I hate my husband for putting me down
Q. I hate my husband! I'm am clumsy person and makes unintentionally tiny mistakes. He always calls me stupid, retard, etc. I have a master's degree and I come from a good family. I don't call people's names even if I am mad. My husband said I'm weak ...
A. 5 May 2020: What do YOU think you should do? What do you WANT to do? You have two options: get out or live for the next however many years being verbally abused by this horrible man. What do you think you deserve? ... (read in full...)
Why does the Guy I’m seeing ask me insecure type questions ?
Q. Met this guy a month ago and he’s been pursuing me for awhile. First night we met up he cooked and baked cookies for us. he begged me to come over again and i did. But the second time i ended up spending the night and we had sex. I stayed again this ...
A. 5 May 2020: The right time to have asked questions like that would have been well before you jumped into bed with him.
He's "flaky" (your words) and "insecure". Why are you even seeing him again, let alone having sex with him?
My take on this situation i... (read in full...)
Why does he keep reminding me that he’s single, is he only looking for something casual?
Q. In every conversation I have w/this guy he throws it into the conversation that he's a single man. Or everytime we meet up he reminds me of his relationship status. And he always ask me “when’s the next time you’re coming over?” Or “when will i see ...
A. 4 May 2020: I hope you are not having sex with him while he keeps remind you he is a single guy. There is no problem with someone being single. Indeed, many people are very happy being single. However, he cannot have his cake and eat it. He cannot be single and ... (read in full...)
Is it ok to talk to two people at once on online dating?
Q. Hi all, I have had a rough few years and have abstained from the dating scene during this period in part because of a breakup that took me a long time to get over. My life currently doesn't allow me to meet new people often so I decided to try...
A. 4 May 2020: You are not actually dating either of these ladies yet. You are simply talking with a view to dating. I can see no harm in talking to more than one woman. After all, you wouldn't feel guilty about having more than one friend at a time.
If as... (read in full...)
My heartache, heartbreak, and broken up family
Q. We've been together 3 years the last couple of months our communication hasn't been good, we haven't had sex at all, and it's seemed like we're in limbo I've tried numerous times to reach out to my ex since his best fri e d just got murdered and his ...
A. 2 May 2020: Your obsession with his new squeeze is understandable (been there, done that) but it is also pointless. You (and we) can only guess at what is going on in your ex's head, what he sees in this new woman and what she has to offer him.
You need to ... (read in full...)
I recognise the man on the dating site, and he is MARRIED!
Q. Dear Cupid. I'm on a dating site and have had a man message me saying "Hey how are you going :)" and "Your super cute, love to know more about yourself!? Feel free to ask me anything" Anyway, I Looked this guy up on facebook because I recogni...
A. 1 May 2020: NO, NO and NO again. It is not his wife's fault that he is a cheater. Why would you want to hurt her? If he really IS a cheater, she will find out sooner or later anyway, or she may just live in ignorant bliss for years.
It didn't take much for... (read in full...)
Is it time for me to finally move on?
Q. A few years ago I fell for a friend. We spent a lot of time together and all of his words and actions signalled he had romantic interest. I did not know where I stood with him so I asked him and he started panicking and said “he might have been ...
A. 1 May 2020: What is is about this guy that attracts you? You know from your own experience and from what you have heard that he is terrified of commitment of any sort - even something as casual as dating.
In order to "let go" and move on, you need to figur... (read in full...)
Married co worker is objectifying me and I just want to be friends.
Q. Why does EVERY man I try to befriend end up objectifying me? They'll be totally respectful to our other mutual female friends but I get treated different. Like this guy I THOUGHT was nice at work: the worst thing he did was be "silly"and he did that ...
A. 29 April 2020: I suspect if you were to turn round and challenge him by saying something like "Come on then, big boy, give it a go if you think you're big and hard enough", he would run a mile and sh$t himself.
He doesn't sound like a "bad" person, just a bit of... (read in full...)
I moved out because I didnt feel safe, landlords are asking me to come back.
