If I choose love over my dreams, wil regret it?
Q. Used to date this guy for 2 years, 7 years ago. We broke up because i moved to another country to study in the university but everytime i go back to my home town we hook up. I still love him a lot and he says that he still loves me too. My dream was ...
A. 30 August 2012: Dont give up education, life plans, a good job, or dreams for anyone this young. If you're married, thats one thing, but IMO bfs/gfs are a dime a dozen, and come quite easily. Dreams dont.... (read in full...)
I can't get over the fear he will leave me for someone younger.
Q. Hi! I am 39 yrs old and my bf is 22. Among the all the suitors I had, he had been the most determined that's the reason I chose him. I know someday he will be leaving me for a much younger lady. This fear keeps haunting me every time I look at him. ...
A. 30 August 2012: SVC and I have very different views on this, albiet her's is because she is in such a relationship, and mine is on empirical data.
I have said this before, can such a relationship work out? Yes, of course it can. That said, the odds of it lasti... (read in full...)
I want to call off the engagement! I'm freaking out!
Q. I am freaking out! I am getting married next month and... I don't want to!! I want to call this engagement off! It's not that I don't love my bf, it's just that this whole marriage thing is scaring the hell out of me. So many things can go wrong in...
A. 30 August 2012: Marriage, next to having children, is the single most important decision a person can make. Regarding your own happiness, it is the single most important. I would suggest that you only go into it if you are 100% certain. However hard it seems to ... (read in full...)
Porn and insecurities
Q. I need help. I know that there are a TON of porn and strip club questions out there, I know. But I really need some advice. I have been with my boyfriend for almost a year, and it has been great. We get along so well, we have a lot in common, e...
A. 30 August 2012: It seems to me that to a certain degree porn/strip clubs to women :: retroactive jealousy to men.
Both are in fact are in fact a bit irrational taken by themselves, unless, of course, you are the one being effected by it.
IMO, both are relics ... (read in full...)
Tattoos of each other's names. Now we've split up, should I get mine covered?
Q. Me and my boyfriend have recently split up we both have tattoos of each others names I booked to have mine covered over but they can't do it til after Christmas my ex is having a tattoo done Christmas time when I asked him is he having my tattoo ...
A. 30 August 2012: I think the moral of the story here is -
Relationships: Temporary
Tatoos: Permanent
Proceed accordingly.... (read in full...)
Our anniversary is on a Thursday but he wants to go out on Saturday. Why?
Q. it's me and my boyfriends 1 year anniversary next month. I mentioned it and he said he'd already planned to take me to a certain restaurant I like so I'm happy that he's put some thought into it. our anniversary falls on a Thursday but he wants to ...
A. 30 August 2012: Its completely normal to celebrate a day falling on a weekday on the weekend. Perhaps you should just be happy that he wants to do something for you.... (read in full...)
Having an affair with a married woman.
Q. Hello, Thanks in advance for your help in this matter. Her's my issue: I have known this woman for several years online. We planned on meeting in person a few times and it fell through each time. We live in different cities and the timing just wasn...
A. 30 August 2012: There are no "complications" here other than the ones you are manufacturing. This couldnt be more straight forward. She is married. In having sex w you, she is committing adultery, which you are facilitating. (As a side bar, I wouldnt consider ... (read in full...)
I've been hurt so badly in old relationships that I don't want to approach girls anymore. How do I overcome this?
Q. Ok, where do I start? Well, I've been hurt a lot in relationships and now I find myself hesitating before stepping up to a girl that I find attractive. I just think of all the negatives and how there's not enough reason for me to actually ask her ...
A. 23 August 2012: Its like riding a bike - you just need to get back on go. The longer you wait, the worse it will get.
You are in your prime "hit on women" ages. Im 44 now, and I for a very short time I felt the way you are feeling. I can promise you at my ag... (read in full...)
I am a cheater but is that really so bad?
Q. I am cheating on my GF. should i stop. i cant help it i like the excitement of chasing new women and when i see a beautiful woman im curious how it feels to be with her. but i like having something guaranteed at home. but people make it seem like a ...
A. 22 August 2012: You know - its funny, but I think I heard your girlfriend saying the same exact thing......
Now how wrong is it?... (read in full...)
I want to have a baby but it's not happening!
Q. So I'm 19 and me and my fiance live together..everything is perfect! I am beyond in love with this man.the problem is,I want to share more with him..I bet you're thinking "what more could she want?" this may sound crazy but I want to have his ...
A. 22 August 2012: The first thing you should do is make sure you are financially capable of handling a child. Raising a child from cradle to 18 in the us is north of $200,000. ... (read in full...)
Should I stop talking to this guy?
Q. So around December I added this guy on Facebook because he seemed very interesting to me. We started talking and it turns out he is 7 years older than me, so at first he said he felt uncomfortable for talking to such a young lady. Later on though, ...
