A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:I'm not attracted to women my own age, either socially or sexually. I'm a healthy, tall and well educated man, single but looking after two children who are now both teenagers and quite independent. Over the years relationships have tended to last as long as it takes to discover I've children and they actually live with me. I'm quite resigned to staying single and usually I'm quite happy with lots of friends, and people to go out with from 18 to the mid 30's. There's places I would feel uncomfortable because of my age where I'd stand out like a saw thumb...but other places I'm quite happy...I love festivals, and my two daughters complain that they cannot keep up with me; I charged around the dance village and the obscure "alternative" venues at the Glastonbury festival this year, then found another three festivals to finish my summer. My colleagues at work make remarks about my intentions, or I suspect jealousy when my students take me out (I'm well liked); though I'm the only one who seems to have not crossed the boundary of staff student relations...I wouldn't...I love my students, but not like that!My eldest daughters just gone off to university this year, I worry a little that they won't want to Rave around the UK with me for much longer...Most people are surprised when they discover my age (I've just turned 50), and I'm finding that suddenly I'm being asked out by 35-45 year old women with bunyons, locked into the music of the 1980's.I'm inclined to run away from them! Should I worry, I'm not interested in a relationship now, I rather fancy just growing old disgracefully without any regard for the norms of middle class / middle age existence, but think I might be the only one out there in time.
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2009): I am a women and feel the same way as you too. As men age they become very set in thier ways, In addition ED kicks in and that is not fun. Younger men are used to egalitarian relationships and compromise more. As women earn more money they can wait for the right one and not settle just to have a man.
A
male
reader, GrimmReality  +, writes (2 October 2009):
 Dont worry about it at all.....Go for it..AND LONG LIVE HAWKWIND!!!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 October 2009): Everyone is responsible for their own happiness and you seem to have found what makes you happy, so kudos to you. There are a couple of things I want to mention...you say you have two 'teenage' daughters that are pretty much independent....I don't know exactly how old they are, but teenage girls need their fathers to guide them and help them make good decisions at this critical time of their life. Please don't get so caught up in your own life that you miss something important with your daughters.
Second, don't choose someone just because of their age. This also can bring you misery. My brother married a girl that is 14 years his junior and she is going to bankrupt him!!! She is lazy, has put on 30 lbs., never cooks a meal and in general has no good qualities. He was so busy looking for a younger girl that he forgot to look at the person.
Other than that...have fun :)
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A
female
reader, natasia +, writes (1 October 2009):
 Well, who would want to be pursued by someone with bunions, of whatever age? I have a similar problem to you. I have tried a man much older than myself, and one much younger. I am now with one younger by 8 years, and I have to confess that I like this dynamic. In the same way that you dread bunions, I dread sensible shoes, kindly eyes and wistful gyrating whenever the Rolling Stones are mentioned. I feel about 17, so certainly am not prepared to be with someone older than my father ...
So you are not alone. I think one should always be slightly open-minded, though. I am. Only very slightly. I would take a lot of persuasion.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (1 October 2009):
Nah, don't worry. You only live once. Just make sure you treat those women with respect.
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A
female
reader, petina1 +, writes (1 October 2009):
 After reading your question, you so remind me of a guy who used to hang around with us when we were younger. He used to always do his own thing, dancing, enjoying himself, life and soul of party, never settling down or in to a routine. I don't go with you dont date or find people or older attractive because when someone hits it off with the 'right' person age would never come in to it, it's more like personalities hitting it off. The guy we used to know is still getting out and about, he's had the odd date from time to time, but still is now 'grey haired' and lives alone. I often wonder if in his quest to find what he was thinking he was looking for was always out of his reach and he tried too hard. You seem to be looking at yourself as you think others are looking at you and you probably are further away from the truth than you could imagine. Go out, relax and enjoy and let nature take it's course. You are trying too hard to portray an image that you seem to have of your self and you may be putting up a shield to keep the real you from appearing. You may be frightening the young girls away and putting off the mature women at the same time. I wonder what kind of role models or early encounters youve had to be this way. Just a thought, hope this helps.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 October 2009): Lots of young women unabashedly love dating older men. So as the older man now, why should you have to apologize for dating younger women? If an older gal gives you grief for it, ask her if she's ever dated anyone much older than she was at the time.
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A
female
reader, Lola1  +, writes (1 October 2009):
 Should you worry about being attracted to younger people and a younger lifestyle?
No. My boyfriend is 24 years my senior and also in his fifties. He enjoys clubs, concerts, travelling, playing the guitar and all kinds of other things. He says I keep him young. :-)
He can also maintain relationships with people his own age. He is very diverse.
I would remind you that people your age have a lot to offer, too, so I wouldn't write them off completely. But go ahead and enjoy your life. You may not be common, but you are not unique (in this capacity).
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A
female
reader, paddys wife +, writes (1 October 2009):
sounds like your enjoying your life without harming anyone so if your happy with your life style whats the problem ,as long as your honest about your free spirit go for it HEY MAN
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