My ex changed my Netflix avatar on his account
Q. Hi all, My boyfriend split up with me a couple of weeks ago and i have not heard from him (we had a fall out) He has a Netflix account and he has himself, my daughter and me on it with our names which have always been under a square blank...
A. 11 February 2019: You say "Because I am leaving him be at the moment, it's not lack of love on either side why we have split up, we struggled to communicate with each other.
"He hasn't changed the pictures in malice, they are cute and funny. I'm hurting enough a... (read in full...)
Should I try to track this woman down?
Q. Hi, I'm a 32 year old man, I have gotten out of a long term relationship about 6 months ago, which lasted 10 years and a 3 year relationship prior to that. Anyway last night I met a woman that I got on with quite well and ended up kissing her. But I ...
A. 10 February 2019: What do you have to offer this woman if you are still hung up on your ex? A bit of flirting and kissing is one thing, a relationship is quite something else.
Don't waste her time and yours. There will be other women WHEN YOU ARE READY. The timi... (read in full...)
My ex changed my Netflix avatar on his account
Q. Hi all, My boyfriend split up with me a couple of weeks ago and i have not heard from him (we had a fall out) He has a Netflix account and he has himself, my daughter and me on it with our names which have always been under a square blank...
A. 10 February 2019: Yes, a sign that he knows which buttons to press to get a reaction out of you.
If you have split up, you really need to get your own account and cut ties to him. How else are you going to move on?... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is preoccupied with his size and performance
Q. Recently my B/f has become paronoid about not being able to please me. He ususaly lasts a min or two and then that is it. Plus he worries that as he isnt as big as he would like to be that I might not be enjoying our love life as much as I could. ...
A. 10 February 2019: Appears you can't say right for saying wrong with this guy. If 99% of what you say is positive and 1% is not quite as positive, he will hear only the latter.
I think your boyfriend needs to learn that good sex is about communication, not size. Se... (read in full...)
Has anyone ever lost their libido to this degree due to boredom and lack of emotional connection and was I selfish for not being a sexually dutiful partner?
Q. Thank you to anyone who reads and responds to my post. I recently separated from a 9 year relationship, 4 years living together. I'm not sure if I have done the right thing but what I do know is that I am heart broken knowing I have broken his ...
A. 10 February 2019: If only men could/would learn that, generally speaking, men need sex to feel loved whereas women need to feel loved to want sex. Not surprisingly, you didn't feel loved, hence the loss of libido.
Find a man who loves you and makes time for you ... (read in full...)
In a polyamorous relationship and the woman is pregnant. How do I deal with the pregnancy?
Q. I'm in a very unfamiliar type of situation and not sure where to turn for advice. I am a woman dating a married couple (FMF polyamorous triad) for about 6 months, and we have all been getting along great to where we spend most days together, and ...
A. 10 February 2019: Not judging here, just genuinely curious: what would make someone get involved as a "third party" in an established relationship? I understand getting involved just for sexual gratification but this appears to be a lot more. How did this happen? How ... (read in full...)
I am looking for your counsel how to break away from this man.
Q. Two years ago my (60) boyfriend’s EX cheated on him... while dejected and feeling “dirty about all women” his buddies asked him along on their overseas holiday. There my BF hired a sex-worker for the duration. While I appreciate his honesty in t...
A. 9 February 2019: How do you break away from him? As quickly and as cleanly as possible.
You have already decided he is not for you. Yes, he MAY tick lots of boxes but his attitude in this area does not sit well with you, as well as "other niggling issues".... (read in full...)
He's not as into me as I am into him. What now?
Q. i probably know what i should do but id still like some advice. I have been 'dating' a guy for 4 month we dont always get to see each other every week due to work and other commitments. We spend time at each others places but we had a massive talk ...
A. 8 February 2019: Wow! 4 months into a relationship and you are already having heavy discussions about the future? Did that happen because of your strong feelings for him? Are you trying to push things forward at a rate that appears, at least from the scant detail ... (read in full...)
Does it sound like my boyfriend is married or not?
Q. I found out my boyfriend had someone else a couple of years ago.this woman has phoned me a few times claiming to be his wife but what she says doesn't add up.he admits to having had a relationship with her but denies they are married.when I first ...
