Rude and awkward flatmate seems to fancy me. What should I do?
Q. I'm doing two semesters at another uni and moved in in January, so I'll be here till September. It's a mixed flat and everyone kinda gets on well, I don't dislike anyone including him. I sometimes hang out with them and sometimes with friends I have ...
A. 16 March 2018: I think you are making way more of this than you need to. Your flatmate sounds like he may be a little socially awkward and trying to make up for it by trying too hard to be the opposite, hence his interrogatory manner and constant assurances of how ... (read in full...)
How do approach him about what I heard?
Q. Hi everyone my boyfriend of 4 years pocket dialled me yesterday while he was at work I overheard him and his mate on about some woman who was fit and my fiancé says I didn’t notice surprisingly we have had trust issues in the past due to his roving ...
A. 16 March 2018: Being engaged to you does not make him blind to the attractions of others. As long as he is only looking (and appreciating), then that should not be cause for alarm.
I assume you are inferring in your post that the "I didn't notice" response... (read in full...)
Bf doesn't want to come to my graduation ceremony. Is this an indicator that our relationship is not worth my while?
Q. My boyfriend of one year does not want to come to my graduation ceremony, and honestly I'm pretty upset but don't know what to do. I don't want to force him, and i just dropped the subject. so I don't know what to think of our relationship if he ...
A. 14 March 2018: Have you asked him WHY he doesn't want to come? Have you explained to him how important this is to you and why?... (read in full...)
Family and friends want me to present as more "girly girl."
Q. I’m a girl, I’m not really girly but I don’t dress like a guy either. I just prefer to wear normal casual clothes like a crop top a bomber and nice jeans, vs heels and dresses. I don’t wear makeup, I don’t judge people that do but they seem to judge ...
A. 13 March 2018: Oh dear me. If all women were as casual about what they wore, and as comfortable without make-up as you appear to be, do you realize how many industries would crash overnight? You go, girl. Be yourself. Don't let anyone tell you how you should dress ... (read in full...)
Will my ex treat his new girlfriend better because of me? I feel I gave 110%!
Q. I was in a toxic relationship for almost 3 years. We broke up several times but always got back together. While we had good times, his narcissistic personality traits made things difficult and left me feeling hurt and confused. He tended to be ...
A. 12 March 2018: Sweetheart, you know in your heart he was not right for you. It doesn't matter how great your sex life was (you can't spend your life in bed) or how fond you were of him. You two were just not meant to be together.
It doesn't really matter h... (read in full...)
My dad has always put me down and I'm afraid the damage is permanent
Q. My self esteem has come a long way from the criticism I experienced from my dad. Currently I have a good job and a happy relationship. Some days though I feel down. My dad always had something negative to say, from the way I sung in my church to ...
A. 12 March 2018: If only parents realized what harm they can do their children. Having said that, you have succeeded in moving on in the sense that you have a good job and a happy relationship. Hold onto those positives in your life.
Your dad's attitude towards ... (read in full...)
I pushed him away, do I still have a chance?
Q. I met a really great guy in January but pushed him away with my insecurities. We live 2 hours apart but he always called/texted/facetimed me first. Two weeks into us getting to know each other I saw that some girl commented on a Facebook picture. He ...
A. 11 March 2018: I think you are asking the wrong question here. You need to be asking "Why am I like this and what can I do to stop?"
This guy has dodged a bullet. Now you need to leave him alone (although I somehow doubt you will) and work on healing yourself... (read in full...)
Why do I feel so rotten when he hurt me so much?
Q. I made a huge mistake, I've been in a relationship for many years, I have been hurt very badly. Yet I continued to go back time and time again. Long story short he is in a bad place and I tried to be nice and it back fired, now all the I'm sorry's ...
A. 11 March 2018: Because you are a nice person and nice people don't like hurting others, regardless of what hurt they have suffered at their hands.
Now you need to be nice to YOURSELF. Guilt is a completely useless emotion. It achieves nothing. Put YOURSELF... (read in full...)
She says her married boyfriend will get jealous if we have sex.
