Like what
he writes?
... Add *old4this to your favourite agony aunts
Want to get in touch?
... Send *old4this a private message | | | *old4this's profile:I am a male age 41. I reside in the US. I am married for several years and have experience dealing with young love in a deep emotional manner. I believe that the majority of people under the age of 30 have had the same types of problems in relationships. Experienced advice helps because it helped me. |
|
Twisted relationship with cousin
Q. I have had and am having sexual relations with my cousin. He is my age. We are both 16. I have always kind of liked him but never said anything because he is my cousin obviously. So nobody ever knew. The summer before 8th grade he started feeling ...
A. 22 January 2009: He is is your moms brothers/sisters son or your dads brothers/ sisters son. First cousin, at least that I can tell. Yea, you GOTTA end this. This is an ocean of taboo trouble you dont want. I liked a girl when I was younger who turned out to be a ... (read in full...)
Is he for real or not?
Q. I really like this guy, we both DJ and we're are both Aquarius's. When we lay in bed it feels like were one and the world could end around us but we would never notice. He brings me over to his friends house and when we are together he makes me feel ...
A. 22 January 2009: dont worry about the age thing, thats the same difference as me and mine. Maybe one thing though is that he is probably a little more settled as a guy than you are as a girl at your age, but its minor. Sounds like you guys are fine but if you are ... (read in full...)
I need to walk away but something is holding me back
Q. Here is my issue: I had a boyfriend who I was with for about 3 years. Our relationship went down the drain after fighting constantly, day after day.. about stupid things. So me and my boyfriend went on a break. But even though we were on a break, we ...
A. 22 January 2009: jen is exactly correct. Not much else to say except now it's time for YOU to be happy. Go out with some friends and have a blast. Ciao babe.... (read in full...)
My step-mom's brother likes me but its causing alot of problems
Q. I'm confused and don't know what to do. My step-mom's brother likes me and i like him, but he is clingy My step-mom doesn't get along with her brother, and my dad hates her brother. My step-mom knows were talking to eachother and doesn't like it. ...
A. 22 January 2009: Yea, thats tough. I think I would move on. Maybe later on in the future if things get better with your step mom and her brother you guys can talk again if you wanted to.... (read in full...)
I've been crying myself to sleep at night overthis
Q. Okay, iv been with this guy for WAY over a year, but we arent dating like boyfriend girlfriend thing. He's 17, im 14, and I know how adults think us "kids" are to young to be in love. But truth be told, I defenitly know I am. He's generous, he makes ...
A. 21 January 2009: Are you kidding me, "love is a choice"? You can pick the people you fall for about as easy as you can lick your own elbow. As for you chick, dont sweat it. Yea its gonna hurt but that IS one of the things that is true about love. It will get better. ... (read in full...)
My step-mom's brother likes me but its causing alot of problems
Q. I'm confused and don't know what to do. My step-mom's brother likes me and i like him, but he is clingy My step-mom doesn't get along with her brother, and my dad hates her brother. My step-mom knows were talking to eachother and doesn't like it. ...
A. 21 January 2009: Are you in love with this guy? If you are then maybe you have to consider trying to work something out with him despite your mom in law. But if its just liking him I think the answer is clear. You are better off parting ways, both as lovers and ... (read in full...)
How do I extinguish the flame and still be friends with my ex?
Q. Hello everyone. I was in a long relationship with this woman. 10 years. For a time, we were planning on getting married. It has been 3 years since it ended. We still see, and talk to each other. At times,it feels alright. Other times, it hurts, ...
A. 21 January 2009: And it sounds like you have your answer. Crystal13 is right, it is not impossible to be friends awterword. But from a male perspective I believe it is much more difficult for men then women. Men often need all the questions answered before we move ... (read in full...)
Too old to be living at home and no one will date you?
Q. i am still living at home with my parents,but no one is really at home because my father travels with his job. my mother takes care of her parents at their home. so i have been told you are too old to be living at home and no one will date you if y...
A. 20 January 2009: Yea, sometimes it is. I mean, if you are still in college or something like that, then it's cool. Women just want to know you are independant and if you are a young twenty something year old guy still living at home they sometimes think something is ... (read in full...)
