A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:I think my mum is having an affair.About 5 or 6 years ago, whilst taking my younger brother to school, my mum met this man whose son was in the class as my brother.They got talking, and my mum was having problems with her computers, this man agreed to help. And really it went from there.Five or six years on, and they're best friends. He still often comes round to fix our computers, but often comes to watch movies and have dinner with my mum.My dad works away alot, and it probably only home about 2 or 3 days a week. I've always suspected them of having an affair, on msn they send winks to each other, of like kisses and stuff. And the other day, when I come into the room, where they were both watching a film, my mum was on the phone to my dad, but the man had his knees between my mums, and they looked like a real couple. When My mum noticed I was there, she quickly left the room. And often, the man will say that my mum will make him pay. Often with a smile on his face, like the remark is sexual. To add to this, the man recently split up from his wife, and she's quickly found a new boyfriend, with whom she wants to get married to.Please help. I really don't want to falsely accuse my mum or the man, but I want to know the truth.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, soulcal +, writes (1 July 2008):
 to be honest it does sound like they love each other but maybe your mum feels lonely at times and wants somebody to be there for her as you said your dad is away quite alot of the time.
if you are worried talk to your mum about it privatly and say you are worried and are thinking of your dads feelings if he found out
i hope this helps xx
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2008): As hard as it may seem, I think the best thing that you can do is stay out of this. The friendship may be innocent, and it may be not-so-innocent, but you cannot afford to get dragged into this. What do you do if you confront your mum and she says "yes, I am having an affair with him, and I'm sorry, but you mustn't tell your dad"? That puts you in a terrible, terrible position! Mind you, your position is pretty bad already, isn't it? I know not knowing the truth is hurting you, but I do think that you should stay out of whatever is going on and leave any game playing that is going on to the adults.
See if you can find a third party that you can talk to face to face, like a youth counsellor or a teen advisor and see what advice they give you. If nothing else, they'll give you a real outlet for your feelings and some real coping strategies. Whatever you tell them will be in confidence and they won't tell anyone else.
Take care and hugs to you x
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