A. 22 August 2012: Meeting people for relationships through social media is high on the list of things one should not do, IMO.... (read in full...)
I went snooping on my b/f. Now we are trying to get things back to normal but its strained! Help?
Q. I admit I was snooping and found lots of pictures of a my fiances exes that he said he had deleted. I was depressed about it and left it a few days before I spoke to him about it. When I did he went mad, first saying he thought he had deleted them ...
A. 22 August 2012: With anyone, if you look long and far enough, you will find something you dont like. As human beings, none of us is perfect. IMO you are getting what you deserve by invading his privacy. ... (read in full...)
Why did I sleep with my best friend's husband? I know I betrayed my friend. How do I fix this?
Q. My best friend, her husband and I have been friends since the 10th grade. My friend and I both got married 2 years after we left high school. I got divorced and they remained married. Throughout the 16 yrs that they've been married they both have...
A. 21 August 2012: I cant add more than what Stacy63 said.... (read in full...)
Too soon to share past sexual history? It scared me. Do ALL guys do this during online relationships?
Q. Is this a red flag?...I just started talking to someone I met online, and things were going great until he starts asking me about what is the most wildest and crazy thing I have done sexually. I didn't want to answer that because I feel that it ...
A. 21 August 2012: Similarly to what Honeypie said, many guys have problems w women w colorful sexual pasts, and thus like to "weed them out" before they get involved. If they question is given early, odds are thats whats happening. I have done the same before - its ... (read in full...)
I've been lied to again but don't know how to confront her...
Q. I've just found out from my girlfriend's brother in-law that she deceived me again. To cut a long story short, she's lied to me a few times on about where she's been and other different things. I met up with my girlfriends brother in-law to ta...
A. 21 August 2012: This is cut and dry. She will not change - you need to move on before you invest anymore emotional or physical capital into this woman. Let her be someone else's problem.... (read in full...)
I am a separated woman trying to date. After you've read it all do you think I should see a therapist?
Q. Apologies! This situation description isnt as short as I'd hoped it would be. Click back if you dont want to read a long story. I want responses, but if I dont get any because my post is too long, at least I'll have cyber-vented! My husband an...
A. 21 August 2012: My view on this. As a "separated woman," you are still married. You need to finish one thing before you move on to something else. In some states, your ex could even make an adultery case against you.
Finish your divorce, get your life together... (read in full...)
Is it possible for a cheater to end up happy with the person he cheated with?
Q. My boyfriend of six years cheated, and left me for the woman he cheated with. Although I'm past the hurt, sometime I wonder is it possible for a cheater to be happy with the person he cheated with.I wish him and her the best and hope he is a better ...
A. 21 August 2012: I was cheated on once by a gf. It was a LD relationship, so I should have seen it coming. In any event, they ended up getting married. He was also cheating on a gf. I have no idea how they are doing now, but my last thought about her was that ... (read in full...)
There's this guy. And he's cheating on his girlfriend.. with me!
Q. There's this guy. And he's cheating on his girlfriend.. with me. I'm the other girl. I honestly love him and think he's the one. However, he told me he's thinking of breaking up with his girlfriend to be with me, but he hasn't yet. and...
A. 14 August 2012: Your in a great relationship if you want to be second fiddle your whole life.
Spoiler - hes not leaving his gf. Its not happening.
Proceed accordingly. ... (read in full...)
Is it fair to ask my boyfriend to pay the bills if he moves in and pay no rent?
Q. Would it be fair to ask for my boyfriend to pay all bills (electricity, gas and water) if he moved in with me? I have a house but have a mortgage. He is wanting us to live together but only gives me options of selling or renting mine out and get...
A. 14 August 2012: If he's living there, he should be responsible for half of the expenses if its just the two of you. That includeds everything - mortgage/rent, prop taxes, cable, electric/gas, etc.
There is no gray area here. Very straightforward.... (read in full...)
Am I asking for too much in our sexual relationship?
Q. I'm not sure if I've just ruined our relationship or not. My partner and I have been together for 6 months and I love him completely. He has asked me to marry him and nothing would make me happier and I said yes. We have known each other for ...
A. 14 August 2012: Ive been with my fiancee for over five years, and in that time sex has not died down for a moment. Things dying down after 1-6 months sounds like material for a fling, not a marriage.... (read in full...)
Does her sexual past matter? Would I prefer this new friend over my GF just because of my Gf's sexual past?
Q. I have never been the jealous type and I am not sure I would define what I feel as jealousy. My new girlfriend sexual past is really affecting me. I have had quite a few girlfriends in my life and never felt anything like this before. Not even c...
A. 14 August 2012: What you have is something called retroactive jealousy, and it effects many men, and some women. There is nothing abnormal about it at all, its simply a relic of our evolution that is inconvenient in todays society.
This is something that I h... (read in full...)
