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Planning on doing "it" tonight... but should I trim first?

Tagged as: Sex, Teenage, Virginity<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (1 March 2007) 28 Answers - (Newest, 12 April 2007)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Im 14 and planning on having sex at a house party. It is my first time and I was just wondering if anyone knows if teenage boys prefer shaved or natural hairs? Please reply asap as the house party is tonight and I would like to know. so i can shave before the party... Thanks ...

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (12 April 2007):

house party? anyone could walk in!!!!

but yes deary, shave :)

put hair conditioner on instead of soap when you shave, it won't make it sore or anything a few days after as was said in a previos comment :)

but have fun =]

x

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A reader, anonymous, writes (3 April 2007):

go ahead!!

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A female reader, pieinthesky29 United Kingdom +, writes (7 March 2007):

pieinthesky29 agony auntI can understand where you're coming from, that you want to have fun any everything, but think you should consider it strongly beforehand okay? I was in a similar situation as you some months ago, (I'm 15) although i really wasn't planning to do it.

I did do it wuth a guy I was friends with at a party and yeah it was fine but i realise now that although some people just found it surprising/funny, I've lost respect from quite a number of people, who of course don't say it to my face but really are a bit disappointed. And some of the guys in school started talking to me, and a few hinted they wanted to have sex with me, thinking I'll be an easy target

do you really want that reputation? I'm working on getting mine back, and that was just after sex one time as well, it will have serious consequences, hear this from someone who's been through it, and think hard before you do this

i realise now this was posted a while ago, so kind of irrelevant now, but if you consider it again and didn't do it that time, have a read

what did you do in the end?

x

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A female reader, NuttyGooner United Kingdom +, writes (2 March 2007):

NuttyGooner agony auntSorry Lana - I disagree,

I'm not prepared to give advice to incite someone to break the law. Would you put someone in touch with the right person if they wanted to hire a contract killer?

Thought not.

It's called being responsible.

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A female reader, Saz464 United Kingdom +, writes (2 March 2007):

Saz464 agony auntIf you ignore all advice about not doing it then all I can offer is that you do shave but be very careful not to cut yourself by mistake and be warned, a few days afterwards it will be itchy [and very sore] down there.

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A female reader, x lana x United Kingdom +, writes (2 March 2007):

x lana x agony aunteven though people are trying to put you off, if you hav your mind set on this then your going to do it anyway whether these people tell you different! that wasnt the answer to the question you wanted, they were just critisizing you. yes you should 'trim' as you put it... not many lads like going down and getin a mouthful of hair lmao! just be aware of the consequences and make sure you use protection.

have fun x

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A female reader, willywombat United Kingdom +, writes (1 March 2007):

willywombat agony auntbirdynumnums, you are SO right!!

Yep, to the question asker, don't have sex at this party!! Imagine if it gets out at school - you gonna be able to live with that?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2007):

Certain types of sexual behavior increase a woman's risk of getting HPV infection and Cervical Cancer:

having sex at an early age

having many sexual partners

having a partner who has had many sex partners

having sex with uncircumcised males

HPV infection occurs mainly in young women and is less common in women over 30. The reason for this is not known. Uncircumcised men are thought to be more likely to harbor the virus. HPV can be present for years with no symptoms, and HPV infection does not always cause warts or other symptoms; so you can be infected with HPV and pass it on without knowing it. Recent studies show that condoms ("rubbers"), while they do provide some protection, do not completely protect against HPV. This is because HPV can be passed from person to person by skin-to-skin contact with any HPV-infected area of the body, such as skin of the genital or anal area not covered by the condom. The absence of visible warts cannot be used to decide whether caution is needed, because HPV can be passed to another person even when there are no visible warts or other symptoms.

Although condoms do not completely protect against HPV, it is still important to use condoms to protect against AIDS and other sexually transmitted illnesses that are passed on through some body fluids.

Although it is necessary to have had HPV for cervical cancer to develop, most women with this virus do not develop cancer. Doctors feel that other factors must come into play for cancer to develop. Some of the known factors are listed below.

Smoking: Women who smoke are about twice as likely as non-smokers to get cervical cancer. Smoking exposes the body to many cancer-causing chemicals that affect more than the lungs. These harmful substances are absorbed by the lungs and carried in the bloodstream throughout the body. Tobacco by-products have been found in the cervical mucus of women who smoke. Researchers believe that these substances damage the DNA of cells in the cervix and may contribute to the development of cervical cancer.

Human immunodeficiency virus (HIV) infection: HIV is the virus that causes acquired immunodeficiency syndrome (AIDS). Because this virus damages the body's immune system, it makes women more at risk for HPV infections, which may increase the risk of cervical cancer. Scientists believe that the immune system is important in destroying cancer cells and slowing their growth and spread. In women infected with HIV, a cervical precancer might develop into an invasive cancer faster than it normally would.

