A
male
age
30-35,
*arecooldude
writes:I am stuck and confused.Should I leave my long distance girlfriend of 7 months?So here my story goes..I like and love this girl a lot, as we were classmates earlier for a year then she took admission somewhere and me somewhere else.We both are miles away from.each other but like each other's company a lot. So we became a long distance relationship 7 months ago.We used to meet very very rare means in 2 months just meeting for a hour or too was really a big deal for us..!!So here my problem goes..She told me, she used to have a male best friend from another town, lets name him A.She told me some lies about him after I came to know they had future planned and she had said the same words to him as she had told me about our marriage and all..So here comes boy 2 whom she was in relationship for a day(as told by her)She said he was vulgar so she left him..but later i came to know they both have kissed..!! And furthur I dont know what might had happened..(when we came in relationship talked about sex with me within 1-2 days just but I am a reserved type of guy I dont like opening so soon, but she told me she broke up with guy 2 in a day because he talked about sex with her..I dont know what to think, she lied me simply!!)Guy no. 3, she never admitted she was in relationship.with him but said they hugged and all..(once she told me they were in relationship for 15 days and a month after she tells me we were not in a relationship, such a liar) I know she might have done everything with him..Guy no. 4, he was 7 years older in age from her and she had discussed sex positions with him..Guy no. 5, his cousin(male) made her read sex stories and they used to talk.bed stuff..and she lived with her for a year in his home(for study purpose) but I doubt they might be too close..Guy no. 5, she liked him, he was in our class, my classmate too..So she told me guy 1,2,3,5 use to love her but she does'nt love them..but when came to knew from someone else that she loved them but they refused her..I also want to tell she has lots of male friends compared to female ones and she opens up.with them freely..As its India, so its not a good act hereShe was close to many guys and I dont feel goodI am a simple guy, no bad past but I think she dont loves me, she is just after my parental money and because my parents are very respected in the town..!!In many small topics she lies me simply straight away..I dont say any thing to her because she just go mad at small things!!Means she always use to scold me, humilate me, emotinal attacks, cold shoulder..She just simply made me cry always then also I apologise to her wheather its my fault or not..!!One day I simply asked her, If I had no money, I am nothing great so will you with me forever then also?She got hyper, said yes i will but said angrily that I mean to say that she is after my money and all that stuff..She made me cry multiple times.that day..she has also said that relationship is over, so simply!!But then she said she is sorry we are in relationship after I cried a lot..and apologised for my fault..!!Because of her my studies are affecting a lot..One more thing, she told guy 1 that they will have kid after 3 years till then they will enjoy and all(she told me they were simply friends..huh)So the same words she told me also when we use to discuss on that topic..!!I want to get rid of all this, I want to leave her but I am unable I am attached a lot to her, I love her, she is really beautiful..I dont want to be alone, I think if I will leave her, she will be with some one else romancing and I picture it in my mind and I feel lost, broken!!I dont know what to do..please help
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best friend, broke up, cousin, liar, long distance, money, she lies Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, sugarplum786  +, writes (15 November 2013):
 Hi, she is not into you, you are probably a fall back plan or a comfort for her. This is not said to hurt you, but you are wasting your time with this woman and she appears to be easily taken with men that give her attention.
Before she breaks your heart, walk away and find someone that can be true. If you continue to listen to her lies and try to make things work, rest assured that's the way life will be with her.
You deserve better and someone that is true to her feelings and you.
A
female
reader, Aunty Babbit  +, writes (14 November 2013):
 You say you don't want to be alone but in reality you are.
This is a long distance relationship that does not appear to be going anywhere.
You have trust issues with this girl that might be considered understandable based on what you've written but may also be viewed in that she's only being honest about her past and it could be argued that what's happened in the past shouldn't really matter, it's how she's behaving NOW that does.
That said, she sounds like quite a "forward" young lady and I would imagine she might need a real boyfriend, in short, one who's actually there to hold her not on the other side of the computer screen.
I don't know where this young lady is from but you also need to consider that in your culture her behaviour may not be considered appropriate or attractive whereas in other countries it's perfectly acceptable.
You must decide what YOU can cope with and accept, she shouldn't have to change who she is to fit in with your image of the perfect girlfriend.
You say you're in love with her and that she's beautiful but you're not happy and you don't trust her.
Of course it would be hard imagining her with other guys, so don't.
I think that maybe you two would work better as friends.
I also think you should spend less time on line and more time out in the real world, with real friends, meeting real women who can have a real relationship with.
I hope this helps AB x
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