A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I was seeing someone on/off for 3 years. He got divorced about 10 months ago. Seemed interested at first, but then we had a disagreement. He then back tracked ever since. Which was 7 months ago. He insisted he didn't want to be in a relationship. Despite this I continued to see him.I went on holiday, when I returned I thought things where the same as before I went on holiday. He eventually told me that he'd met someone else and that, they were just seeing how things would go. I asked him, thought you didn't want a relationship. He replied I don't, just seeing how things go.This was all on text unfortunately. I didn't over react, kept calm and was polite. He was still happy to be friends and meet only as friends.However I then replied that I wanted to wish him all the best for the future and take care. But he didn't reply to my last message. I then deleted him off facebook, but later I realized that he'd blocked me after I'd deleted him.I thought we were close as things he told me weren't something he would've told others. He's a very private person and keeps himself to himself... (generally).I know I shouldn't be letting it affect me, but it's easier said than done. I don't know why he didn't wish me well or even apologies for how things turned out.Any advice/opinion would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 May 2013): Tough love time here!
You meant nothing to him. He was married, you were only ever a bit on the side and he openly said he didnt want a relationship to you, but is in a relationship with someone else. Because you meant nothing to him. Just sex I guess.
And I am worried with some replies talking about the FB situation, cos it might give you false hope. He doesnt want you, so who cares about FB?? The fact he blocked you indicates he thinks of you more like a stalker than a potential partner.
Find a man who respects you and wants to be in a relationship with you and you alone. Forget this loser and move on. In no time, you will be shocked you ever let this jerk treat you like this.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 May 2013): "I know I shouldn't be letting it affect me, but it's easier said than done. I don't know why he didn't wish me well or even apologies for how things turned out."
Wow for a woman your age you have a lot to learn about us guys still.
First off why would he apologise or be in any way respectful of some on/off side pussy, cheating with him on his wife?
I wouldn't, you're just side pussy, I get to throw you away and do whatever I like with you because you're not worth respecting (not you personally of course, you as side pussy), you get as much a respect as the respect we'd have been giving my wife, none. And separation is still married. Sorry to say that OP, and I know I come off as cruel and callous but that's what side pussy is, a warm hole to stick it in you keep sweet so her legs stay open, no more worthy of respect than a condom, put it on, use it then discard it.
Oh and OP even my 18 year old sister has known since she was 14 that "I don't want a relationship right now" means "I don't want a relationship with you". Go look at how many questions we get from women asking why the guy they were sleeping with is in a relationship now when he said he didn't want one, we get about 10 a day.
He has nothing to apologise for and you were never important enough to him to even care about wishing you well.
Don't feel bad OP, don't beat yourself up and you can go on blaming him all you want, it won't help. Just learn some lessons here. Stay away from married men, even if they're separated. Don't waste your time with an on/off relationship and learn for once and for all that when a guy says he doesn't want a relationship, especially with a woman he's been fucking for 3 years it means he will never, ever want to be in one with you.
Just move on OP, you deserve better than him, you deserve better than what you've let happen here and he has nothing to offer you. Live and learn OP, you'll get over this and hopefully won't fall into any of the same traps again.
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A
female
reader, sugarplum786  +, writes (28 May 2013):
 Hi, let it go and dont torture yourself my over analysing and wishing for closure. You are not going to get any comfort and he is unlikely coming back to you. I suggest you close this chapter in your life and move on to avoid you becoming a bitter and negative person. No contact and move on to greener fields. Some people are not worth the pain and your tears.
The more you dwell on the past and trying figure what went wrong, the more miserable you will be and the healing will not start until you accept it and let go.
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A
male
reader, CMMP  +, writes (28 May 2013):
In fairness you deleted him. That's pretty close to blocking. So the only difference here is that he didn't reply to your text.
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A
female
reader, oldbag +, writes (28 May 2013):
 Hi
He told you he didn't want to be in a relationship, which is perfectly normal with new divorcees.Now he has somebody new, seeing how it goes. He already friend zoned you months ago but when you deleted him off FB he knew your friendship wasn't going to continue in any form now he is dating someone and that's that.
Maybe his new woman told him to block you,ignore you, I doubt she would be happy with him remaining friends as you were with him last.
I don't think you will get an apology or anything else, he has moved on. Best thing you can do is forget him as he was never really available to you, all you can do is move on yourself and keep yourself busy.
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