A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I fell in love with this guy I know he had feelings for me We used to work together he's extremely popular and everyone likes himplease don't judge but we got close and kissed he's been living with a girl for 6 years and he said after we kissed that it was wrong and I felt bad too but by this point I had deep feelings for himHe's now split with the girl but they're selling the house but are still living together for financial reasons til they sellAnyway we stopped talking last November after a huge row I was sick of the mixed signals he was giving me and a lit of my friends said he led me onWe were close friends before all of this yet we spoke briefly once when he wished me a happy birthday in feb 2 weeks after my actual birthdayFrom the row last year he told me to leave him alone and I can't go near himWe haven't spoke in all that time And if he sees me he ignores meWhen we had the row last year he told me I had pushed him away and he had list the feelings for me yet I overreacted many times due to the mixed signals he kept givingHe still talks to everyone we used to work with except me - I feel like a leperSo I don't know if he will ever acknowledge me again since its been almost 6 months with only one small contact Please help ;(
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (5 May 2014):
 You fell in love with him. Or so you say.
You know he has feelings for you… really HOW do you know this.. see the feelings he has for you may not be the same feelings you have for him.
You say EVERYONE likes him… at least that’s how it appears to you…
You say “please don’t judge” so you know that your kissing him was not a good thing. If he kissed YOU while he was with another partner you know him to be a liar and a cheater right?
So you are here to ask us to help you figure out why you love a liar and a cheater right?
You had a fight and he told you to leave him alone and he ignores you… so it’s pretty obvious he used you to help him figure out how to get away from his current GF and that he is NOT interested in you in any way shape or form.. not as a lover or a friend….
You ask for help.
What do you want help with? Help with coping with the loss of an imaginary relationship that you hoped would happen and is not? That’s easy… just know he’s not the one for you and let it go and move on. IF you have to find a new job, do it.
Help with getting him back to you? NOT GOING TO HAPPEN… he’s not interested in having anything with you and if he is, it will be just to scratch an itch he has and then toss you aside yet again.
Going totally NOT contact with this guy is in your best interest.
A
male
reader, Mark1978  +, writes (4 May 2014):
 "he's extremely popular and everyone likes him"Everyone loves my brother, thinks he is amazing and everywhere I go people stop me in the street to gush about how proud I must be to have such an incredible "sensitive" brother...Erm no actually. He is a user, a liar, a selfish, ignorant bastard that uses people, turns on fake charm to get what he wants and cheats on every girl he beds (and they all want to bed him) and treats my parents like dirt. Other people see his public image...his looks, his designer clothes, his charm, his panache....he impresses impressionable women with his promises and bull shit. Just because someone is popular and well liked doesn't mean they are a nice person. Forget this loser and move on. He clearly kissed you and gave you positive signals when his relationship hit the rocks to make himself feel better. Now you are surplus to his requirement. He is a user and not a nice person. You say you were in love with him, but you were in love with the person he projected. In love with his act if you like. He is not the person you, and his collegues, think he is so please move on and find someone single, special and who returns your feelings. Best of luck.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (4 May 2014):
 I suggest you woman up and take of those rose colored glasses. THIS is NOT a good guy.
HE used you. He was unhappy in his relationship and kissed you.
HE isn't interested in you. Or at least not interested in treating you like a decent person should.
WHY chase after him? There are without doubt MANY better guys out there.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 May 2014): Yeah, he's REALLY not a nice guy... Would you treat someone the way he's treated you? I'm guessing no! He has NO conscience, and WHY would you want to WASTE another minute on this creep??
You're under the influence of your feelings, and hanging on the string he's trying to keep you on, so breaking it off with him WILL be difficult, it always is but you need to snap out of it! He likes to dangle you for his own satisfaction, whatever little ego boost he's getting, it's NOT the way to treat people.
We've all got insecurities but cruel people show their true colours through inflicting pain onto others.
You need to cut contact... Or else mug yourself off for this piece of tat! Take care x
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A
female
reader, Intrigued3000  +, writes (3 May 2014):
 You were right to get angry with him about his mixed signals. Actions speak louder than words. He treats you like a leper, told you to leave him alone, and not surprisingly, he sends mixed signals again by wishing you happy birthday. He is not a nice person. He is treating you like crap. Consider the birthday wish just a polite gesture, and even if it was meant as more than just a gesture, it's still a crappy way to treat you. Bottom line is that he is not treating you very well. Take off the rose tinted glasses. He is not a nice person. He does not treat you very well. Toss him in the garbage. Start dating other people. You'll find someone better.
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