| Latest articles: How to avoid being used financially
This question has 13 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
30 October 2010: I have tried to keep my relationship problems away from this site as I do not want my advice to be assosiated to my own questions. However I have now learned an important lesson that I want to share with the rest of you, in the hopes that you will ...
What I've learned from my family.
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
14 June 2010: In order for aunts and question askers to see who they are getting advice from, I will continue to write some more about me, and where I come from. The things that I draw on when giving advice, what type of experience I have in life. This arti...
How one person changed my life
This question has 12 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
8 June 2010: I've been an aunt on this site now for quite a while, at first I started as an anonymous, until I finally took the step to make an account and dare to be identified somewhat. As I've gotten to know a few people on here, albeit still strangers ...
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I broke her heart with the high school thing. How do I tell her that I did so bad they took me off of aid? There's no easy way to tell her and I've held off for months.
Q. Hello everyone, My relationship with my mother has always been strained. We never do the traditional hug/kiss/I love you mom! thing. I just never understood it, however, I do understand that she cares for me and wants the best for me. I want to ma...
A. 21 April 2013: Also, have you considered part time studying? Taking fewer classes in the semester? I didn't take 100% studies, I took around two out of three classes each semester until my final year of my bachelors. I did this because I was working on the side, ... (read in full...)
I broke her heart with the high school thing. How do I tell her that I did so bad they took me off of aid? There's no easy way to tell her and I've held off for months.
Q. Hello everyone, My relationship with my mother has always been strained. We never do the traditional hug/kiss/I love you mom! thing. I just never understood it, however, I do understand that she cares for me and wants the best for me. I want to ma...
A. 21 April 2013: Does your mom know you take up loans? You NEED to tell her. It is ridiculous that you should take up loans like that, when still living at home. If you were to live on your own you would surely get some form of government support, would you now? ... (read in full...)
I want this to be more than just "One Night Stand". What should I do guys to make this work?
Q. Dear All So here it goes, I have a colleague at my work place that I truly am attracted to him and wouldn't mind being in a relationship with him. He lately been flirting with me sexually, his been touching my waist when he has the ...
A. 21 April 2013: You want more than a one night stand? Okay, here's what to do, just have sex with him! Don't try to stick it out and wait, if you just give him sex he will be so happy and will love you and you will be together!
Sounds so easy, right? If only tha... (read in full...)
Should I give up everything, and move interstate to be with my boyfriend? It would mean giving up my own home, which I purchased before I met him.
Q. I have been with my BF for 4 years. We are each in our late 20's/early 30s. I have my own house. He still lives at home. He was studying which is why he stayed there, but he could have moved out by now! (has it too good!). A big concern for me ...
A. 21 April 2013: This isn't the man for you. Yes, you've been together 4 years, but you're not going good and strong. After 4 years you now see major obstacles and difficulties, and the future is stacked full with problems and more problems. If this was a good ... (read in full...)
Did my panicking ruin my relationship for good?
Q. Hi! My boyfriend and I broke up after two and a half years together at the end of January because of my over the top overreacting and how I handle things sometimes. It started out as a break but I panicked and it turned into a break up. I kept...
A. 20 April 2013: You need to speak to your doctor about this frantic panicking, it isn't normal, and it is ruining your relationships. Yes, your panicking and excessive calling caused this to happen. You need to deal with your problem, not make excuses for it. NO ... (read in full...)
A 22 year old marriage over due to my disabilies?
Q. Please help, Iam a 45 year old man , I have had type1 diabetes since age 3 this plays a huge part in what I need advice with , I have been married to the same super beautiful wife for 22+years . I met my wife when I was 22 and she was 17 at the time...
A. 19 April 2013: You are imagining things.. She wasn't grabbing at your penis "as if something was missing". How does that work exactly? I didn't know it was possible to grab so specifically as to have it added extra meaning...
And then you bring up an ex boyfr... (read in full...)
Sexually charged BF after a fight?
Q. hello, After my boyfriend and I have an argument and sort things out, he tends to ask for a lot of sexual attention. why does he do this? Thank you....
A. 19 April 2013: To patch things up and feel close again. ... (read in full...)
Is her attitude about marriage something I should worry about now?