Q. I met this girl, after speaking for weeks, we met for casual sex. It was great and she seemed to be enjoying it. We were probably busy for 2-3 hours. She even asked me to whip her, first time for me but she enjoyed it. She was good and was eager to ...
A. 11 March 2018: She's using you to make him jealous. Is this all you think yo are worth?
Cut contact, block her and find yourself someone who is interested in you and you alone. She is only interested in her married bloke.
YOU DESERVE BETTER. ... (read in full...)
What should I do with a badly behaved dog?
Q. I have a bit of a problem and just wanting advice. I have a dog but I have had for 10 years since I was 20 years old I probably been through more with the dog than anyone in my life. he's always been a bit of a problem and recently I am living in a ...
A. 10 March 2018: It sounds like you love your dog very much but it also sounds like he is bored and frustrated when you are not around. To put this into perspective, lock yourself in a small room with absolutely NOTHING in it. All you are allowed to do is sit/lie ... (read in full...)
Do I try to Facebook this aquaintance from my past? Or is it really awkward or inappropriate?
Q. Yesterday when cleaning.. iv found some old pics of me and my old dance teacher,he was a gay guy we got on well. I was wondering..should I friend request him on Facebook? I’m female and I was not attracted to him!! Im also gay and ...
A. 10 March 2018: What have you got to lose? He can only ignore your request. I suspect, from what you have said though, that he will not ignore it.
If you know where he works, why not "bump into him" accidentally and ask if he fancies a coffee and a catch up... (read in full...)
I could be in a relationship if I hadn't pushed him away
Q. I still have feelings for someone and it has been 4 years now , I feel really odd and obsessive for still having feelings for him . we didn't speak for very long because of my behaviour as I got really worried when he told me he liked me and I ...
A. 9 March 2018: I would concentrate SOLELY on the nasty things he said to you. Whatever you did, there is never a need to be nasty. He could have just walked away. He chose to retaliate with spite. The person you are obsessed with is the person you have built him ... (read in full...)
He's acting as if I don't exist.
Q. Should I try to make this work? Me and my boyfriend took a little break from each other because of him constantly keeping in touch with his ex that he got out of a relationship with because of me a few months ago. We worked it out and things were ...
A. 9 March 2018: Why do you think you are not worth better than this? You KNOW he is not only texting his ex but asking for nude pictures.
Look in the mirror, tell yourself loudly and firmly, "I am worth more than this", then dump his sorry backside and leave hi... (read in full...)
I like him but can't take the disresect anymore.
Q. Hi. I met a guy recently and we stared talking online . He said he is looking for something serious with me and is not here to waste time. At first I tried to invest my time in him by answering his calls in the morning and at night which ruined my ...
A. 9 March 2018: So he is only nice if you do exactly as he wants the second he wants? And even then it is not what YOU want.
Also, for someone who has never even met you to be saying he wants something serious with you - surely that has to ring alarm bells. ... (read in full...)
What is the best way to end my obsession with my co-worker?
Q. Hello, I am a happily a married woman with a 4yr old daughter and an awesome husband. With that said I want nothing more than to have crazy (50 shades of grey) sex with my coworker who is also married with 3 kids and one on the way. It started ...
A. 9 March 2018: So, you are being unfaithful to your husband. Don't pretend that, just because you and your lust buddy haven't done anything physical yet, you have not been unfaithful. You are taking away energy from your marriage and investing it in this lothario. ... (read in full...)
She wants my opinion, but if shr knew what my opinion was, she wouldn't want it!
Q. I've got a friend I've known since kindergarten. We've been through a lot and our friendship is strong. I care about her, but I'm not blind. She is pretty self-centered. Over the years we worked on our relationship and I had to set up some boundari...
A. 7 March 2018: Firstly, the child will not be a child forever. While it MAY help with her feelings of loneliness, it is not like having a partner of equal age. The child will be completely reliant on her for the first few years of its life. What will she do for ... (read in full...)
What if I’m not his first?
Q. I've recently fallen in love with one of my guy friends who has been in love with me for 8 years but I never felt the same until now. I don't know for sure if he's a virgin or not, he's very good at somethings but feels a little "shy" in others. ...
