A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hello guy's my name is Dan and i am 20 years old please don't judge.I have been very worried recently over the type of porn i used to watch as a teen 13 - 19(not sure when i actually started) I used to watch normal hetrosexual porn (not for long) then discovered gay porn, i moved off the gay stuff as i was like 13/14 immature kid who was like i don't want to be gay!(hope I didn't offend) about a year later i started using tranny porn, but then layed off that with the same reaction, then till now i was watching other porn which i am also worried about(last paragraph), when i continued watching hetro porn sometimes i would visuelize me being the women and other days me being the man.Now about my life i have a girlfriend who i am attracted to and have fun sex with, and when i look around i am attracted to women and the thought of kissing, holding hands or other romantic things with a guy doesnt do it for me(not trying to defend 3 gays), if i really try to think hard i could imagine something sexually, it usually only happens through porn when i really think about it and i am turned on, does this make me bi sexual?This Part i am really embarrassed about when i continued watching porn throughout mid - late teens, i got really into disgusting things(imagine all types of women you can think of (except scat) gangbangs did alot for me the most(maybe because there was more guys in it?) then it moved onto rape porn! i dont know if it was real(i hope not) it was on a tube site but i just liked the intesity of it and all the kinkyness of it, there wasnt like blood, knifes and guns in it, just some real reeeaalll rough sex? maybe a fetish? if you know what i mean, i also get turned on a little if there are some scenes like that in a movie(male or female) which makes me feel really bad when i watch it as the usual reaction is ewwww.Now am i just a sicko who is into anything? or a bi guy who likes it a bit rough? I dont have desires to do anything like that in real life although i was very troublesome teenager (suffered from social anxiety which made me leave school and a bit aggresive to my family) i am a calm nice guy, please can you give some advice to a 20 year old lad :) thank you for reading and hopefully not judging.I asked this question due to the fact i have heard bi sexuality does not exist, which is making me feel like a bit of a sicko and wondering what else i could be attracted to..Extra info:Just to point out when it comes to the female side of things I am very attracted to them! i love it even more when they dress up! My type is either really slutty( i know bad) or really innocent types, I am not into things most typical guys are interested in like cars and football although i do watch it sometimes (most likely due to my time out of social anxiety)My best friend is a girl and i have quite a few male best friend's but I find girls more relaxing and less on edge to chill with I am not really feminine at all but i do like alot of the stuff my Best friend likes its a mixture really.Thank you again!!!!!!
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female
reader, Porn_Divorcee  +, writes (31 January 2012):
 Whether or not you're bi is not clear (even if you are, so what?), but what is clear is that you're not a sicko but it does sound like you are suffering the ill effects of watching a lot of porn. You see, despite what many men feel, pornography is not real and there is a growing body of evidence to suggest that it is as addicting as drugs or alcohol because watching it on a regular basis actually makes your brain react the same way it would if you were taking mood altering substances.My ex-husband was addicted to porn and I the only reason I suspected that he was an addict was because not only did our sex life dramatically decreased in regularity and in pleasure but I start to see changes in his personality (which I now realize was as a direct result of his addiction).If you are interested, there are four different things you can try to combat your "possible" porn addiction. I hope they help.1. Be sure you are actually a porn addict (a.k.a. "pornaholic"). There's an excellent test that will help you reflect on how much of a problem your porn viewing has become which you can find at http://www.optenetpc.com/blog/porn-addiction/porn-addiction-test/2. Take practical steps to break the habit. If you look at porn on the computer, move it or use your laptop in a public area in the home. Then let a trusted friend or family member monitor your computer's browsing history by using a top-notch porn detection software like http://findhisporn.com (there are others but this service is pretty good).3. Look back over the past few times you've spent hours looking at porn online, or viewed material you're ashamed of and think about what the trigger was. For example, if you view porn when you've been especially low and lonely, work out a plan of action in advance for the next time you feel that way.4. You are more liable to become addicted to internet pornography if you had a childhood which makes genuine intimacy hard for you now. If this is the case, strongly consider seeing a therapist or a counselor as they are in excellent position to either help you were to refer you to someone who can help.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 January 2012): It's just like you described me in that age :D.Seriously to the every last bit.
Later in time I lost interest in these kind of things like gay or tranny. Just try to imagine you would really have sex with a guy you know or some tranny. I like tranny sex because it was rough. I really enjoy forced sex/rough sex. The things you see on porn sites is not real and real rape would not look like that. I just grew out of it I guess. I wouldnt stress about it at all man.
I still enjoy rough sex, but just with my girlfriend and tranny and gay porn does not turn me on any more.
You are definitely not a sicko :D. Just exploring your sexuality. My honest guess is that you are hetero with some gay/tranny fantasies. Trust me, porn makes look everything hot , but in real life it would disgust you and turn you off.
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A
female
reader, chickpea2011 +, writes (30 January 2012):
 Hi,
First of all, you are not sicko. I think you are just learning how to discover yourself sexually. Yes, I believe there are many people that are bi-sexual, do enjoy being with man and female. It's really difficult to give you the right explanation or a solid answer. Many people male/female discover their preferences in different ages in life, I am sure you can read endless stories... Some people like normal sex, some people like it crazy, some like it rough, it's all a matter of preference and if you like your own ways doesn't mean you are sicko. Just continue to explore, learn, find out what you like most, enjoy, have fun... There no right or wrong way... Just know that it's ok and that's who you are... Don't feel pressure or judge, it's your life and you have the right to live your life the way you want. As long as nobody get physically hurt, fantasies are allow...
Good luck/best wishes
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