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... Send *old4this a private message | | | *old4this's profile:I am a male age 41. I reside in the US. I am married for several years and have experience dealing with young love in a deep emotional manner. I believe that the majority of people under the age of 30 have had the same types of problems in relationships. Experienced advice helps because it helped me. |
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He told me he ended their affair... but I found out he hasn't and I'm heartbroken...
Q. My husband had an affair a year ago, I found out after two weeks, he ended it and we stayed together. I found out a week ago that he did not end the affair it has been going on all the time. He has left me for her and I am totally broken, we have ...
A. 28 March 2009: When you love someone so much that you build your whole life around them, thats when it seems like the world ends when they leave. The truth is your husband is a moron. And you CAN live without him, right now you just don't want to. He made his ... (read in full...)
Negative pg test and you turned out to be pregnant?
Q. So I havent had my "normal" period since the first week in December. In January I had alittle bit of bleeding for 2 days but then it stopped and I havent had anything since then. I have taken 3 urine test and 1 blood test recently and they all ...
A. 27 March 2009: go get an ultasound. That should tell you for sure. ... (read in full...)
Drifting away and always in a bad mood..why?
Q. I started talking to this really great guy a few weeks back. He goes to the same school as me but I don't really see him around much so we mostly talked through IM and texting. We seemed to really hit it off- we have the same interests, same ...
A. 27 March 2009: I don't think it has anything to do with you. He probably still has some strong feelings for his ex that he is not gonna share with you right now. I don't think he is trying to get rid of you, but maybe just try backing off a little bit. Maybe let ... (read in full...)
I don't want to give up on him but he is pushing me away.
Q. I've been with this guy for 5 months now: 2 months ago he's lost his job. I've been trying to keep him happy doing all he has ask(like sex, money, cooking 4 him, washing his clothes, etc.). We don't live together but he stays 2 blocks from my house. ...
A. 26 March 2009: I think you have to leave him for your own sanity. He does sound like he is very bipolar. First off he needs to go get some meds from a doc to help him with it. It could make him act better overall but he will always have problems with it from time ... (read in full...)
Secret rendezvous with my ex's mum, is that OK?
Q. It was my birthday yesterday and my ex-girlfriend's Mum called me to wish me happy birthday. We have always got on so it's not unusual for her to call me. During the call, she said that she was preparing a surprise for me and would send it to my ...
A. 26 March 2009: Ok, if an ex girl of mine started seeing or just messing around with my dad, yea it would be wierd. But you know, that has no bearing on what my ex does if she and I are not even friends anymore. It would be an issue with me and my dad only. So if ... (read in full...)
Secret rendezvous with my ex's mum, is that OK?
Q. It was my birthday yesterday and my ex-girlfriend's Mum called me to wish me happy birthday. We have always got on so it's not unusual for her to call me. During the call, she said that she was preparing a surprise for me and would send it to my ...
A. 26 March 2009: I love this. The guys are all for it and the girls are dead against it. It shows you the difference in how guys and girls think. The bottom line ladies, he is not with his ex anymore which is why they call it an ex. And unless he and his ex still ... (read in full...)
He loves and cares about me but just wants to be friends
Q. I recently entered into a relationship 3 months ago with a really great guy, and he told me that he felt a lot towards me, the time we spent together was just heaven and I was convinced that he was in love with me so I allowed my guard down. He bro...
A. 26 March 2009: Some of that may be true Tewebag, But the bottom line is that this guy is playing games and it is time for you to clean break the relationship. Move on hon, and I'm a guy too so I also know. There is a chance he really cares for you, he just aint ... (read in full...)
Done the right thing or am I pushing him right to her?
Q. I have just been married for ten years. We have been having some problems. Nothing I did not think we could not work through. I just found out he has been talking to an old girlfriend from 20 years ago. He hid it from me. Of course I live in a ...
A. 26 March 2009: Yea, something has gone wrong at least in his mind with your relationship. It may be something very simple to fix. Either way, you guys need some help I think. I'm not gonna lie, you may have given him the excuse he was looking for to go be with ... (read in full...)