Q. Hi people. I moved out of a property 2 months ago due to the owner's adult kid harassing me. He made false accusations against me and was going through something at the time. I never made a big deal of the situation but I avoided talking to him. I ...
A. 28 April 2020: What exactly does "he has left the property" mean? They threw him out? He had a tantrum and stormed out? He left because he has decided to move elsewhere? There is no saying he will not come back. Imagine how uncomfortable that would be.
I sup... (read in full...)
Happily married yet lusting over a doctor! Help me please!
Q. I have been married for 4 and a half years and have a 3 year old daughter. There are no problems in my marriage and I thought till a few days ago that I was very happy and content with life. My husband adores me and we have a healthy sex life. I...
A. 24 April 2020: Just because you are with someone else does not mean you automatically do not find anyone else attractive. It is common to feel attraction to someone. However, what you choose to do about that attraction will depend on your morals.
You know thi... (read in full...)
Should I assume he lost interest and deleted my number?
Q. I have been briefly seeing a guy which started as friendship and we have been friends on FB. He last messaged me to ask how I was at the beginning of April. He last acknowledged me by text two weeks ago when I decided to tell him that if I had met ...
A. 23 April 2020: Maybe he has a girlfriend/wife and SHE asked the question?... (read in full...)
S it possible for friend zoned relationships to turn romantic?
Q. Okay, weird question. I can't ask my friends so I am turning to dearcupid as usual. I have a female housemate who is a nudist, although she refers to herself as a naturist. What this means is she doesn't like to wear clothes. Yes I know it's weird! ...
A. 22 April 2020: What strange behaviour. Are you and she the only two people living in this house, or are there other housemates? Does she parade herself naked in front of them as well?
I'll tell you what this reminded me of (and please don't take offence)... (read in full...)
I should be so happy that we are getting married but I'm not because he cheated on me 2 years ago and 'm worried he's still in contact with the woman
Q. Hi All- I'm in desperate need of relationship advice. I'm currently engaged to someone who I've been with for almost 10 years. We've been engaged for about 5 months. As with any relationship, things between my fiance and I haven't always been suns...
A. 21 April 2020: Firstly, please remember this is YOUR life, not anyone else's. You do not have to live up to ANYONE's expectations of you, nor do something just because it is what your friends expect of you.
Why would you want to marry someone who you don't tr... (read in full...)
Do I reach out to my deceased husband's brother?
Q. My husband died two years ago from cancer. He had an older brother who he stopped talking to for at least fifteen years (we were married for fifteen years and he refused to talk to him). I have no idea what happened between them two, except my ...
A. 20 April 2020: If your husband and his brother did not speak for 15 years, then they were obviously not part of each other's lives and not important to each other. It will only hurt you if you contact him to tell him his brother died and he shrugs and asks "so ... (read in full...)
Are these enough warning signs that my partner isn't into me?
Q. So I have been in a relationship for almost 6 months and am wondering whether this relationship will last. I've had a lot of bad relationships, and childhood was not ideal so I doubt myself a lot and struggle with what a normal relationship should ...
A. 20 April 2020: What are you getting from this relationship?
My guess would be that there is one of two things going on here: either your boyfriend has commitment issues and finds it hard to get close to people (possibly autistic?) or he is just with you beca... (read in full...)
Doubts with texting style with my LDR
Q. I met a man online about 3 months ago. We communicate about every day through whatsapp, skype, facebook messenger, viber, facetime calls, Instagram etc. Sometimes I am realizing when we are texting That it feels if I am talking to a different ...
A. 19 April 2020: If it feels "not right", then trust your gut instinct and proceed with great caution, or even back away. I wonder when the first approach for money will come. Whatever you do, do NOT send him any, regardless of how plausible the reason might be. ... (read in full...)
I can’t understand why she doesn’t want sex with me anymore
Q. Hi I’m not normally one to ask personal questions on these sort of things but I need advice I’ve been with my fiancée for 6 years we have a 3 year old together I started sleeping in the spare room when our child was ill and I haven’t moved back into ...
