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... Send *idda123 a private message | | | *idda123's profile:I really like trying to help people with their problems i have had plenty problems and plenty of help so it's only right i put something back now lol.
I try to take a common sense approach and i always try to answer questions that i may know something about or have experienced in my life so i can give my take on things and hopefully be of some help. |
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What do you think... Is he trying to make me jealous?
Q. I live in a small town where everybody knows each other and there’s not a lot of people your own age. There’s this boy (I’ll pretend his name is Aiden) and he lives on a farm outside a close town. We both go to the same church. There isn’t a good ...
A. 18 February 2009: Well i must say that you do give a very full account of what happened every detail i can really get the picture.
I am sure Aiden likes you but he is finding it difficult to get the words out. Sometimes when you are young your friends try to help ... (read in full...)
What do you think... Is he trying to make me jealous?
Q. I live in a small town where everybody knows each other and there’s not a lot of people your own age. There’s this boy (I’ll pretend his name is Aiden) and he lives on a farm outside a close town. We both go to the same church. There isn’t a good ...
A. 11 February 2009: I replied to this yesterday i don't know why it hasn't been updated.
Anyway i think he is a bit mixed up with his signals you really need to make things clearer to him give him some signs that he can't get wrong.
Just have a word with him an... (read in full...)
What do you think... Is he trying to make me jealous?
Q. I live in a small town where everybody knows each other and there’s not a lot of people your own age. There’s this boy (I’ll pretend his name is Aiden) and he lives on a farm outside a close town. We both go to the same church. There isn’t a good ...
A. 10 February 2009: I think young boys and girls sometimes do this they get their friends to ask on their behalf and i think this is what Aiden has asked Tyler to do.
He has probably being getting a few mixed messages recently what with Crystal and yourself and he i... (read in full...)
Should I be annoyed my wife is discussing our marital problems with her friends.
Q. Should I be annoyed my wife is discussing our marital problems with her friends. Because I am! I know we have problems but I haven't talked to my friends about it, I feel it's private information. What do you think?...
A. 9 February 2009: Its a fact women do talk to their friends about personal things we are unlike men and you can't hold that against us.
FinnmcCool you said opinions are like arseholes everyone got one but we do need them do we not lol you seem to contradi... (read in full...)
My teasing him forced him to force himself on me!
Q. Ok, my husband has been telling me for weeks now that if I keep teasing him the way I do he would make me carry through with it. I never thought he would actually make me do it, but of course I was dumb enough to push him to it. I know you all will ...
A. 9 February 2009: Don't make a big issue out of it is wasn't rape get him to wind you up then roll over and go to sleep see how you like it.
Just have a talk about it and move on unless you want to make a major problem in your marriage!... (read in full...)
Is my voice breaking?
Q. Hello I'm 15 years of age and whenever I speak my voice cuts out, is this a sign of my voice breaking? I have hairs down below and I have enough armpit hair for people to notice but saying that I have little else hair so is this a sign of my voice ...
A. 8 February 2009: Yes i think it sounds like your voice is breaking you have other signs of puberty which confirm this and different people have different varying amounts of hair in different places.
You will probably have friends of the same age who are going th... (read in full...)
My teasing him forced him to force himself on me!
Q. Ok, my husband has been telling me for weeks now that if I keep teasing him the way I do he would make me carry through with it. I never thought he would actually make me do it, but of course I was dumb enough to push him to it. I know you all will ...
A. 8 February 2009: Well it is a bit cruel teasing him then just rolling over and going to sleep.
Personally i would just learn by your mistakes don't make a big issue out of it it wasn't as if it was rape you encouraged him initially and i am sure you love him... (read in full...)
She's not sure if she wants to be in a relationship right now...
Q. Hi, I'm 18 so me and my partner have been jokingly playing around about sex, although I don't know if she's kidding or serious, I have never actually had sex before, but I know I do actually love her and she does as well the only thing is right now ...
A. 8 February 2009: I am sure she likes you but i would just give her sometime and stay friendly as she has asked for the time being and gradually your relationship will grow.
Just let things happen naturally at her pace.
... (read in full...)
Girlfriend thinks I'm cheating what do I do?
Q. My wife thinks I'm cheating on her because I've been refusing sex for about 4 weeks. But that's because I've been feeling like crap lately and quite stress out as well. She keeps asking me straight up if I'm cheating or not and I kept telling her I ...
A. 8 February 2009: I think locking your phone and changing your password is the last thing you want to do unless you are hiding something because that is the impression you would give. I would suggest leaving your phone on and always out in the open which would be a ... (read in full...)
Do you think this shy guy will make a move?
