A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Ok... I'm so confused.I am currently engaged. Not the best relationship by any means, but I am engaged and hoping for it to get better after a big move happens to get away from his insane and cruel family who hurt us pretty bad.Oddly enough, my question is about someone and something different. i just stated I'm engaged so it's known. I have many celebrity friends, and I mean actual friends, not just people I randomly follow. My favorite show has been airing for many years, and I felt bad for one of the cast members so I sent them a message just to be nice because I'm a very empathetic type of person. I care 'way' too much. We've talked, we've laughed, we've messaged almost daily for a week now. We've chatted about music, his divorce situation because he cheated and messed up pretty bad etc... Well, I'm an open book and pretty blunt. His ex posted pictures of his conversations with other women when they were still working on things, and he seemed very quick to jump into sexual conversations with these random people behind his wife's back.Well they are currently separated and in the middle of a divorce. I tried to be there and help him feel better. He's sent me messages, voice ones, and just text ones via Instagram. Even random pics of himself constantly... and people do pay him for cameos. He considers himself a 'star' and 'attractive'. Which to me I guess he kind of is, but I like dorkier type men. That's just how I am lol.... Well anyways, I asked a random question and he was quick to say he has no interest in a relationship with myself or anyone else, and then I made him uncomfortable when I asked a personal question in which he said was fine to ask. He said 'I don't feel comfortable discussing this.'. Ok... so he felt fine sending d*ck pics, saving every nude pic he got from 'fans', etc...... tells me I'm cute and likes my voice... but then acts weird as hell if anything I say isn't strictly pg rated and about stupid shit?Is this just his way of avoiding the truth and saying look you're not my type? Did the break up with his wife just make him salty? Is he just fucking with my head? I'm confused what to even think. I even told him I didn't want a relationship, since I'm in one. Yet he continiously repeats he doesn't want one, and doesn't want to talk about sex stuff. (It wasn't even bad, I was just asking if he was more of a dom. period.) He answered he was. Then before I know it he 'disappears' yet again. So I went a message asking what is going on.... and to just be blunt if it's just me in general he's not interest in... even as a friend. I feel like he's sending mixed signals!What on earth is going on!? sigh.... thanks.
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divorce, engaged, his ex, period, text Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 January 2019): I'm going to be frank. Your posts are very contradictory and all over the place. Your motives and intentions towards this so-called celebrity seem erratic and confusing. The style of writing used may be throwing-off exactly what you mean; because of poor sentence-structure and many grammatical errors.
If you're engaged, there seems to be far too much interaction with this celeb-guy. I'm skeptical of the accuracy of your commentary; and not quite sure where you're going with your communication with the guy.
I wouldn't hesitate to say you're confusing him; and he probably has no idea where you're coming from. It seems you're trying to create drama and some sort of ongoing relationship. What kind of relationship that is, that's the question? You are trying to make your connection more familiar than it actually is. He is corresponding with you as he communicates with any fan. You're confused only because you think it's more than what it is.
Popular male public-figures vying for celebrity-status are used to a lot of female-attention. It boosts their egos; and they crave media-exposure. So they welcome the ladies who admire them. The more the merrier! They coax women into sending them photos and likes; that's how they grow their fan-base. Making you believe he has some special-interest directed specifically at you. It's typical player-behavior. He's a manipulator. It's what his job demands. He wants to be a media icon and a heartthrob! He's establishing his brand! He's nothing but a gimmicky media-hound!
Sorry if I was off about what I said; but I doubt that I was. I think you just don't like it.
I still believe this is quite weird, and pop-culture and celebrity-idolization might be more appropriate for someone in their teens and early 20's. I can see where your fiance is uncomfortable; and there may be some justification why his parents are unsure about you. You are somewhat abrasive and defensive; but you did ask for opinion in an open-forum.
Sometimes people misunderstand our ways and may misjudge us. If you want your engagement to remain intact; I think you should disconnect with that wannabe-celebrity. I don't think he fully comprehends your intentions; and I think you're a nice person, but often misunderstood. I also think that guy is a conceited jerk, and you should try to make real friends with people who are more ordinary and sincere.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 January 2019): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI am the original poster of this question...Oh, and the majority of you do have it all wrong. I am not 'allowed' to have friends of any gender. I have not cheated, I have felt guilty befriending people because it makes my fiance uncomfortable because he, himself, has done things he shouldn't have in the past and puts it on me. His family didn't like me since day once (2000) and when I lost my weight, I was told in 2015 I am not ACCEPTED by them because I'm no longer disgustingly fat. So no, I assure you, I'm not just taking an innocent man from his loving family. I moved here away from my family for 14 years and have been verbally abused since day one. Even when I miscarried both of our children. My fiance left me at the hospital alone, he now regrets it, and his parents scolded me on having premarital sex and that I deserved it. Mind you, they're not religious. However, their daughter who is my exact age met a random guy, told the parents she's bored and doesn't identify as a female or male, and figured she'd have a kid. They are not married. The family are kind to them. Bought them a house, two cars, etc etc etc and have literally told other people, other family members, etc that they dislike their son because he picked starting a relationship so early and they didn't approve of it. Yet now it's ok, but just for his sister and her boyfriend... i mean girlfriend, i mean... they don't use labels. I don't know wtf they are. I think I was overly tired when I wrote this post.