My wife & mother are constantly fighting! What can I do?
Q. my mother and wife keep arguing. my wife and i are 21 and my mom is 47 and i think they are both to old to be fighting the way that they do. they scream and yell at each other all the time. sometimes my mother brings my wife to tears when they ...
A. 20 January 2009: This is actually quite common for wives and mothers to not get along. The mother is threatened that she is taking her son away so she criticizes. The wife is threatened that the mother is taking away her rights as a wife to you and her ability to do ... (read in full...)
We got into a bad fight and he slapped me!
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for 4 1/2 years. Our relantionship has always been up and down. He has cheated on me couple of times and I've forgived him. Just last Sep we broke up and got back together in late Nov. Things were going good trying to ...
A. 20 January 2009: Hon, it sounds like you guys are better off apart. You said or did something that got to him enough to slap you and he knows he shouldnt have done that. I think he realized after that, that this is unacceptible and he doesnt want to be in that kind ... (read in full...)
How do I extinguish the flame and still be friends with my ex?
Q. Hello everyone. I was in a long relationship with this woman. 10 years. For a time, we were planning on getting married. It has been 3 years since it ended. We still see, and talk to each other. At times,it feels alright. Other times, it hurts, ...
A. 20 January 2009: I've always wondered why people want to remain friends after being together in a commited relationship. It makes no sense. Look at it this way. If you were the boss of a company and were demoted to shipping and had no chance of ever getting back to ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend says "if baby isn't mine, get abortion"
Q. i am in the most horrible situation possible, i never thought i would e ever be in a screwed up situation like this. I have been with my boyfriend for four years and love him more than anything in this world. About two months ago I told him that I ...
A. 17 January 2009: OK, im gonna be an a hole guy and look at it from his view. You cheated and got pregnant, if its not his why should he have to raise it if you guys stay together? I dont blame him for feeling that way. But you have to do whats right for you and the ... (read in full...)
How can I show my love without having sex?
Q. i am 20yrs and a virgin, i have a boyfriend of 26yrs also a virgin as he told me and is currently working. i love him soo much as he is my first boyfriend. but the fact that we both have not sexed makes him feel i dont love him. i am scared of ...
A. 17 January 2009: You have to tell him you love him with all your heart but you are not ready, and if he pressures you like he does then he must not love you at all. But if he does really love you he will wait until you are ready. If he asks when that will be, tell ... (read in full...)
We broke up because he's so close to his female friend
Q. My boyfriend, well now ex, and i have been together for about a year and a half. He has always had a female friend who i have always felt quite uncomfortable about as he would always meet up with her without telling me, spend alot of time with her, ...
A. 17 January 2009: I am a guy so believe this. He has strong feelings for this girl he wont deal with. He is one day hoping she and he will be together and until she finally tells him that it will never happen and she just doesnt want him that way, he will always feel ... (read in full...)
How can I get what I want even though I'm clueless and guys don't have the you know what to come and talk to me themselves?
Q. I don't get it. All my friends say that guys are always staring at me and that some say I'm pretty and what not. Yet, I'm single. Not that I'm desperate to have a boyfriend but it comes to the point that you envy those who have the relationship you ...
A. 17 January 2009: Wow, these guys must be stupid or something. I guess the only thing you can do is continue to look good and do your thing. But like I said, be very crowd social and fun and the right guys should start coming up to you. I've been nervous about ... (read in full...)
Am I his girl or what?
Q. I have been seeing a man for the past 4 months... We usually spend time at his place. We eat together, and cook sometimes,watch movies,t.v., talk and spend quiet time. We are intimate, and have amazing sex. We truly enjoy each others company ...
A. 17 January 2009: I think your situation is good. He is the classic uncommitive male as you said. It sounds as if the only thing left for him to do is commit to the relationship. Also keep it in the back of your mind that he is extremely insecure and thats why he is ... (read in full...)
How can I get what I want even though I'm clueless and guys don't have the you know what to come and talk to me themselves?
Q. I don't get it. All my friends say that guys are always staring at me and that some say I'm pretty and what not. Yet, I'm single. Not that I'm desperate to have a boyfriend but it comes to the point that you envy those who have the relationship you ...