A. 19 April 2020: WHY haven't you moved back into the shared bedroom? What are you waiting for? Perhaps your fiancee sees your lack of desire to move back into her bed as a sign you do not want sex with her?
Who looks after the child? Does your fiancee work? Do... (read in full...)
How do I tackle the problem of my boyfriend commenting every time I eat something?
Q. I’ve recently moved in with my boyfriend, and I’ve noticed he makes comments every time I eat something. Anything. Like it’s too big or too much or I’m going to spoil my appetite if I have a snack. I don’t eat that much and I’m a thin girl so I’m...
A. 19 April 2020: You are already starting to get anxiety around food. That is how eating disorders can start. In fact, yours are already starting as you are trying to "eat in secret".
What are you getting out of this relationship? Is this how you want to live the... (read in full...)
We split up 3 months ago but he's still living with me showing no desire to move out
Q. Hi I ended my relationship with a lazy selfish partner in January he is addicted to weed and spends hundreds on it a month I told him stupidly he could stay until he found somewhere else to live his parents told him he can move back in with them but ...
A. 15 April 2020: There's not really much you can do during the lock down as people are not supposed to be moving homes or having contact with new people.
However, the lock down will end at some point and, when it does, you need to give him a date by which you want... (read in full...)
I don't like his creepy behaviour
Q. There is a guy I met 3 years and I thought he could have been a potential suitor. Recently I have started to become aware of things that I do not like about him. Before the lockdown he would spend hours a day on Facebook. He has nearly 2000 like...
A. 15 April 2020: You had high hopes for this guy but he turned out to be a sleazebag. That's what dating is all about: sorting out the wheat from the chaff.
You now know a relationship with him is not something you want, so just cut contact. Why does it have to ... (read in full...)
Is it wrong to want specific things out a person you are dating?
Q. Hello Aunt's and Uncle, I havent been on the site for a long time, and for a long time I thought I was content. Its been 2 years or maybe even more since I broke up with my Long Term College Girlfriend, I dated a bit after but havent found a g...
A. 13 April 2020: I fail to see anything wrong in wanting the best for yourself - including a partner who "gets" you and fits in with the family you love. Why would you settle for anything less, especially when you have a lovely family and, presumably, a mother and ... (read in full...)
Why it is that some men nice and loving to the woman that they are dating, yet rude/inconsiderate to other women?
Q. Hi everyone, I'm hoping someone can offer up some answers to my question. I was wondering why it is that some men nice and loving to the woman that they are dating, yet rude/inconsiderate to other women? I first noticed this in college. There w...
A. 13 April 2020: Why do they do it? You've answered your own question: because some people are just assholes (not limited to men).
Well done for taking notice of how some of these specimens speak about others and getting away from them before they get to a point ... (read in full...)
My partner of 10 years is an alcoholic and porn addict with a bad temper, but he has his good points.. should I leave him? Title
Q. Hey guys! So I've been with my partner 10 years, it isn't all bad and I've learnt a lot through being with him. See, I grew up in a broken home, and though my mum loves me unconditionally, I was never really taught 'how to adult' or how to look ...
A. 13 April 2020: Out of a very long post, one thing stood out for me and it was this: "this is not how I pictured my future to be. I wanted more than this."
Yes, it will hurt to break up, but how much more will it hurt 5, 10 or more years down the line when you... (read in full...)
My partner stresses at me when I'm online gaming.
Q. Hey guys, i play on the xbox most nights with a lad ive known for atleast 7 years, i havnt really spoke to him or played on the console with him for the last 2 years as he played differant games but now hes joined up with me again, but hes met other ...
A. 12 April 2020: "if im on the game and the house is amess or the kids misbehave while im on the game she stress's at me, i then have to deal with the kids and tidy the mess up. Help me please."
Seriously? She's left doing the housework and looking after your 4 c... (read in full...)
I only want one girl who I can love.
Q. I have been keeping imagine being in love with someone who loves me. Ridiculously,this makes me even more lonely. I have a girl who lives in a remote town in the mountains 3000 kilometers away.She is kind,pretty and pure.I come to acquaint ,like and ...
