Is my boyfriend a sex pest?
Q. Is my boyfriend a sex pest or am I just uninterested? I am a 42 year old divorced mother of two kids. I've been told I look young for my age and I think I do too. I waited two years before I "let down my walls" and just jumped head first into a r...
A. 4 February 2013: Dating is nothing but pain, I agree. I'm only 5 years younger than you find the same thing happens: meet up with someone and for some reason, the second date doesn't materialise.
But are you sure it's because they don't find you attracti... (read in full...)
Is telling the truth one option? How do I get out of this tangled web of lies that I created? My Imaginary Gay Boyfriend is causing problems with my ex and I
Q. Oh what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to deceive. Firstly let me just say that I am a really honest guy, who doesn't normally lie (truth) (Hard to believe when you hear my story). But one lie I told recently has snowballed into ...
A. 29 October 2012: Good decision. It'll be hard if your ex stops contacting you with no Joe, but it'll be better for you in the long run in terms of letting you move on.
You really do sound like a nice, clever, humorous guy (who has his moments!) and I'm sure you... (read in full...)
Is telling the truth one option? How do I get out of this tangled web of lies that I created? My Imaginary Gay Boyfriend is causing problems with my ex and I
Q. Oh what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to deceive. Firstly let me just say that I am a really honest guy, who doesn't normally lie (truth) (Hard to believe when you hear my story). But one lie I told recently has snowballed into ...
A. 28 October 2012: The way you wrote this also made me laugh; you have a talent!
But you're right, it's pretty tragic. Actually at the moment, it is not quite tragic, but it will definitely cross that line if you hire someone to pose as Joe (how are you going to... (read in full...)
Is being called sweet a major red flag and are relationships worth relocating for?
Q. Alright everyone, I know I should know the answers to these questions as a 24 year old man but I have not been in the appropriate environments for me as of ywr so please bear with my questions. I am about to date this one lady who is just two years ...
A. 28 October 2012: I can't see how being called sweet can be taken as anything but a compliment, but your explanation of the attitudes of where you have grown up may explain it.
I don't think you're in the friend zone with this lady. Nice/ good guys are very att... (read in full...)
I haven't heard from my boyfriend and I'm worried that something happened!
Q. Yesterday was my boyfriend's birthday, I was so excited to see him so I could give him gifts and stuff. I know his schedule for the day, he had work from 12:00- 6:00. So, I texted him at 10 in the morning, figuring that if he wasn't awake by then, ...
A. 27 October 2012: I don't get the feeling you seriously think there's something wrong with him, or you would have phoned him at the very least.
It doesn't sound like he's that keen on you if he didn't include you in his birthdays plans. And ignored your messages... (read in full...)
What's the best way to approach money issues in a relationship in a sensitive way?
Q. what's the best way to approach money issues in a relationship in a sensitive way? my bf and i have been together 2 years, he proposed a few months ago to my surprise and we're now buying a house. we live separately right now. i rent a flat so am in ...
A. 27 October 2012: I might be way off the mark but there are some similarities with this post:
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/i-feel-im-being-pressured-to-move-in.html
I wonder if you're the same person? Sorry if not! But if you are, have you sorted out the t... (read in full...)
I got too clingy! How can I show him that the old me is back?
Q. please help ive made an awful mess of this. ok i have a good friend and during the summer we became close. hes been with a girl 5 years. she has a lot of issues which hes explained. she needs lots of space, goes out drinking with guys from work and...
A. 27 October 2012: In know this isn't what you're asking but you state you are
1) not eating
2) paranoid
3) panicky
4) anxious
5) obsessive
I don't know whether this is your general personality or whether it all came up after the problems with this one g... (read in full...)
Its my first relationship but it doesn't feel normal!
Q. Me and this guy we have known each for 1 month now. We were complete strangers when we first met. Starting from the 5th day we known each he was talking about how much he loved me and how much he cares for me because of how much we have in common ...
A. 27 October 2012: I think you should certainly end the relationship, for the same reasons the other aunts have given.
You deserve better. Not every relationship is like this! He's taking advantage of your innocence, I feel, and trying to manipulate you..
... (read in full...)
Was he fake or for real?
