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... Send *abey a private message | | | *abey's profile:Im a 37year old nurse. Who has been through realtionships. Aswell as a marriage. I am no more qualified than anyone to help with problems, but if a few of my words can comfort someone and help them a little, then that makes my day. WE all need to share when we have a worry or concern, I need that too.
I am in afairly new relationship, hope that I can get it right this time. Probably with the help from people on this site.
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I'm 15 and my breasts feel a bit tender and bruised, is this normal?
Q. im 15 and I've noticed recently that my breast are feeling a bit tender almost like bruised at the sides near my arms.im not particularly big, a/b cup size. I no im definatly not pregnant or anything is this normal? ...
A. 20 February 2007: Yes this is perfectly normal at varying times of the month.
Often women get very tender breasts when they are pre menstrual it is one of the many symptoms of pre menstrual tension. It is nothing to worry about and perfectly normal. Some months may ... (read in full...)
Would you date a girl who told you she was forced to do oral sex even although she didn't want to?
Q. I have an open question for everyone, Would you date a girl who had told you that she was forced to do oral sex even although she didn`t want to have sex with the guy? How would you know if it was the truth she is telling or if she did it ...
A. 20 February 2007: I presume that in all cases we have to believe and trust in people, until they give us reason to believe otherwise.
I think this would be a strange thing to lie about, and therefore is probably the truth.
You dont know if its the ... (read in full...)
I hoped she'd grow on me. Five years later though, I still haven't found much in her... !
Q. My girlfriend is talented, bright, caring, hard working, very successful and always seems to be on top of things. We've been together five years. I haven't fallen in love with her however. She ticks a lot of the right boxes and we share many ...
A. 8 February 2007: I think to be happy you have to know you are in love. Gosh there are thousands of people who would tick all your boxes, but if you dont desire them or love them that would leave such an empty space, in my mind. To me true love is loving someone ... (read in full...)
If he doesn't want a relationship then where is this going???
Q. Hi, I need some advice, I started off sleeping with one of my housemates, though before this we started off with a few kisses, none of the housemates or our friends ever knew anything about, but everyone said they thought he liked me, and that we ...
A. 8 February 2007: I think you have two choices... One just carry on having fun with him for the time being with no pressure or talk of a relationship. Because the more time you spend with him the closere he will become to you and there will be more memories for him, ... (read in full...)
Are saying loving words really important for guys to hear? Any thoughts?
Q. i confronted my bf of not calling me honey again, he told me that he chooses not to coz of what he had saw at the past when he snooped my cellphone and found out the text of my ex in another languange he thought that one of the words in theyre ...
A. 8 February 2007: I think yes to some men they do like to hear terms of endearment. And often us as women expect things to be said to us all the time, but forget men want to be loved and nutured and told to, its an equal world.
So carry on telling him you love... (read in full...)
My ex gf respects my feelings and won't date this guy. Am I being fair to her and him?
Q. Hi, Apologies for a long question. I am a 19 year old guy. Five years ago I met a girl and we dated for a few months, then broke up and became best friends. We have both had other relationships since, but remained very good friends throu...
A. 8 February 2007: I think you are all being very mature and respectful of each others feelings, that is lovely to hear, as these days people often seem to have so much disrepect for each other.
I think you are ok to have all these feelings and it must be very... (read in full...)
Is it normal that I like him to control me during sex?
Q. Is it normal that I like him to control me during intercourse? He's very dominant and tells me what do do and I like it! Is this normal? It never leaves the bedroom, but still......
A. 7 February 2007: I think this is very normal, think it goes back to our original roots. The caveman, cavewomen times. We women like to be the softer caring role, and see the man as the strong domineering hunter. In life today our roles as men and women have become ... (read in full...)
I'm stuck debating if he's just stressing like last time, or is cheating on me so he has to pick a fight this way to end it...
Q. I need to know what is going on with my relationship. I have been with this guy for a little over a year, well after some miscommunication it's a little less. We are "taking it slow". In saying that i don't mean we don't have sex. Slow (and I was ...
