No show, no text what should I do?
Q. I met this guy at work. We started texting recently we even made plans to hang out one night at the Movies. He kind of made it clear were friends but still flirts with me. He canceled the plans for family reasons. He hasn't texted me for a few days. ...
A. 1 July 2015: Nothing. Like Honeypie says, let him go. Don't call him, don't text him and if he contacts you don't mention the cancelled outting or try to schedule another. Maybe be a bit more formal with him and cut out the flirting (or don't respond to it wh... (read in full...)
Why does he lie about watching porn?
Q. My boyfriend sometimes lies about watching porn. Sometimes he doesn't but sometimes he does. Like I came up to the room and the door was locked and he just said he was cold and locked the door (I know he was masturbating though for sure so I'm not ...
A. 1 July 2015: Anyone who has eyes and can see is a visual creature, but I agree with the point that this is just some alone/private time he wants.
He might be secretive because he's somewhat self conscious about it and you putting a spotlight on it makes hi... (read in full...)
How can I resolve this problem? My trust in him has gone as I have a suspicion that my husband may have taken nude pictures of me
Q. In the past my husband has snapped pictures of me in the shower and changing. I told him to delete the pictures each time. I have told him he can't take nude pictures of me without my consent. This all started after we got married. Recently...
A. 1 July 2015: You are definitely not blowing this out of proportion.
There is something seriously wrong with your husband. I would not ask or even mention going through his computer. Even if he agrees to let you, that will only be after he's had a chance t... (read in full...)
Does his comment mean he isn't thinking into a future with me?
Q. I have a question about something my boyfriend said, but here's some background first: I've been with my boyfriend for over a year now. We're both the type who are marriage minded, and he has said he is dating me with the end goal of marriage. ...
A. 28 June 2015: You're reading too much into it. The topic was your children compared to HER children, not your children compared to his children.
That's my interpretation anyway.
... (read in full...)
Should I still go on seeing this man?
Q. I am recently widowed and have bumped into a man I met about 30 years ago who is also single and an OAP like me. The problem is I do not trust him, we have been going out together for about 18 month now and we have become intimate. He likes ball...
A. 28 June 2015: What would be the point in continuing to see this man? You're already unhappy with him, you don't trust him or see a future together.
Why wait? It will be harder to walk away later.... (read in full...)
Is it ok to help him out with money until he starts to get paid again? How do I make it clear it's temporary help?
Q. I recently started dating a guy, i really like a lot. He has been laid off of his job. Is it ok to help him out with money until he starts to get paid again? I dont make a lot of money but i live comfortably. If i do this how can i make sure he...
A. 28 June 2015: You're already doing far too much. It's unwise to become so familiar with someone at this early stage. It sets a bad a precedent.
If he's not working then he has more free time than you do to clean up after himself and wash his own clothes.... (read in full...)
Without making her mad, how do I let her know I want to sleep with her?
Q. I just met a woman at new housing development and signed paper work to buy a house from. She is know longer with the company and I have met with her once for coffee. My question is how can i let her i want to sleep with her witout offending her or ...
A. 26 June 2015: OP, your goal-besides getting into this woman's pants-is rather vague.
Are you worried about offending her because you'd like to continuing seeing her in hopes that it will lead to something serious or you simply don't want to blow your chances ... (read in full...)
He sent this woman sexual text messages but he said he did it because he thought it was a friend of mine I sent to play a trick
Q. Hello i am a 37 year old woman and i have been in a relationship with this 50 year old man for two years. We've gad some rocky times but overall its been nice, we love each other and we had plans to marry, but last night i was on the phone with him ...
A. 26 June 2015: I don't buy his story either. His indignation is more likely just a smoke screen. He's trying to divert your attention away from what he's done. Funny he never mentioned this 'joke' you played on him until now.... (read in full...)
Without making her mad, how do I let her know I want to sleep with her?
Q. I just met a woman at new housing development and signed paper work to buy a house from. She is know longer with the company and I have met with her once for coffee. My question is how can i let her i want to sleep with her witout offending her or ...