A. 5 March 2018: Seriously? You expected him to wait 8 years in the vague hope you would one day give him a chance and abstain from all contact with other females in the meantime?
I would strongly suggest you do not ask whether you are his first. If he voluntee... (read in full...)
I haven’t heard from him in 3 days!
Q. Hi guys thanks for reading. I need help please and advise on what to do. I’ve been talkin to a guy I met on a dating site. We have meet up a few times, talk on the phone and text. But I havnt heard from him in 3 days. I only sent 1 text saying ‘...
A. 5 March 2018: What are you waiting for? Drop him a message, asking "Everything ok?" There could be 101 reasons why he has not got in touch, ranging from personal to business. There is nothing to say you have to sit there and wait for him to get in touch. Perhaps ... (read in full...)
Should I try a free cuddle buddy website?
Q. Does anyone have experience with free cuddle buddy websites or know anyone who has used one? I may sign up for one and would like to hear other people's experiences with it because I'm not ready for another relationship, but I do miss being cuddles ...
A. 4 March 2018: I am sure there must be a forum or two out there which caters for this sort of "therapy". As you say you have already done research into this, perhaps you need to do a little more and find such a forum? You would be better posting your question on ... (read in full...)
I used to love my friend but now she gives me anxiety
Q. A few years ago, I was very close with my friend. We had similar interests and always had a conversation topic. However, since last August, she seemed very cold and distant. She started hating anything I liked and sided with anyone else in a...
A. 4 March 2018: I suspect your friend (assuming she is the same age as you) is just being a teenager. She is taking out her hormonal moods and tempers on you because she knows you well and feels safe doing so. She doesn't feel this safe and comfortable with others, ... (read in full...)
Should I try a free cuddle buddy website?
Q. Does anyone have experience with free cuddle buddy websites or know anyone who has used one? I may sign up for one and would like to hear other people's experiences with it because I'm not ready for another relationship, but I do miss being cuddles ...
A. 4 March 2018: I can't imagine you will get many (if any) replies from people with actual experience of what you are thinking of trying. After all, it is not something exactly main stream. (I suspect most people will consider it a bit weird and a bit creepy.) Most ... (read in full...)
Why are other people so negative?
Q. Why are people always negative or trying to make me feel small. What is it that I do? From a young age, I have always had to deal with negativity. As a result I have become auto-pilot positive in response (could call it defensive). I often realised...
A. 4 March 2018: OK, think aloud here and totally shooting in the dark (because I don't know you or your friends, and I have obviously not been there when these discussions have occurred).
Is it possible you change as a person when things are going well for you?... (read in full...)
How should I reply to his text?
Q. Hi Thank you for reading. I dated a guy for 7 months last year. He dumped me in late December, saying that he felt that our relationship wasn’t moving forward as quickly as he wanted. He wanted me to move in with him and I didn’t feel ready...
A. 3 March 2018: What do you WANT to do?
Personally, I would ignore the text completely. You are doing ok without him. In fact, you are doing well without him. Why get back in contact with someone you feel let you down when you needed them most? Fair weather ... (read in full...)
His female friend makes me uncomfortable!
Q. My boyfriend's female friend makes me uncomfortable. He is always adoring me most times. But when we all hang out and she drinks, she rubs his head,or hugs him when I leave the room; she lifted his shirt to see his belt buckle design. It drives me ...
A. 3 March 2018: I assumed this was a post by a teenager, then saw your age. Sweetheart, you are better than this!
He may have known her for a long time but he chose to date YOU. Either this is just normal behaviour for her after years of friendship with him, or ... (read in full...)
I think I’m falling for someone who has a woman!
Q. I think im falling for someone who has a woman.... We met at my job about 4 months go, when his lady was on her way to jail.. She has to sit out a year and a half in there, ans though they're still "together" hes still spending all hos time with me ...
A. 2 March 2018: Cheating can never be justified - even if your boyfriend is doing it. You have gone from one cheater to another (he hasn't yet but you know he probably will). If he is cheating WITH you, he will cheat ON you.