I'm obsessed with the married man I had an affair with, and he told me that he wishes I were dead! How could he say such hateful things to me?
Q. I had an affair with a married man, he broke it off and it was not pretty. I told his wife...to make a long story short...I would send him cards every once in a while..I think I'm obsessed with him. We ride motorcycles and he is a member of a MC ...
A. 8 August 2012: What Candid Cally below fails to mention is its not entirely what "HE" did to "YOU," its also about what "YOU" did to "YOURSELF."
It takes two, and if you knew he was married (and I think you did), you have absolutely no one to blame but yourself... (read in full...)
Is he having a mid-life crisis? Is this not love?
Q. Because What would a man his age want with a woman like this? Ok well my Ex and I we are split up for about 5 months . We still tells me about his life , and for the past 3 months he is constantly talking about his friend he met for the first time ...
A. 8 August 2012: Long story short - its none of your business. On the other side of the coin, he shouldnt be telling you either.
All that said, my guess is he's trying to make you jealous. From your reaction, it looks like its working marvelously.... (read in full...)
How can I get him to stop the horrible comments and accusations of me cheating on him?
Q. My boyfriend of 2 1/2 years keeps accusing me of cheating. I have never had a sexual relationship outside of our relationship. He is always saying that sometimes I am significantly tighter than others. I tell him that its because I am tightening my ...
A. 8 August 2012: I dated a woman once who was divorced because of her husband cheating on her. It was hell - she was always demanding I had my phone with me at all times, and would always answer. She demanded it as "transparancy" in the relationship, which really ... (read in full...)
Should I tell him he Isn't the father and risk losing him or keep it from him?
Q. Ok I hope this doesen't sound too shallow...I recently got pregnant with an ex who is a complete and utter ass as well as verbally abusive to me. Shortly after the break-up my best friend introduced me to a friend of her's who is the sweetest most ...
A. 8 August 2012: This is as cut and dry of an "issue" as I have ever read here.
1 - The real father has the right to know he has a child out there, no matter if he is an "ass" or not, no shades of gray here. To be blunt, I wonder if he was so much of an "ass," t... (read in full...)
Long distance stringing along?
Q. Met a guy 6 months ago, he knew I was moving West in a few months he fell in lone with me and I fell for him too. We spent 4 months together every night then I left for Nevada. We are 1700 miles apart he calls or web cam daily, says he misses me ...
A. 8 August 2012: Ive been in two long distance relationships before. They last 6-12 months before a decision in either direction must be made. ... (read in full...)
Cell phone etiquette, She answers messages during intercourse!
Q. My girlfriend's idea of turning off the cell phone while having sex, is to just put it on vibrate. The noise totally takes me out of the moment and is getting extremely annoying. I ask her to please turn off the phone to allow us to have some ...
A. 8 August 2012: For a "crisis?" I sometimes wonder how the human species ever made it to 1995 without cell phones, I mean, with all those crises and all.....
You need to let your wife know that you need her too, and as her husband you come first, just as she d... (read in full...)
I want to become a stripper!
Q. I know people will read this and may think this sounds like a sleazy kinda job, but I really want to become a lap dancer (stripper) or my biggest dream is to be a burlesque dancer. it has always been my passion, I am an intelligent girl and left ...
A. 8 August 2012: Remember this - once you become a stripper - you never can "undo" it. Not even when you meet the guy of your dreams and have to tell him what your past profession was.
As others have said below, you're looking for confidence in all of the wron... (read in full...)
B/f & I are not on the same page about things that are important to me!
Q. Hi I would just like to check with you guys, I have been with my boyfriend for a year, and we enjoy being together but you get to know a bit more about a person as time passes and I have found some areas where we are not on the same page like buying ...
A. 2 August 2012: Those are some pretty big things to be apart on. Remember, marriage is just as much a financial arrangement as anything else. I think your "time out" means "move on."... (read in full...)
Why do woman hook up with married men?
Q. My question is simple, Why do women hook up with a married man? I would like to hear from those who had a relationship with a married man, why did you do it? Love? Sex? Adventure? ...
A. 1 August 2012: I think part of the reason is some women find it more exciting to take something another woman has, like she is "winning," or something to that effect.
In the end though, it comes down to what was said below - "bad judgement."... (read in full...)
How can I help my boyfriend keep a stable job?
Q. How can I help my boyfriend, he hasn't been able to hold a job for longer than three to six months. He keeps getting let go and it seems to me for the most ridiculous reasons, such as talking too much and too loudly.I've been with him for about a ...
A. 1 August 2012: I have been in the work force for over 20 years, and anyone who cannot consistently keep a job for more than three months has no one to blame but themselves.
Ive seen this many times before and unfortunately, I believe this is a result of an intri... (read in full...)
Every time I invite her to do something she's busy. Is she just not interested?