Q. I'm going after a shy guy. At first when I heard he liked me I was like no but now I hope he does eventually ask me out. I like him but if he doesn't ask me then I might move on to others who want me. My birthdays coming up so I hope he does ...
A. 8 February 2009: I think you need to let him know that you really do like him. If he is shy he will be worried about asking you out incase he is rejected so i think if you give him plenty of signals that you won't do that he will be more likely to build up the ... (read in full...)
Husband left me-family knows where he is but won't tell me!
Q. My husband left me 5 months ago.I came home from work and my husband was gone,I haven't heard a word from him.His family knows where he is at but they won't let me contact him.What do I do....
A. 8 February 2009: I know it is not always easy to move on you need time to heal and whatever it takes to get you through this bad time you must do.
I would definately pack all his things up and if you know when he is coming over you can leave his stuff outside ... (read in full...)
Although it sounds like I'm just feeling sorry for myself, I am stuck in this rut. Please can anyone help me?
Q. My problem is that I really hate being alone and feel like life is passing me by. My boyfriend and I broke up 10 months ago and I have been single since. He belittled me and made me feel small and his parting shot was that I was ugly and turned his ...
A. 5 February 2009: I was just reading through your replies and i was thinking to myself that your boyfriend more than likely said those horrible things to you deliberately to rock your self-esteem and make you feel unworthy.
I am sure people do this just as a safety... (read in full...)
Should I wait 5 years for him to leave his wife?
Q. I have been seeing this man for almost three years now. He is perfect. He is kind, caring considerate, attentive, loving, great in the sack the problem is he is married. He has a child from the previous marriage and states he can't leave his new ...
A. 4 February 2009: I am sure your boyfriend does love you but 5 years! i think that is a little unreasonable surely you are not going to continue this sort of life for so long, you are wasting your best years and could settle down with someone who deserves you and ... (read in full...)
Husband left me-family knows where he is but won't tell me!
Q. My husband left me 5 months ago.I came home from work and my husband was gone,I haven't heard a word from him.His family knows where he is at but they won't let me contact him.What do I do....
A. 4 February 2009: Yes thank you for your kind message flowerlady i appreciate your thanks.
I think that the feelings you are having are only natural and they will pass with time though part of your feelings will no doubt be loneliness which can be filled with the... (read in full...)
Open relationship backfired! Can we save our marriage or is it me?
Q. Is my marriage over? I feel so insecure he is with me for the wrong reasons. Here goes, I have been married for 10yrs and with my husband for 13yrs. Our sex life goes through cycles, over 2 years ago it was bad I admit, once every 6 weeks. We tri...
A. 3 February 2009: I think this whole thing has made you feel totally insecure and you are looking to him to help you feel more secure but he does seem a little insensitive inviting a girl back is bad enough but when you have just had your grandad's funeral seems a ... (read in full...)
He didn't text back... Why?
Q. This guy is really confusing me! I've asked a question about him before heres the link http://www.dearcupid.org/question/so-does-he-like-me.html anyway today I decided to text him. I said hey what's up. He text back saying so who is this lol? I t...
A. 3 February 2009: Yes i think you are totally wasting your time on this one he just isn't interested x... (read in full...)
How should an adult relate to teenagers on social networking sites?
Q. I am having a bit of a moral-social dilemma and would like your opinion on it. I am a bi woman who was born in 1982 (I am 26 now) and although I personally still feel like a 22 year old and get on well with people who are 2 or 3 years younger ...
A. 3 February 2009: Interesting view point.
However, i wouldn't say anyone particularly thought it was a good scenario they all thought it best to wait until she was a little older but i can definately see what you mean.
The reason everyone objected to the ... (read in full...)
Does period pain get less as you get older???
Q. Me and my sister get really bad period pain and we just sit around forlike 1 or 2 days and we always know when the other persons got her period, but I never know if moms got hers. I mean she doesn't like lay around all day or anything. I just wan...
A. 2 February 2009: I remember when i was about your age my period pain was very bad i can vividly remember having very bad cramps but i must say that is all in the past and over the years i have had times when i would feel a bit crampy but then for a good while after ... (read in full...)
I cancelled our anniversary to be there for my sister, how to make it up to the husband?
Q. My husband and me were having our year wedding anniversary. Until my sister came crying to me because her boyfriend was cheating on her with her best friend and she broke up with him on the spot. She was really upset about it so I cancelled had our ...
A. 2 February 2009: I don't think we are missing the point at all Fatherly Advice! What would you have done differently given the situation?
Would you have told her sister to come back at a more convenient time? How inconsiderate of her to become so upset an... (read in full...)