Q. This is a simple question, but it might have a complex answer... My girlfriend and I have been dating 2 years. Recently, we were talking casually about marriage. Not about us getting married, just the topic in general. She said "You know, ...
A. 18 April 2013: She's too young to be married, that's what's going on here. When her friends get married at 25-30 she'll probably want marriage as well. Or maybe not. The question is rather, are you willing to wait and see, and in that case: how long are you ... (read in full...)
He still thinks I'm a virgin, but I had a horrible experience losing it?
Q. So this guy and I were dating and then he just fell off the face of the earth for a month. He was just so busy etc. So I moved on and met someone new. I met this great guy in the beginning of the month. Things were perfect. So one night this guy and ...
A. 18 April 2013: Well, that is what happens when you "fool around". Stuff happens, people get excited, and how was he to know you didn't want it when you were fooling around with him like that. Did he even know you were a virgin? I think he tricked you to have sex ... (read in full...)
Experimenting SEX, and I am Virgin
Q. Okay, I'm 13 and I'm a girl and my girlfriend is 15 she tells me she wants me to get a toung ring so I can eat her out . But were BOTH virgins nd I feel that I should finger her first befor I eat her out but I don't know how to tell her or know if ...
A. 18 April 2013: You just need to talk to her. Tell her how you feel. You can't be in a relationship if you aren't going to speak your mind. It is so easy that the one partner stays silent and is unhappy, while the other takes control and "rules" the relationship. ... (read in full...)
How do you handle being around someone who doesn't like you?
Q. This isn't really a relationship question but what I would like to talk about is how to deal with being around someone who doesn't like you/you don't like them. I usually get along with people and when I find out that someone doesn't like me it re...
A. 18 April 2013: If she treats you badly and is rude to you, then why are you hanging out with her so much? If she is friends with your good friends, can not your "good friends" tell her to respect you? I understand that they don't want to get mixed into drama, but ... (read in full...)
Could anyone help? I'd like to hold a conference for anti bullying!
Q. I want to hold an antibulling conference but don't know where to have it or when!!! I need help with getting every thing set up. So if anyone has a suggestion please tell me....
A. 18 April 2013: I think it is good to try and do something! And you will help others when you take a stance. How about contacting the local newspaper and tell them of your plans? Then people who want to help can contact you.... (read in full...)
I learned my lesson, take your own car ladies! Don't depend on a guy to take you home from a party!
Q. So I went to a party with my boyfriend.... He was eyeballing a girl right in front of me. So I got upset. But I didn't say anything and held it in. I got over it by going into the bathroom and telling myself that I'm pretty too. People started ge...
A. 17 April 2013: I think you need to break up and find a man who keeps his word.... (read in full...)
Am I fooling myself into thinking we could get together again?
Q. Hi, here is my situation: One night i got drunk and kissed a guy. I told my boyfriend the morning after and he broke up with me. That same day we broke up i got depressed and slept with the guy. A week after my boyfriend and i got back together. 2 ...
A. 16 April 2013: Urgh, well this is complicated. I think the best thing to do now is give him space and leave him alone. Perhaps things can work out between you, but not right now. You and him both need time to get over the hurt and pain. He's feeling betrayed, and ... (read in full...)
Can't stop wearing colored contact lenses
Q. I started wearing colored contact lenses when I was 17, I haven't been able to stop 5 years later. It's become a crazy addiction and I can't stop wearing them. I wear them everyday I can't go anywhere without them. I am not an ugly girl (not being ...
A. 16 April 2013: This isn't a big problem. People wont really care, or die, or abandon you, if they find out what your real eye colour is. Really. People don't really care that much. Most people don't stare into your eyes for long enough to even remember your eye ... (read in full...)
Can I kiss a girl on the first date?
Q. Hi...First I really want to tell u who i love this website I really like it...It's really cool Isn't it? lol...Okay! I'm going this Saturday on a date with a girl...It will be the first And I want to know if I can kiss this girl during the first da...
A. 16 April 2013: I don't think you should kiss her on the first date unless that is what she wants.
If she wants you to kiss her you will know. She will stand close to you, look at you, look at your lips and into your eyes. She will not speak, just stand close an... (read in full...)
B/f lied to me and said he wasn't a virgin when he was. Will he want to date others since I'm his first?
