A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:Im so confused about my ldr boyfriend. Weve been together for almost a year. It hasnt been a great time, certain trust issues and a few arguments. However, I fell in love with him hard. I bent over backwards to make it work. In September I fell pregnant which was a huge surprise for us both because I had the IUD fitted. We decided to keep the baby but unfortunately on the removal of the IUD (at 8 weeks) I miscarried. It totally broke my heart. However, it seemed to have changed my boyfriend. He suddenly became more attentive, more thoughtful and affectionate towards me. We decided that we would try again for another baby. He went away on a training course for 4 weeks but phoned me all the time, and made every effort to keep in touch with me. Now hes back at his base (which is like 300 miles away from me) and he seems to have changed overnight. Ive had no text, no phone call, nothing at all from him over the past couple of days. I sent him a message on facebook earlier, and he just sent a really quick two worded reply back. When we last spoke on the phone 2 nights ago, he mentioned that he was going on another training course in canada in january for 2 months. I just feel like something has changed, I dont know maybe its an instinct. Its just a gut feeling that he has changed his mind about trying for another baby. As much as I just wanna pick up the phone and ask him whats wrong, I dont want to appear needy or obsessive. But I dont want to be given the cold shoulder like this either. Like I said, he has told me he is going abroad for a while soon. I dont know if this could be the reason for him changing his mind so suddenly? If he has changed his mind, I will be gutted absolutely devastated. What should I do? Just sit and wait it out and see what happens? Or chase him for answers? Its driving me nuts just waiting for a text or a call from him all day. Thanks in advance for any advice.
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (29 November 2011):
 first of all I am sorry for the loss of your baby. even with an unplanned pregnancy a loss is tragic.
have you always been LDR or was it just because he's in training?
you have been together less than a year...I am not sure of your age but I personally think that planning a baby with someone you do not live with (and to be honest are not married to) is insanity.
will you always wonder where he is, why isn't he calling you or texting you?
How strong of a relationship is this, if you can't even call him and find out what's going on? Do you always feel like you have to walk on eggs for this man?
why, if you were fitted for an IUD and did NOT want to be pregnant, is now it's OK to be pregnant.. with a man you don't really know... don't really feel secure with, don't feel you can be yourself with?
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