A. 26 June 2015: I assume that's all you want from her? One time or you want her be available to put out when the mood strikes you? ... (read in full...)
Is there any chance our friendship with this couple could be rekindled?
Q. My wife and I know a couple, A and B, who live 5 minutes away and we used to consider them good friends. I think we have only gotten together (just the 4 of us) 2 times in the last 3 years. They have said they are too busy to do much with us. We ...
A. 25 June 2015: I agree with Honeypie. Either something turned them off you, they just don't feel any friendship chemistry or you have served your purpose and they've moved on. Whatever the reason, you should too. To keep pursuing them makes you look desperate. ... (read in full...)
Am I right to feel a little scared about a man I had a brief fling with?
Q. Am I right to feel a little scared about a man I had a brief fling with? The thing is - he was lovely to start with, in the beginning, but then we fell out and split up due to his continual flirting with other women on FB. I called him a pl...
A. 24 June 2015: You've posted several times about this issue over the past few months. You met a guy online, dated a bit but suspected he was a player and you weren't ready for sex so you wisely declined him, only to regret it later when your friend decided to take ... (read in full...)
Is my behaviour really irrational, in the circumstances?
Q. hi, I am little confused with my boyfriends actions lately he thinks I am making a big deal out of nothing but I think it hurts me somewhere! Let me give you 2 instances Yesterday I asked his help to write a formal letter this was for my littl...
A. 24 June 2015: Irrational? It's not lunatic crazy or anything but I'd say it was unnecessary.
You might have been a bit hasty in asking for your boyfriend's help to draft the letter. You volunteered to do it and the fact that you ultimately did it yourself... (read in full...)
He claims to have picked me over all these gorgeous women but compares me to them anyway! Should I be flattered or hurt?
Q. I've been seeing my boyfriend for a few months and there is something that is starting to get me down. I'd like to know if I'm right to be a bit upset about it. We met each other on a dating site, we get on quite well and we are both very open p...
A. 23 June 2015: I'd be neither flattered nor hurt. I'd be WARY, very wary of a man who told me about all the beautiful women who want him and how I was a lucky gal because he picked me.
This is basic courtesy and common sense, OP. He wouldn't appreciate you sayi... (read in full...)
My friend says it's emotional blackmail. My mother says breakup with him. He's my first ''proper'' relationship. What should I do?
Q. So I've been in a relationship for 2 years, I just turned 17 and I have known him for goodness knows how long, we went to primary together and I know people say going out with you best friend never work but I genuinely thought we did, until the last ...
A. 22 June 2015: Your mum and your friend are right. Nothing more I can add to that.
... (read in full...)
Should I dump him? Also he tells me I need a breast implant for sagging breasts !
Q. I have been with a 64 year old guy who flirts and talks about women constantly (always younger women)! He rarely tells me I'm nice looking (I'm 61), he stares at good looking younger women and likes to hang out at his son's gatherings to be aroun...
A. 17 June 2015: You really need to ask?
He's a specimen. He isn't degrading you or any other women. He's degrading himself carrying on the way he does.
... (read in full...)
Does he like me? Why would he not insist on me keeping the present?
Q. My boyfriend got me an expensive gift for our one year. I also made him something meaningful. I told him he didn't have to spend so much so I said i'll return it back to him. He smiled and said yes, once I find the receipt. He even asked if he ...
A. 17 June 2015: I agree with everyone here.
Don't set people up like this. You should have accepted the gift with grace and left it alone.
... (read in full...)
My husband does nothing all day, How should I approach this?
Q. I have been married to a great man for 11 years, he is a little older than I. He retired from work about 2 years ago. Ever since he retired, he has been home all day everyday not doing much of anything at all, except watch tv. I don't think it's...
A. 17 June 2015: You've already approached the situation and nothing has changed.
It's difficult to believe that anyone would choose to be a hermit or a recluse because those folks are always portrayed negatively. They're never used to sell products or services... (read in full...)