A. 17 January 2009: I find that really hard to believe that no guys come up to you. I'm thinking that maybe you get some but not the ones you want. Everybody has standards but are yours too high maybe? I'm just throwing that out there. I dont know if thats true i'm ... (read in full...)
Three years and he still calls me by HER name
Q. HI. I am having a similar problem to one problem that I just read. My Fiance called me by his ex wives name. AGAIN!!! First time we were in bed in the A.M. and he said "H" go make my coffee. Now my name is "P". Those names are nothing alike. Second ...
A. 15 January 2009: He is obviously still dealing with this woman daily because of there child together. Men also get used to a pattern and it's really hard to break, like a bad habit. BUT, he needs to atleast start trying to fix it by now and respect your feelings on ... (read in full...)
Am I robbing the cradle? She's 15, I'm 21
Q. So I'm a 21 year old male in California... recently I've meet a great girl. We can connect on all levels and have a great time talking to each other for hours and hours. The only problem I have is that shes 15... turns 16 in Sept. She may b...
A. 15 January 2009: If the parents know you and like you and you are being respectful like you said, then if you can keep it that way for a year or so then thats cool. You seem to get what the deal is. Just tread lightly and I would basically keep it like it is until ... (read in full...)
Should I go no contact with my ex
Q. Ok, i've been reading alot about no contact and various plans so i was wondering what's best for me. so here's my situation. we were together for 2.5 years. it was a very good relationship with few problems. were both 21. he broke up with me...
A. 15 January 2009: Ok, if you want him back, dont try and contact him. But if he tries to contact you dont ignore it, just make the conversations very short. Also don't always answer for him. You have to not be always available. Even if he stops calling you all ... (read in full...)
I had sex with a male friend..now what?
Q. after a night of intoxication a male friend and i ended up sleeping together. he and i have been good friends for about 6 years, and although i always found him to be a great guy, i never allowed myself to be interested for fear of ruining our ...
A. 15 January 2009: Then thats what you tell him, that you need to know if this is more than just friends having sex. You need to be honest and tell him that you need to know if this is heading somewhere because you are STARTING to have feelings for him and you need to ... (read in full...)
I feel the fool now, how does this happen? A person who said I was the love of his life?
Q. I too am very prplexed and also hurt I have been term relationship of over 7 years he was much younger and persued me. he was innocent a virgin at 26 and i never knew till after. now after 7 years he says he wants to still be with me but needs to be ...
A. 15 January 2009: Hon, he was just too young and immature. You said it yourself that he was a virgin til 26. Which probably means he has no life or love experience enough to tell you that you are the love of his life and really get what that means. I would say that ... (read in full...)
Husband giving 2 year old beer
Q. My husband keeps giving our 2 year old son a sip of beer. I tell him not to because our son keeps vomiting but he wont listen. Now our son keeps asking me or my husband for beer in his milk. If I dont he'll start crying or all angry. What should I ...
A. 15 January 2009: Thats kinda wierd. I wouldnt exactly call it abuse or anything but i'm guessing your husband thinks it's harmless or something. It probably isnt that big a deal yet, but if he's getting angry for not getting it now then he could be developing an ... (read in full...)
Advice on Oral Threesome?
Q. So my boyfriend has a birthday coming up in a month or so, and we've decided for his birthday that we're going to try finding a third (female) to share oral sex with. So, it won't necessarily be a threesome. We're also considering waiting until our ...
A. 15 January 2009: Tread very very lightly on this. First of all if you do this, Definitely the out of town thing is the way to go, and the further the better. Craigs list is a good place to look for people but as far as the safety, its just as much of a judgement ... (read in full...)
I had my period for 18 days!
Q. i had my period for 18 days. on the last day i used douche and it really burned but it went away. now i should have my period now and i dont. i am only 28. i want to know what could have been wrong. i called the doctors and they said to wait until ...
A. 15 January 2009: certain birth controls have been known to really mess with your cycle. Also any medications you take can have an effect as well. I'm not sure of what else, but one of my old girlfriends told me that simple things like stress can screw things up. ... (read in full...)