Q. Hi everyone and thanks in advance for your responses. I have a boyfriend whom I dearly love and I believe he feels the same way. We have been together for almost 3 years and we often discuss a future together - marriage, kids, where to live et...
A. 16 April 2013: I do think it was wrong of him to lie, but this sounds more like a one time thing. He had good reasons to lie. You wouldn't have cared if he was inexperienced, but to him it mattered a lot. It made him embarrassed and nervous and probably ashamed of ... (read in full...)
Could anyone help? I'd like to hold a conference for anti bullying!
Q. I want to hold an antibulling conference but don't know where to have it or when!!! I need help with getting every thing set up. So if anyone has a suggestion please tell me....
A. 16 April 2013: Get your parents involved and get your school involved. Try to think of a plan of how you want this conference to be. Will people hold speeches, how many people will come, what should go on at the conference, and then investigate possible arenas. ... (read in full...)
GF brother is becoming a problem in our relationship
Q. Me and my girlfriend have been dating for about six months now. Everything is great we have plans on having kids and getting married in the near future except I dont like her brother. He's 2 years younger than her. He doesn't have a job but goes to ...
A. 16 April 2013: Talk to your girlfriend about this, in a serious and in-depth conversation. Tell her you need to talk about your future, and sit down one evening to discuss this matter of house and moving in/the issue of her brother.
Talk it out. Figure it out. ... (read in full...)
Are there danger signs in this relationship or am I just insecure?
Q. I have a boyfriend I love very much. He understands me more than anyone I've ever met and loves me for who I am, even my bad qualities. I care about him so much and can't keep him off my mind, which is something I definitely never thought I'd ever ...
A. 16 April 2013: Yes, problem! The money! You need to STOP paying for him. Seriously. This needs to end. What he is doing is mooching off of you and using you financially. He HAS money, he just chooses to spend it on other things. If you decided to do the ... (read in full...)
My bridesmaid bought a shoe a size too big. I'm worried about how she's going to wear it for a couple of hours???
Q. I'm getting married in May. I'm having a bit of an issue. I told my bridesmaids they could pick out whatever shoe they wanted. One of my bridesmaids bought a shoe that is a size too big. I know you can stuff a shoe to make it fit correctly. However ...
A. 16 April 2013: I think that this is her problem, not yours. She knows her shoe size one would think. If she has a problem walking in them, then that's her problem. If her feet start to hurt after 5 hours, still her problem. She chose to get those shoes.
You'r... (read in full...)
Is it possible to have a relationship without having sex?
Q. I'm a 24 year old guy. I met this girl, who's a couple of years younger than me, about a year ago. She's verbally impaired (mute, I don't like to call her by this name). We have been very good friends. I don't mind her disability at all. She's ve...
A. 16 April 2013: You did tell her you don't want sex, right? How did she respond? Yes, you might lose her. Even if she accepts the no sex, when people become a couple the dynamics change. Things might not work out for other reasons than the non-sex thing.
So, e... (read in full...)
No Sex till after marriage this is my value
Q. I'm at university and I've decided I don't want to have sex before marriage, as I don't want to sleep with someone who isn't fully committed to me. I feel very strongly about this and I don't think I'd like to change it. I'm definitely not asexual ...
A. 16 April 2013: As for the sexual compatibility, don't worry about it. It's not necessary to have intercourse to know if you're sexually compatible. Sexual compatibility shows in several other ways, and as most of us women know.. our brains are our erogenous zone. ... (read in full...)
No Sex till after marriage this is my value
Q. I'm at university and I've decided I don't want to have sex before marriage, as I don't want to sleep with someone who isn't fully committed to me. I feel very strongly about this and I don't think I'd like to change it. I'm definitely not asexual ...
A. 16 April 2013: You're not limited to dating only a few Christian guys (although if you search for them you will see they're quite many, not so few). However, not all non-religious guys will accept waiting when they aren't of the same opinion as you when it comes ... (read in full...)
Orgasm question
Q. Do you think there is such a thing as an orgasm that *requires* BOTH gspot and clitoris stimulation?? I ask because I've heard of females having either a clitoris orgasm or a vaginal orgasm. I've tried having just a vaginal orgasm or just a...
A. 16 April 2013: Such follow-ups makes me wonder why I even bothered answering. To think I wasted my time trying to give an answer when this is the thanks... ... (read in full...)