Are these really relationship red flags, or am I making a big deal out of nothing?
Q. My gut instinct is telling me this relationship is already flawed but I am inexperienced in dating. This man and I are in our mid 40's. I was married for 15 years ( no kids) and he has never been married. His longest relationship was 5 years. ...
A. 17 June 2015: I think your gut instinct is correct.
The fact that he's on the dole with no plans to actually earn his own money in the foreseeable future is a biggie. He volunteers contradictory information about himself. His female tenants/roommate is a questi... (read in full...)
Met online. Do I move on or give him another chance? His need to 'control' bothered me.
Q. I joined a dating site hoping to meet new people and if i was lucky then to meet a guy and have a relationship with. I've been chatting to a guy for 3 week and we decided to meet. The date was ok. A couple of times he was on his phone selecting ...
A. 15 June 2015: No more chances. If he was that concerned about making a good impression he should have made better use of the first chance.
Culture often plays a huge role, but OP, you do not need to adapt to the ways of his country of origin. He moved to Brita... (read in full...)
She's my ex and yet she's still being demanding? What should I do for the best?
Q. Over a week ago I found my (ex) girlfriend on dating sites. It`s not the first time by a long way. Sometimes she lied about it, other times she blamed me for neglecting her, which I dispute and she would never explain why. In fact, it broke up...
A. 14 June 2015: Tell her to have a nice time on her date and wish her all the best for the future.
Then block and delete her.... (read in full...)
My husband's family are monsters and I don't want them to be around us!
Q. Hello, I'm in need of some advice. Course aren't we all? I'm 6 months pregnant and have a 7 year old as well. I'm with a very amazing lovable man. He is a wonderful father, and a blessing as a husband. He is my best friend and lover all in one...
A. 11 June 2015: I'm guessing your husband suffered some kind of child abuse?
You're expecting your second child? How are they with the first one? You haven't said anything about this one being mistreated in any way so I assume it was only your husband who was ... (read in full...)
My Bf discovered I was flirting with guys on Tinder.So we broke up. How can I convince my now ex-Bf he is the only one for me?
Q. My long term bf has found out Ive been harmlessly flirting with guys on tinder without wanting to meet them. It was just harmless. We had a bust up over me going on dating sites and we were broken up for for a month. I never wanted anybody else...
A. 11 June 2015: By not seeking, and being receptive to, the attentions of other men.
Your actions should CLEARLY match your intentions. No one should be put in the position of having to guess and hope for the best when making a huge investment.
Your boyfrien... (read in full...)
Should I send this woman a message? My husband has deleted and blocked her
Q. Hello, I have a really hard time getting over jealousy. Before my husband deploy to overseas he used to have this female friend who would call, text, email, facebook message him and she will talk for 4-5 hours just complaining about her boyf...
A. 10 June 2015: OP, I'm going to add to my response (I was on my cell phone when I submitted the first one).
There is nothing petty or childish about taking reasonable steps to safeguard your marriage, or your safety for that matter, or your psychologica... (read in full...)
Should I send this woman a message? My husband has deleted and blocked her
Q. Hello, I have a really hard time getting over jealousy. Before my husband deploy to overseas he used to have this female friend who would call, text, email, facebook message him and she will talk for 4-5 hours just complaining about her boyf...
A. 10 June 2015: Block her. You're not obliged to keep a line of communication open with anyone who would wittingly or unwittingly cause problems in your marriage regardless of how you know them.
Besides, if ge's not going to answer her it amounts to being bl... (read in full...)
Is he abusive or suffering a mental illness? Do I stay or go? What support might help?
Q. I would like an outsiders point of view. My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 months, but dated 3 years ago for about 9 months. He was my first for everything and I do love him deeply. He...
A. 7 June 2015: Whatever his mental health he is an abusive person who has FULL control of his actions. He doesn't pick on anyone who can or would actually hurt him and he backs down when he perceives a real possible threat. You've not been calming him do... (read in full...)