A. 7 February 2007: Gosh, sadly sounds like in this relationship there is a lot of mistrust, and really a good relationship should be based on trusting each other. It does not sound as though he is cheating on you, because in my opion, rather than pick a fight and ... (read in full...)
I flirted with her and feel I should have asked her out, Would it be too late now ??
Q. I have recently enroled at a recruitment agency when I got interviewed by the girl there I found myself flirting toyed with the idea of just going in and asking out for a drink but the moment might have been lost and she may have forgot me what ...
A. 6 February 2007: Right, go back to the agency, if you know her name ask to speak with her. Tell her she recently interviewed you and you were wondering would she fancy going out for a drink sometime. She will first and foremost be most flattered, we always are us ... (read in full...)
Im feeling very insecure about my BF going away Incase he ends up at a strip club!!!
Q. Tell me if I am over reacting! My bf (of 10 months) has to travel across country for a business trip soon and I am terrified that he will be convinced by his co-worker, who is going with him, to go to a strip club while he is away. What ma...
A. 6 February 2007: bless you, I can tell this is eating you up inside. You have your beleifs and thats ok. Now I think your boyfriend is most probable going to respect your feelings and definately not go, so I think you need not worry. You ask if you are being as you ... (read in full...)
Am I just too young to understand?
Q. Everytime I read the posts on this site I find it really hard to understand why people decide that they don't want to be with someone else? Am I just too young to understand as I have had only one proper relationship. Why can't people just compromi...
A. 6 February 2007: You are right not everyone is completely compatible. And as you have already observed, there are many reasons why people move on from relaionships. The world we live in today offers us so many choices. And most of us use this to bring happiness into ... (read in full...)
Help... Who Should I Choose?
Q. What should i do? I've been with someone for 4yrs, recently I have gotten very close with his brother and i feel as though i have feelings for him and really dont know what to do? ...
A. 6 February 2007: This is a difficult one, you poor thing. Have you started a relationship with the brother ? are you spending more time with him? Its a little difficult to reply as I could do with more detail. Quite often when we have been in a relationship with ... (read in full...)
My best friend is a girl... but people think we're an item!
Q. My best friend is a girl, and we get along real well and are perfect for one another emotionally, but physically, I'm not at all attracted to her. But when we're in public together we look like a couple because we're so close. We're not affec...
A. 6 February 2007: why,if you two are just good friends would it be disrepectful to look at other women. When I am out with a good male friend, we will eye up the opposite sex for each other. Also I think we give of the vibes we are just mates.
The thing is do y... (read in full...)
Need tips on how to get over my ex...
Q. I dated this girl for about 2 months until she said she wanted to break up with me. I was so depressed I didnt really know how to handle it so I called her a B**** which I apologized for. Bad move on my part but even know we have been apart for 3 ...
A. 4 February 2007: give it one last try and see if she wants you back. If the answer is no, then time to be very brave and strong. There must be things in life you really enjoy doing. Well keep doing them, hang out with your mates the ones that are fun and positive, ... (read in full...)
He wants to "eat me out" but I'm scared that I smell bad!
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year now and he wants to finally "eat me out". I also want him too, but I am really scared that my vagina smells to bad. I wash and clean like every other woman, but I don't understand why it does! Please ...
A. 4 February 2007: what women dont always realise is that men actually love the natural smell of a woman, they dont always want to smell perfume and deodrants. Its all about animal instinct. They love the taste and smell of our natural odour, so promis you girl you ... (read in full...)
Should I bite my tongue or should I open up to him and tell him how I feel?
Q. I am female in my 40's and have been seeing a guy who is 32 for the past 6 months. (We have known each other over 10 years) We have been best friends for several years and became intimate with each other last year. We spend a lot of time together...
A. 4 February 2007: Im sorry, Im a woman answering this. But hope I can help.
YOu have been intimate with him you say, well that proves there must be an attraction, thats a good start.You get on well and spend lots of time together, thats another good thing. So I... (read in full...)
I'm scared if I try to hold her hand she'll pull away... then everyone will be embarrased!