A. 9 April 2020: Love is about sharing every day life and challenges, about caring for each other and being there for each other through everything life throws at you. It is not about some romantic dream of finding a pure girl and you both being happy ever after.
... (read in full...)
I've met a 50 year old who lives in his mother's garage.
Q. I recently met a guy who is nearing 50. He has a full time job and has worked in the same place for 20 years. The problem? He lives in his mother's garage. He's not an addict, has a job, has a car, his kids are grown and gone. He's been divorc...
A. 9 April 2020: I have little idea what living in his mother's garage entails for this man, or the circumstances surrounding his living arrangements, as you do not say anything about either. What I do suspect (based on what little you have written, so apologies if ... (read in full...)
I might be the father of my cousin's baby.
Q. My second cousin and I were growing up, we always been close. We always did stuff together because we had a lot of things in common. When we were 16 years old, we did have sex with each other. That was the only time until we were 21 years old. ...
A. 9 April 2020: Why would you get involved all these years later? What would be the point? What could you offer the child? The only parents she knows are the ones who have raised her, who have been there for her from the start and continue to be there for her and ... (read in full...)
Can I help the man I love, or will he never change?
Q. Dear Cupid, I 26 am seeing a man who is 29 whom I have known for 10 years. he does nice things for me, he does his own washing, cleans up after himself (present) but here's the thing... 10 years ago when we were younger I was still in school, I...
A. 7 April 2020: He already has one child he hardly sees (and I am assuming, based on what you have written, doesn't support); why would you want to create another one with him? Can you cope with having TWO people dependent on you - your child AND this man? Even if ... (read in full...)
I believed in him and now he is a big disappointment! What do I do?
Q. Hi all. My husband and I have been married for nearly 5 years now. Both of us work in the medical field. When we got married he promised me that he would continue to do his higher studies to achieve his dreams. 5 years later, I have managed to get ...
A. 3 April 2020: "I married him for love but I also liked the drive and the motivation he had towards life and his career."
His drive and motivation were part of the person you fell in love with. I wonder, is it only his medical career that he has lost enthusia... (read in full...)
I'm considering what I want for my wedding considering everything going on in the world
Q. Hello, Where to start? As we all know the world is in the middle of a crisis pandemic. It has really made me reconsider how much money we're spending on our wedding in 2022. We've only booked the hotel but this alone is £7000. This crisis has...
A. 31 March 2020: This is something the two of you need to discuss and agree. It doesn't matter what others think (unless they are close family and friends whose opinions and feelings you wish to take into consideration). The day is about the two of you and what YOU ... (read in full...)
Should I answer this guy after promising my boyfriend I wouldnt have any further contact with him.
Q. I met a guy two years ago who I started to fall for, despite me being in a relationship. I confessed to my boyfriend and he was very upset. He wanted me to stop contacting the other guy, so I did. I told him that I had chosen to stick with the life ...
A. 28 March 2020: Personally I would ignore the email. He has no way of knowing if you have seen his message (you could have changed your email address). Are you not able to block his email address?
Assuming the situation is still the same and you are happy wi... (read in full...)
I feel he played games and is not supportive.
Q. There was a guy that I liked on my course who is in his 40s. After getting to know him more recently, I have found he is quite anxious. Last week he messaged me as he said what is going on at the moment in the world had scared him. I replied and ...
A. 28 March 2020: "I want a man who can provide support during a crisis."
He is not your man. He owes you nothing. He is just someone you met on a course and initially liked.
I don't know what you told him that you now wish you hadn't, but it sounds like what... (read in full...)
Would you stay with an insecure partner?
Q. My man and I have been together for almost 4 years he recently just accused me of cheating which made me very upset because I’m not the type of person he has a lot of insecurities from when he cheated on me which is something that I forgave him for ...
A. 27 March 2020: He's either cheating again or has someone lined up with whom he would LIKE to cheat. When he gets caught out, he will make out it is your fault because he believed YOU were cheating.
