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People tell me that I am beautiful, smart, have a shining personality, but guys never want to date me because of my weight? Why don't guys date big girls?

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Question - (30 September 2007) 4 Answers - (Newest, 30 September 2007)
A female United States age 36-40, *andy_kisses4987 writes:

I am 20 years old. I have had one serious relationship and a few boyfriends. I think it has been because I am overweight. I never thought it mattered. I love myself and i have more confidence than most people. People tell me that I am beautiful, smart, and have a shining personality, but guys never want to date me because of my weight. Please tell me,why is this? Why dont guys date big girls? What do they find so appalling? Any feedback and/or advice would be appreciated, especially from a guy

View related questions: confidence, overweight

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A female reader, happytochat Australia +, writes (30 September 2007):

They may not be dating you because of your weight...it could be some other reason.

I myself am fairly skinny and people tell me im beautiful and I have a great personality too, but have always found it hard finding a guy who is interested in me.

So try not to let your weight get you down, because I bet even if you were thinner it may not make a difference! But if say you were, then all that means is you may attract more shallow guys- people who would only be interested in you for looks and im sure thats not what you wnat.

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A female reader, DrPsych United Kingdom +, writes (30 September 2007):

DrPsych agony auntI don't think your size has much to do with it. You will find that different guys like different shapes and sizes, ultimately a good boyfriend for you is one who appreciates you just the way you are - you really shouldn't have to change anything about you to get along with him! At 20 it is not unexpected that you would have few relationships behind you...as you get older then you will meet guys from different walks of life and find out what sort of men you really want to date as opposed to what sort of men will date you.

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A female reader, lisa21 United Kingdom +, writes (30 September 2007):

don't take this the wrong way, but are you sure you are confident? as there is a big difference in being confident which is great, to being over confident and bragging? it may not be the case but i don't know you so i'm just warning you. alot of guys are horrible when it comes to the weight thing but there are good men out there who will love you for the person you are inside, you will meet him when you least expect it. x x x

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A male reader, kenny United Kingdom + , writes (30 September 2007):

kenny agony auntThem not wanting to date probably has not got anything to do with your weight atal, you would more than likely get the same reaction if you were stick think. I don't think its true that guys don't date larger girls, infact i think more guys prefer a girl to have a bit of meat on their bones as a pose to a skinny girl. When people tell you that you are beautiful, smart, and carry a shining personality take this on board because its true. I think your problem is you just have not found the right guy yet. Give it time you are still only young, relax, have fun, enjoy life and you will meet your perfect guy when you least expect it.

Hope this helps, & good luck x

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