A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Now that I've been with a few guys I realize how small guy's d*cks are. Like when he's pushing it in, it can kind of feel big but once you get used to it, it's just not a big deal.And long and short lengths don't make a difference. The girths are usually the same, so they all feel the same really.D*cks R seriously just....*small*. Like even in porn, I started to really pay attention and like 90% of the guy's dicks in there are small and skinny.Honestly, I feel semi disappointed when I have sex now. All this build up, and these guy's dicks aren't even bigger than my toys...or even like 2 of their own fingers. Hell, fingers can actually feel even better than f*cking. Why are dicks so idolized in the media and by dudes, when they don't even take up much space or whatever? I seriously don't get it, now that I've had sex it's just seems funny. Anyone share my pov? This site seems to have a lot of sex questions
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female
reader, YouWish +, writes (23 April 2016):
 Coming in late to this question, and after reading the answers, Honeypie hit the answer in her 5th paragraph.
Guys are going to get pissed off by your question, because to them, a penis is the measure of their manhood. But if they suddenly woke up and their penis ceased to be the bringer of their orgasmic pleasure, it would become just another appendage used for peeing.
You're a victim of porn and movies. LIKE Honeypie said, it's rare that a woman can orgasm through penetrative sex. That's like limiting a guy's ability to orgasm to touching his scrotum only and expecting him to get all the way there by ONLY touching that alone.
It's not about the penis. It's about YOUR clitoris! It's also about thousands of years of horrible male-generated (Like Freud) education that clitoral stimulation is inferior to intercourse. WRONG. The "G" spot is nothing more than stimulating the clitoral nerve system from within the vagina, hence the "come hither" motions only about an inch in.
This is precisely why a guy should give a girl her complete orgasmic release BEFORE EVER ENTERING her. If she's capable of multiples, then even better.
Never again consider porn to be the least bit educational about actual sex, and every time a guy watches it to gain moves to take to actual sex, I think he kills a magical unicorn or something.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 April 2016): You know, even a Airbus A380 looks small when you are flying it into the Grand Canyon.
In all seriousness though... penises larger that 5 or 6 inches are a rarity. Guys who do have larger wangs make the money in porn because porn is a visual medium and large is just easier to film the weird-ass positions porn likes to do that, offer no actual pleasure in reality.
Seems to me... you are expecting the man to do all the work and then give nothing in return.
And it's called foreplay, kiddo.
So go and learn to be good at sex before you go getting all high and mighty.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 April 2016): Penis is just penis. What exactly are you expecting to get? Its a body organ not a magic wand. If every dick is disappointing you maybe your expectations are too high or at least a bit unrealistic?
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (21 April 2016):
 Just out of sheer curiosity and without any polemical intention : but , how large exactly do you reckon a dick should be for being of your liking ?...
You know, it makes sense that dicks " do not take up much space " - if men sported an appendage the size of a baseball bat between their legs , they would have trouble walking. I guess nature has arranged things so that the size of the male organ is just right for them to be able both to mate and to move around freely, and since a few eons this size has settled more or less around the average 6 inches ( or just a tad less to be precise ) . You can be sure that if it had turned out that the current size is insufficient or ineffective , evolution would have taken care of that and penises would be bigger by now.
Anyway, it sounds like you are disappointed and unimpressed with your sex life, - quite possible- but you blame that , more than on a great variety of other possible factors, - selfish lovers, poor technique, fear of pregnancy, your inexperience or misinformation, mental blocks due to your ubringing or a poor self image etc.etc.,- on the sheer size, or lack of size, actually, of your partners.
Well, who tells you that if you met bigger dicks sex would be better ? Why couldn't it be still disappointing ?....
Sex has got to feel GOOD, not big. Length is a rather irrelevant dimension, since the only part of the vagina which contains nerve endings is the outer third,- girth, as you have noticed yourself, may have got more to do with the physical sensation you perceive, but, again, we are talking about variations in the orders of millimeters, so, really, who's counting.
( Without mentioning the fact that so many women can only come from oral or manual stimulation; so , as far as they are concerned, the guy could be dickless and they would not care ).
If he is not doing it right, or if you are not in the mood for sex, or if the mutual chemistry is not there... the guy could be 20 inches and you would still say " yawn ".
A penis is not a magic wand, or Cinderella's crystal slipper, - you find the right size, and, voila, happily ever after ( at least in bed ). There are so many other variables at play which can prevent people from having a fulfilling sex life, particularly at your age, that blaming " skinny dicks " is most probably barking up the wrong tree.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 April 2016): Girls do just as much to continue the big dick focus as guys ever do.
Bottom line, guys with larger than average dicks do get laid more. The big dick focus will end as soon as that changes.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 April 2016): You are probably too young to know him, but the comedian Sam Kinison had an answer for you: penis too small? Fine! Anal sex it is! LOL
Maybe you are a size queen who hasn't found her ideal hugely hung guy yet? Or maybe you prefer women? Anyway, have fun, but don't insult guy's penises IRL. As some of the aunts said earlier, it can REALLY stay with a guy.
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (21 April 2016):
 Average is 6 inches. Maybe only guys who are confident about their sizes give their information while the ones who have smaller sizes won't bother. While 6 inches is enough for most women, some find them small.