Q. i reli lyk dis gurl. she told me on dat she wud luv to get flowers n a card on valentines day as she never has b4. cud this be a hint 4 me? shes reli busy so we never get to meet. ive asked to go movies wid her n she said ye but durin holidays ...
A. 4 February 2007: from what you are saying its sounds as though she has an interest in you. Us women do make hints about flowers often to men we wish to receive them from. And she has agreed to go out with you all positive signs. So I would not worry make your move ... (read in full...)
How can we stop this fighting and love eachother in peace and happiness like the other couples around us?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been through so much for almost two years, and we love eachother SO much. It started out when I was going through emotional hell, I am now I have come a long way. I'm now a much more happy, independant person. He has come a ...
A. 4 February 2007: Firstly you really must keep working on yourself. You sound like you are doing that thats great. I know its a cliche, but its true. You must love yourself before anyone can love you. Sometimes its hard to be with someone if you have to continually ... (read in full...)
Is it normal to have these imaginary flirtings in your head?
Q. Is it normal when nobody is around except you and to like pretend there are people and talk and stuff ..in your head or out loud. Like, you can even look over and imagine they are there. Today i kinda did that and kind of imagined hanging out with ...
A. 4 February 2007: i think its probably best not to tell him this. Its always ok to have a good imagination, and fantasise about anything really. I must admit what you do does sound a little unusual, but we all have our different ways. Maybe this makes you feel more ... (read in full...)
I'm confused by my ex's reaction to my thoughts on the break up. What does his phone call mean?
Q. Okay, my man broke up with me around 2-3 months ago. I was going through some bad times and it freaked him out. He said that he doesn't know what happened, that he just wanted it to end. Anyways, we talked the other day about the break up (ran ...
A. 29 January 2007: think it means something. By seeing you and talking to you, it provoked him into some thought. And good that you werent around to answer his call. I expect in a few days if not less he will contact you again. If you want him back, and he is worth ... (read in full...)
How can I fix my marriage?
Q. My marriage of 8 years has gone to crap. My great wife said that she can't take anymore and wants me out. We have two kids that i love very much. I am the cause of this whole mess and will do anything to fix it. Have going to doctor and ...
A. 28 January 2007: its very difficult to comment without too much detail. What is it that your wife cant take much more of ? And why would she think you are still in love with your ex? Have you been showing her lots of love? without all these details its hard to ... (read in full...)
He fingered me..can I get pregnant?
Q. Dear ANYBODY, I'm really freaked out i am in the prosses fo moving and me and my boyfriend of 8 months new we both wanted to have sex with each other before i left to a city hours away. The whole sex thing was a safe as can be (painful 2) condom i...
A. 28 January 2007: Yes pretty impossible for you to be pregnant so do not worry. Sounds like you are being very sensible and cautious, keep that up. ... (read in full...)
He wants me to wait until his problems are sorted out...do I wait or just move on?
Q. Hello, I am haveing some problems with my relationship I need someones advice...I am very much in love with someone right now we have been talken for almost a yr and we feel the same about each other except we both have a lot of stuff going on ...
A. 28 January 2007: gosh, this is a tricky one, he wants you to give him space but then wont let you go out and have fun. That sounds pretty unfair to me !. Time for you to be a brave girl, i suggest you tell him again how much you love him and want to be with him. But ... (read in full...)
I told her I wanted marriage-she went cool and broke off with me! I want her back...advice please?
Q. How can I win her back? I've been going out with this girl for almost 7 years, then out of the blue she broke up with me. She stated that she loves me, she can’t marry me and that I should find someone better then her. I stated that I’m old enough t...
A. 27 January 2007: I think no dont send anything in February. YOu have to carry on with the space. I know many of my friends who have split up with their man and then if he has not contacted them or sent anything nice or made contact it really makes them sit up and ... (read in full...)
We're planning to get married but he doesn't seem to desire me sex-wise...
Q. Hi My boyfriend and I have been together for about a year now and plan to be married August of this year. We are both 34 years old. I work mostly days and him nights. We get along well for the most part. The main problem is sex actually. I want to ...
