A
female
age
30-35,
*moooches0814
writes:My boss at work flirts with me a lot and I know he likes me and I like him. But hes married with a kid. He is not married to the mother of his daughter tho, but he is married. We have made out and fooled around a little. I know that if we went any further, no one would find out because neither of us are that obvioius about it. He flirts with other people at work but not the same way that he does with me. I am 18 and he is 35. I dont want a relationship and neither does he. So I dont think it would be a problem since neither of us would be getting attatched. I really want to go further with him but Im not absolutely sure. Please give me some advise on what I should do. Thanx!
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female
reader, heartBEAT  +, writes (12 June 2008):
Hi!I have the seam situation!I'm 20 yrs,my boss is 35-married..have 2 wonderfull kids but ugly wife:),we work 2gether 1 year,and he flirts with me also,sometimes after work time we get drunk and we dance we do some erotics things but never kissed or have sex..i like him and he likes me...he told me that he is stupid maybe that he married so yang (btw he married because his wife was so poor)and the life for he just begin..I think that the world now is not so seriuos so..everybody needs some fun..If u like him so much DO somtehing..but u must know that what u'll do will be short...it can't be for long time remeber that' only fun who you can't put on your heart..p.s Maybe and I will take a little fun with my boss
A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (29 September 2007):
 Are you that selfish. He's married so NO! He has a child so NO! He's your boss so NO!
A plausible situation if one person finds out. He losses his job, he looses his child (adultery is grounds for a custody change), He looses his wife. And for what, a little bit of fun. I don't know about you, but what there is to loose greatly outweighs having some sexual fun. Not worth it
I was a manager for over 12 years, and if a rumor came by my desk about sex with your boss. Don't need the drama, you'd have to somewhere else to apply, because I wouldn't want you working there with that irresponsible background.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 September 2007): I truly cannot believe some of the response on here, by people trying to justify their sordid little affairs, even the ones that have given answers!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sleeping with a married person is WRONG, no excuses, no validations of "oh, it's complicated". They are not available. If they are having problems in their marriage, then they need to either sort them or leave their partners, so they are NOT married and are available for a relationship. I believe in karma and treating people how you want to be treated. For all you people out there who think it's acceptable and have acted on it, I hope you get incredibly hurt when karmic pay back time pays a visit. If you have any sort of conscious at all, then do not do it. And for those of you that say "go for it!", a very sad life for you.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 September 2007): you have issues...
go for it miss drama queen.
/sarcasm
p.s. enjoy being a homewrecker too
and you are naive to think people will not find out. you are 18, that is some major bragging for him to pull that. word will get around eventually and also if they do you and him will mess up your job.
i wasnt lying when i said you have issues...
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A
female
reader, bemused  +, writes (28 September 2007):
 I read some of the responses here. I am not going to judge anyone because I almost started an affair with a married man too. I do think though that the statistics speak for themselves. For everyone one of these situations that works and yes..some do on occasion there are many more that end in pain and disillusionment. Frequently it is the single person in the equation who is stygmatized and ridiculed but it is usually the single person who is hurt. If you can keep a rein on your emotions that is fine but that is stressful too. I do not look at it as a moral issue but it is a situation where someone gets hurt most of the time. Are you attracted to him because he seems settled and stable...in contrast to some of the flighty guys your own age. I am not going to say to give it up but I would say proceed with caution so that you do not join the millions of people who have been hurt because they had an affair with someone who was married.
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A
female
reader, smoooches0814 +, writes (27 September 2007):
smoooches0814 is verified as being by the original poster of the question I appreciate your honest opinion, thank you.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (27 September 2007):
 Don't bet on not getting caught. Think about his wife and child. Why would you want to hurt them? What happens if you do get attached to him, there's nothing but heartache for you. The whole idea is smarmy. Stop the nonsense and find somebody single you can have fun with and STILL be a class act.
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A
female
reader, leanne.od  +, writes (27 September 2007):
 so many people are going to disagree with me but...
i say go for it. i don't care what anybody says, it can work. it did for me. i was exactly your age when i had an affair with a married man at work who was 35. things for us haven't ended and we're still seeing each other, i know the bounderies and where i stand, which work for me and him just fine.
before i start getting lectures, our story is long and complicted and altough it is wrong, there are justifyable reasons for everything.
i say go with it, have fun but don't fall for him and just make sure you have lines that aren't crossed so you know where you stand.
(and please don't ridicul my advice - i'm only talking from experiance and giving my opinion)
good luck!!!
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