Newly married husband looking at porn, I'm disgusted
Q. My new husband has been looking at naked women on Craigslist and now I feel disgusted with him. It makes me feel like we are not special. It makes me feel like he thinks of other women when having sex with him and now I don't really want to have ...
A. 15 January 2009: Ok, no offense, but if he only looks at it on his own time when you are not with him, then the only problem is the one in your head. I was very nice before but all these other comments upset me very much. Would you rather have him go out and sleep ... (read in full...)
Why is my boyfriend doing this? Please help me!
Q. Me and my BF got into an argument.. he got really angry and started saying horrible things to me.. he said I am always whining and..(f*king about with other guys).. he said I am not having sex with him so someone else must be getting since he ain't ...
A. 15 January 2009: Yea, I kinda agree with Jmo. Usually when someone gets mad like that and picks an argument that means they are really frustrated and maybe looking for a way out. I would try talking to him honestly. You may end up going your seperate ways, but dont ... (read in full...)
Am I just being too clingy in my head? Is this normal?
Q. I am trying not to be clingy and so far so good. I have been with him for about 9 months. What I don't get are two things. The first thing is we have not had that relationship discussion yet I have heard him call me "my girl" on the phone... What ...
A. 15 January 2009: I agree, much better info. I dont think you have to worry and by what you just said it sounds like you guys are in a good relationship. Just talk with him like i said to make sure you are his one and only girl. As far as more time together just let ... (read in full...)
Parental dilemma!
Q. I have a parental dilemma about, using information, about "bad signs through facebook." I have access to my daughter's account, and I see alarming conversations. About drinking sex, and many very inappropriate behaviour, I don't ever hear from ...
A. 14 January 2009: You are exactly right you cant attack. All you can do is try to have your mother daughter time and keep reasurring her that you love her and that if she has any problems no matter what she can always come to you. And yea you be a little upset with ... (read in full...)
I am a high school student and I watch gay porn.
Q. I am a high school student and I watch gay porn. 85% of my porn watching is of gay porn and the rest is of gay and straight. I have a girlfriend whom I love very much but I am still attracted to men. What's wrong with me???...
A. 14 January 2009: I was listening to a sex talk show when someone asked them a similar question. The guy said he watched alot of tranny and some gay porn but he had a girlfriend that he loved and was attracted very much to. He said that he would never want to be with ... (read in full...)
Poll question: What is the YOUNGEST age you think two people should get engaged?
Q. I have a poll question of sorts... What is the YOUNGEST age you think two people should get engaged? (ie. 19, 20, 25 etc) And how long do you think you should have been with your significant other before you get engaged? (ie. 1 year, 2 years, et...
A. 14 January 2009: Youngest= 24-25 women, 28-30 for men
longest dating before engagement= Again, age is a factor, but I say if you are both over 25 then a minimum of a year
because by then both of you have given up on trying to be mr or mrs perfect and the true you... (read in full...)
How can I get what I want even though I'm clueless and guys don't have the you know what to come and talk to me themselves?
Q. I don't get it. All my friends say that guys are always staring at me and that some say I'm pretty and what not. Yet, I'm single. Not that I'm desperate to have a boyfriend but it comes to the point that you envy those who have the relationship you ...
A. 14 January 2009: This is easy. You are very pretty and thats intimidating to guys. Most of them probably assume you MUST have a boyfriend because you are so pretty how could you not. The only thing to do is flirt with the ones you like. But us guys are pretty slow ... (read in full...)
I want my girlfriend to drop some weight.
Q. I'm 20 my girl is 18. I'm feeling like I'm starting to fall for her but she is starting to get on the overweight side. I still feel attracted to her but I want her to be healthy. I have told her that I love her how she is but the weight is starting ...
A. 14 January 2009: Dude, if you at least want to get the topic of wieght loss rolling with her, just start saying things around her one day about yourself. Like when she's there with you, act like your looking at yourself in the mirror and say things like, "man I need ... (read in full...)
Can someone truly be forgiven?
Q. I had a one night stand while in a relationship. It wasn't planned and in no way could be considered an emotional betrayal. The following morning, having realized what I had done and what I stood to lose, I confessed. Fortunately for me, my ...