Dump the boyfriend. You don't sound li... (read in full...)
How should I react to this coversation between him and her?
Q. Ok, so I am going out with an older man, he is 16 years older than me(me 30 he is 46), divorced no children,we get along really well,and he treats me super nice,he is a gentleman and much more,we don’t have a lot of time of being together,yet we ...
A. 2 March 2018: I can understand her wanting a photograph before meeting him (search Suzy Lamplugh and see what can happen to loan females showing people round properties). She may have forwarded the photograph on to a friend/colleague "just in case". Nothing weird ... (read in full...)
I friend zoned him, he is trying to be more, which annoys me!
Q. I have known this guy for 4 months, everything was good and we had a very good connection. After a while, he started falling for me, he confessed his feeling to me and he wanted a relationship. He was so desperate for my love which turned me off a ...
A. 2 March 2018: Take some advice from someone who has been there and experienced that. You two have very different agendas. Being his "best friend" is not going to work. He wants more. The only way forward is to break all contact until he has moved on. Even then ... (read in full...)
I'm offended that my FWB didn't believe me when I said I'd taken the morning-after pill.
Q. Hi all... So I’ve been in a kind of friends with benefits relationship with an older guy for almost a year, but we’ve had sex maybe like 10 times in all. Just some background, he’s separated and I’m just single. We have a good friendship, but we ...
A. 2 March 2018: You feel as you feel. There is no right or wrong about it. If you feel offended, then that is your right. I suspect your feelings really stem from the realization that, while you are good enough to provide occasional sexual relief, the thought of ... (read in full...)
He doesn't want children but I want one of my own
Q. I feel like ive wasted my time , my boyfriend ( of 4 month) just blurted out he doesnt want kids .We havent talked about having any or any anytime soon. i dont know why he just said it , he already has 2 ( pre teen )but i always wanted one and he ...
A. 28 February 2018: If you don't like him for himself, then you need to walk away. It is his right not to want more children, just as it is your right to want one.
Do bear in mind that (1) you may not find someone else in time who wants to have a child with you and ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend still trying to get back with his ex but he can't love her! He gave me the ring
Q. what should I do? So for the past few weeks I’ve been on here trying to get advice. Trying to figure out if I’m a rebound or not. A week ago he was still hitting up his ex trying to give her oral sex, as well as physical sex. She turned him down ...
A. 28 February 2018: Not sure if this is a wind-up or not but going to work on the (very sad) presumption it is genuine.
OP, is this all you are worth? A silly ring? I mean, REALLY? Why do you not think you are worth more? Like someone who is loyal and faithful... (read in full...)
Close friend is abusive toward her husband, should I reach out to him?
Q. I never really approved of their marriage, because she really rushed it and she is young, 23, while her husband and I are the same age, 29. They married 10 months after we all met despite everyone telling them to wait, because she kept pressuring ...
A. 27 February 2018: You feel empathy for him because you have suffered abuse of a similar sort in the past yourself. However, everyone's situation is different and every relationship is unique. This is an adult man who, regardless of pressure, CHOSE to marry this ... (read in full...)
Am I a girlfriend or an atm?
Q. so i met this guy some few months ago for us it was love at first sight or so i thought.we kept on dating and at some point he was broke and i would give whatever i had on me without him asking.later on he got the courage to start asking for cash ...
A. 27 February 2018: Sweetheart, if you are asking the question then you already know, in your heart, what the answer is.
Every time you think about him, repeat (aloud or in your head, depending on where you are), I DESERVE BETTER, I DESERVE BETTER, I DESERVE ... (read in full...)
I don't understand his behaviour.
Q. I am in a long distance relationship. I once got married and it already got annuled. My bf now is undergoing annulment. We've kniwn each other since we were i college but it never became us because of wrong timing. Everytime he'd be single, id have ...
A. 26 February 2018: I think you dodged a bullet there, sweetheart. He has shown his true colours early on. Is this how you want you relationship to be? Lots of shouting and anger and falling out? Never mind his precious male ego. What about YOUR right not to be shouted ... (read in full...)
