A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hello y'all ,I have been dating a guy for a few months - close to 3, but I have known him for a while. We were friends before anything happend. Things seem to be going well, we don't text every day, more like every other and I see him once, sometimes twice a week. Which I think is pretty normal for now. Isn't it? The other day we were hanging, and he said it bothers him he has never been inside my house and that he wants to come over. (Its usually just easier to go to his.) Why does he want to see my house so badly and why does it bother him so much? He has mentioned it a few times since. One of my co-workers said it may be because he wants to get more serious and wants to see what it would be like if we were living together. I'm on the fence with this theory. Wanted to see if any of y'all had any theories? Male input would be nice too! Thanks.
View related questions:
co-worker, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 October 2012): I'm not so sure its because he wants to get more serious and would like to get an idea how you live and what it would be like to live with you.
My guess is that he's known you for a long while now and that was even before you were 'Dating' (I guess?) , you spend your time with him at his house, so maybe he thinks its odd how you haven't ever invited him to your place, or he's simply bored of being at his place with you and would like a change of scenery?
A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (30 October 2012):
 Why not invite him over to a home-cooked meal?
I don't see the big deal in him wanting to see your place, you have seen his.
I do think it's a case of curiosity. Like Cerberus said you can tell a LOT about a person by looking at how they live.
...............................
A
female
reader, oldbag  +, writes (30 October 2012):
 Hi
After 3 months he probably just wants to see it, to go for a change of scenery. I don't know why he hasnt been already especially as he isn't somebody you just met, you were friends beforehand.
For all he knows you could be hiding something!
Next time you go out ask him to pick you up at your place then he can see it and you don't have to stop in, if thats whats bothering you? Or just invite him over for a meal if its not.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 October 2012): Simple curiosity really OP. You can tell a hell of a lot about a person by what their home is like.
At first it sounded to me like ye olde "I'd love to see the inside of your house *wink* *wink*" if you know what I mean but you've already spent time at his so that's not an issue.
OP getting to know someone is part of the game, and seeing a person's house can tell you far more about a person than anything they say. You could spend a year having dates and literally get to know a person far better by a night in their house.
I mean what photos have you on the wall, is it family, friends, are they positioned out of the way etc. You get to see who she views as important in her life and the events that are important. Plus one of the first things most women do when you first go to their place is whip out the photo albums, that can be great and very informative. What kind of magazines do you read? Is she a cosmo reader and perhaps a game player because of that, maybe she likes the enquirer or has a book shelf of old classics, or maybe sci fi. Is she a neat freak, a slob, does she eat healthy or lazily cook frozen ready meals. Does she eat low fat crap, have diet stuff or gym equipment gathering dust. What kind of movies has she in her collection. Has she an obsession with something say cats, cats on her cushions, pictures of cats on the walls etc.
A woman's bathroom is probably the most imformative place, there's a medicine cabinet medication can tell you a lot, you get to see all her grooming products etc.
To me going to a woman's place is basically a very good look inside the kind of person she is. A person can sell themselves as anything they want but a person's home will tell you more about the real them, plus there is a lot to talk about there too as you ask questions about things.
That's the reason I would be keen to go a woman's house.
But his reason could simply be a change of scenery OP, always his place can get old for him, it's nice to go somewhere different for a change.
One thing it's definitely not though is a sign of seriousness or what it would be like to live together. Seriously OP it's not a "sign" of anything like that. It's just a change of scenery and maybe a chance to get to know you better.
OP when it comes to us guys seriousness is a very obvious action, very obvious. We don't do hints, insinuations or things like that. We tell you we love you and that we see a future with you and we back that up by making a commitment to you and taking to the next level.
Although perhaps I could be wrong and you haven't yet been sexually active and maybe he thinks you'd be easier to bone in your place where you're more comfortable, in which case it is the *wink* *wink* thing.
...............................
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (30 October 2012):
 maybe he wants to check to make sure you are not hiding a husband.... or boyfriend or girlfriend even....
If i got to dating someone 1-2 times a week (if it includes saturday night especially yes) and plan to continue then it's got me investing time and effort and I don't want to not know the person I'm dating....
does not mean he wants to get more serious at this time... but it may mean he's trying to get to know you better....
I'd not look for why or worry... ya know you could ASK him... "hey I'd be happy to have you over for dinner and cook for you... but I'm curious as to what being at my house means for you? why is it important?"
...............................
A
male
reader, kenny + ♥, writes (30 October 2012):
 Suppose the relationship is coming to its three month mark and he just thought, hey i have never seen her house in all this time and wanted to take a look. I don't think there is anything sinister here, although it is a strange thing to ask. I think if i was in that situation i would wait to be asked over rather than invite myself. As for what your co- worked said, im not sure if thats the case, how can you get to know what it would be like living with someone by coming over for an evening.
...............................
|
