A
female
age
30-35,
*ishAlot
writes:Ive been with my current boyfriend for 8 months now. To begin with when we first started seeing each other his ex was still trying to get him back and would basically slag me.She would text him saying he should stop seeing me and that im a fat and ugly whore and say mean things. Her and her friends would also make fun of me on facebook and when out together and if we ever saw them they'd call me names.Then a month later we became official and by this time she kinda stopped.Then every so often he would get a random text from her asking if he's available yet or if he's seen his ways and dumped me to which he just ignored. (He deleted her number so whenever she texts it just shows up as a number he doesnt know) Well after that she mostly text him whenever she was drunk then she stopped for the longest time then one sunday he got a text from her thanking him for dumping her and said ever since shes been single she got 2 jobs and got her survival so she can go offshore and is making better money and have been on holiday and finished by saying if she was still with him she would have none of that...to which he ignored and yet again didnt reply. (when they were together she lived with him and didnt give him any money because she wasnt working and told him she was getting 20 a week which he found out she was actually getting 70 a week and she had been lying and buying herself handbags, clothes, shoes etc rather than help him out by paying a bill or even buying food and he even gave her money thinking she was only getting 20 so that played a part in them finishing)Anyways the week after he then recieved a text from her saying what more do you want from me. I already told you that id give you every penny i make if i have to and ive got myself 2 jobs so ive proved im willing to work and i went on holiday showing i can save money and maybe even treat you so what more do you want, what do i have to do for you to want me back?he yet again ignored it because when she was being nasty to me and calling me every name under the sun he told her that he wants nothing more to do with her. he said he would have quite happpily remained friends with her but because of how she had been acting he know wants nothing more to do with her which he stayed true to his word.2 weeks ago we were at his mums house and his ex has text his brother twice. first time asking if my bf has the same number and then second time asking why his brother wasnt replying either saying that she had done nothing wrong to either guys and doesnt deserve to be ignored and wants to know why my bf wont talk to her and i dont know what else. his mum isnt very happy and was all i will text her if she keeps this up.then a few days ago my parents came home from holiday and asked me what my bf's intentions with me are. i ask why then they come clean saying that my aunt, grandma and cousin and a few other people have came and said that they heard my bf is using me for money. (i stay with him and pay him 65 per week, its his own house we stay in where he pays the mortage and the money i give him goes halves on the likes of gas, electricity, phone, internet, tv, house insurance, boiler insurance, council tax, food and i dont remember what else) they said that they've heard he uses girls for money to help him pay. When he first moved into the house he moved in with an ex gf and it was him who gave her money and he gave her 110 per week then they split up and she transferred the mortgage to him and since then the only other girl who has lived with him is his ex and she gave him 20 every month if he was lucky.I have since found out that this info from my aunt, gran and cousin came from my other cousin and his wife (whom he married this year) and his wifes cousin....is my bf's ex. and the other random people my parents heard this from...it came from people who know either his ex or her family members or her friends and their family members.I dont know what to do. I want to go and comfront her. No i actually want to go and punch this girl but my bf said thats exactly what she wants...confrontation. I dont want my family to be wary of my bf or thinking that he's using me in the back of their minds. How do I fix this? Whats the best thing that I should really do?
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cousin, drunk, ex girlfriend, facebook, his ex, money, moved in, on holiday, split up, text Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Atsweet1  +, writes (7 August 2012):
 I think people think this about me but its no fact in me using any person for money so if its not true no need to worry or be alarmed they want to split you two up
A
female
reader, BondGirl72 +, writes (6 August 2012):
 Your boyfriend should not really be telling you about every single text he receives from his ex. In fact, he should block her/not read them/respond to them himself. This is a good lesson to learn in case you ever have to deal with anyone else who messes or meddles with you. He should not communicate with this ex under any circumstances. Family should know she's causing trouble and you two do not want to hear about anything she has to say. It's really then up to your family to turn her off and tune her out.
The main problem I have with this is your boyfriend who seems to like to entertain her texts, while at the same time telling you about them and making you furious. Once again, he should block her texts or immediately delete them when he receives one. It almost seems as if he is playing her against you and it's really not fair.
All of this texting is just nothing but trouble. The same is true if you're on Facebook or are emailing. People will talk all kinds of trash when using these forms of communication. The best thing to do is shut the person down. Your friends and family should know the truth, so what this girl says shouldn't matter and none of you should care. Stop giving her so much of your time and energy.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (6 August 2012):
 Take your BF home to meet your family. Beforehand sit down with your BF and make budget so they can see where the money goes. (since they are worried about that)
As for the EX, don't jump in the gutter with her. IGNORE IGNORE IGNORE.
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A
male
reader, Hennessy1989 +, writes (6 August 2012):
 I can understand your anger, and while the urge to teach this trouble maker a lesson is very tempting, I urge you to follow in your boyfriends footsteps, he has handled this in the best way possible, this woman is obviously madly in love with him, and gets her kicks out of knowing that she is still havin an effect on his life, as a couple continue to ignore her completely, it will hurt her a lot more if she sees that her efforts to ruin your relationship are proving a waste of time, eventually she will stop, but only if u both completely act as of she doesn't exist, as for the money thing explain to your family what you have written here, and like the other poster said introduce them. If she continues much loncallow if it gets worse I would consider that you call the police
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (6 August 2012):
 Your boyfriend should meet your family so they see the real him. As they interact more they will know his true intention. Don't make it complicated. You are the innocent one here you shouldn't have to work hard to pick up the pieces. The only thing you do is continue to be supportive to your boyfriend and trust that he will settle the misunderstanding with your family.
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