gf for 10 months now. We've lived with each other for 6. The problem for me is the almost non existent passion/sex intimacy.now the problem isn't so much the lack of regular sex as that doesnt worry me so much, ...
A. 1 February 2012: Does she ever orgasm when you have sex? Do you ever pleasure her in other ways? It sounds like she doesn't want sex simply because she's not enjoying.
For a woman who doesn't ever get any pleasure out of sex, I can see why she would try to avoid... (read in full...)
Circumcized or uncircumsized? Which do females prefer?
Q. Hi, I want to know if girls like penis uncircumcised or cirmcumcised? I'm french and in my country we are all uncut. It's about religion and culture, what is it in your country (well about muslim and jew I know) but for others country pls let ...
A. 31 January 2012: I've only ever been with one man, my boyfriend, and he is circumscised. He is American. I live in Australia though, and the majority of babies here from what I have heard, are not circumscised and it's not a very common thing. It really only exists ... (read in full...)
Discharge days after sex
Q. Since I've started having sex a few months ago I occasionally get a thin cloudy discharge. To describe it as discharge would be misleading as I can feel it come out and a lot comes out, like I have to run to the bathroom immediately to ensure it ...
A. 29 January 2012: If its right after sex, it sounds like it could be semen. I'm not sure about the other times when you say it takes a few days. You might want to see your doctor.... (read in full...)
How do I keep this LDR relationship going?
Q. Hi, I'm a normal guy living the usual life. I'm 15 and I've got a pretty cool story that I can really use some help with. So I have a youtube account and about an year ago I randomly came across another youtube user and her channel. We actually just ...
A. 27 January 2012: Do you talk to her on skype? I'd say skype is the best thing for long distance relationships. It helps me a lot to see my boyfriends face when he is away.
You two can also play games together online.
As for meeting each other, you'd probably h... (read in full...)
Boyfriend has become verbally abusive after finding out I had sex before I met him
Q. I met my bf 2 yrs ago. I am 24 and he is 28. We love each other so much but the problem is my past. I had another bf in my past before I met him. I loved that guy too(but not as much as this one) but he just cheated me. I didn't want to have sex ...
A. 25 January 2012: Leave him. As much as you love him, this is only going to get worse over time. He will always be kicking himself for why he couldn't have met you sooner (or something along those lines), and then he's going to always take that anger out on you.
... (read in full...)
How do I handle this relationship? He's 22 and I'm 15. My parents do not know about him yet
Q. I've got a situation.. I'm a 15 year old girl that's in love with a 22 year old man. I met him when I had just turned 15 one month before and he had been 21 for about 7 months. We started talking and when we hung out for the first time it was like...
A. 24 January 2012: There is no relationship.
Ugh, the thought of that makes me shudder. My boyfriend just turned 22 and to imagine him hanging out with 15 year olds? Ew. That makes me sick.
I'd want to ask why can't a 22 year old man find a woman within his... (read in full...)
Have we lost our spark in the bedroom?
Q. I've been with my current boyfriend for almost two years. He's really great to me, very kind and caring. In the beginning we had a little issue with his ex because we moved kind of fast into our relationship without recovering from the previous ...
A. 24 January 2012: Why don't you talk to him and ASK HIM what it is that he likes? You can't just assume that every man is going to like the same things as the last.
Have you ever discussed this with him?
Sit down and talk to each other about what it is both ... (read in full...)
LDR advice please?. Because I need it. He's stressed out over his exams. He's not giving me the attention I need. He thinks it's not big deal..
Q. So my boyfriend and I have been together going on two years, we're pretty serious about each other and are planning on moving in together after I finish my Foundation degree next year. We're both 18 and we've been in a long distance relationship for ...
A. 23 January 2012: I would just wait until both of you are through the exam period. Don't try and fight with him, because you both don't need any added stress. If you know he has a test the next few days, leave him be and let him study, and go do your own thing. Trust ... (read in full...)
Matters down under!
Q. I was wondering how most women have their pubic hair, i guess? Just because idk if a guy will be freaked out if I have hair down there, or if it's normal too. If you don't have hair down there, how do you remove it? What do guys prefer? Is having ...
