A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi i am in a situation with my baby's father apparently he's with someone else now and we just broke up last week. It hurts to know that he's with the one girl he cheated on me last weekend but i am just doing fine what i wanted to ask was i dont really know what to do with him and the kids. Its only been a week since he last saw them i dont know whether to keep the kids from him or let him visit them but i just cant see him at all right now.Before all this happened my babys father was helping me watch our kids while i go to school during those two weeks my babys father has been nothing but a ungrateful piece of Sh*t. His negative energy drained me out i felt so horrible plus he wasnt doing his job watching our children. He would get frustrated very easily when my youngest would cry. So he made a hole in my bedroom wall. He was very aggressive towards me always yelling at me for nothing and he would get frustrated with the kids.Acting like he didnt want to be home with us.I feel i should just keep him out of our lives. But is it the right thing to do ? And im not planning this out of spite because he has another girl just from him treating me and my kids this way.
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male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (30 September 2011):
If you believe that you and your children are in danger from this man, then you have to take it to court and get a court order preventing him from seeing them.
If you just try to stop access, he will be able take you to court (possibly under kidnap charges), and he might well get shared custody or full custody.
No matter how bad he is, you do not have the power to just stop him from seeing his kids. That's illegal, and you and your kids will end up in long running court battles where you will told you are breaking the law.
If you are in danger, take it to court and get a court order. A judge will then decide what is best for the children. Do not attempt to block access yourself, or you could wind up in severe trouble.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (30 September 2011):
 IF you feel that the children are not safe with him then you need to take this to court.
Here in the United States one parent cannot refuse visitation with the other parent unless there is a court order for no contact or supervised visitation. And paying child support has no bearing on it (so that a deadbeat parent (mom or dad) who does not have custody but is not a danger to the children will still be not only allowed but the custodial parent will be FORCED to permit the visitation.
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