A. 5 February 2019: Sorry, but I have to ask, are you serious?
If he is in a relationship with this woman, he is not free. Whether he is technically married or not is IMMATERIAL. I would suggest the mystery woman he CLAIMS he married is a convenient inventio... (read in full...)
Do you think that sounds like she is looking for sex?
Q. Hi I met a girl online and on the same day she suggested I could visit her, stay in a hotel and she would spend the night with me. She says she wants something more than just a hookup. I'm really not sure what is going on here. Do you think that sou...
A. 5 February 2019: Whoa! Hold your horses, tiger! This has so many red flags waving, it's downright horrifying.
A girl you contact with on line suggests on the SAME day you meet up in a hotel and offers to sleep with you? This could be so many different kinds of... (read in full...)
I’m miserable in our relationship and don’t know what to do!
Q. Hi I’ve been with my fiancé for 5 years now we split up for a couple of months last year we got back together but I told him things needed to change as soon as he gets home from work he starts getting stoned I go to work half hour after he comes ...
A. 5 February 2019: How many more years do you want to waste doing exactly what you are doing and being miserable? Waiting for him to change is futile. He is who he is. If that is all you think you are worth, then stay with him and carry on telling him things need to ... (read in full...)
I love dogs but my boyfriend doesn't. How can I make him change his mind?
Q. My bf and me got into an argument tonight because we were talking about dogs and I said they are better than people. He asked why I think that. I said because dogs are so selfless and pure. They are always happy and love unconditionally. Unlike ...
A. 4 February 2019: You can't force anyone to love anything. End of. He has been honest with you and told you he is not a dog person. Think of something you are really not into, then imagine someone telling you you MUST love it. How would that work?
I totally ... (read in full...)
My cheating ex dotes on his new girlfriend
Q. So I found out my partner was cheating on me November last year and I ditched him (yay) Our 2 year relationship was pretty rocky throughout and so I absolutely know in my head that I have done the right thing by leaving him. My gripe though...
A. 3 February 2019: I believe the universe sends us people to teach us lessons. Everyone who has an affect on our lives - good OR bad - teaches us things about ourselves . . . IF we CHOOSE to accept the lesson. If we refuse to learn from the experience, we will keep ... (read in full...)
Were my in-laws out of line or did my brother overreact to an innocent question?
Q. My in-laws have a problem with boundaries and they are kind of are drama queens. My younger brother on the other hand is more of a private person. So my wife and I had a six month old baby. On Christmas Day, we all had our families over (m...
A. 2 February 2019: Having chosen NEVER to get married or have kids, I often used to get asked the similar questions and recall finding it irritating and very invasive, although I always managed to either brush it aside or just smile, as it was usually family or my ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend wants money and has found another love!
Q. Hello I am suffering in the depression my gf says that she no more relationship with me , because she found new guy but I rely want her and love so much , she want money but I cant give money ,what can I do , I think cant live without hersef . ...
A. 31 January 2019: Actually, you CAN live without her. I do, however, understand that feeling of loss you are suffering at the moment. You are mourning not only the loss of a relationship but also of all your hopes and plans for the future.
When you meet the righ... (read in full...)
I’m feeling guilty about enjoying my casual relationship
Q. I’ve been occasionally seeing a friend of a friend. We’ve gone on a few dates, but then I said I wasn’t looking for a relationship. I didn’t want to scare him off/wasn’t sure what I wanted. He’s been into me and contacting me for about 6 mont...
A. 30 January 2019: Back when your mother was young, "nice" girls didn't do that sort of thing! Times have changed (fortunately). Also, you are now an adult and, while you should always respect what your parents think and believe, you are old enough to decide for ... (read in full...)
I just found out that he's married and having an affair with me behind his wife's back! I want to run but he makes me happier than I've ever been. What do I do?
Q. I have been dating the love of my life for 4 months. I am an extremely introverted person, but felt extremely comfortable with him from day 1. The connection that we share is indescribable. He is the sweetest, most loving man that I have ever met ...
A. 29 January 2019: If you are torn, perhaps you could ask his wife what you should do. I am sure she will not mince her words.
Sweetheart, he is not free to offer you anything except occasional casual sex when he is in the area. You deserve more, as does his wife... (read in full...)
Do I tell her my feelings and risk ending our friendship?
