A
female
age
30-35,
*nordinary
writes:Who should come first, your Best Friend or your boyfriend?I love them both, but who should I dedicate most of my time to?My best friend and I have been friends for about 6 years. My boyfriend and I have only been together for about 6 months (Its sort of like a new love arising).I like to spend time with him and talk to him on the phone and everything. But what do I do when my best friend is calling on the other line? Or when she wants to hang out when my boyfriend and I are already together?I don't want to just leave him hanging for her, but I know that she would get upset if she feels that I left her hanging ANY of the time for him. Is that right? How should I handle this situation?
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female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (12 June 2012):
 Exactly what janniepeg said! You should come first.
It is NOT uncommon for girls to "forget" their friends when they have a new love interest. But I would try my best to give BOTH of them time. YOU need to find a balance that works for you.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2012): Your best friend was in your life for the last 6 years so you shouldn't 'replace' her just because you now have a new boyfriend. Boyfriends come and go, but true best friends are always there if you cherish and continue nurturing those relationships.
but at the same time you want to spend time with a new boyfriend too, it could get serious, you never know.
you should split your time between both of them. It shouldn't be a hard and fast rule of "A is always more important than B". Sometimes you should drop her for him, some times you should drop him for her. It just depends on the context. If you're talking on the phone with him and she calls, well he was there first so she can wait. If you were on the phone with her first and then he calls, then he should wait.
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A
female
reader, Xx-Scorpio-xX  +, writes (11 June 2012):
 For me,it depends on the case of who asked first. To me, it feels wrong if i was hanging out with one of them, and the other wanted to see me~ i would make them wait/organise another date. Same if they both wanted to do something on the same date~ i'd go with the one who i organised it with first :D
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (11 June 2012):
 You should come first. You don't want to be in the middle of a tug of war. You decide what's reasonable when you juggle time between the two of them. You don't have to calculate how much time you spend with each one. You should do as you please. Don't be with a person to appease his/her jealousy though or it could easily become a burden. Your friendship should still continue to be fun. You should reassure your friend that you are still the same person and cherish the friendship. Romantic partnerships are a fact of life but a childhood friendship is unique, it can last forever and can't be replaced. Triangular relationships can be tricky. Just remember that it can't quite be a three way relationship. It means when there are issues you deal with each one separately. Don't mix your boyfriend in when you need to discuss matters or complaints.
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