I've accepted his past so why can't he move past mine?
Q. Hi I'm 18 and my boyfriend of nearly two months is 19. When we first met (a couple of months before we started dating) we spoke about our body counts. I've been with a few guys and he's been with a few girls, nothing major or too far, just as you'd ...
A. 26 February 2018: P.S. Forgot to add, do NOT, under any circumstances, feel you need to apologize to him for your past.
P.P.S. Make sure you are using effective contraception.... (read in full...)
I've accepted his past so why can't he move past mine?
Q. Hi I'm 18 and my boyfriend of nearly two months is 19. When we first met (a couple of months before we started dating) we spoke about our body counts. I've been with a few guys and he's been with a few girls, nothing major or too far, just as you'd ...
A. 26 February 2018: Well, obviously you were not "forced" to do anything. You are mature enough to be able to think "he comes with a past and, while I may not like it, there is nothing I can do to change it so I have to accept it".
I wonder whether part of his relu... (read in full...)
My wife won't allow me to choose our son's name, constantly undermines me and hates me
Q. My wife is 33 weeks pregnant with our first son. Today she started to fight with me. I had chosen a name for our child. She didn't even pay attention. I picked her up from the church today and she announced that she wants our son to be named by...
A. 25 February 2018: Firstly and most importantly, you are going to be a father. Regardless of the difficulties between you and your wife, your son will always be your son and will need you to be involved in his life. Have you heard the Shakespeare line, "A rose by any ... (read in full...)
My dad is a nasty drunk, his mom is deaf... How can I combine both our lives?
Q. I have been speaking to this guy for a while, we have recently made it official. He met my parents the other day, and my father, got really very drunk (he is a drunk, we’ve tried so many times to get him to stop but he just won’t) I am now worried ...
A. 25 February 2018: Well, regarding the deaf mum, you need to ask your boyfriend how to communicate with her. Does she lip read? If so, speak clearly and make sure she can see your mouth when you are speaking to her. If she communicates by sign language, get your ... (read in full...)
Do I need to say something to head off this student?
Q. Hello, I’ve written in before and now I have a really awkward situation that doesn’t have too much to do with my parents. Part of their rules about me going to school here is that I am not to work. They give me $20 a week for hygiene items or if I ...
A. 25 February 2018: If you can't tell your parents you are doing a bit of "work" to earn some extra money, how are you going to tell them you are moving into an apartment? Or are you going to keep that secret from them too? Surely you can pass it off as needing the ... (read in full...)
Was I too keen?
Q. I went out with someone and I wasn't sure if it was a date or just friends. Partly this is because his whole manner is very formal and polite - although now and again he surprises me by doing things like swearing or he breaks through the politeness ...
A. 24 February 2018: Sweetheart, for crying out loud, listen to your friend (who you admit knows you well and who appears to talk a lot of sense) and STOP READING RUBBISH WRITTEN ON THE INTERNET BY RANDOM STRANGERS. These people don't know you, they don't know your ex ... (read in full...)
Am I in the wrong or not with regard to my situation?
Q. Hi all. Im in deep need of advice to see if im in the wrong or not on my situation. Ive been with my guy for almost 6 yrs now. When I first met him, he was a drinker and a weed smoker. And thru the years he hasnt stopped either the drinking or the ...
A. 22 February 2018: You left a drunk man in charge of your 8 year old child? Do you think that was wise? Do you think it is wise for your child to see not only HIS addictions but also your relationship and fighting?
As for being supportive, come on. Saying somethin... (read in full...)
I'm still not over her after all these years but she has a 2 year old daughter and says she's done with dating. Should I still persevere?
Q. So a little backstory… I've been crushing on this girl since high school and you could say I got hit hard. I never had the courage to ask her out; because it's high school she was way out of my league back then. I've put her in this pedestal...
A. 22 February 2018: Well, first of all I think you need to give yourself time to get over YOUR break-up. Don't try to persuade her to be your rebound relationship. That really WILL be a big mistake.
The reason friends and family are telling you it is not a good ide... (read in full...)
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