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Is my Bf telling me about a crush he once had on a pretty girl, only to make me jealous?

Tagged as: Crushes, Dating, Friends, Teenage, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (30 April 2015) 2 Answers - (Newest, 30 April 2015)
A female United States age 18-21, anonymous writes:

my bf recently told me about a childhood crush of his and how pretty she is and how beautiful her smile is.I m feeling insecure becausezp if she loves him too he might leave me.

At times i feel my bf really loves me and is doing this just to make me jealous! because i have a lot of guy friends and he might be jealous of them too!

i love him a lot n i dont want to lose him!

i dont know what to do because my insecurity is hurting this relationship and im finding it hard to trust him!

View related questions: crush, insecure, jealous

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A male reader, Sageoldguy1465 United States +, writes (30 April 2015):

Sageoldguy1465 agony auntWhen people are as young as you are (18-21, no?).... jealousy is ubiquitous.... much like ketchup on a fast-food hamburger.

In-question is only your "guy's" talking about this OTHER girl, of whom he was fond...... YOU need to ASK him if he is still carrying a torch for her.... and - thereby - you should give him time and space to pursue her..... OR... is he smitten with YOU (and ONLY you!), such that he wants you and him to be "an item"..... If the answer to that last is "yes," then tell him to forget about telling you about his gorgeous past-crush, and spend his time makiing you feel good about what is going on between the two of you...

Good luck...

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A male reader, lawncare United Kingdom +, writes (30 April 2015):

lawncare agony auntIt sounds like a slight mis-step on your boyfriend's account. But without knowing the full context (is this person around? Are they in touch? Is she single?) I would perhaps say that you're overreacting.

Perhaps he was trying to share a part of his history. History, as you will learn as you get older, is something that we all have and that shapes us all. You too will have a history and you will not think kindly if somebody comes along and suggests that some part of it is not to their liking.

Now, if he was comparing you unflatteringly to this person, then you do have grounds for some kind of beef. But you say you love him, you say you don't want to lose him and you say yourself that you are insecure. Monitor the situation by all means (not obsessively, just naturally) but my advice is calm down, treasure what you have and be kinder to yourself.

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