A. 26 January 2007: is he a similar age to you ? the thing is women often reach their sexual peak in their thirties and do feel like sex often. Men reach their sexual peak when they are alot younger. Some men still want loads of sex as they get older, but other men ... (read in full...)
How can I go from A to B?
Q. i like this girl right..lets name her A.. ok ive gone out with her for the past month or so. i really liked her. i mean REALLY really, loved her she seemd like the perfect person. Unfortunatly there is this other girl..named B..haha i got to know ...
A. 26 January 2007: yes time to be straight and honest with miss A, you must try not to worry about what everyone will think goodness Im sure everyone will understand, we have all ben their. its lovely that you care so much about everyones feelings. But sometimes we ... (read in full...)
I'm still in love w/ my ex - but he's talking w/ my mate! What do I do?
Q. right so this is kinda complicated but it's doing my head in. I USED to go out with this guy called Robert* and we've started getting close again, but he's talking to my mate Angela* and I found out they've been talking for ages now. It really p...
A. 26 January 2007: Did he end the relationship with you ? its difficult to comment without all the details. I think you should just carry on and maintain your friendship with him, be cool, happy and lovely. He obviously liked you a lot and prob still does. Im afraid ... (read in full...)
How can i tell if my gf is faking it??
Q. Hi I've been seeing a girl for a few months now and have been enjoying a mutually very fulfilling sex life with her. Then, one day she told me that she used to fake orgasms with previous partners and regarded herself as a pretty good faker. I asked ...
A. 26 January 2007: sometimes it just does not happen, for no fault of you as a man. Someitme I orgasm easily othertimes its harder, just dont know why. And when my boyfriend is trying really hard to please me and make me come, and i know its just not going to happen ... (read in full...)
I asked for more of a committment...now I don't see him that often. What's up with this guy?
Q. my boyfriend finished with me just before xmas, we had been seeing each other for eight months. I was gutted but accepted it and tried to carry on with my life. Well he kept asking to meet up and everytime we did we acted as boyfriend and ...
A. 26 January 2007: thankyou for your replies. I think i do need to relax. I have three children and when he met me he had only just come out of a relationship with a woman of 6 years who also had her own 2 children. I think really this is the route of his caution. As ... (read in full...)
I asked for more of a committment...now I don't see him that often. What's up with this guy?
Q. my boyfriend finished with me just before xmas, we had been seeing each other for eight months. I was gutted but accepted it and tried to carry on with my life. Well he kept asking to meet up and everytime we did we acted as boyfriend and ...
A. 26 January 2007: thankyou for your replies. I think i do need to relax. I have three children and when he met me he had only just come out of a relationship with a woman of 6 years who also had her own 2 children. I think really this is the route of his caution. As ... (read in full...)
I told her I wanted marriage-she went cool and broke off with me! I want her back...advice please?
Q. How can I win her back? I've been going out with this girl for almost 7 years, then out of the blue she broke up with me. She stated that she loves me, she can’t marry me and that I should find someone better then her. I stated that I’m old enough t...
A. 20 January 2007: i would now not contact her for at least one month. Then after that month of no contact she will hav ehad time to find out if she misses you or not. Then after a month call her and ask to meet for coffe and stress it really is aa a friend. Then when ... (read in full...)
He dumps me, refuses to see me and now...wants back in my life! Any thoughts?
Q. About 5 months ago, I began seeing this guy. We really clicked but looking back, our "relationship" basically amounted to week-end hookups with very little communication in between. I wanted more, but never said anything - just tried to go with ...
A. 18 January 2007: Yes he has obviously missed you and now is trying to persue you again, without the pressure of having to commit. Sounds like thats what is worrying him. I would for a while just go with the flow be cool casual and the best girl ever to hang out ... (read in full...)
Should I move on or stick it out? She said I've broken her heart... "again"
Q. Well last week my girlfriend said that she wanted to go on a break. We will have been dating for three years as of this coming Valentine's day. We have been having some minor relationship problems over the last few months but for the most part it ...
A. 18 January 2007: there are a couple of things here which are slightly unclear. Firstly, do you love her ? secondly what has happened that has caused you to break her heart again.
