A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I have a really strange question to ask.Iv'e been involved with a married man for over 8yrs.and please i'm not here asking for comments regarding the long term affair.but today when i texted him and said i will not be home till later this afternoon as i am going to see my daughter and if you wish to call me do so later when i'm home,he does call me everyday.he then asked how was i getting to her place as she lives a fair way from me i told him she was coming to get me herself,he then said the strangest thing to me ,he said i would have asked my wife to come pick you up and take you if you had no other way of getting there.i do know his wife but what a strange thing to say to me.i said to him surely she would wonder why the heck you are asking her to do this and just how the hell did he know i was going visiting.and why another woman would be texting you to tell you her plans for the day.Why would he want to involve his wife in this?thats what i don't understand.
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (17 July 2013):
 maybe his wife holds the "keep your friends close and your enemies closer" attitude.
If I was trying to hide an affair from my hubby, I can see hiding it in plain sight...
I mean why in the world would the wife suspect he's having an affair with you if he throws you in her face.
that is option one
option two:
he wants her to find out so she leaves him and he doesn't have to pay a big settlement
option three
she knows about the affair and approves/accepts it.
A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (17 July 2013):
 Does he have an open relationship with his wife? Unless he was an idiot or looking from some inane filler-babble to say to you, if he meant it, that means that he has an arrangement with his wife, and she doesn't care whether you're with him or not.
Either way, that's a strange thing to say.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 July 2013): Maybe she is well aware of the affair and that's their type of relationship
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (17 July 2013):
 I think you are reading too much into this, this sounds like the typical thing that people say just to be nice or to sound nice, actually, without meaning it at all, and without thinking it through,- in practice he would never have done it.
Then again, if he had decided to do it, .. it's not that surprising after all . I mean, a long time, practiced cheater must have developped an uncanny ability for bulshitting his wife and telling her the most improbable crap with a straight face, so that she does not find him out OR she can decorously pretend she never found out. He would probably have told her " You know, that pesky , annoying woman that I know from ( church, work, whatever ). She bugged me for a lift to go see her daughter, would you be so kind ...?"
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (17 July 2013):
 "I WOULD HAVE asked my wife..." but he didn't. Like Trish said, either he is dumb as a post OR like the other one said, it was an empty gesture OR maybe it's both. What does it matter anyway, I think you have bigger issues to deal with than this anyway.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 July 2013): He probably was going to tell his wife you're a close friend or something... i guess
He didnt sound like he meant what he said, just a thing he said since there was no chance of him having to actually do it. It's easy to offer thoughtless help/advice when the situation is already taken care of. Therefore he simply didn't think through the logic of it since he wasnt really going to be needing to do it.
Gonna respect ur wishes not to talk about the obvious situation in ur post, but damn.... what planet are u living on where u think your story will end well anyway? UNLESSS ...unless ur dude likes polygamy... dunno if thats legal in canada
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 July 2013): What difference does it make? Why should there be any questions about anything when you choose a relationship like this? You want to be a mistress, you get what you get. He thinks he can be so bold to put you right in front of his wifes' face and nobody is the wiser. You know this women, yet you don't care what you are doing with her husband, so again, why would you be the least bit concerned about what the wife says or thinks or why he suggested such a thing? That didn't stop you when you got involved in it eight years ago...why would it now?
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (17 July 2013):
 Maybe he's not the brightest penny in the till? Not the sharpest pencil in the desk? Um, maybe he didn't think it through?
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