Q. Bit of a long question here, but I've got this friend that I met a few years ago and lived with for a year in university. Since then we have basically become best friends and throughout it I've always maintained us just being friends and had been ...
A. 29 January 2019: If she is happy with this boyfriend, then you need to step back and keep your new found feelings to yourself. You had plenty of opportunity over the years to find and express these feelings, yet you didn't. For the time being at least, it is someone ... (read in full...)
If he wanted to see me, why doesn't he?
Q. I met this guy online about a year ago, he lives an hour away from me. He kept messaging me about how beautiful and hot I was and said he wanted something fun and non committal. I said I wasn't looking for that and wished him luck in finding it. A ...
A. 28 January 2019: He just wants casual sex. You are holding out for more. Your agendas are different.
He is dating someone who is happy with a casual relationship. You have made it clear you are worth better.
Don't crumble. You have made it clear what you w... (read in full...)
My daughter just found out that I am her biological father not the man she grew up calling dad. Do I contact her?
Q. My question is thirty years ago I was very much in love with my youth sweetheart,but she she got married but we never stopped seeing each other, she had to children, we didn't know if her daughter was her husband or mine but we split up for the ...
A. 28 January 2019: You daughter may decide that the man who raised her is her true father which, to all intents and purposes, is true. It takes much more than being a sperm donor to be a father.
Much as you may yearn to reach out to your daughter (and I do get that... (read in full...)
New friendship w/ someone I met from a reality show
Q. Ok... I'm so confused. I am currently engaged. Not the best relationship by any means, but I am engaged and hoping for it to get better after a big move happens to get away from his insane and cruel family who hurt us pretty bad. Oddly en...
A. 28 January 2019: Should you not be concentrating on your relationship with your fiance rather than some random "star"? Your description of your relationship sounds like there could be much work needed.
Does your fiance know about your "friendship" with this guy... (read in full...)
My crush at work knows I like her. She has a boyfriend. What do I do now?
Q. Hello. I have a coworker I happened to like her. I met her at work and became a friend but I have started having a feeling for her just 2 months now since last December. So I just told her yesterday how I feel and she was surprised but it went well. ...
A. 28 January 2019: What can you do? You can LISTEN to what the lady told you and back off. She is happy with her boyfriend.
If you need a second opinion, contact her boyfriend and ask HIM what he feels you should do.
If she has any sense, she will avoid you n... (read in full...)
I feel like he likes me but isn’t sure about taking the next step?
Q. So I’m in a bizarre situation at the moment. I’m 20 years old but I only just had my first kiss with this guy I really like. We met at a party and started messaging every day. I was going overseas so I invited him to a friends party - he didn’t ...
A. 28 January 2019: I suspect the next time you post, it will be along the lines of "he has blocked me and refuses to speak to me at all and things are very awkward when I see him".
You are clearly choosing to misinterpret all the signs he is giving you and still ha... (read in full...)
I'm unhappy with the relationship want to end it but partner acts like nothing is wrong
Q. Hi guys. Im in deseperate need of advice because im literally at my wits end. My bf is 8 yrs younger than me. We have a 3 yr old together and i have a tennager daughter from a previous relationship. We had a whirlwind romance and i ended up pregnant ...
A. 28 January 2019: You don't need his permission to end the relationship. If it is over for YOU, it is over.
Who does your house belong to? If it is yours, give him a time limit in which he has to leave. If he still hasn't left, which is likely, get a solicito... (read in full...)
I feel like he likes me but isn’t sure about taking the next step?
Q. So I’m in a bizarre situation at the moment. I’m 20 years old but I only just had my first kiss with this guy I really like. We met at a party and started messaging every day. I was going overseas so I invited him to a friends party - he didn’t ...
A. 27 January 2019: Sweetheart, if someone tells you they don't care enough about you to be with you, BELIEVE them. Yes, he MAY get on with you. Yes, he MAY like spending time with you. Yes, he MAY like chatting. However, he does not want to be in a romantic ... (read in full...)
I want to give him one more chance and I also don’t!
Q. My boyfriend and i habe been together for 2.5years.. In our time together ive caught him talking to/ getting pics from at least 10 different women. Hes not a terrible boyfriend.. He can be a jerk and a child at times but i do still love him.....
A. 26 January 2019: The definition of madness: doing the same thing over and over yet expecting different results.
Enough said. You deserve better. ... (read in full...)