Q. I'd appreciate some thoughts on this situation. Recently on a business holiday, I met a man in fairly unusual circumstances. We clicked instantly. There was a very strong attraction both physical and spiritual. I think it kind of shocked us both ...
A. 26 October 2012: I don't think he necessarily used you. I think he is being realistic about your options as a couple, and from his point of view he now sees that it's not very practical. But he likes you and it sounds like he wants to keep options open for the ... (read in full...)
What can I do? I feel embarrassed about how to approach a guy I used when we went on holidays together
Q. I've done something so terrible and feeling bad about it. I went on a trip with a guy in summer and there i was mourning and crying about my ex all the time and he comforted me and was there for me instead of being mad at me he was being a good...
A. 26 October 2012: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/is-it-too-late--how-do-i.html
Did you read all the answers when you posted about this previously, OP? ... (read in full...)
Do I choose to love the one I'm with? Or the exLDR who loves me but doesn't want an LDR again?
Q. Hello everyone. Any answers at all are so appreciated! I have been in an LDR for 2 years now. It's working fine. Before my current boyfriend I had a different LDR but with a guy who I had never met. I broke up with this guy before we got to mee...
A. 25 October 2012: There's a third option, which is to finish with both these guys (neither of whom can apparently fulfil you) and be single for a while. And then perhaps consider dating guys local to you and remove the complications involved in long distance ... (read in full...)
I want to share my wife with my old friend....
Q. I have had a fantasy about sharing my wife and the feelings have become stronger. My wife is aware of this fantasy. We have role played this for years approx 8yrs). Within the last 4 years I have been talking to her about bringing this to real life. ...
A. 24 October 2012: You've been talking about it for four long years and she has now agreed "to a certain point". Really, she doesn't want to do this. You have persuaded her, probably worn her down, and she's doing it to please you.
I think it's a terrible idea and... (read in full...)
I want to share my wife with my old friend....
Q. I have had a fantasy about sharing my wife and the feelings have become stronger. My wife is aware of this fantasy. We have role played this for years approx 8yrs). Within the last 4 years I have been talking to her about bringing this to real life. ...
A. 24 October 2012: You've been talking about it for four long years and she has now agreed "to a certain point". Really, she doesn't want to do this. You have persuaded her, probably worn her down, and she's doing it to please you.
I think it's a terrible idea and... (read in full...)
Going on a holiday in 2 days but I suffer panic attacks. Can anyone give me advice on how to lessen any rise in panic within me?
Q. After being cheated on I can't eat or drink much I suffer with panic attacks and I know that has something to do with it. I can't think about sex or a relationship at all to my advantage I'm going on holiday in two days. I just hope ill be able to ...
A. 22 October 2012: I agree with Cerebrus. You have to try to eat even if your stomach is in knots. Just little bits if it's all you can manage, but try to eat even though you have no appetite at the moment. Don't drink alcohol, especially if you haven't eaten.
A... (read in full...)
I've started taking the pill but the doctor gave no advice at all!
Q. so i went to my doctor and got the pill but she was no help at all with what to do. So i had to research and ask my friends, basically I started my period this monday, but i started taking the pill today. My friends said this is fine, because ...
A. 21 October 2012: *practitioner ... (read in full...)
I've started taking the pill but the doctor gave no advice at all!
Q. so i went to my doctor and got the pill but she was no help at all with what to do. So i had to research and ask my friends, basically I started my period this monday, but i started taking the pill today. My friends said this is fine, because ...
A. 21 October 2012: Your GP has been completely inadequate. If in doubt use condoms until your next menstrual cycle. In the mean time, go back to your GP (or to a family planning/ sexual health clinic) and ask a doctor or nurse exactly these questions you've asked us. ... (read in full...)
My gay girlfriend told me she was pregnant?
Q. I'm having some problems. The other week my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. Now I'm not stupid enough to be thinking its mine, I'm gay, it's impossible, that's the problem. She's obviosly been with a man. I've not spoken to her since she told ...
A. 21 October 2012: Hello,
I would have thought that you can't stay in the relationship if this is going to be a child you don't want (not surprisingly in the circumstances), and would you really want to stay with an unfaithful partner anyway?
Your ex girlfriend g... (read in full...)
What is the simplest way to get a legal separation in Scotland?