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 January 2019): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI am the original poster of this question...If you reread my message, not once did I say I tried to talk sexual nor did I say I personally got d*ck pictures. I said he sent them out like crazy and was really weird about it to other girls etc. My confusion was he assumed everything I said must of insinuated I wanted to be 'sexual' with him or have some sort of relationship. I flat out said to him, FRIENDSHIP ONLY. He's married. I'm engaged. And now I'm starting to see he's sort of a narcissist. His now ex was right lol... he has one type of girl, which hey cool. But don't ask for a picture (and I sent only a pg rated one, that's it) and say how cute I am but then flip shit other days it's weird as hell. Then spam text me/call me/insta me... it's weird! I'm slowly backing off this friendship. I'm not worried, because I didn't say anything bad to them that could ruin my current engagement. Mind you, I've been with my current since I was 13... I'm 32. We were great until we moved near his folks. Now we are moving to where MY family live who actually ACCEPT us.
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious  + ♥, writes (28 January 2019):
 Should you not be concentrating on your relationship with your fiance rather than some random "star"? Your description of your relationship sounds like there could be much work needed.
Does your fiance know about your "friendship" with this guy? Have you asked HIS opinion on it?
I am a lot older than you, have had numerous REAL male friends over the years and still do (i.e. no hidden agendas, no sexual conversations, just real friendship). Not one of them has ever sent me a pic of his junk. Were this to happen, they would be immediately sidelined and we would no longer be friends. This new "friend" doesn't sound like a very nice person at all. If you need to feel useful/supportive, perhaps you could volunteer to help people who are truly in need, like the elderly or the homeless?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 January 2019): This is the creepiest post I've read in awhile. Reality-TV celebrities are not real celebs. They're people like you and me; and only popular due to exposure of their personal-lives through TV and social media.
Nothing is going to come of your connection with this guy. You're just another fan and tribute to his ego.
Trust me. He has dozens of these conversations going on at a time; and some may not even be coming from him, but hackers who found you. You're considered one of his nutty-fans, and he's preying on your idol-worship.
What's going on?
Nothing!
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A
male
reader, N91 +, writes (27 January 2019):
 What are you asking here? This sounds like a bizarre situation.
What you’re describing doesn’t sound like a friendship. My female friends don’t send me nude pictures. It sounds like you’ve got a guy who’s trying to get you into bed, why would he be sending you dick pics if he’s not interested? Why are you chatting to a guy who’s sending you dick pictures?
Sounds like you’re just speaking to him because he’s ‘famous’ just to say you know a celeb. Can’t think why else you’d be trying to work out what this guys up to when he’s sending very inappropriate messages.
Concentrate on your ‘not so great’ relationship.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (27 January 2019):
 Eh SO freaking what that he is some Z-list "celebrity" WHO the F cares?!
You know his conversations with you aren't appropriate, he doesn't exactly act very much like a friend towards you - but my guess is yo uare SO "impressed" because of his "celebrity status" that you are "allowing" his crass behavior.
OP, he OBVIOUSLY have tons of women throwing themselves as you, just because you "supported" him and rubbed his big ego - but you are JUST that... like the rest of them.. an ADMIRER.
He also stated he wants NOTHING to do with you, even as a "friend" so BLOCK the douche canoe and focus on your OWN relationship instead of these fake people.
You enjoyed the entertainment and "fame" he has because you have a crappy relationship. You really think moving or getting married is going to fix that? If so, GET OFF social media "befriending" celebrities and WORK to make the relationship work BEFORE getting married.
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (27 January 2019):
 I dont get what your question is. You are engaged in a crappy relationship, yet are fine with getting dick pics and talking about sex with this cheating man. And then you think HE is sending mixed signals? Look, you are the one mixing it up here, not him.
Decide your relationship status and stick to it. Its simple. Everything else is just drama.
And how on earth is your celebrity-status at all relevant? Just.. really weird how you think that somehow matters.
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