I feel my ex only thinks and cares about his own needs only, advice please!
Q. My ex lives with me for a yr now. He doesnt pay for anything at all including rent. Hes bought a jetski thats been fixed on off and dies again on off. He spent so much money on the jski and none on his 2kids. Hes always telling me that I should ...
A. 6 June 2015: Practice saying 'no' to him. Since he provides so many opportunities to sharpen your skills you'll master it in no time.
Perhaps you need help getting him out of your home. What about family or friends to support you. You could even role play wit... (read in full...)
I now know he lied to me about his ex, in order to break up with her, and be with me and it concerns me. Should I listen to my heart over this?
Q. I'm not sure how to handle the situation I'm in. My boyfriend and I are in a LDR and have been together about 2 years. We have plans to be engaged next year and move in together. However, there's something in my heart that I'm not able to let g...
A. 5 June 2015: How did you come to learn he had told lies about his ex? Did he come forward with it or did you find out from independent sources or is this still just a suspicion?
... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is tiring me out by following a routine that does not suit a young mother. What can I do to get him to realise this?
Q. Hi everyone my problem is my boyfriend we have been together for nearly 3 year we have a 5 month old son together. He goes to work, finishes at 4 comes to mine at 6 for tea, goes home, and comes back when our son is asleep. By then I'm tired and go...
A. 30 May 2015: This scenario sounds awfully familiar.
I have to agree that you ARE a single parent so perhaps you should begin acting as one.
Assuming I've understood this correctly, your boyfriend does not live with you but he has a key, or he doesn't ha... (read in full...)
My boyfriend had time to shoot some golf balls but no time to see me
Q. I am very upset at my boyfriend of 2 years. I am hoping you can tell me if you think I am justified or being unreasonable. He thinks I am being unreasonable. We see each other certain days every week due to different schedules. On one...
A. 26 May 2015: Yes, you did over react. Your boyfriend did nothing wrong and his explanation was perfectly reasonable.
He doesn't have to spend all his free time with you and he doesn't have to account for his movements when you two are apart. He is allowed ... (read in full...)
Should I tell my ex's girlfriend that we made out and had oral sex?
Q. I was recently in my ex's hometown and we hung out even though he has a girlfriend. He called me as soon as I got to my hotel and we had drinks. Within two hours we were making out, and fooling around (oral sex, boob sucking, dirty talk) he wanted ...
A. 26 May 2015: You've done enough so leave it alone and don't have any more contact with this man.
A confession would not be for her benefit but yours. Getting it off your chest places all that negativity squarely on hers. You had the fun but she gets to carry... (read in full...)
She says she don't remember her ex boyfriends sizes. Could it be?
Q. I am with a girl for about 5 yrs. I like her very much and our sexual life was very beautiful, until 3 months before, when disaster came. Here is what happened: I had never asked her anything about her past, I knew only what she had told me herself ...
A. 25 May 2015: Her story rings true to me.
Clearly you are far more interested in male genitalia (for comparison purposes) than she is so perhaps it's difficult for you to accept that she doesn't keep a mental filing system of her previous boyfriends' endowmen... (read in full...)
He seemed to treat our date as if I was on his payroll
Q. Hi everyone Please let me know if you think i am crazy but i went on a day out recently with the boss of a large firm. This guy has been flirting with me for ages and i agreed to go with him and his staff. I did seek assurance that i wouldnt be...
A. 25 May 2015: I have to agree with CindyCares.
For him to have treated you as if you were on the payroll, he would have had to have assigned you tasks or sent you on errands. In other words he would have put YOU to work for him. What he did do was, just as ... (read in full...)
Why does my ex blame me for his failed conquests?
Q. Why does my ex blame me for his failed conquests? I fell out with a guy I had a brief fling with. He is one of these smooth talkers, who likes to chat the women up - so I said I couldn't cope with his flirting around etc anymore. So anyway, we fi...