Should I accept my male friend (I'm bi) or live a lie with my fiancee?
Q. I am a 26 year old bi male, who has been in love with one of my male friends for 5 years. I was going to tell him a few times but I always thought he was straight. He has now told me that he fancies me and wants us to be together. I would have ...
A. 2 February 2009: You are going to hurt her a 100 times more by continuing your relationship and actually marrying her because i can tell you now it just won't work!
This thing you have with your friend is not a passing phase it has being going on for 5 years no... (read in full...)
How should an adult relate to teenagers on social networking sites?
Q. I am having a bit of a moral-social dilemma and would like your opinion on it. I am a bi woman who was born in 1982 (I am 26 now) and although I personally still feel like a 22 year old and get on well with people who are 2 or 3 years younger ...
A. 2 February 2009: I wouldn't question adding her to your friend base, i have answered many questions posed by young people on thnis site but since you have mentioned you have an attraction for her i would definately not accept.
I don't know how you can feel att... (read in full...)
Why if there is no regret does my husband cry all the time?
Q. Hi there well my question, I found out that my husband was having an affair a year ago,after 32 years of marriage. But he says there was nothing wrong with the marriage but he fell in love again with his first ...
A. 2 February 2009: I think it is probably the whole extended family children, grandchildren it has a knock on effect for everyone. No more happy family Christmases together with the immediate family, it is a big void when you weigh it all up!
I'm sure given ti... (read in full...)
Could it be that I love her after 8 years? I'm married to someone else...
Q. Please help. I need help and advice. I am an unhappily married 46 year old man with two children aged 13 and 8. Heres how the story goes, 8 years ago now I met what I feel was the love of my life, my soulmate. I worked with her 8 years ago and ...
A. 2 February 2009: It is a heart rendering story - would make a good film!
I'm sure you could start up a relationship but who knows if it would last or not you may infact have regrets once you are living in a total chaos and your children and other family members ... (read in full...)
Should I give in and have this abortion?
Q. right here goes im 21 years old im pregnant and facing one of the hardest desicions i think il ever have to make......my partner of 5 years and my 2 year old daughters dad has informed me he doesnt want another chid and wants me to have a aborti...
A. 2 February 2009: I'm so sorry you are in this predicament and having to make a major decision with little support.
I think you should do what you feel in your heart, if you have always disagreed with abortion you will find it hard to come to terms with and once... (read in full...)
I cancelled our anniversary to be there for my sister, how to make it up to the husband?
Q. My husband and me were having our year wedding anniversary. Until my sister came crying to me because her boyfriend was cheating on her with her best friend and she broke up with him on the spot. She was really upset about it so I cancelled had our ...
A. 2 February 2009: I think he is being a little bit selfish is this a normal trait of his, as Gina said how would he feel if it was one of his siblings? Put that dilema to him!
I would have done exactly as you did your sister came at an unfortunate time but she ... (read in full...)
Does this mean my mum suspects I'm gay?
Q. Hey eveyone, just so you know right from the begining, I'm 15 and gay. Im still in the closet about the whole thing. Now, my mum always makes the comment of, "you will make your wife very happy" or "you will make your girlfriend really happy" j...
A. 2 February 2009: She could have been making a flip coment because she has picked up on the fact that you don't seem interested in girls but i would bet her intuition is giving her the facts and as a mother would she is trying to make it easier for you to talk.
... (read in full...)
Husband left me-family knows where he is but won't tell me!
Q. My husband left me 5 months ago.I came home from work and my husband was gone,I haven't heard a word from him.His family knows where he is at but they won't let me contact him.What do I do....
A. 2 February 2009: Well he sounds unbelievable a total coward. You are far better off without him you have already done five months so i think things can only get better now and at least the not knowing is over because that is the worst!
You will need to be stron... (read in full...)
DearCupid had over one million people visit the site in January!
Q. I have just peeped at our visitor figures for January 2009, the month just gone, and I'm excited to see that DearCupid passed 1,000,000 (yes, one MILLION!) unique visitors/month for the first time. According to Google Analytics we had 1,040,812 ...
A. 1 February 2009: Yes thats really great news!
It just shows how valuable this site is to people when then hit a snag in their life a great idea proving to be very successful.
Congratulations x... (read in full...)
Is he interested? Or just being polite?
Q. Hi there. So I have known George* for about a year now, but we really just started noticing each other in college during the past 2 months or so. George knew that I was in a long-term relationship, so obviously he did not make a move then. But ...
A. 31 January 2009: If you haven't already replied you could do so saying that's ok about Saturday but if he fancied doing something sometime just to let you know, then you could leave the ball in his court so to speak.
