A
male
age
41-50,
* am batman
writes:First off thanks for reading, i know it's quite long but today this has really gotten to me and i don't know what to think, hence why i am turning to you lovely people :)I have been working for a small but successful company for the past 4 years. It used to be really fun and i loved it - they brought me on as a new business person and said i would make meetings for the owners to go and win new clients. It was phone based but they said if i proved myself i could come to meetings.4 years later and i am still on the phone. I have gotten some very good clients and made the company good money over the 4 years, about 300 grand's worth of deals. I am 30 now and still on the same money as when i started. It is a Jewish company and i am not Jewish. I am very good at my job, i have always worked in sales.I have asked time and time again to let me come to meetings and trade fairs as i get so bored just making calls all day but they say no. In my last job i was meeting clients.They hired a new employee a year ago who is a son of a friend and he was meant to be doing the same job as me, but he got a laptop and gets to go to all the meetings and fairs and all the fun stuff. We are the same age.They also hired a new office manager ( again, a friend of theirs) and he is awful. Most days he seems to have a problem with me. He seems to single me out for some reason. Yesterday i took half a day's holiday as i had to take my girlfriend to our baby scan. I came back to the office 10 minutes late ( 1.30pm rather than 1.15pm) and the manager shouted at me.About 4 pm i ran down to get some grapes with my collegue as i hadn't eaten and on the way back up the stairs i bumped into the manager. He had a go at me again asking why i was going out when i had taken half a day off. I said i was just some grapes and i didn't realise it was a prison where we cannot leave.I came into work today and he called me into the office again. He asked why i left at 5.30pm and i said that's closing time. He said i should have stayed late as i was only in half a day. I told him i took half a day's holiday it wasn't like i was late and i cannot make calls after half past 5 as all the companies close. He said that was no excuse.He then said my call quota has to go up from 40 calls a day to 100. I said this was unrealistic but he said he didn't understand why i was trying to talk myself out of a job. what??He then had the cheek to ask me to download some films for him, after talking to me like this.This is just awful. I am the only one who gets treated like this. I am looking for another job but what can i do in the meantime?Is this bad behaviour on their part or am i being silly? Other employees have noticed how i am treated too. Any advice or experience would be great. It's just getting me down. thank you
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2012): I m sure everyone at one point in their life were in a situation like this.
A company who doesnt appreciate and dont promote their good employees is the one thats loosing. What you described is an obvious failing supervision work. Your immediate boss is an ass, he is a bad boss, i had one of those.
She was trying to make me leave also by telling me gossips from other people who said what about me. One day i told her if she doesnt stop doing it, i ll go to upper management and complain on her.
You asked for promotion, they refuse, they started treating you badly, they are hiring friends and relatives, you see where its going.you have a baby on a way, look for another job, but try not to leave, as you wont get any compensation. In some cases if you prove with letters from your coworkers that they created hostile environment for you you can still get unemployment.Good luck!
A
female
reader, maverick494  +, writes (16 August 2012):
This happened to my dad after 19 years of loyalty to the company he worked at. They had to downsize and instead of paying him to leave they tried to make work conditions so bad he would quit his job by himself. The problem when you do that is that you end up without a dime. So he stayed put, ignored everything until they fired him and he got a good sum of money out of it through court. So build an archive full of facts and dates like others have said, get legal advice and don't let them bully you out of there.
If people behave nastily, ignore them or simply smile at them. Yes, that sounds contradictory, but it's very hard for most people to keep putting up bad behavior towards someone who gives nothing but kindness in return. Don't give them any ammunition against you through snappy comebacks or anything like that. If they are particularly difficult, look through them instead of at them, as if they do not exist and not worthy of acknowledgement.
Good luck OP, be sensible.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2012): You are a high producer and are seen as a threat to this new manager.
Asking you to go from 40 calls to 100 calls a day and to meet that new quota is unrealistic as you told him. BUT that is their game plan. He wants to make it as miserable as possible for you at work so that you do quit instead of them firing you.
I've been in a similar situation where I was ganged up on by a group of women who had it in for me. They made my job hell until I requested a transfer to another department (it was a long three months for me to wait). I took a huge hit in the paycheck, but I did not care at that point. I was ready to go to a fast food joint and flip burgers if that is what it took to get out of that situation. It got so bad that I had a bucket by my bed because I was stressed to the point of wanting to throw up and not getting any sleep.
You can go the Human Resources Department if you like, but what I have learned is that it is in their best interest to protect the company from lawsuits. They are on the side of the company and not the employee unless there is substantial evidence to support your claim, which I had and they fired the head jerk that came after me. Others had gone to the HR before and all that did was get them laid off. I just had evidence in my favor and I could have gone to the courts, but I needed the health insurance badly at that point in my life and I was with the company for years and had a pension built up so I didn't make waves and I was lucky enough to move to another department.