His friends are rude to me and know too much of my personal business
Q. How would you deal with your boyfriends friends being rude to you? I've found that I'm not really comfortable at all around my boyfriends 5 main best friends. They all make very rude comments to me and even just make rude comments about our relation...
A. 15 April 2013: I want to tell you one more thing. I had a boyfriend once, and he said similar things to me. He told me his sister didn't like me. He told me I had embarrassed him in front of his family, and hinted that it was his family who thought I didn't ... (read in full...)
Confused: why did she start acting weird after I told her I am the same age as her and not younger?
Q. Hello Cupid well, I am in an awkward situation. I met a girl the other day at a cafeteria and as she was passing by, I stopped her and exchanged greetings so I could ask a bit about the place. The conversation went on and I asked her to sit with ...
A. 15 April 2013: Her messages are weird. It's not like you need time to figure this out, talking and meeting people isn't a mystery.
Anyways. If you want to be friends with her just tell her you weren't making a pass at her for romance, and just thought she was ... (read in full...)
We're great together but I'm frustrated by his lack of maturity
Q. Hey guys! So me and my bf has been together for almost 2 years now and we have an amazing relationship. Hes only a year younger than me but i feel like he has so much growing up to do and it literally drives me crazy! My biggest mistake was taking ...
A. 15 April 2013: Stop acting like his mommy then.. He only comes to you to ask these questions because you keep answering them. Stop telling him what hw it is (do you mean hour?) and when things are due don't tell him. Let him find out for himself. LET him grow up. ... (read in full...)
His friends are rude to me and know too much of my personal business
Q. How would you deal with your boyfriends friends being rude to you? I've found that I'm not really comfortable at all around my boyfriends 5 main best friends. They all make very rude comments to me and even just make rude comments about our relation...
A. 15 April 2013: Have a stern chat with your boyfriend. He needs to learn the word "privacy" and stop gossiping to his friends. He also seems to need to learn when to shut up. Why did he go tell you his female friend told him to break up with you? What was the ... (read in full...)
I like a girl who seems more affluent than me?
Q. There's a girl I really like. I met her working with her last summer at a summer job. She seems pretty nice and sweet and thinks I'm every bit as such and we chat on Facebook every once in a while (not frequently), we get along fine and she's ...
A. 15 April 2013: Social class doesn't get in the way unless you let it. If YOU are bothered by it then you've let it get in the way. It is quite common for at least women to date men with more wealth, and it isn't a problem then. The only way it'd be a problem the ... (read in full...)
Confused: why did she start acting weird after I told her I am the same age as her and not younger?
Q. Hello Cupid well, I am in an awkward situation. I met a girl the other day at a cafeteria and as she was passing by, I stopped her and exchanged greetings so I could ask a bit about the place. The conversation went on and I asked her to sit with ...
A. 15 April 2013: If you are confused, why did you tell her you understood?
My thought is the same as Cindy, actually. I thought so before reading her answer, so I think it must be correct. She never had an intention of dating you, and thinking you were younger ... (read in full...)
How important is it to date your type (physical preference)?
Q. How important is it to date someone your type? I've always liked guys with softer features and slender eyes, seemingly shy but with a bright smile. My first ex was exactly that and I've never been more attracted to anyone else. He was cute more...
A. 15 April 2013: I don't believe everyone has a type, at least not purely physically. I have a personality type that I tend to go for and am attracted to. But I think you do too, just just haven't given it too much thought because for now you're focused on the ... (read in full...)
Girls: Do you say no sex to your boyfriend often?
Q. Hi Just like to know if this is normal behaviour for men or in relationships. Last night in bed with my boyfriend I wasn't feeling too well (have a bad headcold) and told him I didn't want to have sex with him, to just cuddle and sleep. He kep...
A. 15 April 2013: NOT normal! He tried to rape you! I'm serious, you should get out of this relationship, this man sounds dangerous. He held you down BY FORCE and forced your legs apart. Listen to yourself, read what you wrote! He used FORCE on you, to hold you down ... (read in full...)
I'm getting frustrated with my boyfriend's girl friend but I do like her. What should I do?
Q. Argh this is a horrible question and I've been debating with myself on whether to post on it for ages now but it's just got to the point where I can feel it getting on top of me and I need someone to talk some sense to me! Basically, my ...