A. 23 January 2012: I have a landing strip.
My boyfriend could care less about what I do with my pubic hair, just as long as its not a forest. I also don't like having a forest. I sweat quite a bit and I like to feel clean, so shaved or neatly trimmed is the way ... (read in full...)
Should I be upset and jealous over his remarks??
Q. I was watching TV with my boyfriend and Faith Hill came on for a moment. This is what he said.... "Mmmm Faith Hill is a scrumptious treat. I want to eat her up. She is sooooooo fucking hot!!!" I got upset and we had a huge argument about it...
A. 23 January 2012: Why are you even still with this guy?
My boyfriend and I only have eyes for each other. He never makes me feel like I'm second best. He makes me feel like I'm a queen and treats me with love and respect. I know that he loves me and we both fee... (read in full...)
I don't believe in pre-marital sex and this guy seems to have a problem.
Q. Am 20 and in a relationship with a 29 year old guy that has 80% of the qualities i w ant in a man. We've been together for a year in which he struggled not to have sex with me because am virgin, and a christain with deep knowledge on pre-marital ...
A. 22 January 2012: You need to drop this guy and find someone who either shares the same views on sex as you do, or who will respect you enough not to blackmail/manipulate you into doing stuff in exchange for materialistic things.... (read in full...)
We now only have sex 2-3 times a month but she gets angry if girls flirt with me
Q. I have been with this girl for 2 yrs and when we first started dating we had sex or gave oral sex to each other alll the time. (First 8 months or so) in those 8 months there would be times we had sex 2 times a day. Now deeper into our relationship ...
A. 16 January 2012: Well... Milflover(I wonder if this name has anything to do with the problem), here is my opinion.
Do you ever romance her? Sex starts outside of the bedroom.
Do things for he like writing her little notes and leaving them around the house... (read in full...)
My boyfriend admits that he thinks about sex with other girls, am I not enough for him?
Q. im 19/f and my boyfriend is 20/m We've been together for nearly a year, and we love each other alot. i honestly think hes my soulmate and we can both picture our future together perfectly... except now im not so sure anymore. im a very very in...
A. 15 January 2012: I'm really not sure if there is anything you can do. You can't change a person. So you'll have to ask yourself if you're okay with him thinking these things?
My boyfriend and I have been together for just over a year. I'm 20, and he is 22. He h... (read in full...)
Why does he choke me or restrain me during sex?
Q. The guy im having sex with will start to choke me or pin me down right before im going to orgasim. if i push his hand away from my neck or move away from his hold he will stop and hold back for a bit. then it starts all over again. he wont let me ...
A. 6 January 2012: My boyfriend used to do this when we first became intimate. He likes to dom, I like to sub, but I just can't stand having hands around my throat. I told him to stop because it would make me very anxious and I wouldn't enjoy the sex. Since I told ... (read in full...)
How can I keep my desires down, so to respect my girlfriends no sex before marriage beliefs, but still enjoy the relationship?
Q. Dear Cupid Im in love with my Girlfreind we are have been going out for almost a year. We have a reall connection and are the best of freinds. The biggest arument we have had was when i did not like her baby names. Im finding it really hard...
A. 4 January 2012: Intimacy is not necessarily sex.
You two can spend time watching a movie together and cuddle or hold hands. You can cook food together. You can video games together. You could have a long, deep conversation about your philosphies on life and wher... (read in full...)
Do you please your partner before sex or just expect them to be ready?
Q. Some people say that men are always ready for sex and can be ready seconds if they have someone to sleep with. Now I am not saying people aren't like this but I also have a question about not so giving people when it comes to sex. What I am wand...
A. 4 January 2012: My boyfriend is 22 and doesn't need special attention prior to sex, he's pretty much always ready. But then again, he is my boyfriend and we're both in love and extremely attracted to each other. I try to make him happy, even though sometimes I'm ... (read in full...)
My B/f was chatting with another girl, about cuddling and licking chocolate off her breasts!! How do I confront him?
Q. He left himself logged in and curiosity got the better of me. I recognize the girl he spoke to and i think he's been with her in the past before me. Him: Hey 3 Her: Hey Him: How are you baby? Her: Good thanks, yourself? Him: Goo...
