A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I've recently started dating a girl from my work who is the sweet, caring, interesting, real girlfriend material. Before her I was casually seeing a girl I met online, it was nothing serious, just dating and a lot of sex really. Now here's my dilemma... around her, I was constantlu turned on, often aroused for no reason at all, I didn't particularly find her that attractive but for some reason she really got me going! Now my new girl, I'm attracted to her, love spending time with her, but she doesn't really turn me on, things aren't as "full" or as "hard" as they were with the other girl. I'm trying to work out why this could be but I'm at a loose end. Any ideas?
View related questions:
met online Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, singinbluebird  +, writes (20 September 2017):
 Easy-- you just had more sexual chemistry with the casual girl. She probably was more interested your body, fun, bold, and horny. I feel like your girlfriend is probably mote sweet and endearing than sexual. Every girl is different. You have to tell her what you like so she can set herself free in bed. Sometimes women self control their behaviors in bed but they fail realize men like them wild and free like horses on Nevada plains.
What Im saying is sexual compatibility is very important. Ive met great guys who were not great in bed. And decent conversational mem who rocked my world sexually. Its all about the chemistry, pheromones, behavior, and willingness set yourself free.
Maybe try ways losen up your gf. She sounds lovely so i suggest giving her time before considering if she is right partner for you. Good luck !
A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (18 September 2017):
 That's because with the other girl, it was just sex and no commitment, nothing. Just wham thank you ma'am and then you both go your ways. And because you know she's seeing you just for the sex and no other frills, you're always ready to perform. It's heady because it's plain lust
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 September 2017): I had the same thing before (many years ago) it wasn't an online thing but it was a fun sex based thing/relationship then I went into a real relationship and it was different even tho like you I was more attracted to my new man.
For me I thought it was because with the first person you know sex is the thing you do so you are constantly ready for it knowing it could happen anytime anywhere. But with the second person you are actually trying to build some bridges, be considerate of them, find out what they like.
You are probably putting more thought into this and that's what's hindering you being "full" and "hard" overthinking is the polar opposite of lust.
Let me just add I've been with the 'new man' for over ten years now and once you learn each other there is no better sex than that.
...............................
A
male
reader, Denizen +, writes (18 September 2017):
 I would be interested to hear what you think the reason might be. You know the situation. the dialogue, the promise and fascination, so much better than we.
We can, after all, only guess. Perhaps it's just pheromones, or lack of them?
...............................
|