Q. Hello, I met this girl a 2 weeks ago through a mutual friend. That night i took her number and told her we would do something soon enough. A few days later we went out and we had a blast, I ever ran into another friend of mine who saw us toget...
A. 1 August 2012: For starters, calling her the next day was a mistake. You should have waited at least two or three days then send a non-chalant text. No woman wants to be with a man who has no other options.
That said, if your play it cool and she's still "t... (read in full...)
If I started dating to spice up my marriage would that be cuckolding my husband?
Q. AS a joke my husband took and posted few photos of me on the internet. Over time he received loads of request for more and after telling me what he did it became a real turn-on for us both. I later started a web-site and the request for more, gifts ...
A. 1 August 2012: What you are asking is if you can have sex outside your marriage with your husbands permission, so lets call it what it is.
The decision is up to the two of you, but I cannot envision a scenario where this ends well.... (read in full...)
Am I weird that I have multiple girls I have a crush on and all at the same time? Does this happen to other guys?
Q. Is it weird to have crush's on different girls at the same time? I am a 13 year old guy and I want to know of it is a little weird to have multiple crushes all at the same time where I like different girls. I like girls and I have had lots of crush...
A. 1 August 2012: At your age, its not weird at all, and as you grow it may get worse (or better, depending on how you look at it!). I'm 44, and my attraction to woman sure hasnt diminished in the last 30 years.
You're a (soon to be) man, its very normal to be at... (read in full...)
Could it be he really doesn't want to get married?
Q. My boyfriend is 41 and has never been married. We have been together for a year. When I ask him if he sees himself getting married in the future his response is "maybe, I'm not sure". I would think that by 41 you would know if you wanted to get ...
A. 31 July 2012: Im 44 and got engaged for the first time in Feb. For me, it was all about waiting for the right person since its the single most important decision one can ever make. In retrospect, SO glad I waited.
I was with my gf for 3 yrs before asking, ... (read in full...)
How do I make my arms bigger?
Q. i need to help that what should i do for getting a big arms ? and i have been gyming for last 3 year but it doesn't work? so can anyone tell me what should i do...
A. 26 July 2012: As someone else has said, its a combination of nutrition and working out. I will add genetics as well, but that usually only kicks in later. You can work out 24 hours a day, but if your body doesnt have enough complete amino acids to form protein, ... (read in full...)
Should we get engaged when we are this young?
Q. Hey Cupids, me and my bf have currently been discussing getting engaged to a point where i even heard him talking to his mom about rings. Im in my sophmore year of college and he is a freshman in college as well. We have been living together...
A. 26 July 2012: I dont believe people should be getting engaged (or having children) until they are completely financially independent. Being married and having children are mature acts. Being financially dependent on others is sign of immaturity.... (read in full...)
Ladies: What Keeps A Guy Out Your Friend Zone?
Q. I've noticed that some guys sabotage their own luck with women, and may not know it. What they do to woo a woman, can sometimes end up friendzoning him instead. Outside physical attraction (which may be outside your control), what things can a guy...
A. 26 July 2012: I agree w Cerberus. Back in my teens when I was a "nice guy," I was constantly in the "friend zone." Its a nice way for saying "Im not attracted to you." When I got into my late teens and 20s and became much more self-confident and even arrogart ... (read in full...)
I confided in my friend about my partner's cheating and now I feel like I crossed the line
Q. I'm in a situation, I found out my boyfriend had cheated on me but we agreed to work stuff out. As it was a year later I found out he confessed everything we confronted the situation spoke to a counceller. But before we did all this I found myself ...
A. 26 July 2012: Im big on not doing your laundry in public. Once you've released information, you can never get it back, and you've totally lost control of who gets it from then.
The temptation is to vent, and I understand that, but realize the problem ... (read in full...)
I don't if I should start a long distance relationship, because I fear boredom with no physical contact is just gonna kill attraction or do I begin a relationship and hopefully keep it going?
Q. So I started talking to this girl on and off after meeting her at a rave, but the conversations were just mutual and friendly, like to hang out soon. So after a while I haven't heard from her and we met again at a rave and everything changed. We ...
A. 24 July 2012: Having done them before, I would dissuade you from a LD relationship for any significant amount of time. When I did it, I was working on Wall St so I had a lot of disposible income to travel on whenever I wanted. It was also cool to be visiting ... (read in full...)
I have all these feelings for her and I don't know what to do with them. Please help!
Q. So I've known this girl for around 10 years and we've always been really close friends but more recently I've developed feelings for her that I just can't seem to shake. Not long ago I decide to tell her how I feel and I asked her to be my GF. She ...
A. 24 July 2012: Tough spot to be in. You need to go 100% in one direction or another. You need to either forget about her romantically, or you need to forget about her completely. A hybrid of friend/gf will NOT work, and only lead to heartache. First though, ... (read in full...)
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