So don't always trust HR. In fact a marketing rep at the company was told by HR to make a man's life miserable so that he would indeed quit his job. They were instructed to do so.
I would go under the radar at this point and just do your job (stay low), but start actively looking for another job as soon as possible. Good luck to you!
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A
female
reader, Ciar  + ♥, writes (16 August 2012):
 Your troubles with the company pre-date this manager so I second Honeypie's advice to update your resume and start looking for another job. It certainly wouldn't hurt your case to scan (or photocopy) any letters of praise from clients, obviously without anyone knowing what you're doing.See if you can get a copy of your employee file. Here, it's an employee's right to have a copy if they ask. Stop asking for promotions and don't expect anything beyond a paycheque from them. Be cordial, professional, and do what you're paid to do. Exchange pleasantries only with those who are pleasant to you, but don't give anyone cause for complaint. You did decline to download those movies, right?
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (16 August 2012):
 Rework your resume me and start looking for another job. This is pure misery. Since it's a small (family I guess) run company nothing will change. It COULD be that they are trying to make you leave, since they hired the new guy (who is a relative) instead of firing you.
When you went for the interview and got your job, did you sign a contract? Did it state in the contract What your job would be? And what you would be doing? Pay raise and so forth?
Are you in a workers union or anything? If so you can go that route if they are not fulfilling THEIR end, however... it can drag out and end up not help you at all.
If it was me.. I'd take the high road. They are going to be SUCKING when you leave. Know that you did your job and then some, THEY are not living up to their part.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2012): They could be attempting constructive dismissal, I think that's what it's called? But something very similar happened to a family friend, their manager made life at work hell by raising targets for them alone, even some weeks giving them no work then having a go at them it was really nasty. They were aiming to make work so miserable that the person would leave. My friend went to a union and took the company to court. It turned out they were needing to reduce workforce due to dwindling income but instead of making redundancies they decided they didn't want to pay people to leave and forced them to instead.
Just rise above it as best as possible, I would try finding independent advice on your rights etc... as in particular the instance where you used leave to have a morning off and the manager then asking you to stay late is unacceptable.
Best of luck
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2012): You mention at the end that other employees noticed the same things as you so i'm assuming that the harassment is only coming from your manager. Like the first user is mentioning, try to document the harassment things that manager is doing in case you need it in the future. However about talking with a superior manager i would do this with caution as maybe the superior manager + your manager are buddies (especially in a small company) and this can make your condition worse. Indeed the manager could feel threatened by you (as you are also there since 4 years and have proved yourself already to your co-workers) and he is trying to prove that he is "the boss" by being mean or maybe they are trying to make you quit instead of firing you for whatever reason. I really hope that you can find a new job soon, good luck!
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (16 August 2012):
 I agree with Bond Girl.
My fiance had a hard time with his boss at the last job.
He was very young and inexperienced in the managerial department and he was a micro manager and he ended up losing most of his staff... he was a friend of the owner of the company and therefore he didn't have to be good at what he did...
my fiance was laid off in a "reorganization" that applied ONLY to him....
Just be the most professional you can be and I agree if there is an HR department that perhaps you could go to them (or your boss's supervisor if possible) New managers suck usually until they figure out that adults can work without a parental figure...
Can I ask you if you think you are being discriminated against due to your religion since you mentioned the company is a Jewishly held company and you are not Jewish. It sounds to me like you feel that it's an issue.
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A
female
reader, Starlights +, writes (16 August 2012):
 This manager obviously is jealous and its best you get out of this situation by making moves to find yourself a new job.
Its unfair but i know how unrealistic work places can be, is there not a senior manager above him you can ask to meet ?
If you have proofs of his behavior, it can help.
Know its a short term situation; hopefully you will find a new job so this treatment does not last forever!
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A
female
reader, BondGirl72 +, writes (16 August 2012):
 For some reason the new boss is threatened by you. You do good work, but if you do anything independently, he feels like he has to have you under his thumb. Just the many sings of an insecure boss. I've been through this many times. One boss even told me I dressed "unprofessionally at times" when I was the most professionally dressed in the place! I would just keep doing what you've been doing.
In the meantime, if there is a human resources dept or someone higher up that you could talk to, there should be workplace laws in your country that forbid harrassment. I would consider this harrassment if it has happened more than once. If there is someone you can talk to, make sure you document everything so you remember the facts and dates. That way, you can show the information to the higher ups. Don't bet that this will work though. My sister's company kind of does the same thing to her. They promised her a higher paying job and really encouraged her to interview for certain ones. Then they never hire her. She has been in the same job for 10 years and still looking for another one.
I would not worry too much. It is stressful, but this guy is just insecure and has to throw his weight around. Go talk to someone if someone is available. You may want to ask the advice of another co-worker also.
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