A. 14 January 2009: Forgive but not forget. For a while, possibly years, it will be in the back of his mind. Everytime you forget to call or your late or something like that he will think of it. But as long as you are really honest and he really loves you, over time it ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend wants me to see/date/sleep with other girls.
Q. My girlfriend wants me to see/date/sleep with other girls. She says she wants me to be sure that I want to be with her, and that she doesn't want to restrict me or drive me away by being jealous or possessive. I love her and want to be with her ...
A. 14 January 2009: DANGER DANGER DANGER!!! Im gonna be blunt. There are no good intentions in anything she said. She DEFINITLEY is either seeing someone else or has someone else in mind. I guess it is possible she is hoping you find someone else and leave her so she ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend loves me but he still loves his psycho ex!
Q. My boyfriend loves me but he still loves his psycho ex! I don't know how to get rid of her. What should I do? My boyfriend doesn't want to give up one of us, he doesn't even want me to give up on him but how can I get him give up his ex?...
A. 14 January 2009: You cant make him do anything. The only thing for you to do is tell him that you care for him, but until he can get past his ex you are gonna take a break from him. But you are not gonna wait forever. It's either that or keep going like you are and ... (read in full...)
I don't want to hurt one girl and the other not talk to me...
Q. Hey, I recently met these two girls Sam and Sky, when we first met I hit it off with Sam really well but now when the 3 of us are together I get mixed signals. One minute Sam is flirting with me and the next day Sky is, I'm 16 and get really ...
A. 14 January 2009: Well, they both could be just playing with you, so keep that in mind. But you can't date both at the same time so you have to pick. Obviously you like Sam so go for it. You have to do whats best for you. And if Sam doesnt want you then you cant go ... (read in full...)
Am I just being too clingy in my head? Is this normal?
Q. I am trying not to be clingy and so far so good. I have been with him for about 9 months. What I don't get are two things. The first thing is we have not had that relationship discussion yet I have heard him call me "my girl" on the phone... What ...
A. 14 January 2009: From my point of view you may have waited too long to have the relationship talk because it sounds like he pretty much gets all the perks of a relationship without putting in the work for it. 9 months to me is an awful long time to be seeing someone ... (read in full...)
My wife is gorgeous & I hate men looking at her!
Q. Ive been married to my gorgeous wife for 7 years. Im very insecure about other men eyeing her up in public. When we go out she looks amazing, the trouble is this makes me feel very uncomfortable as im constantly being hyper-vigilent to see if any ...
A. 12 January 2009: You are right, you are insecure and that is very unattractive to women. And even though you say she doesnt know, i think she certainly does know. I think she wouldnt make it a point to tell you about these guys ogleing over her if she didn't think ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend not off well financially but its draining me both financially & mentally--I'm tired of it!
Q. I have spent 5 years without a proper job since I graduated from university. Those have been the toughest times of my life. I was trying very hard to get a job but it was getting more difficult. I did part time jobs and went as far as writing for ...
A. 12 January 2009: No, you are not mean. You are a saint. I have a friend that married that guy. She still loves him to this day, but she divorced him anyway. She see's him all the time and he has never changed. You need to break off now but not completely. Give him ... (read in full...)
Why don't any of these guys have feelings for me?
Q. Brace yourself people this is going to be a long one Grrr, right what is wrong with all the males I meet after reading this question please do not tell me that I need to stop going for the same kind of guy because really everything about...
A. 12 January 2009: Yea, guy number two sounds ok. He was honest with you that he doesnt want a relationship right now. All you can do is worry about yourself and do whats best for you. The right guy will come along as long as you put yourself out there. It could be ... (read in full...)
Newly married husband looking at porn, I'm disgusted
Q. My new husband has been looking at naked women on Craigslist and now I feel disgusted with him. It makes me feel like we are not special. It makes me feel like he thinks of other women when having sex with him and now I don't really want to have ...
A. 12 January 2009: I agree with alot of what pvtguy says, But withholding sex from him will only make it worse. He probably didnt realize how much this would be a problem for you even when you asked him about it before you got married. I can tell you from experience ... (read in full...)
| *old4this's friends
These are mutual friends, so *old4this has
added them and they have added *old4this!
|