Chlamydia infection: Chlamydia is a relatively common kind of bacteria that can infect the female reproductive system. It is spread by sexual contact. Although infection may cause symptoms, many women do not know they are infected unless samples taken at the time of their Pap test are analyzed for this type of bacteria.

Some recent studies suggest that women whose blood test results show past or current chlamydia infection are at greater risk for cervical cancer than are women with a negative blood test. Although further studies are needed to confirm this finding, there is already good reason to avoid this infection and to have it treated with antibiotics promptly after diagnosis. Long-term chlamydia infection is well known as a cause of pelvic inflammation that can lead to infertility.

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A female reader, birdynumnums Canada +, writes (1 March 2007):

birdynumnums agony auntHi,

Have you ever hooked up with a guy and then regretted seeing him at school the next day? And then seeing his friends laughing everyday at school for the rest of the year? Give some serious thought to waiting until Uni when you are a better judge of character and more in control of your life and relationships. I always liked the line in the movie "Clueless" - "High school boys, As If!!! I'm fussy about the Shoes that I wear - and They only go on my Feet". Frankly and to be honest, for most women, sex is not wonderful until you are with someone who you can relax and enjoy yourself with, and he has to know what he's doing.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2007):

please do not do anything you think you are going to regret give it seriouse considaration a girl in my year has had sex and has had nothing but slag said to her please think about this !!!

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A female reader, NuttyGooner United Kingdom +, writes (1 March 2007):

NuttyGooner agony auntYou'll have a better time afterwards by just saying "no".

At least you won't get branded the shcool bike for years to come, you'll have some dignity and - it might sound daft to you - but guys respect girls who don't give it away with a can of Super Skol in a house party.

Have more fun being an aloof ice queen, at least you will not have people gossiping about you behind your back about what an easy lay you are - trust me, it's a slippery slope! I've seen it happen to some good friends of mine.

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A female reader, sugabean South Africa +, writes (1 March 2007):

HI.. im an 18 year old girl. I am still a virgin a plan on it till marrage!!! so far it has been the best thing i have done!wat an accomplishment so far.Dont get me wrong i am not against sex i just would love to give it to the person i spend my life with!! my advice to you is to rather abstain from doing is espacially cuz your so young you have a whole life. For him mo matter his age it will be one night of pleasure then guess what he will move on!! You on the other hand will have to deal with it emotionally.not to mention the risks you are taking beacuse let me tell you anything is possible.. I just hope and pray you dont make the wrong discision. you will only hurt yourself. your setting yourself up for a trap

Good luck and please let me know what happened

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2007):

i was in ur situation about a year ago.. it happened and i regretted in immediately. trust me its not worth it if da guy dont love u. u want ur first time to be special and if da guy aint willing to make an effort for that then hes a penis and you should not even consider KISSING him!

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A female reader, sachluph United Kingdom +, writes (1 March 2007):

sachluph agony aunt14 is very young to think about having sex, please have a rethink, is this really what you want to do?

I lost my viginity very young too, I was 16, I have so many regrets about it, please don't make the same mistake.

Peace & Love x

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A male reader, kenny United Kingdom + , writes (1 March 2007):

kenny agony auntI must agree with the other aunts, i think you are to young to think about having sex. Go out, have fun, and leave all that stuff till when you are older.

Good luck x

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A female reader, Whisper United Kingdom +, writes (1 March 2007):

Whisper agony auntYou are way to young to be having sex, when i was your age i was still playing with dolls!! Please think carefully about who you have sex with and more importantly why your having sex with them, it doesnt even sound like you have a steady boyfriend. Think about it long and hard before you do, because if you have a bad experience you ill regret it for the rest of your life, call me a boring old fart, but c'mon people, where is the love?? x Take care and wait, trimmimg shouldnt even matter lol xx

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A female reader, Whisper United Kingdom +, writes (1 March 2007):

Whisper agony auntYou are way to young to be having sex, when i was your age i was still playing with dolls!! Please think carefully about who you have sex with and more importantly why your having sex with them, it doesnt even sound like you have a steady boyfriend. Think about it long and hard before you do, because if you have a bad experience you ill regret it for the rest of your life, call me a boring old fart, but c'mon people, where is the love?? x

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A reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2007):

I personally think you are too young to be having sex. What is the rush?? It should never be planned. It should be with the person that you love. It should be special and beautiful. It should always be protected sex.