Q. Hi can anyone advise please what is the simplest way to get legal separation in Scotland. I have seen some sites but confused as some day best for both partners to go meet a solicitor while some advise its a form D8 that needs to be filled with a ...
A. 21 October 2012: Sorry I can't offer any help to this specific question but I do suggest you visit your local Citizens Advise Bureau. I'm sure they'll be familiar wiith all the practical and legal issues. All the best. ... (read in full...)
Is my boyfriend a sex pest?
Q. Is my boyfriend a sex pest or am I just uninterested? I am a 42 year old divorced mother of two kids. I've been told I look young for my age and I think I do too. I waited two years before I "let down my walls" and just jumped head first into a r...
A. 19 October 2012: It sounds like you did the right thing. Good luck x... (read in full...)
Is my boyfriend a sex pest?
Q. Is my boyfriend a sex pest or am I just uninterested? I am a 42 year old divorced mother of two kids. I've been told I look young for my age and I think I do too. I waited two years before I "let down my walls" and just jumped head first into a r...
A. 16 October 2012: I just wanted to share this with you. You can scroll down to the bit about sexuality (again, I'm not saying you should have to put up with any of this, but it might help make sense of things):
http:... (read in full...)
What would you do about this over friendly teacher?
Q. I wouldn't normally write something like this,but i need some type of advice. Last year i had a new teacher at school, at first i never exactly got on with him, but then he turned into my teacher and tutor. We didnt exactly get on but then he ...
A. 16 October 2012: I think you should talk to your guidance teacher (or whatever equivalent you have at your school). His behaviour is totally inappropriate and you are right in being concerned about his interest in young girls. You shouldn't keep this to yourself. ... (read in full...)
Is my boyfriend a sex pest?
Q. Is my boyfriend a sex pest or am I just uninterested? I am a 42 year old divorced mother of two kids. I've been told I look young for my age and I think I do too. I waited two years before I "let down my walls" and just jumped head first into a r...
A. 16 October 2012: Hello,
I read through this and the update about his head injury and I immediately thought that his impulsive sexual behaviour could well be a result of a traumatic brain injury. If his frontal lobes were involved it can change a persons personal... (read in full...)
GF doesn't like her engagement ring, what do I do?
Q. I recently proposed to my girlfriend who said yes. Our wedding is in March and she just finally told me that she doesn't like her ring because people don't know it's an engagement ring when they see it and it won't match her dress and clothes. It's ...
A. 16 October 2012: She seems a bit ignorant as to what an engagement ring "should" look like. I know that there's a fashion for solitaire diamonds now but that's not always been the case. I've seen plenty of engagement rings like the one you describe; a coloured ... (read in full...)
I want to marry my boyfriend but parents don't approve! And advice?
Q. I want to marry with my boyfriend but the problem is that we both same caste but in our religion same caste cant marry with each other. We both love each other so much, please suggest what should we do...then our parents agree......
A. 15 October 2012: I thought that it was preferable to marry someone of the same caste (not my personal view, but the general view). Did you mean you're from different castes?
Personally I don't think it should matter what caste you are from, but I honestly... (read in full...)
I'm in love with my new neighbour, but I've been in a FWB with my other neighbour for 2 months. How should I play this?
Q. I moved into my apartment building 2 months ago and met my neighbor shortly after the move in. We hit it off right away. We have been hooking up for about a month and a half. It is weird because its like we are in a relationship but we are not.. ...
A. 15 October 2012: And then you took the other girl out on a date:
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/first-date-should-it-be-the-expensive-restaurant45.html
Classy. ... (read in full...)
First Date: Should it be the expensive restaurant, or something less formal?
Q. Im taking my neighbor on a first date today. I knew she liked me and i liked her and decided to man up and ask her out. I asked her out bye inviting her to my bday party and asking her to play bp with me and she said shed rather kick my ass. so we ...
A. 15 October 2012: Well first of all you should finish things with the girl you're having sex wiith:
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/im-in-love-with-my-new-neighbour-but.html
And then worry about where to take the new girl on a date. ... (read in full...)
She's suddenly started ignoring my messages, what is wrong with her?
Q. I have been speaking to this girl online. she's 17 and i'm 19 and we got on well. we met up as friends and i met 3 of her other friends and it was great we got to know more about each other and things were fine. we carried on talking over facebook ...