If you have already replied just leave it until... (read in full...)
Husband left me-family knows where he is but won't tell me!
Q. My husband left me 5 months ago.I came home from work and my husband was gone,I haven't heard a word from him.His family knows where he is at but they won't let me contact him.What do I do....
A. 31 January 2009: Yes i think he will definately be in touch again just be patient. I take it he did he not leave a contact number when he called if not you could get a message to his family asking them to tell him you are willing to talk whenever he is.
Good ... (read in full...)
What do I do now after massive fall out?
Q. I've just had a huge falling out with a close friend who's female, basically we argued because she wanted me to admit my true feelings for her and yeah I do like her, but she has a boyfriend. Now we ain't talking and she doesn't want any contact ...
A. 30 January 2009: Well lay all your cards on the table tell her you wish to be more than just friends but it has to be when she is completely finished with her boyfriend for good.
She can't have her cake and eat it unless you are prepared to sacrifice a relation... (read in full...)
Husband left me-family knows where he is but won't tell me!
Q. My husband left me 5 months ago.I came home from work and my husband was gone,I haven't heard a word from him.His family knows where he is at but they won't let me contact him.What do I do....
A. 30 January 2009: Yes you are going to have to meet up with him to get to the bottom of this but it may be bad news.
Whatever happens be strong knowing is much better than what you have just been through and then you are in a much better place to be able to move ... (read in full...)
What do you think... Is he trying to make me jealous?
Q. I live in a small town where everybody knows each other and there’s not a lot of people your own age. There’s this boy (I’ll pretend his name is Aiden) and he lives on a farm outside a close town. We both go to the same church. There isn’t a good ...
A. 30 January 2009: Well i was really convinced that Aidan liked you but judging by his present actions i would keep a wide berth from him at the moment. I just think that he is beginning to play some kind of game he is stringing you girls along.
Just play it cool ... (read in full...)
What do I do now after massive fall out?
Q. I've just had a huge falling out with a close friend who's female, basically we argued because she wanted me to admit my true feelings for her and yeah I do like her, but she has a boyfriend. Now we ain't talking and she doesn't want any contact ...
A. 30 January 2009: I'm so sorry it is all getting a bit hectic at the moment for you.
I would back off a little bit for the time being, give her a little bit space i think it must all be too much for her right now. She has just broken up with her boyfriend so the l... (read in full...)
What is he thinking? I can't tell
Q. I posted this question yesterday and still have no answers. Could you please re-post and perhaps tag it as something else and not 'friends.' Many thanks! I met this guy through work a long time ago. Recently I saw him while out and couldn’t sto...
A. 28 January 2009: No i wouldn't give him the satisfaction of thinking that you are chasing him as shna has advised you i think he is a grown man and if he can't take the fact that you are emailing him as a hint that you like him you shouldn't have to spell it out to ... (read in full...)
Is he falling for me?
Q. Is he falling for me? I am madly in love with a guy who I only see from time to time. At first he was quite cool, only calling me now and then and only giving me a quick peck on the lips when we met! - Now he is calling a lot more and calling me ...
A. 28 January 2009: Yes i think you can gradually fall for someone the more you get to know them qualities they have show through.
Are you giving him plenty of signals back that he can pick up on that you actually like him as well?
I'm note sure of the circumsta... (read in full...)
What is he thinking? I can't tell
Q. I posted this question yesterday and still have no answers. Could you please re-post and perhaps tag it as something else and not 'friends.' Many thanks! I met this guy through work a long time ago. Recently I saw him while out and couldn’t sto...
A. 28 January 2009: I personally wouldn't bother with him any longer i think he is playing with you.
Why don't you turn it around when he eventually replies you take much longer to reply to him or even better don't! Let him have to get in touch with you again an... (read in full...)
Didn't call, didn't show up! Mind games?
Q. i've known this guy as a friend for years but we never really got to know each other well but i do kinda like him (our group of friends know each other though). Recently he sent a text asking me to meet him away from our group of friends and i like ...
A. 28 January 2009: I think he has took the fact that you wanted him to meet you with a group of friends as you were trying to brush him off as boyfriend material so he is probably feeling a bit down because he thinks you don't like him like that. He obviously likes ... (read in full...)
What do you think... Is he trying to make me jealous?
Q. I live in a small town where everybody knows each other and there’s not a lot of people your own age. There’s this boy (I’ll pretend his name is Aiden) and he lives on a farm outside a close town. We both go to the same church. There isn’t a good ...
A. 28 January 2009: I think you should get him on his own and have a friendly chat just say you are worried about your friendship because you value him as a friend but he seems a bit distant at the moment so you were wondering if anything was bothering him. That may ... (read in full...)