Take care and wait.

xx

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2007):

iv read what everyone has said and i am totally with them but also you want to look at the practicalities aswell. when a girl loses their virginity they often experience a quite painful stinging sensation and quite often bleed quite a bit afterwards which you may find embarrassing if you are at a house party with other people i know i would. losing your viginity should be in private with some-one you love were you wont feel embarrassed when this happens. please read what i have written i dont want to lecture you as i know its your choice but id like you to understand what it involves so you dont end up bein embarrassed

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2007):

Please do not do this are you MAD!! You are underage for a start and if you were to get caught or worse fall pregnant you are looking to got to court him too!! You are far too young to even be considering doing such a thing when my daughter was 14 she was studying hard for exams she never had time for many parties and i did not allow her to certain things as i know these thing are tempting and you should never put yourself in that position as to feel under peer pressure to do something that i am almost certain you will REGRET!! so please listen to someone who could be your mother do not so this save yourself for someone you will meet later in life and then only then after courting or dating and getting to know him should you consider this who wants used goods !! think very careful about this and don't ever do anything you don't want take care and please be careful with drink it is a number of the brain.

Concerned Mum.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2007):

omg babe I'm 14 and I think you should reconsider having sex, honestly I have friends who've done that and really regreted it, some have gotten pregnant. All I can say is if you are certain you're gonna do it use condoms and take the morning after pill just to be sure. Oh yeah and DO NOT shave! wax instead, shavin irritates your skin!! But please reconsider, you dont wanna lose your virginity like that, lose it to someone who's in a propa relationship with you and who really loves and adores you and when your at least 16. Good luck! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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A female reader, Gwyneth United States +, writes (1 March 2007):

Gwyneth agony auntMon Dieu! Ma petite fille, you are so young! I'm sure you don't want to be lectured, so I won't do that. But, darling, take it from a woman somewhat more experienced in these matters, don't worry about trimming or anything else. In fact, don't worry about anything. Go to the party. Be beautiful. And, make them all know how truly fabulous you are by not diving in the sack so unceremoniously.

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A male reader, Ponungalungb United States +, writes (1 March 2007):

Ponungalungb agony auntSo this is what goes on at house parties? I often wondered.

What ever happened to "Spin the Bottle" and "Post Office"?

Are the new games "Trim Your Bush", and "Deflower the Virgin"? LOL.

Exactly how many "boys" do you plan on giving a free ride?

Do yourself a favor and let the "boys" wait a few years. You'll be glad you did. Listen to your elders, like me and Willywombat, we know what we're talking about.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2007):

I totally agree with whats already been said your first time is meant to be something special and meaningfull.A house party dosent sound that ideal to be losing virginity and i think in time you may well regret doing it like this.WHATS THE RUSH anyway your only 14 !!!!!! i wouldnt worry to much about shaving or not i would worry more about regreting it.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2007):

Shaving for the first time is almost certain to cause razor burn, which will look horrendous. However, not cleaning up will look unkempt and burly. It sounds like tonight is not such a good night, either way. Also, the first time is excruciatingly painful. I wouldn't be too excited. You are young, and if you start having sex now, by the time your in your mid-20's, you're used goods. It'll be difficult to enter into a healthy, stable relationship with a decent man if you've slept with that many people. Starting at 14 is a surefire way to ensure that you're loosy goosy later on. If you're ok with that, then by all means, go for it, pimply razor burn and all. Just use a condom. It'll protect you against HPV, and other nasty stuff. And believe me, all of the cervical snipping that is necessary to biopsy HPV is not worth it. Good luck. Be smart and look out for yourself....not only for who you are now, but for who you want to be in the future.

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A female reader, xxteganxx United Kingdom +, writes (1 March 2007):

I agree why are you wanting to do this at your age your so young. Also why at some house party with no privacy, being underage and not being in love.

You should wait till your old enough before even doing something so grown up you would only regret it! Wait untill your older more responsible and with someone you truley care about.

You shouldnt experience the act of love until your in love. And when you old enough.

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A female reader, Flowers United States +, writes (1 March 2007):

Flowers agony aunthi, You should not have sex so early especialy if its a inthing! and at ure age u should think at what u going to be when ure older (doctor,teacher) dont keep ure self bussy with stuff u can ruin ure whole teenage life!

What u gonna do if u fall pregnant? mommy i had a Ooooops!

its a simple No no no and besides its illegal.

Go to party and have fun thats all

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A female reader, willywombat United Kingdom +, writes (1 March 2007):

willywombat agony auntFirst and foremost, you are underage. So why on earth are you considering having sex?

Secondly I feel that nobody should really be answering this question as it is inappropriate to answer a question about shaving or not as so as to make yourself more 'desirable' or acceptable for something that is (in the UK) illegal.

Call me an old fuddy-duddy or whatever but shouldn't you be just talking about kissing or first base at your age?

C'mon, why give yourself away so freely at such a young age? You WILL regret it, I promise.

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