How is affection, spending time with someone or making sure your spouses needs are being taken care of, so many “things” to do for your wife that it would exclude her/me from the right to intimacy?
Q. I am currently three years into my second marriage. I have had successfull sexual relationships in the past. I have never ever experienced what I am currently experiencing so my question is two fold. 1. Is this a reasonable/healthy relationship? 2. ...
A. 26 January 2019: You have had other relationships and even been married before, yet you ask if this is "normal"? Really? On what planet?
No, it is NOT "normal" and certainly not good or healthy. However, whether you choose to put up with it is entirely your cal... (read in full...)
How long do we try for kids before moving on?
Q. I don't want any judgements, this has not been an easy desicion. There is a chance my long term partner can't have kids. I have always wanted kids. I don't want to do IVF treatment. How long should we try before moving on?...
A. 26 January 2019: By "moving on" I assume you mean finishing the relationship because your partner cannot have kids without help?
Have you considered the "problem" could be with YOU and not her?
My advice: finish the relationship NOW before there is any fur... (read in full...)
He's coming on too strong, talks about sex a lot, has a child with an ex. Should I ignore these red flags?
Q. So about 6 months ago I met this attractive guy.. we met in a cute way as I got him lost accidentally by trying to help with directions, and he later gave me his number and name, which I hadn't asked for. I added him on Facebook and he messaged me, ...
A. 24 January 2019: Why would you settle for someone you are not sure about?
IGNORE THOSE RED FLAGS AT YOUR PERIL! You have a gut instinct for good reason; it is to PROTECT you from danger.
In your shoes, I would just block him and not get into contact again. F... (read in full...)
My boyfriend won’t call after we have an argument!
Q. We Dear Cupid: I have been in a relationship for two years. I am 42 and he is 50. He does not like to text nor be on the phone and we do not have hardly any communication during the day and we see mostly during the weekend as he only comes to my ho...
A. 24 January 2019: But this guy IS talking. The problem is, YOU are not LISTENING.
He has told you several times, very plainly, that he has no desire to move in with you and that he can easily replace you. Why are you still convinced you can make him change h... (read in full...)
I'm separated and my friend of years is making subtle moves on me. What do I do?
Q. im falling out of love with my husband do to his emotional and verbal abuse.Been married for 15 years but together for 25 there is no intimacy for the last year or so.Occassional hug here or there .However he is great with our daughter relationship ...
A. 23 January 2019: Sweetheart, after so many years, your husband knows all too well what buttons to press to make you feel like shit, and that is exactly what he is doing. My response to such an idiotic comment would have been something along the lines of "Well, that ... (read in full...)
I need my boyfriend to want me!
Q. i recently met this guy and i feel good about things. He is well hot and seems v nice. The trouble is he is a bit backwards at coming forward. My last B/f was like a mad stud in and out the bedroomanad we would just do stuff were and when ever. Th...
A. 23 January 2019: Blimey girl, give the poor guy a chance! You have only recently met. The relationship is new. You suspect he may be a virgin. What is more important to you: this relationship or an immediate rampant sex life? If the latter, then let this poor guy go ... (read in full...)
Should I let her go unless she takes the initiative?
Q. I have been in a relationship for many years. We do not live together because we both agreed we would wait until each of our children are grown before we combine our households. There have been "ups and downs" over the years, but never anything ...
A. 22 January 2019: If you keep chasing, she will keep running. In your shoes I would stop chasing and see what happens. If she doesn't make any effort to sort things, then her heart truly isn't in this relationship. Are you strong enough to back off and wait so you ... (read in full...)
I’m not sure how to interpret ‘hey chick’ in his text!
Q. If a male acquitance or a friend sent you a text starting 'hey chick' and you had not one like that before from them, is it something as a female you would find endearing, condescending or the sender being flirty with her. Had one recently and ...
A. 22 January 2019: I think this sort of thing is very subjective. As with anything said/written, it often depends greatly on who sends it and who receives it.
Personally (and I am older than you) I would see it as a cute compliment, nothing more. He's probably... (read in full...)
Ended relationship, but already having doubts
Q. Last week I ended my relationship with my girlfriend of 6 years. I hadn’t felt the same about her for some time, and for the last few months didn’t try to conceal the fact. I felt that I was clinging more to the situation we found ourselves in rat...