Do you believe in trusting gut instincts? I predict an affair!
Q. My boyfriend and I went to see his long lost sister who brought one of her friends, let's call her susan (who is married and has kids), but I couldn't help but get this feeling that something will happen between my boyfriend and this Susan. I have ...
A. 28 January 2009: Yes i am a very big believer in gut instinct but on this occasion maybe you should point out to your boyfriend what you have picked up on and give him a friendly warning that you will stand for no nonsence but you are a little bit worried something ... (read in full...)
Are my suspicions right?
Q. I am pretty sure that I already know the answers to my questions, but it is one of those things that you just have such a hard time believing until you hear it from somebody else, so here is goes. I met my husband at a new job that we had both just ...
A. 28 January 2009: Leopards never change their spots!
I am sure your suspisions are spot on he is up to his old tricks again and he more than likely is spending his time on some other woman as well as the porn sites.
I think you should have a really serious t... (read in full...)
Why am I still crying over him?
Q. I am in love with this guy. Simple, right? Wrong. I see him 6 days out of the whole year. I gave him my e-mail address last time I saw him, but he hasn't e-mailed me yet. I never got his e-mail address. I told him that I love im. He didn't talk to ...
A. 28 January 2009: You really need to let this go, it is going to do you know good at all.
You need to concentrate on your friends and make an active social life for yourself which will take your mind off him.
You are wasting energy on this guy when you could b... (read in full...)
Is he interested? Or just being polite?
Q. Hi there. So I have known George* for about a year now, but we really just started noticing each other in college during the past 2 months or so. George knew that I was in a long-term relationship, so obviously he did not make a move then. But ...
A. 26 January 2009: I am sure he likes you but i am not totally convinced he likes you the way you would like that is unless he is holding back some on some signals because he still believes you are in a relationship.
If you have mutual friends get them to drop a h... (read in full...)
How can I be more fun in school?
Q. In school, I'm focused, so i feel like guys always see me as a stickler. how can i be more fun in school? even when i'm in a class without friends?...
A. 26 January 2009: Well you are what you are and you should be happy for that if you put on a front and try to be something you are not it will be difficult to keep this up.
I am sure you have plenty school friends and i am sure they value your friendship so pleas... (read in full...)
Husband left me-family knows where he is but won't tell me!
Q. My husband left me 5 months ago.I came home from work and my husband was gone,I haven't heard a word from him.His family knows where he is at but they won't let me contact him.What do I do....
A. 24 January 2009: Have you any idea why he would up and leave you and why would his family protect him have they admitted that they know where he is?
How long have you being together? Do you have any children with your husband and if so has he been in touch wi... (read in full...)
What do I do now after massive fall out?
Q. I've just had a huge falling out with a close friend who's female, basically we argued because she wanted me to admit my true feelings for her and yeah I do like her, but she has a boyfriend. Now we ain't talking and she doesn't want any contact ...
A. 24 January 2009: Well im sure she will come to the right decision in the end her feelings for her boyfriend are cooling and the fact that he is getting on her case about you isn't going to help him. Things are said in the heat of the moment but most are easily ... (read in full...)
What do I do now after massive fall out?
Q. I've just had a huge falling out with a close friend who's female, basically we argued because she wanted me to admit my true feelings for her and yeah I do like her, but she has a boyfriend. Now we ain't talking and she doesn't want any contact ...
A. 23 January 2009: Hi thanks for your reply.
It seems to me that this is what is causing her upset he is more than likely giving her alot of grief about her relationship with you. She still values you as a friend and possibly a potential boyfriend and i think he... (read in full...)
What do I do now after massive fall out?
Q. I've just had a huge falling out with a close friend who's female, basically we argued because she wanted me to admit my true feelings for her and yeah I do like her, but she has a boyfriend. Now we ain't talking and she doesn't want any contact ...
A. 23 January 2009: Give it a few days unless she contacts you first this, will give her time to calm down and make sense of the situation. Its funny how the most terrible of arguments even when hurtful things have been said can be forgotten over time. I think s... (read in full...)
What do you think... Is he trying to make me jealous?
Q. I live in a small town where everybody knows each other and there’s not a lot of people your own age. There’s this boy (I’ll pretend his name is Aiden) and he lives on a farm outside a close town. We both go to the same church. There isn’t a good ...
A. 19 January 2009: Well in my opinion i think Aiden really likes you but maybe because you are a good friend of his he does not know whether to risk your friendship by asking you to be his girlfriend.
Why are you going to Heritage Fair with Brian when you clearly ... (read in full...)
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