If you feel the porn actresses are exaggerating their expressions, that could be true. Many men are insecure about their sizes, so watching women enjoying it in porn makes them feel better. They think if an average size penis can have such an impact, then they too, are able to bring women to ecstasy. So are many rom coms featuring mediocre guys getting all the hotties. It's a fantasy for them.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 April 2016): My wife certainly does.
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (20 April 2016):
 I don't think sex is overrated (you just haven't had any great sex yet, sweetie). I do agree that dicks are overrated, though. I guess they mean so much to men because they have such a close relationship with their dicks, but I guess you need to be a man to understand the special relationship between a man and his junk....!
But, I will take my guess as guys loving their dicks so much is because it gives them so much pleasure. They have an easy time reaching orgasm. It's enjoyable. So I would think it rather natural to then love the "tool" that brings you this great feeling.
Ad for your toys, toys are supposed to not be bigger than a real penis, that's the entire point! They're supposed to make do when a real penis isn't available, they're not made to be bigger or smaller (although you CAN of course find them in all sizes). The toys are made for the average woman, and the average woman has a vagina that is accustomed to an average penis. So there you go.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 April 2016): Honest to god yes they are overrated. Guys argue and obsess about length, but unless the woman is really long up there it's irrelevant. The most important thing I think is the girth/thickness. And yeah fingers are very awesome. But whether a dick is 5 or 7 inches, that doesn't matter because they both do feel the same.
So yeah most dicks are skinny and feel the same mostly lol I have no idea why guys take them seriously either.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (20 April 2016):
 This is not really a penis shaming site,so I'm not going to bite on that aspect of your question.
But let me give you a few free biology lessons here.
Penis size have very little to do with the ability to procreate. All the penis is, is a "meaty shaft" that helps get the seeds as close to the uterus and thus the eggs to fertilize them. An average vagina is 3-4 inches deep so not much is needed.
Of the primates humans actually have the largest penises. however, again, SIZE is not important to procreate.
If "good sex" was necessary to produce offspring, then our bodies would probably look slightly different. However, pleasure is actually not required. If you look at dogs (just an example) they are "stuck" together for a while after the male is done, and it causes pain to both male and female if you try and separate them physically, because the end of the male's penis swells up with blood AFTER ejaculation. Cats... have barbs on the penis to get the female to ovulate... Imagine that?! So in that sense, we got lucky.
As for sex... You are 18-21 so my guess is, you haven't REALLY had good sex. Actually it's not a guess, because you seem to assume that the size of a guy's penis is what makes a difference.. it really isn't. Just like riding a bike, carving a tombstone or painting a painting, SEX requires skills. At your age group, not many guy have that (nor do the girls).
And then let's get to the facts that 80% of women don't orgasm from penetration alone. Some don't at all. Which again suggest that the "point" of a penis is not about pleasure for the female.
Secondly, you judge porn stars penises? You do realize that porn is not reality? It's as fake as Dolly Parton's boobs, right? Whether his size is big or small the woman's job in the porn is to pretend being pleased and he is supposed to show his virility by drilling for oil in as many variations as possible. His size? irrelevant, specially if he can keep it up and fake convincingly enough.
Why is there so much emphasis on size? I think it goes back - WAY back to a point where people were more ignorant about the complexity of the human body. It was presumed that the bigger the penis the better chance of offspring (same with women and breasts and women and wide hips). Penises were seen as a sign of fertility, again, same as boobs and wide hips.
And then of course you have the whole notion of "magic" when it comes to a penis. When erect it grows! How about them apples?! A host of fertility rituals and rites in all cultures suggest that the phallus is not an image of the male ego, it is more a representation of earth's potency and life's capacity for pleasure, creativity and generativity. Today? It's more about the male ego and pride perhaps.
As for comparing a penis to a sex toy, well.. again it speaks to your inexperience - I bet you wouldn't like to be compared to a "flesh-light" either.
If you don't enjoy it, then don't have penetrative sex.
However, you might want to stop expecting a guys penis to be some magic wand made for YOUR pleasure. It's not. You are far more likely to have pleasurable sex with stimulation to the clitoris AS the majority of your pleasure nerve endings are situated THERE and not inside the vagina. (which again, is a good thing... You do not WANT too many nerve ending is a muscle that needs to have the ability to stretch and make way for a baby.)
So, my advice, stop ratting on the penises. They are what they are. A body part on males. No more, no less. Why men are so focused on them? Who knows. Why are some women obsessed with having beach-ball sized boobs?
Don't judge a man by the size of his penis. Judge him for WHO he is, what he does.
Just my 3 cents. You're welcome.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (20 April 2016):
 I guess everyone has different views on sex, but I must admit that I have never heard a woman saying that all men's genitals are small and pointless. Me personally I feel that this post is very harsh and if it was said to a man it can dent his confidence.
There could be a number of reasons why you feel like this. Maybe you are not getting enough enjoyment from sex at the moment and you are blaming the man, or it could be that you are just not all that bothered about sex at the moment. I mean from your post you are still very young, so maybe stay away from sex for a while and just enjoy life. I am sure someday when you meet the right partner you will see how special it can be.
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