A. 15 October 2012: Nothing is wrong with you. Sounds as if she has cooled off and isn't interested. It happens all the time with dating, unfortunately. I'm sure there have been girls who've liked you and you've not been very keen. Certainly it's not nice to be ignored ... (read in full...)
I'm in love with my new neighbour, but I've been in a FWB with my other neighbour for 2 months. How should I play this?
Q. I moved into my apartment building 2 months ago and met my neighbor shortly after the move in. We hit it off right away. We have been hooking up for about a month and a half. It is weird because its like we are in a relationship but we are not.. ...
A. 15 October 2012: I think you do know what to do but are too scared. The longer you leave it, the harder it will get. You have to tell her. She'll be upset but it'll be far worse if you allow her to think she's in a relationship with you and then leave her. ... (read in full...)
Is he wasting my time and stalling me? His actions so far are unreliable and inconsistent.
Q. Why is he acting funny towards me? I don't know what to think. This guy offered me his phone number when I asked for help with a class. When we spoke he didn't remember me, but a few days later I get a text from him about a place. Some friends ...
A. 14 October 2012: He stalled to say hi to you (or possibly give you the note book) and you purposely ignored him? What's all that about? Even if he did like you (doubtful) I'm sure he's changed his mind by now. ... (read in full...)
Any study tips please to allow me to study in a noisy environment?
Q. I could really use some help.. I have an important exam to sit for in about 2 months time,let's just say its going to be a life changing exam,it either breaks me or makes me.. BUT the place I live I wouldn't say its too noisy but in the afternoon...
A. 14 October 2012: Why is the library out of the question? Your can do a bit of walking about, though no stomping or pacing....!
I work in a hectic & sometimes noisy office and I put on headphones with music - nothing too distracting or loud. It's not ideal but it d... (read in full...)
Do some people throw away their real relationship for the sake of online affairs?
Q. I am wondering after ending a relationship due to his compulsive cyber cheating, whether it can be seen as something addictive. I have noticed a lot of questions on here about it. Do some people throw away their real relationship for the sake of ...
A. 13 October 2012: Like Youwish, I also know of a couple whose marriage broke down after he was caught having a cyber affair. They have 2 children together. His wife kicked him out, and he married the other woman. I do wonder if he is having more cyber affairs now, ... (read in full...)
Do I stay or go? Our relationship is one sided and there is no sex. Even though sex isn't everything
Q. Ok so been seeing this girl for 7 months first as a friend. I asked her out after 2 months. She said she needed to talk to her brother to ask if it was ok but she never did ask. After 3 months of hanging out we finally had sex Then one night wh...
A. 13 October 2012: Why won't she tell her brother and dad about? Are they very strict/ protective/ overbearing? And she doesn't speak to her mum.... sounds like her family is a bit odd.
Anyway, you're making a lot of effort for this girl. Maybe you could back off... (read in full...)
A guy randomly called me beautiful! Does he like me?
Q. I went to the store today and a guy who works at the store just randomly came up to me and told me I am so beautiful. We chatted a little and then I left. I was surprised because guys barely hit on me and I have never had a boyfriend, been asked ou...
A. 13 October 2012: What a lovely comment!
He may well be hitting on you, especially if he's your age.
Sometimes I have old men tell me how lovely my eyes are though and they're not hitting on me, just being chatty and nice.
Anyway, it's a lovely compliment... (read in full...)
Is he interested or just being polite after weeks of silence?
Q. A quick question for you all: Hadn't heard from this guy I had a crush on, in 5 weeks, then all of a sudden I get a beautifully worded text. All it did was apologise for the lack of contact, he had been very busy and asked how things were with...
A. 13 October 2012: The cynic in me asks what he was doing for these past 5 weeks? Was he busy with something he's neglected to mention... or was he dating someone else and it didn't work out?... (read in full...)
Marraige for 5years but we don't have sex
Q. I have been married for 5 years.My wife has a degree in bussines adminstration and i have a diploma in social work.The last one year i have suffered insults from her.I work on voluntary for a certain NGO in lusaka and they pay me 2million as a...