A. 21 January 2019: You are in your late 30s, possibly 40. You cannot blame your parents for what happens in your life forever. Get a grip and start taking responsibility for yourself. We are all different and we are not our parents.
It takes two to make a relation... (read in full...)
Should a man break up with a woman over not getting enough sex?
Q. Been in a relationship for two years, am 63, she is 58, I work one job she has one full time job an a part time job. I pretty much live with her, own my own house to.what's up is maybe sex once every two months, she always got an excuse.she just ...
A. 21 January 2019: So, when she wants to cuddle, do YOU accommodate HER happily, or do you sigh and do it with bad grace, or maybe even not at all? Or make snide comments?
Her reluctance to have sex with you could be down to many reasons. She could just be exhauste... (read in full...)
My husband of 12 years is so secretive and refuses to talk to me just gives me the silent treatment
Q. I am in my late 50's and have been married for second time for 12 years. I have grown up children from my first marriage. My husband is 60 and from the beginning he has been so secretive. He never shows any interest in my life and health and never ...
A. 20 January 2019: Would being physically alone be worse than being emotionally alone, as you are now? What are you getting from this marriage, apart from grief?
Firstly, if he is spending money from your JOINT account without your knowledge or express agreemen... (read in full...)
My partner is unhappy with his job and I don't know how to help him
Q. My partner has been feeling unhappy with his position at work. He feels it is beneath his skill set. He’s been looking for something different but hasn’t found anything in town that turns his crank yet. His boss can see he works hard and will ...
A. 20 January 2019: Sweetheart, commendable as your concern and support are, you have to stop over-reacting to his unhappiness. Nobody is happy ALL the time. This is life. Shit happens. We have to learn to deal with it. He is an adult, not a child. His happiness is HIS ... (read in full...)
Should I ask my married lover for baby?
Q. So I have been seeing a man who lives with his common law wife and thier 2 kids.When we met he told me that he was in process of leaving her but now almost 2 years later he still lives at home and he won t see me outside his work hours. Anyways, ...
A. 20 January 2019: Wow! Are you really still that naive at 34 or is the urge to have a baby clouding your judgement completely?
This whole post is screwed up. You are both taking risks with contraception yet he "freaked out" when you thought you were pregnant... (read in full...)
My partner's behaviour towards me has been very questionable ever since he lost his job. What's going on here?
Q. This is a little uncomfortable to write, I'm not sure if I'm the problem or not. I've been in a relationship for 2 years and up until about 8 months ago it was really care free, relaxed, and just a joy really. Now, however, it's... I don't ...
A. 19 January 2019: NO, you are NOT being over-sensitive. You DO have a problem here. Don't let him gaslight you into believing YOU are the one at fault when he is very obviously controlling you and ABUSING you.
I suspect your partner's self confidence took a knock-... (read in full...)
Can we get married in a church if neither of us are religious?
Q. My fiancee and I would like to get married in a church, however neither of us are religious. Does anyone have any thoughts or advice on this? Neither of our families are religious either. We have come across many churches locally and while ...
A. 18 January 2019: Depending on the religion, most clergy will want to interview you and your future husband, ask if you attend Sunday services, ask whether you intend to raise your children in their faith. It is not just a case of turning up, getting married and ... (read in full...)
I'm separated and my friend of years is making subtle moves on me. What do I do?
Q. im falling out of love with my husband do to his emotional and verbal abuse.Been married for 15 years but together for 25 there is no intimacy for the last year or so.Occassional hug here or there .However he is great with our daughter relationship ...
A. 15 January 2019: P.S. As you and our daughter sound close, why not discuss it with her when the time is right. She sounds like she just wants you to be happy so, hopefully, she will make a good sounding board. ... (read in full...)
I'm separated and my friend of years is making subtle moves on me. What do I do?
Q. im falling out of love with my husband do to his emotional and verbal abuse.Been married for 15 years but together for 25 there is no intimacy for the last year or so.Occassional hug here or there .However he is great with our daughter relationship ...
A. 15 January 2019: Your first priority needs to be to split properly from your husband. You need to have a chat with him and see what you can do to help him move out. Despite your relationship effectively being over, he sounds reluctant/too lazy to move out. Offer to ... (read in full...)
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