A. 4 January 2012: My boyfriend left his email logged on to my computer one time, and I saw his chats with an ex and with other girls. He was calling them beautiful and gorgeous, and making inappropriate jokes. I told him about what I saw. If he had gone any further ... (read in full...)
Losing my virginity.....what do I need for my first time? How do I make sure I last long enough?
Q. Okay so when I was 16 I promised myself myself if I was 21 and still a virgin that I would lose it to someone of that year. Well here it is 6 years later and its come to the unfortunate time that I was dreading and excited for. This girl who I ...
A. 20 December 2011: You can choose to wait, and hold yourself accountable to the promise you made to yourself before, or you can have sex now and get it over with.
You just have to bear in mind that if you do choose the latter option, you will have to lower your sta... (read in full...)
Losing my virginity.....what do I need for my first time? How do I make sure I last long enough?
Q. Okay so when I was 16 I promised myself myself if I was 21 and still a virgin that I would lose it to someone of that year. Well here it is 6 years later and its come to the unfortunate time that I was dreading and excited for. This girl who I ...
A. 19 December 2011: It's not about being a saint.
There's no wonder you haven't found anyone to connect with. Any girl you come across is probably put off because you're so negative about life and towards women in general. If you automatically count yourself out, wel... (read in full...)
Guys! What are the motivations, excuses, reasons, justification for men who are cheating?
Q. I'm trying to better understand motivations for men cheating. So all the men out there... IF your woman is very attractive, always sexually available and ready for you, gives you massages, regularly cooks meals, works and pays her own sh...
A. 18 December 2011: I don't believe that it's because the person the cheater is with was not enough.
I believe a cheater will cheat no matter how perfect, loving, adoring, all encompassing their partner is.
Cheating is to do with the persons own selfish wants an... (read in full...)
Losing my virginity.....what do I need for my first time? How do I make sure I last long enough?
Q. Okay so when I was 16 I promised myself myself if I was 21 and still a virgin that I would lose it to someone of that year. Well here it is 6 years later and its come to the unfortunate time that I was dreading and excited for. This girl who I ...
A. 18 December 2011: You've held on to your virginity for this long. If you have sex with some girl you "don't really know but is cool", it's probably not going to be very exciting. And then you'll question yourself as to why you even waited in the first place for ... (read in full...)
Vaginal discharge is making me extremely uncomfortable
Q. WOMEN ONLY PLEASE!! I'm 16 and I discharge a lot. I also sweat around that area quite a bit and it's uncomfortable. I hate sitting on the plastic base chairs at college because it often leaves a sweat mark and I get incredibly anxious and ...
A. 15 December 2011: You can always try panty liners? I sweat a lot on the back of my legs and butt area and I only really leave sweat marks if I'm hot or wearing really thin clothing. So I try not to wear thin clothing if I can avoid it :)... (read in full...)
I asked my boyfriend to have a STI test, he was shocked! Was my timing really that bad?
Q. I have been dating this guy for over a month and we get along extremely well. One thing led to another the night before last and we had really great first time protected sex. The next day we were texting about the experience and I mentioned that we ...
A. 14 December 2011: Too direct for something so private/personal? You guys just had sex together. I don't think it really gets more personal than that.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend arrived for a 2 week stay with me without any money! What should I do?
Q. My boyfriend has just arrived for a 2 week stay (we're long distance) without any money! He says he's taking a month long break unpaid and has just enough to meet child maintenance payments during this time so I'm going to have to cover for him. He ...
A. 14 December 2011: Why wasn't this discussed before he came? If it was, and he had lied about having enough money, I would send him back.
I am in an LDR, and we discussed finances. My boyfriends plane ticket was $1100, and we split that. While he was here, he ran o... (read in full...)
I am a virigin with strong sexual feelings for my boyfriend. Is this normal?
Q. Im 19, ive been seeing this guy who's 23. I met him approx a year ago, met him through one of my friends, there was always that attraction there but nothing happened between us until september, when I agreed to meet up with him before i went off...