1 of 2 guys could be the daddy
Q. Ok im 15 years old im goin to be 16 in november. My boyfriend is 24 whom will be 25 in october. Come to find out im pregnant. The thing is, is that im not so sure who the father is...It can be one out of two people.... my boyfriend that i have been ...
A. 26 March 2009: You should talk to your parents. You pretty much have to. As far as the daddy, its probably your boyfriends because you used protection with the other guy. But if you are still not sure then when the baby is born you must get a paternity test. As ... (read in full...)
He doesn't show me as much attention when we're with friends...
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for about 3 months now (officially). The first couple months were good, great in fact.. We have the same friends and are in the same "circle" of friends.. In this group, there more single guys than couples. I'm ...
A. 25 March 2009: It's not really a big deal. My girlfriend is similar to that and we been together for 3 years. If maybe you want to hang out more as a group then just let him know.... (read in full...)
How do you get tested for HIV/AIDS? Is it a urine test? or what?
Q. This is probably going to be a long one but I'm worried! Recently I've been thinking about getting a HIV test but I'm too scared to do it and to tell anyone, I'm not sure if I'm positive or not, I've had sexual intercourse with about 7 people u...
A. 25 March 2009: You get a blood test from a doctor. You ARE a little too active with no protection my friend. I think you should tell your dad anyway, then go and get the test. You will get the results in a few days. If everything comes out ok, then maybe you ... (read in full...)
I'm a young female adult who has become wary about my pubic mound!
Q. I'm a young female adult who has become wary about my pubic mound. I never thought about it too much but became paranoid once my mum pointed out that it sticks out, after that I've noticed that it's different to others and is noticable. Is it normal ...
A. 25 March 2009: Well, how big are we talking? My girls area is a little more "pronounced" than some others ,but nothing that makes anyone stare at her in a bathing suit. If you have a obgyn, ask there opinion about it and see what they say. ... (read in full...)
What do you think I should do about what this guy (jerk) said about me?
Q. This guy I work with is very nice and friendly to me when I visit him at his office (I am a contractor to his company). He treats me like he likes me as a friend. I encountered him last Friday at the mall and he was making a move on a girl in a c...
A. 25 March 2009: Why is this bothering you so much? It just sounds like he wanted her to know that you and he are not involved or anything so he could still run his game on her. You guys are just work aquaintances right? Sure he could have said something else but it ... (read in full...)
I am extremely controlling.. can someone help me?
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been going out for 2 and a half years now and I am extremely controlling! I tell him that he cannot talk to girls and that he can't look at girls and that he can't be friends with girls! We fight all the time about this but ...
A. 25 March 2009: I'm thinking he must really love you if this has been going on for that long and he is still around. You're gonna have to learn to let love in at all costs. What I mean is that you cant be in fear of losing him. If you two are happy together then ... (read in full...)
His lack of intimacy makes me think he might be gay! Your thoughts?
Q. Why my boyfriend is not interested in itimacy? I have been dating a guy I met for a couple of months. He was in a long marriage and his wife left him. I would say this guy has some feminine characteristics even in his walk. His house has no clu...
A. 25 March 2009: This is tough. He could have some deep down problems. He could be fighting his homosexuality. Has he ever told you why his wife left? Maybe get him discussing that first and you could get some clues. I personally don't think I could ever be in bed ... (read in full...)
Had drunk sex with a friend is there still a chance?
Q. Ok this is a really confusing and complex situation and I need some guys point of view on this but ladies feel free to help ;) I've been friends with this great guy for about a year now and we went to college together. We're both pretty much...
A. 1 February 2009: After you messaged me I read it again and yea, deffinitely let him make the next moves. Play it cool. But I will say if you find yourself in an intimate situation with him don't be afraid to get a little close to him and kinda test the water a ... (read in full...)
