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I don't think I can hide my feelings for my step brother much more. We are not blood related. What can I do?

Tagged as: Crushes, Family, Health, Social Media, Teenage, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (31 July 2016) 3 Answers - (Newest, 16 August 2016)
A female Italy age 16-17, *ellarandom writes:

When I was 8 years old my parents divorced. Me and my sister decided to live with my mum.

My dad met his ex girlfriend and they fell in love again, when I was 9 she introduced us to her children. Lets call them N (he is 11 now) W (he is 17 now) and M (she is 19 now) we only saw them every other weekend.

When I was 10 my dad and his girlfriend had a child together and after a few months she moved house because her ex husband had to give her the old house and he had to pay the mortgage and after that we only saw them a few times a month.

4 years ago me and my sister moved to Italy with my mum and we only saw my dad at summer and Easter/ Christmas after a year my sister decided to move back of england and live with my dad.

My dad and his girlfriend havent got married yet they have been saying for years that by the end of that year they'd get married but they havnt yet...

Last summer I started to have feelings for my step brother W but I pushed those thoughts aside because at the time they weren't that strong.

A few months ago my mum didnt want me to visit them because im ill (im anemic, i lack vitamin d and i have a kidney stone) and she wants to make sure i take my meds and she wants to control me but my dad managed to convince her to let me visit.

I can't wait to see my family (mainly W) because I last saw them at Christmas and that feels like forever ago. When I saw them at Christmas my feelings for W became so strong that I couldn't ignore the anymore. .

I'm going to see him in 2 days and i dont know what to do. I dont think i can hide these feelings for longer but i dont want to make things awkward.

The other day my sister said "W won't have kids because who would date him? You wont have kids either because you dont like guys" and i had to resist to shout at her.

What should I do? I don't want to make things awkward but its painful to hide my feelings...

He is really nice to me and sometimes we chat on facebook about random stuff... Sorry for writing so much but I don't know any other way to explain stuff :/

Btw I'm 15 now

View related questions: christmas, divorce, ex girlfriend, facebook, fell in love, her ex, his ex

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland + , writes (16 August 2016):

aunt honesty agony auntI can understand that you have a crush, but you need to realize that you cannot act on this crush, it would hurt a lot of people including you a lot if you told people about this crush. I know at the moment he is all you can think about and all that you want but Sweetie your hormones are playing up at the moment, they will settle down as you get older, and you will meet other boys that you have a crush on. So the best thing for you to do is try and forget about your crush with W. I know that it will be hard and you will be sad, but you will be much happier in the long run not tearing your family apart.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2016):

I think that you should let these feelings go for your step brother. Even though your dad isn't married to your stepmother yet they are still blending her family with yours. There are many other guys in the world that you are going to meet. And dating your step brother would not be appropriate. Think of him as a great friend and wait until you find that special guy for you.

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A female reader, Andie's Thoughts United Kingdom + , writes (1 August 2016):

Andie's Thoughts agony auntI know you're not related by blood and don't really view him as a brother because you weren't raised together, but that's essentially what he is.

Everyone gets crushes and it's common to get them on inappropriate people, but you have to be mature about it and not act on them. Fuelling them by thinking about him will only make it worse and harder to get rid of.

Don't spend time alone with him, don't go anywhere privately where your mind can overanalyse things he says/does, keep the conversations and actions the same way you would with your sister, etc.

It may be difficult, but it's not worth making a problem between your family and your dad's newer additions to your family.

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