A. 23 May 2015: OP, I think you care a lot more than you're willing to admit (to us and yourself).
If he's an ex and not someone you're likely to ever get together with, why do you still have each other on Facebook? If he's blocked you, all the more reason t... (read in full...)
What am I to do about this flakey friend?
Q. At the beginning of this year, I starting getting on and becoming best friends with someone I had previously been best friends with. However, before this time we'd drifted apart a bit and weren't in each others' lives that much, so the friendship ...
A. 17 May 2015: I forgot to include this...it's probably a good thing that your friend didn't come over and you didn't get to tell her your big secret. It could be divine providence or fate (depending on your beliefs) and a message to you that perhaps you should ... (read in full...)
What am I to do about this flakey friend?
Q. At the beginning of this year, I starting getting on and becoming best friends with someone I had previously been best friends with. However, before this time we'd drifted apart a bit and weren't in each others' lives that much, so the friendship ...
A. 17 May 2015: Most welcome and thanks for the follow up.
Best of luck :)... (read in full...)
What am I to do about this flakey friend?
Q. At the beginning of this year, I starting getting on and becoming best friends with someone I had previously been best friends with. However, before this time we'd drifted apart a bit and weren't in each others' lives that much, so the friendship ...
A. 17 May 2015: I think you might be leaning on this friend a little too much. You might not be discussing your issues all of the time or even most of the time, but it sounds like you've done it enough that you've reached her tipping point. It does seem a bit much ... (read in full...)
I can't talk to him about how I feel I'm raising our daughters alone!
Q. Hello everyone I've been with my boyfriend for 3 and a half years we have 2 daughters lately I have been feeling like I'm a inconvenience to him we don't live together he doesn't want to live together yet or get married he goes to work drives over ...
A. 17 May 2015: For all intents and purposes, OP, you ARE a single mother and a single woman, so I suggest, like AuntyBimBim says, you start acting like one.
That means you do the things you would do if you thought of yourself as single, not necessarily running ... (read in full...)
Is this a girl who doesn't actually care about me or is confident?
Q. I've been seeing this girl for a while now. She never questions what I'm doing(like some controlling people do), who I'm hanging around etc. Doesn't involve me in ANY drama. And she rarely opens up about her own personal life, but is happy to answer ...
A. 13 May 2015: Not much to go on here but I'd say you should count your blessings. ... (read in full...)
A family holiday where my feelings were perhaps forgotten? Shouldn't they at least consider how I would feel, considering the problems last year?
Q. I kind of feel bad for even thinking this, but I feel really let down by my family and when I told them how I feel, I feel like they are basically telling me it doesn't matter how I feel. Basically every year for the past 4 years we have had a fa...
A. 5 May 2015: I agree with CindyCares. Your aunt is planning and paying for HER vacation and part of what makes it great is having her family with her, which is why she's willing to cover the additional cost.
She doesn't have to take a vote or consult ... (read in full...)
Should I stay away from my ex-emotional affair partner, even if I think he needs help?
Q. I have no contact for 4 months with the guy I had an "emotional affair" with. It's been close to a year now since it happened. I still hear about him because we have common friends. I tried to cut them off too for self-preservation but they've ...
A. 4 May 2015: You have history with him and you still have feelings so whether you admit it to yourself or not, you have an agenda. You can't be a true unbiased friend to him. And you can't fix him. Getting him to talk about his feelings or giving him a ste... (read in full...)
He just just sits there steaming. Why doesn't my husband of ten years accept that sometimes people do want to give me a compliment?
Q. I was wondering if anyone could help....my husband of 10 years hates when people compliment me. If we go anywhere and someone tells me I'm pretty he cringes. I always respond with a nice thank you. He just just sits there steaming. Why?? ...
A. 4 May 2015: Is it just compliments about your appearance he takes issue with or ANY kind of compliment? And just from other men? Are these men friends or just strangers you encounter while you're out?
It's actually quite rude to offer an unsolicited opinion ... (read in full...)
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