He could move from merely accusing you to being verbally... (read in full...)
I don't want my partner back but he says he cant live without us.
Q. I split up with my ex after discovering his infidelity. We have 3 children together who he still sees every other weekend and we have stayed amicable. 2 weeks ago he went silent for about a week. He told me yesterday he is struggling with his ment...
A. 25 March 2020: I wonder how much thought he gave to YOU being upset when he was having it away with his other woman? It doesn't take a genius to work out how hurt his long term partner and the mother of his children would be by him messing around with another ... (read in full...)
I'm not sure if I should call her now, and let her know I like her, or wait for her to call me one day.
Q. So this may sound corny, but i just dont want to mess things up. i began a job back in june delivering auto parts to a small chain of car shops. in one of the stores i began a friendly relationship with one of the counter girls. She knows that i ...
A. 22 March 2020: Op, thank you for explaining what you meant. I now understand better. Sadly we live in a ridiculously litigious society where we can easily fall foul of rules we didn't even realize existed.
That aside, I do hope you have contacted this lady now... (read in full...)
Would women date an ugly male virgin?
Q. I've never been on a date before, I've never had a girlfriend, and I've never kissed a girl either. I am of course a male virgin. I'm not a handsome man so I don't ask girls out on dates. They'll just say no so I feel like I shouldn't waste their ...
A. 22 March 2020: You do realize that women are not nearly as visually orientated when looking for a partner as are men? While there will always be women who put great importance on pairing up with "eye candy", there are also plenty of women who know that looks are ... (read in full...)
Could we ever work out again?
Q. I was in a relationship for a year with my ex. We lived together and were deeply in love and had a crazy sexual connection. However - he was very insecure and possessive and the relationship became quite toxic with frequent crazy arguments (was ...
A. 22 March 2020: Why would you want to waste your life waiting for someone who is - in your words - mentally unstable, unreliable, possessive and a cheater? He is not going to magically mature into what you need. Sexual chemistry alone will not keep you together, as ... (read in full...)
I thought my Mom had enough on her plate.
Q. So, I am a 19 year old college freshmen who has a mom who got mad at her. Did I do wrong? I am the 2nd oldest of my mom's 7 kids but the 1st one she gave birth to. She adopted my older have brother and kept him after she and dad split. My parents ...
A. 21 March 2020: Your use of the derogatory term "kranks out" makes me suspect your relationship with your mother is not quite as rosy as it might be. This, on top of using your dad's insurance but not bothering to mention it to your mother (when you must have known ... (read in full...)
I apologised but customer wants me fired.
Q. So I work in fast food and our drive-through is open. I work as a cashier and drive-through. I don't know how to make food here as I've only been here seven months. Anyway, I accidentally misgendered a customer and now he/she won't stop at anything ...
A. 21 March 2020: There are people out there who have no empathy for others and who would rather see someone "punished" than be the bigger person and realize nobody is perfect. Let's hope this individual never makes a mistake and meets someone like the person they ... (read in full...)
I'm not sure if I should call her now, and let her know I like her, or wait for her to call me one day.
Q. So this may sound corny, but i just dont want to mess things up. i began a job back in june delivering auto parts to a small chain of car shops. in one of the stores i began a friendly relationship with one of the counter girls. She knows that i ...
A. 21 March 2020: Why would she not want to hear from you if she was "fired"? (Can't see she will have been actually fired, rather made redundant/laid off - huge difference.) Whatever the case, you were not responsible for her losing her job so she has no ax to grind ... (read in full...)
I kicked the cheater out, but miss what we once had.
Q. I kicked my boyfriend of 10 years out 6 months ago because I found out he’d been having an affair with someone from work. It wasn’t just an affair. He had been leading a double life for the 5 months that the affair went on for. Everyone in their wo...
A. 20 March 2020: There is a glaring error in your post. You don't miss what you HAD; you miss what you BELIEVED YOU HAD.
You believed you had a good relationship with a guy who was faithful to you. The truth was, as you found out later, he was always on the hunt... (read in full...)
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