A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I was with my ex boyfriend for 1 year and 4 months before he dumped me saying he didn't love me anymore. This was about 3 months ago, we are still very good friends as I was not angry with him because he was honest with me about how he felt which is all I ever asked of him. I've met this other boy now who is lovely but I barely know him and am still in love with my ex. I have kissed him and am happy with him but can't help think about my ex and I know this is unfair, even though he knows about him. The problem is that my ex told me he was jealous of this new guy and that he's regretting breaking up with me, he hasn't been with anyone else since and I think he's just lonely especially since he is having family problems at the moment. I told him I'll be there for him regardless but he was also complaining about a lack of sex. I have told him to go and think about how he really feels while he is on holiday this week but I don't know what to do about this other guy. My ex said recently that he was confused when we broke up but at the time, he seemed very certain saying there was really no way he could see himself loving me again.I want to stay friends with him regardless and maybe more if things don't work out with my ex, but how do I tell him this without hurting him or making him feel like second best? Should I get back with my ex if he tells me he loves me and will make more effort this time?I know this is quite long but I find it hard to talk to my friends about this as they are friends with both boys and don't seem to understand how much I love my ex, that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. I know if he did still love me then we could do better than before.AHHH!!! Help please, I just need another perspective on this.
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female
reader, Skeez +, writes (7 August 2007):
 Talk with the new guy now..as it seems to me as your in no position to get into another relationship when you feel so uncertain.
Im sure he will understand.
and for your ex, if you feel as though you two can give it another go then talk with him also. ask him why he wants you back, make sure he means it and give him a trial. if things work out make it official
Goodluck xx
A
female
reader, hlskitten +, writes (7 August 2007):
 The new guy already is second best. You just said if it doesnt work with your ex.You cant really expect him to wait in the wings to see if it works out with your ex, if he did that, i would think hes a doormat personally.I would be honest with the new guy and say you're not in the right frame of mind to date someone right now, and let him move on.As for the ex, only you know if you want to get back with him.But thats a seperate issue and shouldnt involve the new guy.Hope it sorts out.C xxxxxx
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