A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hi everyone, i've been speaking to thisgirl on facebook/tumblr etc. for a few months now and we met up once with her friends. then we organised to meet but the day before she stopped talking to me and we didn't end up going out. then she started talking again a few days later like nothing happened and we arranged to meet up again and talk as she's had a tough time of late but we didn't meet up as she went quiet again. we have been speaking again a day or two after and i asked her about it cause i wanted to understand.she told me that she wants to talk to me because i'm nice she said but she then doesn't want to because she doesn't want to get close t anyone again i think its cause she doesn't want to get hurt and at the end she put "i tried" she hasn'treplied to me yet as i did ask her what she meant y that "i tried" i like this girl and i'm not like other guys i'm actually a guy who wants a relationship and just treat her right. how do i try and make this work? and what should I say to her in the next message I send to her if she doesn't reply? p.s she hasn't said that she likes or dislikes me in that way
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female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (27 October 2012):
 She doesn't like you in that way. If a girl liked you in that way she'd do whatever it takes to get to see you. You already gave her several chances to meet, and she "went quiet". If she was interested in you she'd not just leave you hanging, she'd be in touch, say sorry that she couldn't make it and actually have a good reasons for it. She'd not just disappear and not tell you whats going on. This girl has avoided meeting up with you, because she doesn't want to meet up with you. Her "disappearing" acts right before you are to meet up is proof of this.
No need to ask her, I'm telling you right now she's not into you like that. Maybe she just likes talking to you, but nothing more. If she was interested in you and liked you like that then it wouldn't matter if she's been "hurt in the past". Hearts heal, people move on, but they only move on when they meet a person who they feel something special for. And you're not that guy.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks for your answers she hasn't replied and i want to leave her to think but i want to know if she likes me in that way as if he doesn't i can focus on someone else do i just come out and ask her or just wait? thanks
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A
female
reader, chigirl +, writes (26 October 2012):
Answer to headline question: you find a single girl that you like and you flirt with her. Answer to your full-lenght question: Facebook-girl isn't that interested, you need to move on. She's not trying to not get hurt again, she's just trying to not hurt YOU. It is obvious you like her, and that's a good thing, if you want to land a girlfriend you need to make it obvious that you like someone. Because of this openess and obvious interest she is now also able to reject your advances without actually saying so, making things flow more smoothly. She knows you want to meet up, but she's telling you she's not interested in you in that way. This is a girls way of saying "Thanks, but no thanks". Move on to the next girl, this one aint gonna bite.
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A
male
reader, kenny + ♥, writes (26 October 2012):
 Sounds like she is going through a bit of a rough patch at the moment, she has obviously been hurt or let down in a previous relationship and is finding hard to put her trust back into someone.
I think that the worse thing that you can do is bombard her with texts and calls. I think that you should give her some space, maybe a couple of weeks and let her reply to you in her own time when she is ready, i feel if you do this she will apreciate it.
Good luck
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