I think of my ex and my heart aches for him
Q. I have been with a man for five years now and love him very dearly. I have been with him since my junior year in high school. Before him I was with a man for five years off and on. Well recently I have found myself thinking about my ex and my heart ...
A. 31 January 2009: Your current relationship might be missing something recently. It's making you want for the old days when life was probably simpler. Maybe you felt more loved then I dont know. Try to find that spark with your current guy again. I wouldnt try to ... (read in full...)
Had drunk sex with a friend is there still a chance?
Q. Ok this is a really confusing and complex situation and I need some guys point of view on this but ladies feel free to help ;) I've been friends with this great guy for about a year now and we went to college together. We're both pretty much...
A. 31 January 2009: The outlook is not good. For one, he just doesnt seem interested in what you are interested in. Which is understandable for a guy his age. I feel like you should just remain friends with him, but not too close of friends otherwise thats what you ... (read in full...)
The age difference is freaking me out! How do I forget him?
Q. There's been this guy that I had been asking questions about lately. He and I have known each other for about five years; have become really close friends for 2 1/2 to 3 years and have started really flirting back and forth since last summer. He w...
A. 31 January 2009: Seriously? You were ok with 50 but not 60? No offense, but this guy is probably gonna pass away by the time you are 45 or so. Please, don't get me wrong, love is what it is. But age most certainly does matter in a lot of cases. His life experiences ... (read in full...)
Hockey game w/co-worker--husband says its a date!
Q. I am going to hockey game with a male co- worker. He knows that I am married and we are just friends. My husband is really bothered by it because he said that men and women can not be just friends.My husband said that I am going on a date and ...
A. 31 January 2009: Look at it this way. Your husband says i'm going to a ball game with patty, this friend of mine. You don't know this girl. Are you ok with that? If it's you and about 3 or 4 other guys and girls going together, then he probably wont worry much. But ... (read in full...)
I rushed into marriage and now another guy is looking good
Q. I'm 19 and i've been married for two years my husband is 24 we've been very happy for the past years but lately he's been treating me like he doesn't love me. i've talked to him about it and he says that he'll try to change but it only lasts about a ...
A. 31 January 2009: It sounds pretty clear to me that you still love your husband very much, just not his behavior. Both of you guys are still very young and I can tell you your husband still has some things to learn about life and marraige too. Your "friend" doesnt ... (read in full...)
I love him but I didn't want to have sex
Q. im a 22yrs old and i lost my virginity last month to my bf of 11 months. i was saving my self for marriage b\c its part of my religion. my bf pressured me into doing it but i started to cry during it and he stopped. the next day he tried again and i ...
A. 31 January 2009: Just put your foot down and tell him you will when you are ready but if he wants to have a relationship with you he better back off. If he keeps up with it, dump him and move on because you are better than that.... (read in full...)
Should I stay with husband? Or go to lover?
Q. I had an affair for about 7 months, both my lover and I told our spouses.Both of our spouses want to try and work on our marriages.My lover said he told his wife he would give the marriage another chance. So we were stopped visiting and only...
A. 31 January 2009: Your marraige is over. You don't love him and do not want to be with him. I think that you and your lover are very selfish giving your spouses false hope. You both need to leave them even if not to be with each other. Who wants to be in a loveless ... (read in full...)
My ex wants me back and my current b/f has given me an ultimatium. I don't know what to do!
Q. Please can someone help me. I have been given an ultimatum by my boyfriend of 6 months and I am not sure what to do. I am happy with my current boyfriend in every way apart from the fact he has been smoking weed and taking cocaine occasionally for ...
A. 28 January 2009: You really got two bad situations. Personally I think you should kick them both to the curb and start fresh. You have stated that your current guy, although not perfect, has been trying really hard for you. But, it sounds like you know deep down ... (read in full...)
What is it with guys when they blow hot and cold all the time?
Q. I just started a relationship with this guy a few days ago. And he says, "Let's take off somewhere for the weekend." I thought he was kidding, but apparently not. He asked me again last night if I had requested a few days off from work. I was...