Right if you really love her and want the relationship to continue then yes call... (read in full...)
Can friends with benefits bring you and your ex back together?
Q. Can friends with benefits bring you and your ex back together? I was just wondering cuz my ex and i are friends with benefits and he doesnt want a gf or a relationship right now. We have been friends for a good while before we started dating t...
A. 11 January 2007: I think sometimes that men suddenly feel committed and trapped when in a relationship. And then by spliting up and then seeing you as a friend and sleeping with you he feels no pressure or commitment.I think there is a good chance you will restore ... (read in full...)
I'm 14 and not confident about my size 34A breasts! What can I do about this?
Q. hi im 13 , 14 in February and i really want to wear tops but im not confident about my breasts. there 34a and i just want to go out with a top and not a jumper to cover up . I would find myself more attractive by not covering up as much. What ...
A. 7 January 2007: Well Im 36 and have 32a breasts and I love them. Take a look at Kate Moss, Kylie Minogue, and all those other sexy gorgeous women who have small breats. Mine wont be hanging by my knees when Im 60 !!!And when I wear litle tops I get a great padded ... (read in full...)
Dated once and sent her a text but she hasn't replied. Any ideas why?
Q. Hi, advice please! Met a great girl on a night out last weekend, kind of a set up by her mates. Anyway, we got on well and spent the evening together. I sent her a text to wish Happy new Year ect and never got a reply, now I'm wondering whethe...
A. 7 January 2007: Yes definately text again. New years eve loads of people dont recieve texts as the system gets so blocked up. I didnt recieve half my texts that night, and loads of people couldnt send any through. You will then know text her again and ask her out ... (read in full...)
How do I fall out of unrequited love?
Q. How do I fall out of (unrequited) love? In October I met a girl on the internet. Something I have never done before. We got on really well and within a couple of weeks we were talking all the time. I mean almost every moment that we were availabl...
A. 7 January 2007: This is a very hard one and no easy answer. Its about re building your inner strength, training your thoughts and your focus. And telling yourself you will not always feel like this. Whenthese things happen it is a really good idea to review your ... (read in full...)
He keeps wanting to see me even though we have broken up. What should I do?
Q. first of all, i want to thank those who answered my question coz i could assure u i took all ur opinions into consideration!!xx now i hav another prob!(surprisingly enough)...i told my bf how i feel about wanting to be single and he didnt take it ...
A. 7 January 2007: Why if you love him do you not want to be with him? Never sure bout that one !! But well that you choose to be on your own for a while tells me you must have doubts bout your relationship with him. So the fairest thing to him would be to tell him ... (read in full...)
Getting really frustrated in my sex life with my partner. I need help and advice!
Q. I'm getting really frustrated in my sex life at the moment. Me and my partner have a good sex life but lately, I'm getting bored. We make love and, although he tries to make it about me too (we have toys and he gives me oral etc), I never come ...
A. 7 January 2007: No you are certainly not asking to much. You are right that not many women come during intercourse and that most need clit stimulation. Also some women do take a while to come that is quite normal to. Reall the only answer is for you come before he ... (read in full...)
He was cheated on by ex-wife but is scared of committing to a relationship. What should I do to help him?
Q. Met a guy who had been cheated on and left by his wife three years ago, he works hard and loves his small children. We began dating, seeing each other every few days, he got to know my son, then out of the blue just before xmas he text me saying h...
A. 4 January 2007: I think the only answer is now to give him space. Dont contact him unless he contacts you. You I presume have laid all the cards on the table told him how you feel etc. If so then this guy knows how you feel. He obviously needs time to really ... (read in full...)
It's hard to get my circumsised bf to cum - any advice?
Q. Hey please help me, my boyfriend and I have been going out 6 months, we're both 15. He is circumcised, so I know it's harder for him to cum. The other weekend I gave him my first blowjob and handjob. I didn't make him cum. Is it possible to make him ...
A. 4 January 2007: As a 36 year old woman, and quite a fair bit of experience in the blow job department, I have found that some men, do take a lot longer in cuming than others. Some seem to cum very easily when given a blow job but I do know other men who take ... (read in full...)
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