A. 13 October 2012: Sorry to read this.
Did you previously earn more than her? Has something changed in the dynamics since you met? If she's used to you earning more, and having a better income, she may be scared and feeling financially insecure. Maybe she's tr... (read in full...)
My ex boyfriend keeps texting me for sex!
Q. My ex boyfriend got dumped by his girlfriend now he keeps texting me asking for sex and it is really annoying me and my boyfriend now! I am ignoring him but he just isn't getting the picture, if I don't reply he gets a little abusive in the text...
A. 13 October 2012: I agree with Bondgirl. Ignore him. Keep ignoring him.
If he sends another text, save it in your phone so you can block him.
Whatever, don't add to the drama.
If it gets serious, however, you involve the police (in which case, keep evidenc... (read in full...)
Boyfriend really hurts me during sex
Q. My boyfriend hurts me when we have sex. I'm a small built girl and quite skinny and he's a whole lot heavier than me. He lies down ontop of me and puts all his weight on me. He grinds his chest into my boobs and literally drags my nipples down my ...
A. 12 October 2012: Well he sounds like a pig and I am really not sure why you've put up with it/ him.
Honestly, he sounds sadistic.
If he won't stop then you should stop having sex with him. ... (read in full...)
In an unhappy marriage and feel very sad and trapped. Please help.
Q. Help. My husband never allows me to get angry and express my self. He will threaten me with divorce and tells me i am inconveniencing him by causing problems. I bottle up my feelings for fear of his harsh words. I am always sacrificing for him and ...
A. 11 October 2012: I agree with SVC that counselling would be a good idea (though he doesn't sound the type to go along with it sadly).
If he won't listen to you, could you write him a letter telling him how you feel?
Do you have a family member or anyone else l... (read in full...)
Is it wrong to want a proper blow-job from my girlfriend?
Q. I've been with my girlfriend for 3 years, she's the only girl I've ever been with and I love her, everything is perfect but there is one thing she won't do for me. She won't finish me off with a blow-job ever. I'm not even asking her to swallow ...
A. 11 October 2012: p.s. if you want to 'finish' with the BJ and not have sex, remember to satisfy her either beforehand or straight away afterwards. Giving a BJ and not receiving anything back is not much fun.... ... (read in full...)
Is it wrong to want a proper blow-job from my girlfriend?
Q. I've been with my girlfriend for 3 years, she's the only girl I've ever been with and I love her, everything is perfect but there is one thing she won't do for me. She won't finish me off with a blow-job ever. I'm not even asking her to swallow ...
A. 11 October 2012: When she asks you if you want sex after a minute of the BJ, have you ever said "not just yet, this feels great!" or something similar? You could reassure her that you won't come in her mouth if she doesn't want you to. She won't know that this is ... (read in full...)
Is it too late ? How do I apologise sincerely and convincely? I know I messed up and ruined our trip gether.
Q. i was seeing a very nice guy soon after ending a long term relationship of 13 years. Unfortunately it only lasted a few months because I was not ready for a relationship so soon and he was hurt by me. we planned a trip together and right before...
A. 11 October 2012: Sending him a card to his new home, along with the apology, isn't a bad idea. It's a good opportunity (or maybe excuse) to get in touch with him. But no, I don't think you should send a gift. ... (read in full...)
I'm in love with my new neighbour, but I've been in a FWB with my other neighbour for 2 months. How should I play this?
Q. I moved into my apartment building 2 months ago and met my neighbor shortly after the move in. We hit it off right away. We have been hooking up for about a month and a half. It is weird because its like we are in a relationship but we are not.. ...
A. 11 October 2012: You haven't slept with the first girl for a week so she probably has a good idea that you've cooled off. However I think you should try to keep things nice (not least because she's a neighbour) - go and chat to her and tell her you'd like to be just ... (read in full...)
Is it too late ? How do I apologise sincerely and convincely? I know I messed up and ruined our trip gether.
Q. i was seeing a very nice guy soon after ending a long term relationship of 13 years. Unfortunately it only lasted a few months because I was not ready for a relationship so soon and he was hurt by me. we planned a trip together and right before...
A. 11 October 2012: It's never too late to apologise, and it shows that you're a good person. The thing is, you may not get a response. So of you write to him, let it be with the motive of making a genuine, selfless apology rather than because you want/ expect ... (read in full...)
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