A. 28 January 2009: He likes you and wants sex from you and hasnt figured out how long he has to wait or how to get it.... (read in full...)
I love them both but not in the same way
Q. Ok... I have a problem... A big one at that too. I am in love with a guy (Lets call him Demon) and am ready to marry him whenever he wants. I love Demon with all my heart. The thing is... I also love another guy (I'll call him Angel). It's not how I ...
A. 28 January 2009: Well, thats wierd that the one you really like you call demon and the other one you call angel. Whats that mean to you? What do you mean you love angel but not how you love demon? Look, you cant have two guys. So you are gonna have to let one go. ... (read in full...)
My wife seems to do well if I treat her like a 12 year old
Q. I have been married for about a year now. As I get to know my wife better who turned 28 recently, here is the lowdown. She has low self-esteem, is needy, overly jealous, has some symptoms of dependent personality if internet sites are to be ...
A. 28 January 2009: That is commendable that you wan to work on it, but probably not good. If you are miserable I don't think you should stay. But, talk to her. Tell her how you feel. If she doesnt get it then go to marraige counciling. I do think you should try ... (read in full...)
Best friend in love with me
Q. my best girl friend said she was in love with me but i don't swing that way and i still want to be friends so what do i say to that?...
A. 28 January 2009: Let her down gently. Tell her the truth that you just dont like girls like that but you value her friendship. I'm not gonna lie, she might not talk to you anymore. But, I think you gotta let her know. She probably figures as much anyway but is just ... (read in full...)
No teeth please!
Q. my girlfriend loves giving me head and luvs to swallow, not to sound ungreatful but she isnt very good at it. her teeth get in the way and my penis is very sensitive and after a while it begins to hurt resulting in me not being able to cum.is there ...
A. 28 January 2009: Well, you are in a tough spot. On one hand if you tell her then she might stop doing it altogether. On the other hand you dont tell her and she grinds off an inch a year. You have to delicately tell her whats going on. If she really likes doing it ... (read in full...)
How do you know if you're fat?
Q. I'm 5ft. tall 136 pounds and every one calls me fat my mom and dad most of my friends not all but most. So is that fat?...
A. 28 January 2009: Well I dont think I would call you fat. Maybe a little short for your weight. I think all those people who call you fat are a little rude. If you did lose weight, I wouldnt lose more than 20 at the most. But I can't see you right now. If you feel ... (read in full...)
Should I make her or let her go?
Q. This is my first post on this site. I have a perplexing problem. My wife and I have some new friends. We have been going over to their home on the weekend. Sometimes it is rather docile. Sometimes it is not. We drink alcohol and chat. There are ...
A. 28 January 2009: Hey mommyofone, I dont think we have read the same thing. This guy is upset not by her cutting loose and having a little fun, but by her disregard of his feelings. Nobody not even him is saying she can't go out and have fun with friends. But she is ... (read in full...)
Should I move on or ask her out again?
Q. I think I've probably been rejected, albeit gently. There's this girl that I really like. Right now we're pretty good friends with each other. I even gave her a surprise birthday present a while back, and return she made this cute plushie for...
A. 28 January 2009: Ask her out to dinner, on a date where you can talk. Make sure she knows it's a date and you may get your answer before hand. Anyway, start up the conversation over dinner. Just tell her the truth. Yes, there is a big chance of rejection. There ... (read in full...)
Should I move on or ask her out again?
Q. I think I've probably been rejected, albeit gently. There's this girl that I really like. Right now we're pretty good friends with each other. I even gave her a surprise birthday present a while back, and return she made this cute plushie for...
A. 27 January 2009: If you really like her then you have to not be one of her "brothers". Sometimes you have to tell them "hey I like you and all but I got enough friends. I'm looking for something more" You have to find out if she likes you, and if she doesn't then ... (read in full...)
Should I make her or let her go?
Q. This is my first post on this site. I have a perplexing problem. My wife and I have some new friends. We have been going over to their home on the weekend. Sometimes it is rather docile. Sometimes it is not. We drink alcohol and chat. There are ...