A. 12 December 2011: Normal, but I would see if he'd be okay with actually becoming exclusive before you do anything sexual with him. He might be seeing a bunch of other women as you two had agreed upon it.... (read in full...)
What do you think the norm is for sexual experiences at age 20?
Q. Is it normal to have less than 2 sexual partners and to settle with one long term boyfriend by the age of 20? I don't mean to generalize, but many people my age treat sex like it's no big deal, having multiple one night stands. I don't like the idea ...
A. 12 December 2011: I lost my virginity to my boyfriend a couple of days after my 20th birthday.
My friend has slept with 4 guys, but only had sex once with each of them. So that's 4 times total.. She doesn't remember their names. But just because she has had sex ... (read in full...)
Raging hormones are making me want to have sex just to relieve the feelings
Q. Hi everyone. Well this is something I dont really have anyone to talk to about, normally id speak to my mum but she isnt very open to sex talks, and makes it very uncomfortable. Well Im almost 21 and Im still a virgin not because Im religious ...
A. 9 December 2011: No, please don't. I waited until I was 20 as well, and lost it to my boyfriend. We're still together going strong.
Don't waste it when you've come so far. Maybe you could try buying a toy? Sex can be all its cracked up to be, but only if it's wit... (read in full...)
Ladies: If your husband doesn't fulfill you sexually will you get tired of it?
Q. I wanted to ask this question mostly to married women and particularly to the ones that may relate to what I'm saying. I'm dating this girl for 3 years and I got the feeling she was ready to settle down. So, a couple of weeks ago I got the courage ...
A. 8 December 2011: I agree with PerhapsNot.
Maybe try masturbating before sex so that you don't come so early?
Also, the next time you have sex, try focusing on her pleasure. Make it a rule that you can't come until she does. Women are capable of having more ... (read in full...)
Ladies: If your husband doesn't fulfill you sexually will you get tired of it?
Q. I wanted to ask this question mostly to married women and particularly to the ones that may relate to what I'm saying. I'm dating this girl for 3 years and I got the feeling she was ready to settle down. So, a couple of weeks ago I got the courage ...
A. 7 December 2011: Yeah you need to talk to her about this. Have you spoken to her about what turns her on, and what she likes and doesn't like? Do you participate in foreplay before the actual sex? Do you ever romance her?... (read in full...)
Should I change myself for him or stay the way I am?
Q. So my man is 9 years older than me, he is stuck in his ways n believes women should act n be a certain way. I'm conflicted because I'm falling in love with him and I am nothing like what he believes in. My question is should I change ways and be ...
A. 3 December 2011: Well tell him to find someone who is "ladylike" and to leave you alone.
The whole thing about being with someone and loving them, is loving them for who they are, and not trying to change them to suit your tastes. That is not love, that is contr... (read in full...)
How long should I give him before I decide its not going to happen?
Q. Dear Cupid, I met this guy online and after two months have passed he asked me if he could contact me on my mobile, so I gave him my number and we chatted a couple of times and texted each other. The thing is he keeps telling me that he want...
A. 1 December 2011: It's really up to you to decide on this one.
I was in the same situation - this guy I had been friends with over the internet for almost two years wanted to come visit me. We had developed feelings for each other.
I had no objections becau... (read in full...)
Were these bad questions to ask?
Q. I started dating this woman. She has asked me these questions many many times. "Why do you love me?", "Why me?" Why do you find me attractive?" I easily answer them. Early in the am, I texted her cell phone with some questions of my own. I ...
A. 29 November 2011: To be honest if my man ever asked me those questions, I would ask him what happened to him. It would be a HUGE turn off. I love a man who is confident in himself and confident that he is capable of being the man I need.... (read in full...)
Does the contraceptive jab protect from STI's, does it hurt and should I tell my mum I'm having sex?
Q. i have asked my mum to book me an appointment and she has...the appointment was for me to get the contraception impact done. I am having in up in my arm on thursday, but my mum asked why i wanted it :\ i said to her that i cant handle having periods ...
A. 23 November 2011: Well this isn't going to protect you from getting an STI, sorry to break it to you. The only way to prevent, like person12345 says, are condoms and abstinence.
Your mom also probably knows you're having sex if you want to go on birth control.... (read in full...)
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