A. 14 April 2013: It's not about the girl.
This is about you not wanting your boyfriend to sit and text someone else for half an hour when you're right next to him, and when the two of you have little time to spend together. I don't know often you do get to spend... (read in full...)
I love my boyfriend but don't want a sexless passionless relationship
Q. I've been dating my boyfriend for almost a year and I love him very much, but I'm not happy with our sex life. When we first started dating he was really hot for me and couldn't get enough of me, but it has tapered off drastically. We have sex maybe ...
A. 14 April 2013: You said yourself, it wont change. It changes maybe for a short period, and then it goes back to the way it was. So talking about it doesn't help.
And you don't want to settle for this, you're frustrated, and left unsatisfied. And who can blam... (read in full...)
I am his first girlfriend and he isn't sure that I am the one. Should I let him go?
Q. I'm really confused right now. My boyfriend and I have been going out together for 6 months. He's 31 and i am his first gf. So he has nothing to compare to when something doesn't feel right in the relationship. He told me he had this feeling that he ...
A. 14 April 2013: Let him go. If he is yours he will come back, and then stay for good. Uf you love him, let him go.... (read in full...)
First time sex and a big member.
Q. My boyfriend has an abnormally big dick and it is physically too big for me? -I've sat on it lubed up and it would take alot of force to make it go in, were both still virgins but feel ready, how do i go about making this as less painful as possible...
A. 14 April 2013: Maybe wait a few years and practice doing other things sexually. When you're dealing with a big member you need to take things sloooow and not jump straight for intercourse. You might want to warm up by getting used to fingering first, then maybe ... (read in full...)
He's still with his girlfriend, so why is he still seeing me? Does he like me?
Q. I was seeing a guy about 3 years ago and we never broke it off In bad terms we just fell apart .. So he ended up with someone and i was really happy for him so last year i messaged him and we spoke about the past and he asked if he could come ove...
A. 14 April 2013: No, he doesn't like you. In fact he cares very little for you, and is just using you for sex. It is quite obvious.
Look, you need to open your eyes if you aren't already seeing this for what it is. If you care about him and have feelings for him ... (read in full...)
Married for nearly nine years, together with my wife for eleven and a half years and I've fallen for a 20 yr old girl
Q. Hi, I have been married for nearly nine years and together with my wife for eleven and half years. Recently the marriage has been going through a lull and I fell for a 20 yr old girl. We get on really well and cant stop wanting to be together...
A. 14 April 2013: So she strokes your ego. Well you're still married.
Always end one relationship before you start another. That means, determine what you want to do with your relationship before you start thinking about this 20-year old little miss somethin... (read in full...)
Why do girls like guys with attitude? Why can't they admit they don't like swet guys?
Q. I’m in a relationship with my current girlfriend for the last 14 months. Before that, I was in relationship twice : for two years and one year respectively and I was dumped because I was too sweet and loveable boyfriend. Before entered into...
A. 14 April 2013: You were in one relationship for a year, then another for two years... and you were true to yourself in those, but there was a mismatch and you broke up. p /
p /
Now you've been together just over a year, and you think this somehow proves anything... (read in full...)
Orgasm question
Q. Do you think there is such a thing as an orgasm that *requires* BOTH gspot and clitoris stimulation?? I ask because I've heard of females having either a clitoris orgasm or a vaginal orgasm. I've tried having just a vaginal orgasm or just a...
A. 13 April 2013: " Is it possible for a female to absolutely require both in order to orgasm" Apparently, as that is what works for you. Really, I don't see a need to classify this. If that's what works for you, then great. If you suddenly figure out that you... (read in full...)
Does sex really matter?
Q. I have a brilliant boyfriend, he really is amazing. We have been together over a year and have lived together most of that time (we met in student accomondation.)We are both twenty and lost our virginities to each other, and I can't imagine a more ...
A. 13 April 2013: Sex matters. You'll get very tired with this after a few years. For now you still have the patience and the, perhaps naive, belief that "love will conquer all". And so you think sex wont matter as long as everything else is fine.
But it does mat... (read in full...)
| *higirl's friends
These are mutual friends, so *higirl has
added them and they have added *higirl!
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![kitty-cat=] agony aunt](/avatars/4e276644-588c-43d2-bf37-fe35b92660b5.png){kind=small}