A. 27 January 2009: Getting a little drunk and acting stupid is one thing, but getting or performing sexual acts with other people than you is unacceptible. This is her desire to be with others coming out yet again. I would not be surprised if there are other sexual ... (read in full...)
Heaven for the trolls and immature people on the internet? the haters?
Q. Why are people so incredibly mean on the internet? I'm just really wondering. I know that people say that they don't have a heart and they are just starring at a pixel or username, but why do those immature brats keep forgetting about the person...
A. 27 January 2009: because the anonymity of the internet lets people be jackasses just for the heck of it. To alot of people, those other forums are there as a joke so they treat it as such. I know this is a rotten example, but I liked to play a popular online game ... (read in full...)
I cant make new friends!
Q. Hi. I have been trying to make new friends for about a year. I got out of a long relationship a year and a half ago, graduated from college like 3 yrs. ago and changed churches, got older (LOL), quit a job...etc. A lot of things have changed in my ...
A. 25 January 2009: well, how did you meet your original friends? Most people met their long term friends either in school or in a job when they are young and grew up together. A good young church or job would help. Plus, you are probably alot more picky now than when ... (read in full...)
Wnats the big deaL?
Q. Me and my girlfriend (of 4 years) went to a bar last week (it was her birthday). Long story short I had a bit to much drink. (this is what she told me b/c I don't really remember the night very well) I started flirting with a random woman in front ...
A. 25 January 2009: the big deal is you got plastered and flirted with another girl right in front of her ON HER BIRTHDAY!!!! Are you slow? Dude, your girlfriend was supposed to be first on your mind that day not getting drunk or flirting and throwing up on her. That ... (read in full...)
He's amazing but he's a total manwhore, what do I do?
Q. k to start off, i'm 17 (grade 11) and my boyfriend's name is kris, he's in grade 10 (16) but verrrrry cute:) i think he's amazing, basically perfect. since he's extremely popular, amazingly hot, a gentlemen, good listener, caring and the whole pa...
A. 23 January 2009: YOU CANNOT CHANGE HIM!!!! If he changes it will because he WANTS to. And trust me it's going to take YEARS before he becomes IF EVER what you want him to be. If you like him take him for what he is. Besides, it sounds like you mainly only want to be ... (read in full...)
He's amazing but he's a total manwhore, what do I do?
Q. k to start off, i'm 17 (grade 11) and my boyfriend's name is kris, he's in grade 10 (16) but verrrrry cute:) i think he's amazing, basically perfect. since he's extremely popular, amazingly hot, a gentlemen, good listener, caring and the whole pa...
A. 22 January 2009: First of all if a guy says hes slept with like 10 girls its probably more like 2 or 3. But even if he is that much of a hound it sounds like he likes you alot if he hasnt done anything in a while like you said. DONT give it up to him if you dont ... (read in full...)
Two dates later, should I start leaving my weekends open for him?
Q. Ok, so I just started dating this guy about a week ago. He's like when do you want to go out again, Friday or Saturday? I answered, "Saturday." I'm thinking we're not exclusive yet..not sure. I don't want to ask him. But the thing is he didn...
A. 22 January 2009: Typical. He's trying to gage your interest with him by giving you suttle hints. It sounds like he is trying to get you to make the first move. Thats kinda a wussy thing but maybe he just doesnt want to come on too strong. I say if you like him tell ... (read in full...)
Twisted relationship with cousin
Q. I have had and am having sexual relations with my cousin. He is my age. We are both 16. I have always kind of liked him but never said anything because he is my cousin obviously. So nobody ever knew. The summer before 8th grade he started feeling ...
A. 22 January 2009: He is is your moms brothers/sisters son or your dads brothers/ sisters son. First cousin, at least that I can tell. Yea, you GOTTA end this. This is an ocean of taboo trouble you dont want. I liked a girl when I was younger who turned out to be a ... (read in full...)
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