New here? Register in under one minute   Already a member? Login237593 questions, 1045958 answers  

  DearCupid.ORG relationship advice
  Got a relationship, dating, love or sex question? Ask for help!Search
 New Questions Answers . Most Discussed Viewed . Unanswered . Followups . Forums . Top agony aunts . About Us .  Articles  . Sitemap

What goes through a man's head when he sees his wife having sex with another man?

Tagged as: Cheating, Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (17 June 2017) 13 Answers - (Newest, 24 June 2017)
A female United States age 51-59, *em51 writes:

To make it short my husband and I are into guys joining us for sex . But husband has always joined for sex until recently when at a party when a black guy paid attention to me more than normal. So at husbands request I invited him home for a threesum.

But to my surprise husband did not join but only watched as. I took my 1st interracial sex.

My question is guys what goes threw a mans head as his wife gets sex from a man that's not her husband?

View related questions: sex with another

<-- Rate this Question

Reply to this Question


Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question!

A male reader, Denizen United Kingdom + , writes (24 June 2017):

Denizen agony auntSo OP, to return to my original answer, 'Why don't you ask him'?

<-- Rate this answer

A female reader, Fem51 United States +, writes (24 June 2017):

Fem51 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Fem51 agony aunt1st I love my man we are swimming in love for each other and be honest I enjoy other men as much as I enjoy him with other women

<-- Rate this answer


A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland + , writes (23 June 2017):

aunt honesty agony auntMy partner would never want to see me having sex with another man, in his opinion I am his partner and not to be shared, so am afraid I cannot help you on this one, for me personally I would never get over seeing my partner with another woman. I suggest asking your husband why he doesn't mind sharing you.

<-- Rate this answer


A male reader, judgedick France + , writes (19 June 2017):

i agree with the people that said talk to him and ask him , you don't say if he has sex while you watched him , or if he has sex with the other men , soi can't say if it was the way that he just did not want to have sex with him , he mght be anty black , it could be that he was so happy to see you enjoy yourself , he might have tried this way of lifestyle and now fed up of it , people are all different there is so many kinks we are all kinky in our own way if others had to judge ,

talk to him if you are joining other people for sex you must have talked in the past so don't stop now

<-- Rate this answer


A female reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2017):

He is thinking how lucky he is to have found such a woman who would lower herself to become a sex toy and sexual amusement for her husband.

Women like you are rare. And to be quite honest, so are men like him.

A man who loves and respects his wife would never ask her to f*ck other men nor want to watch. That would destroy a man if he loved you.

Clearly, you don't love him either because if you did, you could not stomach the idea of any other man laying a hand on you. And it would hurt you to have your husband watch such cruelty.

<-- Rate this answer


A male reader, Garbo United States + , writes (18 June 2017):

Garbo agony auntTo someone who finds such sex despicable, it is not up to me nor is it possible to guess what your husband thinks. You should ask him

<-- Rate this answer


A female reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2017):

Its not a question aimed at women is it?

But here is an answer for you.

It seems that you need a lot of attention in life and Im guessing you are most likely a person whose head shrieks "notice me!"

Now this undoubtably attracted hubby to you and maybe this attracted the attention of the other guy at this swingers party!

When you went to the party the intention was to hook up with someone/anyone.

Its something you have both agreed upon prior to attending and one or both of you sought this group out solely for sexual encounters!

I wont comment on where your love life was as a couple or where your sex life was but it stands to reason you felt you needed to liven things up a bit and this was your solution!

In order to absorb yourself into this sexual set up you had to stop seeing people in a heartical and spiritual way!

So interracial is irrelevant because you act on a stage that has no emotional content but merely mechanical action!

As this is a regular feature of your life then I expect it was no different for hubby than seeing you drinking water from a different tap which is a truelly unremarkable event.

You will probably carry on hyping yourself up and nesting under the wings of the word "husband" until you realise that the world is not bothered and one or the other is not bothered.

Meanwhile you might as well keep a diary of who shagged who so that you can sell it if you ever hit hard times financially!

<-- Rate this answer


A male reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (17 June 2017):

olderthandirt agony auntThat is insane! no one I know would ever want to see his wife have sex with another person. You are in a sick relationship. Another great question is what goes on in a wife's head that wants to "perform" in front of her husband? Why don't you both go to a shrink and get some help?

<-- Rate this answer


A female reader, mystiquek United States + , writes (17 June 2017):

mystiquek agony auntI agree with the gents that have answered. Any man will have his own opinion, but isn't it your husband's thoughts that you really want to know? Why don't you ask him how he felt/feels?

<-- Rate this answer


A male reader, WiseOwlE United States + , writes (17 June 2017):

Why don't you ask your husband what's going through HIS head?

<-- Rate this answer


A male reader, Billy Bathgate United States + , writes (17 June 2017):

The idea is so foreign to me that I have no idea. I would suggest you ask him.

<-- Rate this answer


A female reader, Andie's Thoughts United Kingdom + , writes (17 June 2017):

Andie's Thoughts agony auntAsk. Bear in mind the following:

What gets you off on having sex with other men?

What gets you off having your husband watch?

Would you allow him to have sex with a woman with and without you joining in?

This is a question only he can answer. Ask him.

<-- Rate this answer


A male reader, Denizen United Kingdom + , writes (17 June 2017):

Denizen agony auntYou are in a marriage where you and your husband are freely coupling with others. As you have reached this stage of trust, why oh why can you not ask your husband this question?

<-- Rate this answer


Add your answer to the question "What goes through a man's head when he sees his wife having sex with another man?"

Because you are not logged in yet, your answer will be posted anonymously.

Already have an account? Login first
Don't have an account? Register in under one minute and get your own agony aunt column - recommended!

To stop automated spammers using our form please write human in this box (create an account and this step is not needed):

- type "human" here

Please select your sex:  

All Content Copyright (C) DearCupid.ORG 2004-2008 - we actively monitor for copyright theft